by Ivy Smoak
“I wanted to talk. Is this a good time?”
“What for? To serve with me a lawsuit? Fine. Just get it over with.” I put my wrists out for him to slap the cuffs on me. Which made no sense because that’s not how lawsuits worked. Well, maybe in pornos. But if this was a porno he’d definitely be wearing a super sexy cop uniform. And he wasn’t.
“What? No. I wanted to apologize. I was totally unprofessional. I know it’s not an excuse, but I don’t really have much experience with women.” He coughed. “Er, with examining women’s bodies. As patients. Not in a sexual way. Because I’m a pediatrician.”
I laughed and he looked super relieved.
“Ash!” called Chastity. “What the hell is taking so long? Hurry up so we can decide which of us gets to bang your stalker!”
Dr. Lyons blinked a few times. “Um, should I come back another time?”
Damn it, Chastity! She made it sound like we had a stalker tied up and we were deciding which of us would rape him. Which probably made sense to Dr. Lyons given his prior experience with me. “Ignore her.” I stepped into the hallway and shut the door behind me. “She just likes to mess with people. You should see her when the mailman comes. She always has to play the penis game.”
Dr. Lyons stared at me, completely confused.
“You know. Everyone takes turns yelling ‘penis’ and whoever yells it loudest wins.”
He laughed. “Right. I have friends like that. Anyway, I’ll cut to the chase. I wanted to tell you that I can’t be your doctor anymore.”
“You came all the way here to tell me that? Just to rub in how awkward I was?”
He lowered his eyebrows instead of responding. Which basically meant, “Hell yeah, Ash, you’re awkward AF and I want nothing to do with you.”
I was already feeling pretty low from my stalker not remembering me. And seeing Sierra’s relationship status. I didn’t need this right now. I cleared my throat. “I guess…thanks for not arresting me?” Asshole. I turned to go back inside just as Chastity opened the door.
“Where’s my pizza?” she asked. Then she smiled at Dr. Lyons and looked him up and down. “Who’s this hunky gentleman and why haven’t you invited him inside?”
“This is Dr. Lyons.”
“The Dr. Lyons?” She winked at me. “You said he was hot, but not this hot.”
Usually I would have been mortified, but Dr. Lyons was such an asshole that I didn’t really care. “Well, he just came here to tell me that he didn’t want to be my doctor anymore because I’m the most awkward human being on the face of the earth. If you want him, he’s all yours.”
Dr. Lyons cleared his throat. “I was actually coming by to ask you out to dinner. That’s why I can’t be your doctor anymore.”
Now he was just messing with me. “No thank you,” I said. Because even if he was serious, I could still barely look at him after my attempted rape. Besides, he would just cheat on me with an instamodel or a secretary or something. Did pediatricians have secretaries? No. They had nurses. And that was just as bad. Maybe worse.
“What she meant to say,” said Chastity, “is that she can’t tonight because we’re in the middle of a super awesome girls’ night. How about Saturday at 8?”
Dr. Lyons grinned from ear to ear. “Done.” He turned to me. “I’ll pick you up at 8.”
“I don’t…” I started, but Chastity pulled me inside and slammed the door.
“Ah!” she squealed. “You have a date! And he’s ridiculously hot. No wonder you tried to rape him.”
“Why did you do that? I can’t go on a date with him. Like you just said, I tried to rape him. I can’t be trusted around strangers. You know this.”
“Guess he liked it.”
Huh. Maybe he did. The annoyance of seeing Sierra’s relationship status coupled with the sheer embarrassment of seeing Dr. Lyons had clouded my judgment. It was just now sinking in that he stopped by because he had a crush on me. I couldn’t prevent the smile that spread over my face.
“Congrats on your new boyfriend,” said Chastity. “Now that you have him you won’t be needing Tanner or that Society membership. I’ll be happy to take both off your hands.”
“He’s not my boyfriend yet.”
“Who’s not?” asked Madison.
“My doc…” I stopped mid-sentence when I saw what Madison was wearing. She had changed into a floral pantsuit, pulled her hair into a tight bun, and drawn a beard on herself with a marker.
She struck a manly power pose.
“What the hell am I looking at?” asked Chastity.
“I’m ready to take one for the team and cut my hair to see how short it can get before you can no longer put it in a bun.”
“So why the suit and beard?” I asked.
“I had to get in character.”
“Did you though?”
“Well I have good news,” said Chastity. “Ash has a date with her doctor, so now Tanner is all mine.”
“Whoa whoa whoa. No way. If Tanner is my stalker then I still have dibs. No way I’m giving up a billionaire for a pervy doctor.” Not that he was the pervy one. That was clearly all me. And he was pretty hot…
Chastity pouted. “Not fair.”
“What’s not fair is that Joe and Sierra are officially an item.” I pulled out my cellphone to show them. I cringed as the two of them stared down at my worst nightmare. Joe moving on with his life. While I just stalked people and acted rude to nice handsome doctors.
Chastity gave me a big hug. “I’m sorry. The good news is that there’s no way it will last.”
“Why do you say that?” I wasn’t sure why that made me so hopeful. But I just so badly wanted Joe to be more miserable than me.
“Come on…why would a girl who looks like Sierra be with Joe? Clearly she just wants his money.”
“You think so?” I asked. Wait, was that a burn on me?
Chastity nodded. “I know so. You’re definitely going to find love, Ash. You deserve it.”
“So I can have Tanner?” I asked.
“Ha, nice try. Tell you what…tomorrow is Thursday.”
“So?”
“So that’s when you always see your stalker. And when the Society dates are. So either you’ll have a date with him, or we’ll kidnap him outside One57 and make him tell us everything.”
“Or maybe just approach him and ask him nicely?”
Chastity shrugged. “Not quite as fun, but okay.”
My heart started beating faster. I had been so distracted trying to figure out if Tanner and Ryder were the same person that I’d forgotten all about going on another Society date tomorrow. When would the card appear? What would the date be? And most importantly…would Ryder be there?
Chapter 24 - Clause Fourteen
Thursday
My second day of work got off to a better start than the first. I didn’t flash anyone on the elevator, and I was wearing normal clothes. But the actual work part was unbearable because I couldn’t seem to focus.
Every five minutes I kept checking my phone for a Society invitation. And then I’d look over my shoulder to see if Tanner had arrived. And then I’d hop on Facebook to see if Joe and Sierra had switched their Facebook statuses back to SINGLE (spoiler alert - they hadn’t). And then I’d check again for a Society invitation. And then…well, you get the idea.
Before I knew it, it was already lunchtime.
“So what’s the plan for tonight?” asked Chastity as she tore into some Chinese takeout.
I shrugged and took a bite of orange chicken. “No invitations yet.”
“How do you know? You’ve been at your desk all day.”
“I’ve been checking the app.”
Chastity shook her head. “That’s not how invitations come. Clause 14. Wish invitations will be delivered via discreet black envelopes. Once an envelope is received, the Member will accept or decline the invitation via the app.”
“Do you have the entire contract memorized?”
She shrugged. “What? It seemed important.”
“Uh, guys,” said Madison. Her marker-beard hadn’t come off very well, so she was sporting what looked like five o’clock shadow. “I think this might be what you’re waiting for.” She pulled a black and gold envelope out of the takeout bag.
“Those sneaky little dildos,” said Chastity as she snatched it out of Madison’s hand.
We gathered around as Chastity opened it.
“Hey girl,” she read. “Get ready for a night out on the town. XOXO Frankie. P.S. Wear something that’s easy to take off.”
“Well that wasn’t really what I was hoping for.” I drowned my disappointment with a huge bite of eggroll. I just wanted to see Ryder again. Or Tanner. Or whatever name he was going by today. Why did they keep making me hang out with Frankie? At least she wasn’t actually in the FBI.
“Frankie was a woman, right?” asked Chastity.
I nodded.
“It seems like she’s into you.”
Madison shrugged. “Maybe you should give her a try.”
“Yeah,” agreed Chastity. “At least she wouldn’t cheat on you with an instamodel. Or her secretary.”
Madison shot her a look. “Why do you say that? Women are every bit as capable as men at harassing their secretaries.”
“Female secretaries?” asked Chastity. “Or male secretaries? Because if it’s male secretaries, then I’m all for it.” She bit her lip. “The things I’d love to do with a photocopier and a pair of handcuffs…”
“What do handcuffs have to do with a secretary fantasy?” I asked. “You know what, I don’t want to know.” I’m already rapey enough without Chastity’s crazy ideas. “I feel like we’re getting off-topic. We need to figure out what this date card means.” Because if it was a girl date, that wasn’t my cup of tea. I wanted a tall glass of Ryder.
Chastity smoothed her skirt and tried to regain her composure. “Right. I think the card is obvious. You and Frankie are definitely gonna go clubbing.”
“And get naked?”
“Maybe. It is the Society that we’re talking about. But no, I think the part about wearing something easy to take off is probably just because she’s gonna find you a hot man at the end of the night.”
“I don’t want just any hot man. I want Ryder.” I pulled out my phone and opened the Society app. RSVP was now an option. How did they know I got the invitation? Chastity was right - they really were sneaky little dildos. I clicked RSVP:
Night Out
Thursday, April 18, 8:30 p.m.
11th and W 51st
New York, NY 10019
“Hey, that’s my address!” I said.
“Not much of a night out if it’s happening at your apartment,” scoffed Madison.
“It actually sounds perfect. Maybe they’re just going to deliver Ryder right to my front door.” Hopefully Homeless Rutherford doesn’t lick him before I get a chance to.
“Can’t you get more details once you accept?” asked Chastity. Her encyclopedic knowledge of the Society contract and app was impressive. And suspicious. Was she secretly a member?
I clicked “Accept” and then navigated to the wish details. I read it aloud: “Raven Black. You recently got divorced and you’re seeking a fresh start.”
“So you’re just you again,” said Madison.
“Yup. Looks like it.”
“Whatever,” said Chastity. “What matters is how we’re going to use this date to determine that Tanner and Ryder are two different people. #ThatBoyIsMine.”
“Or that they’re the same person,” I suggested.
“Yeah, whatever. Here’s what I propose. Ash, you go on the date and see if Ryder’s part of it. Madison, you wait outside One57 to see if he walks out and gets into his Rolls Royce. And I’ll go to Tanner’s office to keep tabs on him. If we catch them in two places at once, then it’ll prove they’re two different people.”
I tried to think of a plan that wouldn’t involve Chastity possibly flirting with Tanner, but I came up blank. “Alright, let’s do it.”
Chapter 25 - Odegaard Gangbang
Thursday
I glanced down at my phone. 7:55. Almost go time. But the plan was not off to a great start.
Tanner had been in meetings all day, so Chastity had been forced to just wait in the Rhodes VC lobby. Then when he left his office around 6, she failed miserably at following. So now she was camped outside of One57 with Madison. I was terrified that she would walk up to him and confront him. Or seduce him. I cringed at the thought. Ryder was mine!
Or at least, I wanted him to be. I just didn’t know how to make it happen. Our date had been wonderful and it felt like he was into me, but why would he like me? I wasn’t like those models at spin class. Or his slutty secretary. I pulled her picture up on my phone. Yeah, I had saved it. Don’t judge me. She was tall and had impossibly big boobs for her impossibly skinny waist. I couldn’t compete with that. Maybe that was why he hadn’t kissed me the other night. He had kept calling me cute. I needed to spice it up.
I rummaged through my drawers. None of my clothes seemed right for the occasion. What was good for clubbing and also easy to take off? I pulled my tightest dress over my head. It was a sexy little red number that I’d bought for my first Valentine’s Day with Joe. And somehow it still fit. Kind of.
I got it over my shoulders, but then it got stuck around my boobs thanks to the mega-pushup bra I was wearing. For a second I couldn’t breathe. My life flashed before my eyes. I pictured the police showing up and finding me on the ground half-naked. But before that all happened, the dress tore in half. Son of a bitch! It must have been made of the cheapest fabric in the world.
“Eh, it would have been too hard to get off anyway,” I said to no one in particular. Really I was just trying to make myself feel better about literally tearing a dress in half. It was the damn muscle weight. I still hadn’t figured out if the protein before a workout was a good idea. Maybe I just had to give up protein completely…God no. That sounded terrible. I’d take the splitting dresses over no protein any day.
I eventually settled on a flared skirt and a tank top. I finished it off with the pair of white heels that I’d worn to my high school graduation. The two-inch heel was soooo sexy. At least, it had felt that way when I bought them in freaking high school.
My phone buzzed. 8:01. I looked at the text from Madison. There were no words. Just a picture of Ryder ducking into his Rolls Royce.
Ah! It’s happening! Tonight was the night. I was going to see Ryder again. Or maybe I should just not go. I did have a crap-ton of work to get done if we were going to finish those new ad campaigns by tomorrow afternoon. Missing a deadline was just as bad as being late, which was my second biggest fear.
No. I shook my head. You got this, Ash. I refused to let myself wallow in misery while Joe and Sierra lived happily ever after. I was going to get my happily ever after too, and I was going to get it with a billionaire. Besides, I only had to complete my three wishes before I got to cross it off my to-do list and nominate Chastity to be part of the Society. Three chances to make Tanner fall in love with me. Or Ryder. Or whatever his name is.
I put on my black wig, fastened a black bracelet to my wrist, and headed outside before I could change my mind.
A black Rolls Royce limo pulled up right at 8:30. OMG! Ryder came to get me! The driver got out and opened the door for me. My heart was beating out of my chest. What would I say to him? Would I act natural? Would I playfully be mad at him for leaving me alone after our first date and then pretending not to know who I was at the meeting?
Apparently I’d do neither, because Frankie was the only one in the back of the limo. I should have known because the driver wasn’t the little man in the butler’s outfit that usually drove Ryder around. Crap.
“Hey Raven!” she said, handing me a glass of champagne and giving me an awkward seated hug.
I took a big sip.
“How was your date with Ryder?”
“Kind of amazing. Did you know he was gonna pull that whole FBI thing?”
She looked confused. “I have no idea what FBI thing you’re talking about, but I warned you he was dangerous.”
That doesn’t answer my question. “He didn’t seem dangerous. He was actually quite a gentleman.”
“But not in bed, I bet?” She winked.
I took another sip of champagne. “We actually didn’t do that. We just talked.”
“Right,” said Frankie. “Of course.”
She definitely did not believe me. “What can you tell me about him?”
“I don’t really know him. I’ve just…heard things.”
“Like?”
“It’s not really my place to say. It wouldn’t be fair to either of you for me to poison things with rumors.”
“But you didn’t mind poisoning things by telling me that he had rusty pipes and asbestos in his walls.”
“Maybe I was just telling you what you wanted to hear. It seemed like you have a thing for bad boys.”
“I guess I do. I mean, my ex-husband left me for a woman he barely knew.” I downed the rest of my champagne. “And now they’re Facebook-official.”
“There’s a difference between bad boys and bad people. And your ex sounds like the latter.”
“Which one is Ryder?” I asked.
“I’m not sure. But I’ll let you know if I find anything out. In the meantime…” She poured me another glass of champagne. “Get ready to have the night of your life.”
“Doing what?”
“The best thing you can do when you’ve just suffered a bad breakup.”
“Oh God.” My heart started pounding. “I knew this was gonna be a gangbang.”
Frankie spit out her champagne. “Wow. What? Is that how you usually get over breakups?”
I laughed awkwardly. “Ha. No. Of course not. I know that what we’re really doing is…”
“Shopping!” she yelled, hoisting her glass into the air.