by Frank Downey
"The boy has got it bad for you. And doesn't think you'll go out with him in a million years."
Sophia stopped. And said, firmly, "He's wrong about that."
"He is?"
"Yup. No need to surrender your right arm in a bet, Alison- -you were right. I realized it last night. That's why I want to talk to you. I'm in love with him. Great. Now what do I do?"
"I told him you were. And I told him to tell you he was. And he didn't believe me."
Sophia sighed. "Oh boy. So, I fall in love with the most unlikely guy I could have ever picked. And now I can't get him to do anything about it."
"You know Warren. He's got about as much experience with girls as I do with nuclear physics." They both laughed. "If I know Warren-and I do-he's keeping himself up nights trying to figure out a way to tell you how he feels. And, if I still know Warren-he's not going to be able to do it. Sophia, he is terrified."
"Oy veh. So, where does this leave me?"
"With the ball in your court."
"Um... meaning..."
"Meaning you are going to have to take the first step, here."
"Me? Ask him out?"
"You got it."
"Oh boy. I've never done that before."
"That's fitting, because I'm sure he's never been asked out before, either."
Sophia chuckled, and then got serious: "I don't know if I can do it. I know I've had more experience than he has, but I've never been aggressive. I was never allowed to. I've always been passive."
"Didn't Warren tell me that was one of the things that you were working on-making your own decisions, going after things, being more aggressive?"
"Yeah."
"So, show the boy what you've learned!"
Sophia laughed.
"Look," Alison continued. "I know he's shown some serious courage on your behalf recently."
"Standing up for me with Scott."
"Exactly. And, not to be blunt, but it is your turn. You know how he feels. He hasn't said it, but he's shown you. But he does not know how you feel. And somebody's got to say it, dammit!!"
Sophia laughed. Alison was right. Sophia said so.
"I always am," Alison replied cheerfully.
It took until Tuesday. Sophia spent the whole day at work with Warren on Monday paralyzed with fright, and spent the whole day-including their customary walk home-without saying a word about it.
And then spent Monday night kicking herself for not saying anything.
They walked home Tuesday. Warren insisted on carrying Sophia's bookbag-like he did Monday-to save her injured torso. He prattled on the whole way home, while Sophia muttered "hmmm" and "yeah".
They got to her house, and she grabbed his hand and led him to the seat on the porch.
"Sophia. Hello, Earth to Sophia! Are you in there?"
"Hmmm? Oh!... Warren, I'm sorry."
"You haven't heard a word I've said, have you?"
"Not really. I'm sorry. I've got something on my mind."
"AAA. I thought I saw the smoke coming out of your ears." Sophia giggled. "Anything I can help you out with?"
"Nah, War, I'm alright. Just something I have to work out in my mind. I made a decision about something, and now I have to figure out how to put it into action."
"Hmm. Sounds weighty. Maybe Warren the Magnificent can lend a hand?"
"I don't think so, Warren. This is something I have to do. And I have to do it myself."
"Another self-improvement mission?"
Sophia giggled. "You might say that."
"Well, then, Sophia. Just do it. You gonna let me in on it, at least?"
Sophia thought about that for a moment. Just do it. What the fuck, right? He was right. Just do it. She laughed to herself-little did he know what he was talking about.
"Yeah, Warren, I think I will let you in on it. I've made up my mind. I have to do something. And what I have to do, is this..." and she put her arms around him, reached in, and gave him a long, slow, beautiful kiss.
And Warren couldn't have been more shocked if Paul McCartney had strolled down the street strumming a guitar and singing "Hey Jude".
Sophia broke the kiss-and wished for a camera, because the look on Warren's face was priceless. And then she said it: "Warren Kelleher, will you go out with me?"
Warren blinked. Then he shook his head, because Paul McCartney was still walking down the street, but now Ringo was playing tambourine along side. He looked at Sophia, and said the only thing that came to mind: "Are you SERIOUS?"
Sophia laughed. "Let's see... I just gave you the greatest kiss of your entire life..."
"True. Not that there was much competition, mind you."
"... forget that part. Like I said, greatest kiss of your life, then I ask you to be my boyfriend, and you have to ask if I'm serious??"
"Well, it was unexpected."
"Only because you're horrible at picking up subtle hints. And because I'm perpetually confused. I should've done this a while ago."
"You should've?"
"Yes, I should have. Is it so inconceivable? Me asking you out?"
"YES!"
"Why?"
"It just is. We have completely different lifestyles. We have different friends. Shit, Soph, your friends are going to hound you mercilessly for going out with someone like me. Plus, you're beautiful-and I'm just plain ol' Warren."
"I happen to think plain ol' Warren is pretty hot. You might be Prep Boy, but you're still good looking. Besides which, inside, you are the most beautiful person I know. We can integrate our lifestyles, because mine is changing with or without you anyway. As for my friends-the ones I really care about will get over it, and as for the rest, fuck 'em. Warren... I love you. More than I ever thought I could love another person."
Warren looked down at her. She had the most incredible smile, and was looking at him with complete adoration. He realized he had seen that look before, but didn't know it for what it was. Maybe she hadn't known it for what it was, either, but she had figured it out. She'd figured it out, and taken an enormous leap of faith. He knew being aggressive wasn't one of her strengths-but she had taken the initiative. And he was so thankful that she had.
"Sophia, I love you, too. Yes, I will go out with you."
Chapter 7 - Full Metal Jessica
They spent a few minutes sitting on Sophia's porch, cuddling and kissing a bit, not saying much of anything. Sophia couldn't believe how happy and relieved she felt, and Warren was plainly looking like the cat who had eaten the canary. She was reclining on the seat, the back of her head against his chest, his arms around her waist, both of their legs spread out on the bench. She could hear his heart beating. It was a very comfortable place to be.
Then Sophia saw movement coming up the street. "Uh Oh."
"Uh oh, what?"
"Remember how you were talking about my friends, and how I said they'd just have to get used to it? Well, here comes the first test. That's Jessie walking up the street."
"Your best friend, Jessie?"
"The same."
"You wanna get up and sit next to me, so she doesn't see us all cozy like this?"
"Not on your life."
"Wow. Did somebody give you a chutzpah infusion today?" They both laughed, as Jessie walked up the stairs to the porch, a very quizzical look on her face.
"Yo, Soph," she said.
"Hiya, Jessie. Jess, this is Warren."
"So this is the famous Prep Boy, eh? Right. So what the fuck is going on here??"
Warren and Sophia both laughed. "OK, Jess," Sophia said, "I fucked up that introduction. Jess, this is my boyfriend Warren."
"BOYFRIEND????"
"That's right."
"When did this happen?"
Warren laughed, as Sophia replied, "Oh, about five or so minutes ago!"
Jessie moved to the chair across from the bench where Warren and Sophia were. She looked completely dumbfounded. Then she looked at Warren and said, "You mean to tell me that the Preppie actually
had the balls to ask you out?"
Sophia laughed out loud, as Warren looked embarrassed. "Actually, I asked him out."
"Where did you get the balls to ask him out?"
"Dunno. I just did."
Jessie was completely amazed. Then, she got a wry little smile on her face, and said to Warren, "Very nice. Can't even ask the girl out yourself, haveta wait until she does it. Typical Preppie."
"I am never going to live that one down, I can see it now."
"Got that right." She looked back at Sophia. "So, the Party Woman Extraordinaire is going out with the Ultimate Preppie, have I got this right?"
"Right."
Jessica snorted. "You know, this is gonna go over real well with the gang at the next beer and bong bash."
"I don't care, Jess."
"No, I don't suppose that you do. Probably a good thing. You've spent too much time worrying about what other people think, Soph, I've told you that before. Not caring what anyone else thinks is a big step."
"I know."
Jessica thought for a minute. Then she looked at Warren with a practiced eye. "He's not bad-looking, is he? For a preppy, I mean."
"I feel like a piece of meat," Warren mock-complained.
"You just learn your place, honey, and we'll get along just fine," Jess spat out. Sophia cracked up laughing.
"Course, I can't see his ass in that position, so I can't give him a number grade, but he seems to look presentable and all."
"Is she always like this?" Warren asked.
Sophia giggled. "Oh, this is mild, man-of-mine. You haven't gotten even a hint of Full Metal Jessica just yet."
Jessica snorted, "Damn straight. Hey, I'm trying to be open and welcoming, here."
Warren laughed at that. "And the effort has not gone unappreciated. Unnoticed until you mentioned it, maybe, but not unappreciated."
Jessie looked at Sophia, in amazement. "Prep Boy actually gives as good as he gets?"
"Frequently."
"Wow. The mind boggles. You'll have to excuse me, but I have seen my entire worldview turned upside down in an instant, here."
Sophia said, "Your worldview? Imagine the flips mine has taken in the past couple of months! Actually, Jess, you're taking this quite well. I expected a whole 'Are you crazy, what the hell do you think you're doing???' rant by now."
Jessie looked serious. "And, a month ago you might have gotten one. Sophia, you love him?"
"Yes"
"Preppy, you love her?"
"Completely."
"Good. Considering what's gone on in Sophia's life recently, I only have one rant to make." She stood up. "Preppy, listen to me and listen good. You had better make damn sure you are very fucking good to my one and only best friend. Do you read me?"
"Loud and clear, ma'am."
"Good. You hurt her like those other assholes and I will rip your balls off and feed them to my hamster."
Jess softened, and sat back down. "But you're not the type to hurt his girlfriend, are you? No, not at all, I'd wager," she said almost to herself. Then she recovered herself: "Besides, look at the two of you, cuddling up all cozy-like. It's enough to make a body sick." They all laughed.
"Jess," Sophia said, "thanks for making this easy. I really appreciate it."
Jessie snorted, "What? Me stand in the course of true love? Heaven forbid."
Warren chuckled. "Honey, I have to get going. I have a pile of studying, plus I'm hungry."
"Can you call me later?"
"Sure." They got up, and shared a good-bye kiss, as Jessica made mock-gagging noises. They just looked at her and grinned, and Warren headed off down the street.
From behind him, he heard Jessica yell, so he could hear. "Alright, Sophia, I give the ass an eight!"
Chapter 8 - Just Like Romeo And Juliet
Sophia sat at her kitchen table, doling out the happy meals to Eric and Tara, her younger brother and sister. Eric was 8, Tara 6, and they really were cute kids. She had to baby-sit tonight after work, because her mother had gotten an extra shift at the hotel where she worked the front desk. Luckily, she had company-Warren had come home with her. He had gone with her to McDonalds to get some food, and was now making googoo eyes at Tara while he ate his Big Mac. Sophia smiled to herself, as Warren engaged Eric on the finer points of the Boston Bruins' power play. Then he made more funny faces at Tara. Tara was utterly charmed, Eric thought Warren was "neat", and Sophia couldn't stop smiling. She'd never had another boyfriend who even acknowledged Eric and Tara's existence. What a guy, she thought for about the millionth time in the two weeks that they had been going out.
"You're really good with little kids."
"I like 'em. Always have. And Eric and Tara are cool."
"You've got these at home, didn't you say?"
"Yeah, but a little bit older. Ryan is eleven, and Kristin is nine."
"Well, you've got Eric and Tara eating out of the palm of your hand."
Warren laughed. "It's practice."
"Practice?"
"I told you I want to be a doctor, right? Well, what I want to be is a pediatrician."
"Judging from my siblings here, you've certainly got the bedside manner thing down already."
"It was easy with them. They're good kids."
"I gotta get 'em ready for bed. Wanna help?"
"Actually, if you don't mind, I'm gonna crack these books. I did tell you if I came over with you, you'd have to put up with me studying for a bit."
"Right. OK, come on guys, let's get those PJ's on!"
Sophia got her brother and sister ready for bed, and Tara insisted on coming down to "kiss Warren goodnight." Eric settled for a high five. Sophia shooed them up to bed, then came back down to find Warren with his nose buried in a book.
"Watcha readin'?"
"Hamlet."
"Isn't that Shakespeare?"
"Uh-huh. I wasn't lying when I told you I read him for fun, but this is an assignment. I've read it before, but it's been a while, so I'm refreshing my memory. I got my biology done so I figured I'd delve into Hamlet for a while."
"Why do you do this?"
"Do what?"
"Study so hard."
"So I can get good grades, which will allow me to get into a good college, which if I continue to get good grades will allow me to get into medical school."
"Got it all figured out, eh?"
"Well, I am only fourteen. Things could change. But you still need the grades to get into college, that part doesn't change."
"I'm just in awe that you even have a clue of what to do with your life. I don't."
"What do you like?"
"Academically? Nothing."
"Soph, if you paid attention in class every once in a while, you might find something."
"Thanks, Prep Boy,"
"Don't mention it. Besides which, I do know something you like. I doubt you could take it yet, but you could build towards it."
"What?"
"When we're watching TV, what channel do you keep flipping to?"
"Well, the Weather Channel. I like weather."
"Right. Meteorology is a career, you know." Warren teased.
"Hmmm. I never thought about it. Ah, it doesn't matter. I'll never get into college, not with my grades."
"Sophia, you're a freshman. You have plenty of time to change."
"Yeah, but I've got a horrible hole to dig myself out of."
"That's the easy part. Colleges will ignore your freshman year, if the other years are good. In fact, they love that stuff. Big improvement in high school grades? That overshadows the crummy beginning."
"Really?"
"Absolutely."
"Hmmm. Of course, I'd have to start to care about school. That's the real tough part. It's so boring."
"It can't be all boring. You have to keep your mind open. I have discovered interesting things in school that I wouldn't have otherwise."
"You go to a better school than I do."
"True. But you'll find so
mething. And, sometimes, you just have to fake it for the sake of the grade." They both laughed. "I hate math, with a passion. But I've got an A in geometry so far."
"I'll have to give this some thought. Now, tell me about this Shakespeare guy."
"I'll do better than tell you." He dug around in his bookbag. "I like Hamlet, but you don't want to start with that one." He withdrew a book and looked at it. "Comedy is good to start, and Taming of the Shrew is one of his best, but I think I've got something that your tortured romantic soul will like even better." Sophia giggled. Warren withdrew another book. "Aha! Here we go. Romeo and Juliet. Here, read this."
"I don't know if I can actually read Shakespeare."
"Sure you can. Listen, the language can be a bit daunting, but most of it you can get from context. This is also my study copy, so you'll see some notes on words in the margins. Any you don't get, you can ask me. The most important thing in reading Shakespeare is to not let the language hold you up. Go with the flow. Don't get frustrated. A word here or there escapes, fine, as long as you get the gist of it. It's the ideas, and the poetry of the language, that you want to get. As the man himself said, 'The play's the thing.'"
"You really think I can get through this?"
"I know you can, Sophia. And, if you get it, you will love that one. Make sure you have a box of tissues handy. Weep, cry, sob." Sophia laughed.
"OK, Warren, if you think I can do this. I'll give it a try."
Sophia fell asleep reading. She called Warren after school the next day, asking about a passage. He clarified it for her, and she surprised herself at how quick she got off the phone to continue reading.
He was right, if you didn't let the language bog you down, it was not really difficult reading. And, wow what a story. Now she knew why Warren was hooked.
She finished Romeo and Juliet before she went to sleep that night. And she used half a box of tissues.
They worked after school the next day. Sophia walked in, and Warren was already there, starting in on the dishes.
"Hi, Prep Boy." She held out the copy of Romeo and Juliet. "What a great, great book."
"You liked it?"
"Loved it. Couldn't put it down. Amazing, isn't it?" They both laughed. "Now I know why you picked that one to give me first, though. It's kind of... well, it's kind of us, isn't it?"