She wrapped her arms around me, and it should have been one of the most incredible moments ever, but –
“Wait, this isn’t right,” I said. “You have the face of my mother, but you are not my mother, are you?”
“What do you think?” she asked.
“I think you’re like a shadow of her, but you’re not real.”
“You have been told that this is not the world of spirits.”
“I know, I know. It’s just that, I want so badly to see her again. Why do you appear to me with her face? Why torture me with the sight of her?” I was at the point of tears.
“I torture you not, dear child. You see the face that you want to see. If it is torture, then it is you that torture yourself.”
“Who are you then?”
“I am the one your ancestors called Brighid.”
“You are the goddess?” I asked incredulously.
“I am a goddess to some,” she replied. Her voice was soft and melodic yet strong. It was strange. Even though her lips moved, the voice seemed to come from someplace other than the body in front of me.
“I don’t think I’ve ever really believed in God,” I said.
“You are experiencing me here, now, with your senses. What do you believe now?”
“My world has been turned so upside down ever since I first saw Hindergog. I don’t know what to believe anymore.”
“That’s a fine answer Emily. Yes, keep your mind open. Observe. Consider. Answers will come to you in time.”
“Goddess, I would like to see your true face. Can you show me who you truly are?”
Her whole body and demeanor changed. She seemed to grow larger and yet at the same time less substantial. She became a shimmery vision. Instead of the common clothes of a human in my time, she wore a long gown that seemed to skim her body yet be a part of it as well.
But it was her face that caught my attention the most. Her face was my mother’s face, but then it was Saorla. As swiftly as it became Saorla, it changed yet again to another woman with auburn hair. Her face would stay one person for maybe a few minutes, no more, then swiftly morph to another woman’s face. There were women who looked much like Saorla and my mother, but there were others with dark hair and eyes. Some had dark skin, others had fair skin. At one point I even recognized the face of Madame Wong. I was glad to see the familiar visage that I had come so accustomed to. But as soon as I got excited, the face morphed yet again into another unknown woman. Each time this bizarre metamorphosis happened, the head of this being glowed a different color.
“Who are all these women? I wanted to see your true face.”
“This is the true face of the goddess. Each woman from your world who has visited me here has envisioned me as she would. The goddess is created in the likeness of humans.”
“Wild. I always thought we were created in the likeness of God. But Goddess, I want to see your true form. Please show me your natural state.”
“My natural state is one that cannot be readily accepted by your human senses,” she softly replied.
I was totally mesmerized by Brighid. At first her gown seemed like a silky material gently blown about her in a breeze that didn't exist. But the material – and that isn’t quite the right word for it – was like nothing in our world. It was as if someone had spun pure silver into a fabric then woven throughout it an iridescent material in shades of blue and turquoise and purple, then set the whole thing into motion. It was like she wore a shimmering, iridescent liquid.
Being in her presence I felt content and at peace. I wanted to stay there, with the Goddess, forever. I was with a presence of pure love. I could create anything I needed or desired. Why ever leave?
“Emily, you will leave when the time is right. You cannot stay forever in the Netherworld.”
“But why do I have to leave? Here I am in your presence and I feel a happiness and contentedness I’ve never felt before.”
Her entire being became even brighter. She smiled and said, “Oh yes, and I enjoy your company too. I have always relished my time with your ancestors and the other humans who have found their way here. Such fascinating creatures, humans. Few of your kind realize the wondrous miracle of being human. To exist in your glorious bodies. Within those shells of water that house your Anam, you can create. That is a rare gift.”
“But here in the Netherworld I’ve created anything that I want.”
“While it is true that while here you can think and therefore conjure those things that you would like to have. But surely you must have noticed by now that your creations here are but a pale comparison to that which you create in your own space and time.”
I hadn’t thought about it before, but it was true. I created chocolate chip pancakes in the Netherworld, but they lacked something. It wasn’t quite right.
“I shall enjoy our time together, dear Emily, as I hope that you do as well. But your corporeal world needs you.”
I had learned and done so much in the Netherworld that at times it was easy to forget why I was there and what I’d left behind. The faces of Fanny and Jake and even my dad flooded my mind. Thinking of my friends and my dad brought a wave of sadness over me. Madame Wong had kept me so busy, I didn’t have much time to stop and think about home.
“I do miss my friends. I think I may even miss my dad.”
“We shall begin your training then, dear one, so you may return to your world and those that you love.”
“I have been here so long, at times it feels like I’ve always been in the Netherworld. But in all this time, I honestly don’t understand exactly where I am. Am I in a dream?”
“No, not a dream. You create dreams in your own mind and are not shared with others. This we are experiencing together.”
“It feels so dreamlike.”
“The Netherworld is what your scientists might call a parallel world. If you think of space, your Earth and the Netherworld exist in the same space.”
“What a mind trip. I’m not sure I understand it. Are there other worlds like this one?”
“Oh there are many other realms though no two are exactly alike. Your world is a fairly rare occurrence in the great scheme of the web of all that is.”
“Can people from Earth go to these other worlds, like I’ve come here?”
“Yes.”
“But that’s another question. How exactly did I get here? What happened?”
“Yes, these things seem difficult to humans. You were there, in your world, standing on what felt like solid ground. The next minute, you were here in an ephemeral world of mist and fog. You have these magnificent bodies with your ability to create and then fully encounter through your senses the delights of your creations – or the horrors of your creations as the case may be. Your bodies and minds are incredible, but they also limit you as well.
“Humans say ‘I have to see it to believe it’. Instead, you must believe it before you can see it.”
“Are you saying that I needed to believe in the Netherworld in order to come here?”
“That is helpful, yes, to believe. If all humans believed, all could go anywhere they wanted. In order to come here, you had some help though.
“The Sacred Well of your ancestors was sacred because it was known to be a place where what your ancestors called the ‘veil’ between our two worlds is thin. Your scientists may find that there is a higher level than usual of electromagnetic energy at the Sacred Well.”
“I don’t think my ancestors knew anything about electromagnetic energy.”
“Oh, they did not have those words for it, but they were more in touch with the unseen than modern humans. They could feel the same things you felt. The hair rising on their bodies, the tingling sensation. They knew there was a strange and magickal energy in that place. And the ancient torc that you wear on your arm helped you to come here as well.”
“The torc is magick?”
“Magick is your human word for it. It is no mistake that the torc is made of twisted
, coiled gold. Gold is an excellent conductor of energy.”
“I never thought of it before, but it looks kind of like a bundle of wires.”
“There is a reason the transport objects for electricity in your world are made of coiled wire.”
“So the torc is like a conductor?”
“It helps the wearer to achieve the resonant frequency required to come to this realm.”
“Goddess, you have revealed so many faces. Have you been visited by many humans?”
“Yes, I enjoyed my interaction with humans for millennia.”
“What happened?”
“Humans changed.”
“How so?”
“They stopped believing. They stopped having faith. They want ‘proof’. Everything they must see with their eyes. All experiences come through their body now. They have lost touch with Akasha.”
“Yes, I see what you mean. I didn’t know that before I came here. But now, seeing what I’ve seen, knowing what I know … ”
“That is it. Now you know, not just see.”
“Yes.”
“As humans lost faith, their need for gods and goddesses faded.”
“But on Earth now, there are religions with billions of followers who believe in God.”
“There may be a few that truly believe with their Anam that there is a life after they leave their body and many more hope that there will be such an existence, but even fewer still know that they are infinite beings, part of the web of all things. You do not have to believe in a god. You are god.”
“I wish everyone could have the experience that I did in the dark wood.”
“All can have that experience and know what you now know, if only they open their heart.”
I had wanted so badly to have these questions answered, and I was so riveted by our conversation, that for a while, I forgot why I was there. But then the vision of Jake and Fanny with my dad on a train came back to me.
“I’m so glad that you have answered my questions. These are things that I’ve wondered about since I came here but I was afraid to ask Madame Wong. She probably would have hit me with that darned cane of hers.”
The Goddess softly chuckled. Her laugh filled me on the inside and brought a smile to my lips. “Yes, Madame Wong lacks the patience for questions.”
“But I’m not here with you just to have my questions answered, am I?”
“You tell me, young one. Are you ready to fulfill your destiny?”
“I don’t feel ready.”
“If you do not feel ready then you are not ready.”
“What now?”
“Now you delve deeper into the mysteries of Akasha.”
49. THE DUGHALL ENIGMA
“We must talk young Emily about our friend Dughall.”
“From what Hindergog told me, Dughall is no friend of mine.”
“A wise human once said, ‘If you know neither yourself nor your enemy, you will always endanger yourself’. You have learned much about yourself here in this land of mist and fog, have you not?”
“Yes, Goddess, I have.”
“Then it is time for you to learn about your enemy. What do you think he is after?”
“I thought you knew! You must know.”
“It is a simple thing to know the hearts of humans, but not so simple to know the plans of one who is no longer quite human. Dughall spent many years in the Umbra Nihili, perfecting his ability to hide his thoughts and plans from all, including me. I have ideas about this dark one. But you Emily, must understand him if you are to stop him.”
“I don’t think I want to know anything too deep about him.”
“If he is successful with his quest, it will surely lead to the destruction of your world and perhaps even this one. If you are to end his quest, you will need to know something of the man that you are destined to meet.”
Brighid told me Dughall’s story. I learned about his enslavement as a child, the horrible life of his mother, his escape and the Umbra Nihili. It was hard to listen to it. At time, I found myself feeling sorry for him. But as the story went on, my anger rose.
I lost my mom too. Okay, she wasn’t a slave and wasn’t killed at the hands of another. But I watched her be tortured by the alien tar being. My dearest one got snatched from me too. I didn’t go on a murderous rampage.
“It is one of the mysteries of humans. Infinitely fascinating creatures.”
“What mystery?”
“That two different individuals, in similar circumstances, can choose such divergent paths. You walk the path of yellow bricks. Dughall walks a path paved with the broken and scoured bones of his enemies.
“Now you know his story. What do you think he is after?”
I reflected on the story. It was clear to me that Dughall wanted power and revenge. But there was more to it too. After a while it dawned on me. Maybe he was more like me than I cared to think. And maybe like me, he wanted to be reunited with one he lost. As soon as I thought it Brighid’s robes shimmered ever brighter.
“He wants to find his mother,” I said.
“Yes, smart girl.”
“But why does he want to come here? I have learned that this is not the place of human spirits.”
“No, it is not.”
“Maybe he is mistaken. Maybe he thinks it is and boy will he be disappointed when he gets here. He’ll find nothing but mist and fog.”
“Ah, that would be the fates playing a cruel joke on one who deserves such a joke.”
“Do you think that is what will happen then, if he makes it here?”
“The portends of the future speak of another possibility.”
“Then what is it? What could he hope to find here?”
“Ah, that is one of the mysteries for which we will need to go deeper.”
“Mysteries? You mean there is more to this place than I’ve seen?”
“Much more to the mysteries, my Youngling. Much more.”
“You will teach me then, won’t you? If I’m to defeat Dughall, I have to know all there is to know about this place.”
“You will learn the mysteries that you need to complete your task. Perhaps someday you will return to learn more mysteries. Now, it is time.”
“Time for what?”
“Time to learn about the mystery of time.”
“Time is a mystery?”
“Time, space. Here, there. Yesterday, today, tomorrow. All just different names for one. If you learn this lesson, you will have a most powerful weapon, one that will help you defeat Dughall.”
As always in the Netherworld each question was answered with a riddle wrapped inside an enigma.
“More riddles Goddess.”
“What is life without riddles young one?”
I thought that I’d seen every strange thing there was to see in that place. I was wrong.
50. PUT YOUR BOAT IN
“Your scientists say that nothing can travel faster than the speed of light,” said Brighid.
“Yeah, I think it was Einstein that came up with that.”
“Very limiting, isn’t it?”
“Well it’s a limit set by Mother Nature.”
“Nature set no such boundary. The true boundary is the one created by the human mind. Einstein was a bright man. Very smart, but very wrong.”
“Wrong? You’re saying Einstein was wrong? So we can travel faster than the speed of light?”
“You can be anywhere that you want in an instant.”
“But how is that possible? We haven’t even made it to Mars.”
“Emily, you have seen the truth of my statement, yet still you allow what you have been told to limit you. Did you not experience the web of all things?”
“Well, yes.”
“You knew what it was and could sense it with all your being even though you had left your human body behind. That is because you are the web and it is you.”
“Yes, I knew that. I could feel it.”
“Why then child do you questi
on your ability to be anyplace within the web whenever you want?”
“You mean right now, if I want to, I could be on Mars in an instant?”
“Yes. But you may want to leave your human body behind for that journey. Mars is not particularly hospitable for humans.”
“But how?”
“It is a choice. Your Anam is not limited by space or by time.”
“Wait a minute. Time? Are you saying we can also travel through time?”
“Time is a fiction created by the human mind. You have also seen that for yourself. You have been living in a world without time.”
“I’m not sure I understand what time is. It seems impossible to go back in time because the past is over. And it seems equally impossible to travel forward to something that doesn’t exist yet. And Madame Wong’s always croaking about being in the ‘now.’”
“Madame Wong’s advice is accurate as always. It is best to stay in your present moment and let the stream take you. But time is much like a stream.”
A stream appeared before me. It babbled over rocks and meandered through a meadow and disappeared into a thick wood.
“I have created a stream so very much like one you may find on your planet. Do you see how the water flows?”
“Yes, but it flows in only one direction.”
“’Tis true young one, ‘tis true. But what you see around you when you are in the stream, do you agree that what you observe of your surroundings depends much on where you put your boat in?”
I had to think on that one a minute.
“So if the stream is like time, then if I put my boat in – back there, by the big willow … ”
“Then that is what you observe.”
“And that’s like the past.”
“Yes.”
“But if I put the boat in way up there, by that big oak … ”
“Then you are with the oak at that moment.”
“And that is like the future?”
“Precisely.”
“I can put my boat in the stream wherever I want to. So are you saying that the same is true of time? I can go to any time that I want simply by choosing it?”
“Your Anam is eternal. You already exist in all places that ever existed and all time that ever was or will be. Once you fully incorporate this into the core of your being, your Anam will then be able to travel to any place that it wants to because, you see, you are already there.”
The Akasha Chronicles Trilogy Boxed Set: The Complete Emily Adams Series Page 22