He nestled Arabella into his arm and then looked again at Gran.
‘I hope you like where you are now, Gran,’ Milo whispered. He hoped that she felt less confused than she did when she was here, never sure of whether it was then or now or later. Everyone kept saying she was in heaven but Milo wanted her to be somewhere more concrete – a place she loved, like in Inverary on her fishing boat or swimming in the sea. And he hoped that Gramps would be there too.
‘Do you promise you’ll keep watching us, like you always did?’ Milo asked. ‘Gran sees everything, Arabella.’ He caught a bit of dribble on Arabella’s chin. ‘Now that you’re family, she’ll look out for you too.’
He was sure of this, that wherever Gran was, she’d be looking out for them all, seeing the world as he did, flutters of light through the pinhole.
‘Gran will see everything, Arabella, everything.’
She’ll see The Hairy Mansion where Mrs Moseley has switched on Mrs Hairy’s stereo: together they’ll be dancing in the marble hallway between the plastic palm trees.
She’ll see Forget Me Not, where Nurse Heidi will serve up a Christmas dinner with the new Director, Nurse Barnett, but everyone calls her Pam because it’s a friendly place. The old people’s plates will be filled with all the trimmings – everything except roast potatoes. The bag of King Edwards will have mysteriously disappeared from the pantry.
She’ll see Petros hammering a nail into the wall of the lounge, the painting of the fishing boat resting at his feet. And she’ll see a new old lady, Susie, eighty-four, moving into Lou’s room where the yellow rose still blooms. There’s a draught coming through the window – Petros will have to see to that.
‘I promise to visit Petros every day,’ Milo whispered, his eyes still closed. ‘And Arabella will come too, won’t you?’
After that, Gran will see the Harley leaning in close to the road as Clouds turns onto the A819 leading to Inverary. He’ll spend Christmas with his family, he wants to introduce them to Kasia. Kasia will sit on the back clutching Al’s waist, breathing in the sea air that reminds her of Poland. Perhaps Al will bring her to Inverary in the summer, too, and they’ll leave their clothes on the beach and they’ll swim in the dark sea, like Gran and Gramps used to do all those years ago.
She’ll see Mum’s head resting on Tripi’s shoulder. They’re asleep, rocked by the motion of the train that’s taking them to a human rights campaigner who lives on the south coast. Maybe, from where Gran is, she’ll be able to reach out and touch them. And she’ll keep watching them to make sure they’re safe, that Tripi doesn’t get sent away, and she’ll help them find Ayishah and then she’ll watch them bring her home. Maybe they’ll get married, like Big Mike and Lalana, so that Tripi and Ayishah can stay in England for ever. Gran will be at the wedding too, Mum’s bridesmaid, holding a bunch of yellow roses.
And in a few days, after the candles and the cake and the unwrapping of a quilted bed for Hamlet, Gran will watch Milo take Hamlet in his arms and walk up to her old room under the roof. On the wall next to Gran’s bed, next to the newspaper cutting of Gramps in his uniform, Milo will have tacked up the photographs Mr Overend gave him of baby Arabella. For a while Milo will sit next to the crib, watching the rise and fall of his baby sister’s chest. Hamlet will snuffle and grunt and nudge the crib with his nose. It turns out Dad was right, Hamlet does like the little girl.
Gran will watch Angela come in, and she’ll watch Milo help her carry Arabella to the small basin in Gran’s bathroom, take Gran’s flannel and smooth it across his baby sister’s new skin.
You’re her brother, Gran whispers behind Milo’s eyelids. You’ll keep her safe and one day, when the world goes dark, she’ll be your eyes.
When Arabella is washed and dressed, Gran will watch all five of them, Milo, Arabella, Angela, Dad and Hamlet, walk to Forget Me Not where they’ll have Christmas pudding with the old ladies and Petros. Mrs Zimmer has taken a shine to Hamlet: she lets him sleep on her lap while she dozes off in front of the news.
I think we’re missing someone, Gran whispers.
Of course, Milo smiles.
After the thrill of his drive to London, Mr Overend will get bored of staring out of his window, so Gran will watch him open his wardrobe, put on his old suit, his black lace-up shoes, get into his Volvo and drive out of Slipton.
‘Where will he go, Gran?’
No one’s sure, Milo. But if you close your eyes and listen really hard, you’ll always be able to hear his whistling. I can hear him now…
‘Milo, are you coming?’ Dad’s voice floats down through the chapel.
Milo keeps his eyes screwed shut. ‘Just a minute, Dad.’ He squeezes Arabella against his chest.
As he looks through Gran’s eyes one last time, Milo sees the night sky at the end of the dark tunnel, a bright, white coin of light.
Bye, Gran, he says.
And then the hole begins to close, the moon shrinks to a dot, to the shiny head of a pin and then nothing.
What Milo Saw Page 32