It’s Complicated Part 2
Copyright © 2016 Sophia Latriece All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the written permission of the publisher, Sophia Latriece Publishing
Six weeks had passed since Jake’s ‘accident’, and needless to say Darrin and I were still not married. Things had actually gotten even more complicated than they were before. That night kept playing over and over in my head; like a broken record. It’s definitely one that I’ll never forget. I had never seen Darrin like that before. His tone, his body language; I didn’t know who that man was. To be honest, I didn’t want to know. I couldn’t even talk to him. I embraced him as we sat on the floor in the chapel. It was all that I knew to do at the moment. I was too scared to ask him what was wrong. I guess I didn’t want to know the answer. I had already drawn my own conclusion anyway. At the time, however, I wasn’t ready to actually hear the truth.
There I was, consoling the man that I was in love with, while waiting to hear the fate of the man who held my heart. Talk about a mess. This situation had definitely gotten way out of hand. I didn’t know when and I surely didn’t know how, but, I knew that I would have to make a decision. Which also meant that I had to come clean with Darrin about Jake and I. I couldn’t bear the thought of someone losing their life over something so innocent.
The events that have taken place over these last few weeks have been pretty interesting to say the least. Of course, things are still very complicated. Especially with this new found information that I’ve received. Man oh man. It’s like life for me is repeating itself. I’m confident that everything will work out. It has to. I’m looking forward to my new life with my family. I know it’s going to take some work and I’m ready for the challenge.
I am Kameria Jai Lawson and welcome back to my Complicated life.
1
I was kneeling on the chapel floor in the hospital praying for, my fiancé, because I’d gotten a call that he was in a terrible accident. While I was crying out to Jesus, said fiancé taps me on the shoulder. I looked at him and didn’t recognize the person kneeling next to me. He pulled me into him, hugging me tight. I expressed to him that the nurse said he was in surgery. He corrected me and tells me that he is not the one who was in an accident, rather, my ‘man’, as he called him; referring to my friend Jake.
I was petrified. One because of Darrin’s demeanor. I had never seen him this way before. I had seen him upset. I had even seen him go off on someone, but, what I saw that night was on another level. Two, because he referred to Jake as my man. This confused me because I didn’t know if he meant in a literal since or a figurative since. Given the situation with Jake and I, if it was literal I was in some deep, deep, stuff.
Because of the way he was acting, and given the fact that he called Jake my man, I automatically assumed that this was his doing. But Darrin wasn’t that type of person. I wanted to know how he knew what was going on, but I was too afraid of what his answer might be so I chose not to say a word. At least not then and not there. I held him, and comforted him, because, I believed that’s what he needed at the time.
To keep down the suspicion of what may have or may not have happened, I convinced Darrin to go home being that the hospital staff would be looking for me. As much as I didn’t want to believe that Darrin was the cause of Jake being there, it was the only thing that made sense. How else could he have known where I was and the circumstance that surrounded my being there. Soon after Darrin left, the attending physician sent for me to let me know that Jake was out of surgery. They had stabilized him, but, he was still unconscious. I begged them to let me see him just for a little while.
My heart dropped down to my knees when I saw him lying in that bed with all those tubes in him. In that moment, I couldn’t imagine him not being in my life. Yes, the way he came back was wrong, but, he was back and I didn’t want to lose him. Especially not like this. I tried calling Kyle again and he still wasn’t answering. I was finally able to get in touch with my dad who called Jake’s parents and I left the hospital before they arrived.
On the way home, I prayed that God would give me the words to say to Darrin. I was hoping that he would be asleep by the time I got there, but, I wanted to be prepared just in case. I sat in the garage for a few minutes to clear my head. I didn’t know what state of mind he would be in; if he would be angry, nonchalant, aggressive. I wasn’t sure. The person that I was walking into the house to was a stranger to me, and I didn’t know how to deal with him.
Darrin was sitting on the sofa chair in the bedroom with his hands on his head, wearing only a bath towel when I walked in. The house was pitch black. It didn’t feel like home. Not the home that we were building together. I stood in front of him and placed my hand on his head. He looked up at me with the most sorrowful eyes. He wrapped his arms around my waist, placed his head in my belly and cried like a baby. This was the first time that I had seen him cry. I mean really cry. This person couldn’t harm a fly; could he? Why would he be crying like this if he had nothing to do with it? Still I didn’t say a word. I was sure of my assumptions for the time being. He needed me and I was going to be there for him no matter what.
When I woke up the next morning, Darrin was not in the bed. He had moved back to the sofa chair and was sitting there; staring at me. Given the circumstance, I didn’t know whether to get my stuff and run or just call 911. I got up, walked over to him, and sat in his lap. He put one hand around my waist, and put out his other hand gesturing for me to put my hand in his. I put my left hand in his right hand. He lifted my hand and looked at my ring.
“When I asked you to marry me, I meant it”, he started, “I have never been so in love with anyone in my life. I trust you more than I trust myself because you’ve been nothing but loyal to me. You always have my back. You’re my baby, Kamerai. I love you. Did you really think that I wouldn’t check up on that nigga? You go to New York on some mystery trip, come back acting strange, and then your old childhood friend shows up out of the blue on a business trip and wants to take you to dinner. That’s bull, man. I’m not saying that you did or didn’t do anything with him in New York. Honestly, I don’t even want to know. If you did, take it to the grave with you. What I do know, is that you have been with him at least once because you were pregnant by him.”
I was speechless. I knew I was wrong. However, I decided to take his advice about taking it to my grave. He said he didn’t want to know, so, I didn’t tell him. After gathering my thoughts carefully, I finally spoke up.
“Baby”, I said, “I’m not sure if I want to know, but, I have to ask. What happened last night? Did you….”
“Did I what”, he cut me off, “Did I shoot him? Hell naw, Kam, you know me better than that. Yeah, I wanted to, but, I ain’t about killing nobody. How could you even think I did something like that”?
“Well, how did you know what happened? You never returned my calls, so, I know I didn’t tell you. How did you know that happened and that I would be there”?
“It was Rico Kam. Apparently him and dude had an altercation one time before. We were riding and I was telling him about the situation. Man we was high, baby, I’m not gonna lie. I was pissed. It was either smoke or come put my hands on you and I would never put my hands on you so, I smoked a blunt. Or two. I was just joking about what I would do if I saw him. Next thing I know, we spotted dude leaving the club. Rico followed him to the interstate and went crazy. I’ve seen Rico do some stupid stuff, but, not like that. Rico hit that powder and turned into somebody else. I just hope he ain’t dead, man. I don’t wish death on nobody”.
“So, what are you gonna do Dee? I know Rico is your cousin, but, what he did was wrong.
And not only did he put Jake’s life in danger, he put yours in danger. And possibly mine. I was the first person they called, so, I know they’re not just gonna let this go. Baby, why didn’t you just talk to me. We talk about everything, Darrin. Good or bad. Yes, I saw him in New York, but, in my defense, I honestly didn’t know it was him until I got there. I was going to tell you; I just didn’t know how to explain that my best friend, who also happened to be my ex-boyfriend, who I was also pregnant by, and had a miscarriage, is actually the client that I went to see in New York”.
He motioned for me to get up, walked into the bathroom, and closed the door. I was relieved that he wasn’t the one who actually did it, but I was also pissed because from the sound of it, he had no plans of turning his cousin in. Was I wrong for thinking that way? At the end of the day, right is right.
I peeked through the bathroom door to see what Darrin was doing. I wanted to make sure the coast was clear before I walked in. He was in the shower. I stood in the doorway admiring him as the water ran down his chocolate coated skin, hitting every single part of him. As much as I wanted to go there, I knew it wasn’t the time (shrugs). I turned to go back out and I heard Darrin call my name.
“So, Kamerai. Who is Kammie”, he asked.
“I’m Kammie, Darrin”, I sighed.
“And how long has he had your name tattooed on his arm”?
“I’m not sure. I saw it for the first time in New York, so, I’m guessing sometime after we lost touch”.
“Do you love him”.
“We were very close at one point in life. We had a tight bond. We were best friends. He was my first, Darrin. But, that was in the past and right now, today, I’m in love with you. I am going to marry you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you”.
“Oh really”.
“Yes, really, Darrin. What are you implying”?
“Just close the door behind you”.
“No, Darrin, talk to me”, I said making my way into the shower, fully clothed.
“Kamerai, get out my shower”.
“Why won’t you talk to me. If you’re mad, say you’re mad. Just talk to me. Are you mad”?
“Of course, I’m mad. What else am I supposed to be”?
“Be mad, Dee, but don’t push me away. Don’t shut me out. Talk to me”.
“Kameria, get out the shower”.
I obliged. I undressed out of my wet clothes, dried off and went into the bedroom to change. While I was getting dressed, I noticed my phone ringing. It was the hospital calling. As much as I loved Jake, my house was more important and it was completely out of order. All my attention, energy and time would be solely on Darrin. At least for now.
2
As long as Darrin and I had known each other, we had never not talked about anything. If we had a disagreement, which was not often, we always talked it through. Yes, this was different given the circumstance, but, we should have still been able to talk about it. At least I had hoped so.
I finally got in touch with Kyle. He had left his phone at his restaurant and didn’t get my messages until the next morning. He and my dad had gone to the hospital to visit Jake who at that time was still unconscious. My dad was always very fond of Jake. He stayed around the house so much as a kid that he was like part of the family. He would always say, “That boy’s going places”. I think it hurt him more than it hurt me when we broke up; lost touch rather.
I ended up meeting dad and Kyle at Applebee’s for lunch. My dad wasn’t acting like himself. He’s usually very upbeat, laughing and joking around. He seemed so sad. I knew he cared for Jake like a son, but, there was something else going on that he wasn’t saying. I told them what had happened with Darrin and I. Kyle was more anxious to know if I told him that I’d slept with Jake more than anything else. He was adamant that I kept that little detail to myself. I intentionally left out the part about Rico being the one who shot Jake. I wasn’t ready to reveal that information. Not yet.
The whole time Kyle and I were sitting there talking, my dad just sat there quiet. His body was there with us, but, his mind was somewhere else.
I asked my dad to walk me to my car when we were leaving. He did, but, I could tell that he was hesitant.
“There’s something you’re not telling me dad”, I said.
“I knew the whole time, Ladybug”, he replied.
“Knew what, daddy”?
“I sent you to him. I figured you all had some things to work out before you got married. I didn’t think it would turn out like this though. I’m sorry, baby. This is my fault”.
“I’m confused daddy. What are you talking about”?
“Jacob reached out to me to help with his business and I thought it would be a good idea if you were the one who worked on the account. I know it was wrong, but, I wanted to make sure that you were making the right choice about your future”.
“So, wait. You mean to tell me that you intentionally sent me to New York to be with Jake; knowing that I’m about to be married. Daddy, no”.
“I know, baby. I was wrong. I just wanted you to be sure that this is what you wanted. You and Jacob never resolved things from the past. You just kind of lost touch. At least that’s what you told me. I figured it was a second chance for you, baby. You two were so good together. I want you to be happy Kameria. I’m not saying that Darrin is not a good man, I just know how you were when you were with Jacob, that’s all”.
“Daddy, I really wish you wouldn’t have done that. There are some things about Jake and I’s relationship that you don’t know about and now is not the time to talk about it. I’m supposed to be getting married soon. Yes, I love Jake. I will always love Jake, but I’m in love with Darrin. I’m going to marry Darrin. Period”.
I couldn’t believe what I had just heard. I got in my car and drove straight home, praying that Darrin hadn’t changed the locks on me. I literally cried all the way to the house. I know my dad had good intentions, but this whole thing was a mess. The hospital was calling me non-stop. The detective asked me to come down to the station. It was just too much for me. I had to explain to the detective that I was not Jake’s wife and there had been a mix-up. I told him that he should talk to Jake’s parents.
Darrin was sitting at the kitchen counter doing something on his iPad when I walked in the house. I went to the refrigerator, got my bowl of fruit and started towards the patio.
“Look at me, Kam”, he said catching me off guard.
I looked at him barely able to keep my composure.
“Come here”, he said.
“You go ahead and finish your work. I’m gonna sit outside for a minute”, I replied, still trying to hold it together.
“I said come here”.
I sat my bowl down on the counter and walked over to him.
He pulled me close to him.
“You’ve been crying. Why”, he asked.
And the waterfalls began. He took my hand, grabbed my bowl of fruit off of the counter, and led me to the hammock in the center of the backyard, underneath the oak tree. He held me, feeding me fruit, in an attempt to get me to stop crying. I laid in his chest; bawling.
Everything was slowly falling apart. My perfect life was fading right before my eyes. How could I tell Darrin what my dad had done? I couldn’t lie to him anymore; I had already done enough of that. What would he think of my dad? It was just too much. And with all that was going on, I was still worried about Jake’s condition. And what about Darrin? It would only be a matter of time before people began to get suspicious. Especially with the little mix-up at the hospital. I still didn’t know how they got my name and associated me with being Jake’s wife.
3
Even though some time had passed, it was still quite awkward around the house. I woke up to an empty bed and a quiet house. It wasn’t like Darrin to leave without telling me where he was going. I didn’t want to pressure him too much. I tried as best I could to put myself in his shoes. I could only imagine what he was going through. I
would feel him tossing and turning at night. I don’t think he had even been to sleep since the incident. I checked all of the closets and drawers just to make sure he hadn’t left me. All of his things were still there, so, I figured he was as well.
Jake had only been in the hospital for about a week after the shooting. He as unconscious for two days which was a bit frightening for me. Not knowing when or if he would wake up. I remember the day that he finally did. I was so relieved.
Kyle had sent me a message in the middle of the night to say that Jake was awake and asking for me. He said he wouldn’t say anything to anybody; just that he kept saying he needed to see me. I was hesitant to go because I didn’t want Darrin to think that I was abandoning him by going to see Jake. On the other hand, it would look quite suspicious to law enforcement if Jake kept asking for me and I didn’t show up. If nothing else, I needed to know how the hospital knew to call me that night.
I called Darrin before I left the house and like I figured, he didn’t answer. I had Kyle come to pick me up because I wasn’t feeling well. For someone who was always eating, I hadn’t eaten a full meal since the night Jake and I went out, so my body was reacting accordingly.
It was bothering me to keep the tid bit of information about Darrin and Rico to myself; especially from Kyle. On the ride to the hospital I decided to tell him what I knew in hopes that he’d have some sound advice to give me. I must say, I was not ready for what he had to say. He said, and I quote:
“Kam, I can’t believe you don’t remember who Rico is. Tydrek Mills. He used to be real, real skinny. Used to come around the neighborhood every now and then. Scary lil dude; couldn’t bust a grape. He went to jail for robbing somebody and dude came back swole. His sister got buck wild while he was gone and popped up pregnant. Apparently, Brock ‘nem ran a train on her at a party and she didn’t know who the baby daddy was. Jake was there but he said he didn’t hit, he was just there. The story she told was they made her do it. She named a whole bunch of dudes. Jake, Brock, Terry, Slim; everybody basically who was at the party. She didn’t press charges though. Rico got out and went after all them dudes. He ran up on Brock one night at the club and they say, him and Jake stumped ‘em. Say dude was almost unconscious. Well come to find out, the lil girl uncle had been molesting her and that’s who she was pregnant by. Her momma made her get an abortion. Dude got whooped for nothing. But yeah, he been tryna get back at them ever since. That was so long ago. I can’t believe he still with that. He didn’t have to do my boy Jake like that though”.
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