Grel had also survived the initial surprise attack and was contributing his blood lust to the kill zone. Out of weapons charge, he ran his Battlepod at full throttle into the swarm of Battloids attacking his commander's position. But a miscalculation inadvertently brought him crashing against one of the mecha's hand-guns, setting loose the cannon's final charge. The force of the blast threw Grel's Battlepod into a back flip, while the slug itself ripped from the muzzle and blew away the arm of Azonia's Officer's Pod.
Khyron saw her go down in a fiery fall and leaped from the cannon seat to run to her aid. Bolts of energy crisscrossed overhead and explosions erupted around him as he ran, a broken-field runner in hell. A Battloid thought to stop him, but he felled it with a gatling blow to the thing's head.
He lifted the plastron hatch of Azonia's smoldering pod and called out to her, the first time he had ever demonstrated such feeling for one of his own kind. She was lying injured inside, on the brink of unconsciousness, until she saw him and felt the light return to her.
Was she all right? he wanted to know.
She smiled slightly, even though there was nothing good to report; oh, she was unhurt, but the pod's weapons were empty. And it didn't matter, she wanted to tell him, because she had at least lived to experience the joy of battle and the knowledge that he had cared enough to come to her side.
But Khyron surprised her by ordering a retreat.
She got the pod to its feet and scooped Khyron up in its one good arm, running away with him into the dawn light, a badly beaten band of Battlepods trailing behind.
Lisa and Kyle stood silently side by side, identical scowls on their faces, while the happy reunion continued. Lisa was thinking: We must look like twins.
She wasn't aware of the female flight officer who approached her from the shuttle plane until she felt the light tap on her shoulder.
"Khyron is in full retreat," the woman reported.
Lisa glanced back at the lovers. The sun was up, and it would have made a pretty picture-the two of them embracing, the Guardian behind them against a powder-blue sky-if only Rick hadn't been a featured subject. But this sudden news had presented her with a way to break it up. After all, it was Rick's duty to go after Khyron, wasn't it. He was the best there was...
If Lisa wrestled with the idea of using her rank to come between them, she didn't show it. She turned to the woman officer and told her to notify Admiral Gloval that she was sending Commander Hunter in to mop up.
With that, she walked over to them, tapping Rick roughly on the shoulder to put a swift end to their lingering kiss. She demonstrated none of the nervous reserve Grel had shown earlier with Khyron and Azonia.
"I hope I'm not interrupting anything important, Commander, but Khyron is on the run, and Skull has been ordered to give pursuit."
"Huh?" Minmei said, as if waking from a dream.
Rick shot Lisa an angry look. "I almost didn't make it back the first time-isn't that enough for you?!"
"Are you refusing orders, mister?!" she said, raising her voice.
Rick threw his helmet to the ground. "You're darn right I'm refusing!
You want Khyron so bad, you go out and get him!"
"Fine!" Lisa shot back, squatting down to retrieve the helmet. "I'll go bring him in, and you can just go put yourself on report!"
Minmei made a startled sound, looking back and forth between them.
Rick snatched the helmet away from Lisa's grasp.
"Forget it! I've come this far-I might as well finish the job, Captain!" Lisa berated herself silently. How could I allow myself to do this to him?
She started to apologize, but he cut her off.
"It's my duty, right?!" He turned affectionately to Minmei and told her that he'd be back soon.
"I know you will," she sighed.
Lisa stood with her arms folded, her foot tapping the tarmac fitfully.
She wanted to throw up, apologize again, scream, do something!
Rick donned the "thinking cap" and made an athletic jump to the lowered nose of the Veritech. As he was snuggling down inside the cockpit, Minmei saluted and said, "I'll be waiting for you."
He returned both her smile and her salute before bringing the canopy down.
The Guardian righted itself as Rick fired up the rear thrusters, and some sort of silent communication passed between Minmei and himself: words and thoughts from the past, suddenly intertwined and confused with these renewed trusts.
Minmei stood unmoving while the Veritech initiated its launch, riding over the barren land on its own blasting carpet. But when it had reached the end of the field, she began to chase after it, shouting out Rick's name, afraid all at once that she would lose him forever.
Lisa took off after her, concerned for her safety. She saw Minmei collapse a short distance off, burying her face in her hands.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
I don't know who I want to strangle more-Lisa or her idiot flyboy. I only know that if something doesn't put a quick end to this little duet they're dancing, I'm going to get myself transferred to the factory satellite, and I'm going to see to it that Lisa Hayes comes with me.
The Collected Letters of Claudia Grant
The issue, Lisa decided afterward, was control. It had nothing to do with Minmei, Kyle, or even Rick. She couldn't bring herself to blame him no matter how much effort she put into it; she couldn't accuse him of deceit-he had been honest about his feelings for Minmei all along-lack of consideration, or outright selfishness. Nor was his behavior manipulative or controlling in any way. Damn him. That left only herself to blame, unless she could somehow pin the whole thing on Khyron!
This made her laugh: Here she was, sitting in the officer's mess feeling like the world was about to end because she and Rick had had another tiff, when Khyron was on the loose, kidnapping people, demanding the return of the SDF-1, and threatening to wipe out what little remained of the human race. But her preoccupation with the little things didn't surprise her. For what could one person do up against the bag ones? She played her part, Rick played his; all of them, Minmei included, had roles to enact. Sometimes, though, it felt as if someone else had written the lines they all delivered with such force and passion. But in the end it all came back to control: how she was going to regain control of herself.
Lisa sat there sipping at lukewarm coffee, so wrapped up in replaying dawn's events that she took no notice of Claudia's arrival.
"I thought I might find you in here," her friend said, slipping into the seat opposite her. "Why so glum, chum?"
Lisa looked up, startled and in no mood for good cheer.
"Come on," Claudia pressed. "Tell me what Rick has done now, Lisa."
"Please, Claudia..."
"Not in the mood for talk, huh? Well, honey, sometimes it clears the air...just helps to get it in the open."
Lisa loved Claudia dearly, but ever since Roy's death she seemed to have become the absolute font of optimism. Whether this was simply her way of running from reality-her path of control-Lisa had no idea. Just now she didn't feel like "clearing the air"; instead, she tossed her head back as if to shrug off her dark mood and asked Claudia what made her think she was upset.
Claudia almost smiled. "Uh, woman's intuition. And even if I'm wrong, I want you to try my prescription for pain." She produced a box of blended teas from her jacket pocket and slid it across the table. "Hot tea can do wonders for open wounds."
Indefatigable optimism and a reliance on health potions and panaceas, thought Lisa. But after a moment she surrendered.
"Is it really all that noticeable?"
"Only if someone happens to be glancing in your general direction," Claudia told her. "Or maybe to someone who's been there..."
Lisa could only shake her head.
Claudia reached out for Lisa's hand. "I know how it is...but you've got to loosen up. Stop trying to control how you feel-just tell him."
Claudia stood up.
"What am I supposed to tell him?"
>
Now Claudia shook her head. "How you feel about him, silly."
Lisa thought about it as Claudia walked off. She picked up the package of tea and began to fool-with it absently. Rick Hunter, she said to herself. This is the way I feel about you: I-I love you. Suddenly she gave the box a sort of hopeless toss. Even her inner voice was stammering! This was not going to be easy.
Mirroring the emotional state of its pilot, Skull One came in fast and furious, rocking side to side as it screeched along the Prometheus's flight
deck.
Rick was like a raw nerve just waiting to be touched. Effectively he'd been in high gear since leaving the abandoned Zentraedi base over forty-eight hours ago. For the past eight, the squadron had been scouring the countryside for signs of Khyron's forces. Beginning with the site of the surprise attack (now a place of unspeakable carnage, littered with the remains of scores of Battlepods and RDF mecha), Skull Team had traced Khyron's retreat north to yet another hastily abandoned base. Sensor readings indicated that a Zentraedi warship had been launched from the base shortly before Skull's arrival, but there was no trace of its heading or any way to determine the strength of Khyron's remaining army. Given the number of Zentraedi who had deserted the cities, the size of the ship (Zentraedi cruiser class), and the fact that Khyron was in possession of a workable sizing chamber, troop estimates ranged anywhere from one to three thousand.
Then there was Lisa to think about-the other front in this war without end. Bad enough that most of his walking life was spent following orders, but to have to take them from someone who expected to regiment his personal life as well was more than he could stand. Even the memory of Minmei's sweet embrace wasn't enough to wash away dawn's sour start.
"We'll put her away for you, Commander!" one of the ground crew said as Rick was raising the canopy.
It took Rick a second to realize that the man was talking about Skull One. He took a deep breath of fresh air and climbed from the cockpit, dead on his feet.
The ground crew chief called out to him as he was leaving. "Excuse me, sir, but Captain Hayes wants you to report to her as soon as possible."
"Did she say why?" Rick asked him. "No, sir."
Rick turned and stormed off. It was time to have a showdown with Captain Hayes.
Lisa, meanwhile, was at her station in the SDF-2 control room. She had
made up her mind to apologize to Rick, perhaps go a step further if her courage held up. Humming to herself now while she toyed with the tea package, she didn't notice Rick's vexed entry. Vanessa, at the adjacent duty station, tried to whisper a warning, but Lisa had turned and caught sight of him, somehow misreading his mood.
"Oh, hello, Rick," she said cheerfully.
He answered her by practically throwing his written report at her. "With my compliments, Captain."
Lisa's eyes went wide; she hadn't anticipated this.
"Will that be all?" he continued in the same sarcastic tone. "I don't want to take up too much of your time."
"Rick, I-"
"I said, will that be all, Captain?"
"What's the matter with you?" She raised her voice, but it came out confused-sounding.
"What's the matter with me?! I come in after chasing Khyron halfway across the continent and the first thing I hear is that I'm supposed to report to you-you think I don't understand military procedure by now, or what?!"
He was standing over her, red-faced and shaking. "If you'll just give me a chance to explain..."
"And another thing." He made a fist. "My personal life is just that-personal! D' ya understand, Captain?! I'll speak to whoever I want, whenever and wherever I want!"
So that was it, Lisa thought. He believed that she had manipulated this morning's situation for her own purposes. In other words, her motives had been transparent.
"I understand," she told him meekly.
"Like Vanessa, here, for example," Rick added suddenly, walking over to her station. "Am I right or not?"
Vanessa adjusted her glasses, glanced briefly at Lisa, and slid down in her seat, wanting no part of this. "Uh, I don't really think I'm..."
But Rick was bending over her, his hand on the back of her chair, full of
false charm. "Hey, why don't we grab a bite to eat?"
Vanessa blanched. "Please," she told him, not wanting to have to state the obvious. "As you can see, I'm still on duty..."
"So what? You can still play hooky, can't you?" Rick stole a look at Lisa; she was getting to her feet, her back to both of them.
"If you'll excuse me," Lisa said, "I think I've had enough of this." She was hurt, but at the same time she felt sorry for Rick. That he would stoop to such transparent gestures to get even with her; that he would drag her friend into it; that he was a man...
When Lisa was out of earshot, Vanessa turned sharply to Rick and told him off. "That was the worst, Hunter. I mean it."
He had an arrogant look on his face. "Oh yeah, why's that?"
Vanessa shook her head in disbelief. "You've been relying on instruments too long, flyboy. Open your eyes: Did you stop to think about how Lisa feels about you?" This was none of her business, and she knew she had no right to be speaking for Lisa, but somebody had to get this guy to wise up.
"Feels about me?" Rick was saying as if he couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You gotta be kidding-the only thing Lisa cares about is her job."
Vanessa frowned, and Rick walked off. She gave herself a moment to calm down, then went over to Kim's station to fill her in on this latest chapter in the Hayes-Hunter miniseries.
"What's Lisa's problem?" said Kim after she'd been briefed.
"She doesn't have any problem," Sammie defended her commander. "It was just a lovers' quarrel. It's none of our business."
Vanessa disagreed. "You weren't there. She loves him, but she doesn't have the courage to tell him."
"That's absolutely ridiculous!" said Kim, suddenly angry. "Why doesn't he just be a man about it and tell her how he feels?"
Vanessa gave her a quizzical look. "Has it ever occurred to you that he doesn't share the same feelings? He asked me out, you know."
"Oh, come on," Kim said, dismissing it. "He knows how she feels about
him, and he does feel the same. He's just being a stubborn idiot."
Vanessa restated her doubt. Sammie, though, had a dreamy look on her face. "Well, if I felt that way about a man, I'd come right out and tell him."
Kim turned to her and laughed. "Yeah, but you do that with almost every man you meet!" This cracked Vanessa up as well. But it didn't last long.
Kim sighed. "The only reason we're laughing is because it isn't happening to us."
Vanessa nodded. "The only other man Lisa ever loved was killed in action."
"This makes me so sad..." Sammie said tearfully.
Yeah, Vanessa thought, putting her hand on Sammie's shoulder. But what would we do for entertainment around here without Lisa and Rick? What was there in her own life-or in Kim's or Sammie's-that even approximated passion and the dream of a new start? Rico, Konda, and Bron? That was a dead end on several counts. She grew tearful herself, for all of them. For the emptiness at the center of this brave new world they had all been thrown into.
In spite of the threatening skies, Lisa had decided to walk home from the base. The clouds opened up before she had made it halfway to the New Macross burbs, drenching her instantly and chilling her to the bone. A long winter was on its way.
When the world is out of synch with your inner life, you come to think of it as a heartless, godless realm; and yet when it mirrors those thoughts and feelings, you dismiss it as pathetic fallacy.
She stood thinking this to herself in front of Rick's quarters. There were lights on inside, and once she saw his silhouette pass briefly behind the picture window permaglass. It wasn't aimless wandering that had brought her here, but she couldn't summon up the nerve to go up to the door. Rather, she had a peace offering in mind: She'd leave Claudia's tea in Rick's
mailbox, go home and phone him, and-
"Planning to drink that tea in the rain?"
All at once there was an umbrella overhead and Claudia was beside her, smiling. "Why don't you go up and knock?"
"He doesn't want to see me," Lisa told her, raising her voice above the sound of the rain.
"You've made up his mind for him, huh? Well, listen, if you're not ready to talk to him right now, why don't you come on over to my place? We'll dry off and talk some-what do you say?"
Lisa hesitated, and Claudia put the umbrella in her hand. "Well, while you're thinking about it..."
"Claudia, I..." Lisa began, but her friend was already trotting off. Lisa gave another hopeless glance toward Rick's window and followed after her.
"I've made some nice hot tea," Claudia called out from the kitchen.
Lisa was on the living room sofa towel-drying her hair. Tea sounded all right, but the chill she was feeling ran clear through to her heart. "At the risk of sounding like a pushy guest," she said when Claudia entered with the tea serving, "you wouldn't happen to have anything stronger lying around, would you?"
Claudia's eyebrows went up. "Like what?" "You hiding any wine around the house?"
A big grin appeared on her friend's handsome face. "You got it."
"Well, go get it!" Lisa said playfully. She had a low tolerance for alcohol and drugs of any sort, which was both a good and a bad thing: On the one hand, her body simply rebelled at overindulgence, a fact that kept her from turning to drugs for escape in times of stress; while on the other hand, she could count on a little going a long way-one or two drinks and inhibition was a thing of the past. A classic "cheap date," she reminded herself.
"Burgundy all right?"
"Right now I'd settle for Zentraedi zinfandel."
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