by Ryan Kirk
“You know he was responsible for the death of someone I cared for.”
Even here, imprisoned, Takako couldn’t believe the justifications the men around her used for killing each other. “Your violence only begets more violence. Now that you have killed him, his student will come for you. All of you create a cycle there is no escape from. For as strong as you all are, you are too weak to find a different path.”
Orochi nodded. “That may be true. Some would argue we are fated to it.”
“A person makes their fate. They can always choose a different path. The paths that doom you are of your own choosing.”
Orochi leaned back against the door of her cell. “You are intelligent. I have respect for Shigeru’s boy and the power he possesses. I see the company he keeps is indicative of his quality as well. For what it is worth, I am sorry it has come to this.”
He paused and then continued. “I have come to offer you an option, a way out.”
Takako’s heart leapt for a moment, unable to think of what such a way might entail.
He motioned for her to calm down. “It is not what you think. I am honor-bound to an oath I made to Lord Akira. You will die today, have no doubt about it. What I come to offer you today is a quick death, a warrior’s death. General Nori is taken with alcohol and has not been able to shake the demon which poisons his mind. He is literally mad with grief over the death of his son, and I suspect you will become the victim of that anger unless you take action.
“I consider myself to be an honorable man. To protect his realm, Lord Akira ordered your death, and I shall see that through as I promised him. But torture and whatever Nori has planned for you this afternoon, is not honorable. It is the product of a weak mind. I will take your head, right here and now, if you wish it.”
Takako’s stomach felt like it had dropped from her body. To choose death over torture seemed like the worst two options she could choose between. She thought of her father, stuck between selling his daughter and losing everything. There had to be a way out of this cycle. She had to hold out hope that Ryuu would come for her. She had to hold on and be strong. He would be here before that happened.
Orochi shook his head. “I sense your hope. The boy will come. Of that I have little doubt. He fights as an honorable man must. He will come after you, but he will have to wait until nightfall. There is no way to approach this fort by day. There are too many archers, and even with his skills he will need the cover of night to reach the fort. By then, it may be too late.”
Takako wanted to call him a liar. She imagined how good it would feel to throw his words back in his face just as Ryuu strode through the door to her cell to rescue her. It was an attractive, beautiful dream, but she recognized the ring of truth in Orochi’s voice. He believed in Ryuu, but he also knew Ryuu was smart and would be forced to wait until nightfall to attack. So her choice was before her. One day of torture or immediate death.
Despite her desire to lay down and cry, she held her head up. She wanted life, and she chose hope. She couldn’t afford not to hope, not here. If she needed to survive torture, survive she would. It was better than giving up.
She didn’t have to answer. Orochi read the decision in her face and in her bearing. He gave her a short bow as a measure of respect. “I did not think the consort of a warrior of Ryuu’s strength would be weak, but it seemed appropriate for me to make the offer. I hope you are not offended. From one warrior to another, I offer you my respect. May your journey to the Great Cycle be sweet.”
Takako barely managed to keep her head up as he left the room. She didn’t have the energy to tell him she wasn’t Ryuu’s consort. As soon as he left she collapsed in a heap, her body unable to support her any longer. The time in her small cell seemed to inflate and slow down until each footstep of the guards felt like an entire cycle had passed. She lost any objective measure of time.
When Nori came, Takako felt like she had suffered an entire lifetime waiting. She moved slowly, reacted slowly. The air around her seemed as heavy as water as she attempted to struggle, attempted to escape her captors.
Nori brought her into a different room with a high table. She was thrown onto the table without ceremony, and she could feel the leather straps being tied tight around her wrists and ankles. Her clothes were ripped off, and she was left naked on the table, unable to move.
Takako was prepared to encounter lust, to experience the desire of the men who saw her. She had become well enough used to her body to expect it. She didn’t expect Nori’s reaction, or lack thereof. There was no arousal in his face. He stood in a corner and looked at her. He was not excited and made no move to take her by force, despite her vulnerability.
It was more disconcerting to realize he was just watching her, examining her. She wasn’t an object of desire so much as an animal to him. Something to be taught the error of its ways. Takako could almost feel him disconnect from his humanity, and that scared her more than anything had before.
The fear in her body melted her down. Even if she hadn’t been tied to the table she was confident she wouldn’t be able to move. She had experienced the paralysis of true fear before, but nothing that had ever permeated through every single part of her body.
The first feelings of pain were almost a relief from the fear. Nori had brought with him only a few tools, but his experience was evident. Takako at first tried closing her eyes, but it was worse not knowing.
Nori didn’t hurry, working alternately with an extremely sharp knife and a hammer. He always took his time. The pain and the waiting were unlike anything Takako had ever experienced. She had been burned and injured before, but she had never known the world of pain that existed beyond that: white-hot, agonizing, and unending. She had resolved to be strong, but that resolution was broken within moments. She cried for mercy, screamed in pain until her throat was raw. She would have told him anything to make him stop. But he continued without emotion.
Twice she passed out from the pain and twice Nori brought her back with smelling salts. Then he would begin again, slowly, building the pain up to yet another unbearable crescendo. The third time she passed out Nori did not wake her up, and she slipped into the blissful realm of unconsciousness.
When she awoke she saw through the open door that evening was beginning to fall. She didn’t even bother trying to move. Something, deep within her, had finally snapped. The hope which had sustained her for so long, the belief everything would be okay, was gone. She didn’t have the mental strength to catalog her injuries, but some part of her knew her body would never heal from this, would never work again.
She knew both her legs were broken as was one arm and probably a couple of the bones in her torso. Skin was missing from small sections of her body, including her face and breasts. If she did survive the day she would never have her beauty again, would never be able to walk normally. Her dreams of making her own way disappeared. She did not know everything Nori had done between her legs, but she knew she would never enjoy making love.
It was the never part that got to her. She would never do many of the things she had dreamed of. That hurt more than the physical pain itself. Some part of her had always believed everything would turn out. Setbacks and challenges were temporary and could be overcome. But what had happened to her ended that. Even if Ryuu rescued her, she wouldn’t be the same.
A single tear rolled down her cheek and shattered upon the table as it dropped from her face. Little droplets had spread out from the point of impact. There wasn’t anything left.
Takako figured out the truth. She had heard of people who reached this stage in their lives, but the thought of getting here had always terrified her. Aging had never scared her, but the process of giving up, of not having anything to look forward to froze her heart. She believed in the Great Cycle, perhaps now more than ever, because it was the only hope she had remaining.
She heard slow footsteps outside her door and closed her eyes. If she could feign unconsciousness, perhaps they would just
let her lie here for a little while longer. That was all she wanted. Just to lie there and let the darkness overcome her.
Somehow she knew from the footsteps. He moved like Ryuu and Moriko. She imagined she could sense the shock from him as he looked over her and cataloged her injuries. She knew he didn’t look at her lustfully, not because of her injuries, but because he saw her as a person. It was refreshing, in a way, but she still just wanted to be left alone, to be allowed to sleep once and for all.
“Your sleep will come soon enough. But not now, and not by my hand.”
If Takako could have summoned any movement to spit any words of hate out at him she would have, but she had nothing left but resignation.
“There’s no need. You hate me, and with good reason. I wish you could rejoin the Great Cycle without malice in your heart towards me, but I understand if that’s not possible. Take comfort. I sense the end of this journey is near. I cannot sense him, but I can sense this world beginning to change. We are on the verge of a new age. I know he will come tonight. I will challenge him, and I do not know who will win. He is stronger than Shigeru, but I suspect he never told you that. I will let him see you before we meet.”
Takako imagined herself nodding to Orochi’s statement, and he seemed to sense her agreement. It was nice not having to physically move to communicate.
“I will leave and shut the door behind me. You have my word I will guard it until he comes for you. Nori will not be allowed back in. Your suffering is almost over.”
Takako once again imagined agreeing, and once again it was enough for Orochi. He left, and as the door shut behind him all the remaining light faded, leaving her in complete darkness.
Takako closed her eyes and could feel the life in her blood draining out of her. She was ready. She wanted nothing more than to die quietly without hope.
28
Moriko sat as still and quiet as a statue as the sun rose high in the sky. She had to compensate for Ryuu’s inability to do anything but pace with his hand on his sword, ready to cut down anything that moved. Someone needed to be the calm one. Ryuu was angry, scared, determined, and uncertain. He wasn’t thinking straight. He couldn’t hold onto a single thought long enough to follow it to its conclusion. He was jumping back and forth faster than a jackrabbit. He was a danger not just to himself but to her as well.
A part of her went out to him. She couldn’t imagine his pain. But if he didn’t focus he wouldn’t last. Moriko didn’t suspect an attack. Nori and Orochi’s strategy was simple, obvious, and effective. They weren’t going to come out and lose men in the woods. They would determine the field of battle by waiting for them to come in. It was a significant advantage. Moriko was tempted to just walk away from it all.
As she watched Ryuu, Moriko allowed her thoughts to wander. He wasn’t the only one involved. She was reaching the point of no return. If she went with Ryuu on the rescue her course would be set.
She didn’t know where she stood. She wanted to believe her situation was different than Ryuu’s, that Lord Akira and Orochi wouldn’t hunt her down the same way they had Shigeru and his student. She was only an escaped monk, far less dangerous than a full-fledged nightblade. She wanted to believe she could walk away without consequence.
The rational part of her mind knew it was a lie. Orochi and Akira had no reason to view her as anything other than another nightblade who posed a danger to the realm. Her only chance to convince them otherwise would be to go straight to Orochi and plead with him. He knew her well, perhaps he would believe her.
It would be a tough sell. Orochi knew of her disdain for the monasteries. It would be difficult for him to believe she hadn’t some choice in the matter. Perhaps he wouldn’t believe her at all and would kill her where she stood.
Joining Ryuu on his attempt would firmly place her in Ryuu’s camp, and she wasn’t sure she wanted that either. She liked Ryuu but she wanted to maintain her distance. If she wasn’t close to anybody, if she wasn’t responsible to anybody, she wouldn’t suffer like Ryuu did.
He was an interesting man, not just because he was a nightblade in a world where they were nearly extinct, but because of his innocence. His emotions were so raw and pure. He wasn’t cynical or disillusioned. He saw the world as it was and sought to change it, he thought he could change it.
He was also immature. There was clearly a relationship between Takako and Ryuu, but he had the gall to approach her. She didn’t compare to Takako at all. Takako was a good woman and beautiful beyond compare. Her skin was smooth and soft, unlike the scars which crisscrossed Moriko’s body from her time in front of the Abbot. Takako knew how to bring pleasure to a man, a set of skills Moriko had never even imagined having the time to learn in her situation in the monastery.
But Ryuu was also attracted to Moriko, and Moriko was cynical. She didn’t believe Ryuu was malicious. He just found himself with two women he liked and didn’t know how to act. He would have to choose, but didn’t. He was too young to realize he couldn’t have it all.
Moriko’s reverie was interrupted by Ryuu stopping his pacing right in front of her. “We need to leave now. She could die at any moment!”
“She’s not going to die.”
“You don’t know that, don’t say that,” Ryuu spat back, his emotions almost literally carrying him away.
“I do. She’s bait. I don’t know if they were searching for her or found her by chance, but Nori and Orochi are using her to draw you in. They get to choose the ground, they get to set all the traps and all the kill spaces they want. Bait is no good if it’s dead. They want you dead, and for that to happen she needs to be alive. So stop worrying.”
Ryuu shook his head at the last comment, but kept his silence. He knew she was right, it was just difficult for him to admit it. She softened her tone.
“Look, I know the waiting is horrible, but we have to wait until nightfall. We both know there’s no way we can cross through that grassy patch without becoming a shooting target. We need the cover of night to make our advance.”
Ryuu collapsed in exasperation. “I know. I know they will keep her alive. But it doesn’t stop me from wanting to go in and get her.” He made no effort to hide the tears that started streaming from his eyes. He looked up at Moriko. “They could still hurt her.”
Moriko didn’t have anything to say. That statement was most likely true.
“Did you know all this was my fault? When I first met Takako, Shigeru had hired her to teach me how to interact with women and girls, how to act in society. Nothing more. We became friends. When she was taken, I didn’t feel like I had any choice. I had to stop it from happening. But look at all the pain it’s caused. Her entire family is dead and now she’s captured, enduring whatever they have in store for her, all because I tried to stop things. Shigeru is dead. All because of me. I should know to leave well enough alone.”
Moriko’s heart went out to Ryuu in that moment. “It’s not your fault. Yes, many people are dead, but that doesn’t make your actions wrong. You did the best you could with what you knew. The ones who are responsible are the ones who swung the sword. Not you.”
Moriko’s decision was made. “And I will help you. But you have to know something. I will not help you in any fight against Orochi.”
Ryuu looked up, rage flashing in his eyes.
Moriko stepped back. She had never considered that Ryuu hadn’t anticipated her dilemma. She assumed he would have thought it through. She regained her confidence and returned his stare with all the willpower she could muster.
“I understand he killed Shigeru, and I’m sorry for the pain he caused you. But you are forgetting two things about him.”
Ryuu’s gaze pierced her like a blade.
Moriko stepped forward, hands relaxed at her side.
“First, I can’t believe Orochi is an evil man. He is intimidating, scary, and unapproachable, maybe even misguided. But he is not a bad man. He disdained the monastery and its systems, and to my knowledge he has never brok
en his word. I will not be responsible for helping kill a decent man.”
Ryuu’s face was a mask of anger, but he made no move against her.
“Second, Orochi was a teacher and a mentor to me. If not for him I would have been killed at the monastery many cycles ago. He was the one who trained me as a nightblade. He was the one who made me as I am today. I will not attack the man who did that for me, even if I disagree with his actions.”
Moriko had underestimated the depth of Ryuu’s emotion. He drew his sword and Moriko knew she was no match for him. His speed was incredible. He had guarded his intent well, and she never sensed it coming. She couldn’t even react before he had his blade to her throat.
The cold steel bit into her flesh, but she refused to move, refused to show fear, even when Ryuu spoke softly in her ear, his voice full of menace. “You are talking about the man who killed my father.”
She looked Ryuu straight in the eyes. “I know. And you are talking about killing mine.”
It was exactly what he needed to hear. Ryuu’s eyes went wide, and he deflated as if he had been punched in the stomach.
Ryuu couldn’t find his words. He looked up at Moriko, eyes filling with tears, and Moriko could see he was at the end of his rope. He had done everything he could to protect everyone he loved, and it was all slipping away.
“I’m. . . I’m so sorry.” Ryuu turned and started shuffling away, his body boneless as it slumped down against a tree.
Moriko didn’t know how to react, but Ryuu needed help. If he was going to go into the fort in this mental condition, Orochi would destroy him. In his current state, Orochi might not even have to do the work. A child with a stick and a grudge could probably kill Ryuu right now.
Moriko went to him, sat down next to him and cradled his head against her chest as he sobbed. It was the first time she had held a man. She embraced him, emotions flooding her senses as well.