by Anne Hampson
‘He could have taken me with him,’ she said in muffled tones, her face in the pillow. ‘I’m sure he could
— if he’d wanted to.’
Obviously he had not wanted to.
In spite of what she had said Gale spent the whole of Thursday cleaning the house. She cooked a tasty meal for when her father returned in the late afternoon. He neither commented on the meal nor noticed what she had done in the house, even though she had put clean pyjamas on his bed and washed and ironed all his shirts and other clothes which she found in the linen basket.
‘I’ll see you some time, then,’ he said on the Friday morning as he went out. ‘Enjoy yourself,’ he added peevishly - like a spoiled child, she thought. ‘And don’t let your conscience prick you!’
‘I won’t,’ she shot back, but in a voice of sweetness which was rewarded with a glowering look.
‘You’re your mother’s daughter - no mistake about that,’ he snarled, and went out, slamming the door behind him.
She washed the breakfast dishes, set the table for his tea, made his bed, and generally left everything tidy before leaving home. It afforded her satisfaction even though she knew very well that he would no more notice what she had done today than he had noticed last evening.
Tricia’s party was in effect a dinner-dance. Gale met Stephen and liked him enormously. They danced together and later she told Tricia that she considered her most fortunate in having Stephen for a friend. On seeing Tricia’s eyes light up as they sought the figure of Stephen among a group of young men, Gale said no more. Tricia was getting over Trevis - slowly perhaps, but quite surely for all that.
On dancing with Dave Ingham later Gale was asked about her husband.
‘He’s in Munich,’ she told him, ‘on business.’
‘And so you decided to come home and see your friends?’
‘I came primarily to see Mother, but unfortunately for me she’s on holiday. That’s why I’m staying with Tricia.’ Professor Ingham made no comment and after a while she said hesitantly, ‘Do you ever see Trevis?’
‘On occasions,’ he replied guardedly.
There was another long hesitation before Gale said, ‘Does he still go up to the lodge?’
‘I believe he does.’ The non-committal reply should by rights have deterred her from further mention of the subject, but she seemed to be under the effect of some irrepressible force and she asked him if friends still used the lodge when Trevis was not there himself. She glanced up into her partner’s face as she spoke and surprised a strange smile lifting the corners of his mouth. For some incomprehensible reason she was taken in memory back to that night when she had overheard the conversation of this man and Julius, the conversation that made her blood boil at the derogatory manner in which her sex was discussed.
‘Trevis does let friends have his lodge, yes.’
Gale took an impatient breath because her subtle inquiries brought no information whatsoever, and she remained silent, following her partner’s steps and giving herself up to the pleasure of the dance, even though her mind was on her husband, and the way he danced, so superbly and with the arrogant grace of the ancient Hellenic athletes. ‘You’ve gone very quiet,’ observed her partner after a while, in what could only be described as tones of amusement.
‘Your answers to my questions are so brief and unrevealing that talking seems to be a waste of time,’ she told him frankly, and to her surprise he laughed.
‘You mean, questions are a waste of time, don’t you?’ She went red.
‘Shall we change the subject, Dave?’
‘No, I don’t think we will. What is it that you want to know?’
She had to laugh then, and said,
‘Tell me, do you happen to know how Julius and I came to get married?’ Gale regretted the question the moment it was uttered, despite the fact that she had been asking it, in a most roundabout way, for the past few minutes or so. It seemed too intimate now that it was put into plain words; it was not a thing to be brought out like this, even though Dave was her husband’s friend, his trusted friend, of long standing.
‘You’re asking if Julius has confided something to me?’
She did not answer immediately, but endeavoured to read his expression first. There was nothing to infer from it except the faintest hint of puzzlement. This was all she required, though, to answer her question.
‘Obviously he didn’t confide anything in you,’ she stated, and when he shook his head briefly she added, ‘Forget it, please.’
He frowned at her.
‘You have me puzzled, Gale. Was your marriage not as ordinary a business as it appeared? I must admit we were all rather surprised at Julius—’ He stopped, then grinned and carried on, but in tones of faint apology. ‘He was considered to be the confirmed bachelor and so naturally his marriage caused a stir. It was all done so quietly too, and so hurriedly. But I myself knew he was attracted to you, so the idea that there was something not quite straightforward about the marriage never entered my head. Now, however, you have me thinking - and puzzled. Want to confide?’
She bit her lip, angry with herself for her persistence in putting the question which had resulted in arousing his curiosity, and putting thoughts into his head that had not been there before.
‘No, I don’t want to confide,’ she answered firmly, then added, ‘How did you know he was - was attracted to me?’
Professor Ingham shrugged his shoulders.
‘It was obvious. He was always looking at you - I think many of us knew how he was feeling about you.’
Gale reflected on these words, recalling her brother’s declaring that Julius was affected by her beauty, that he hadn’t taken his eyes off her the whole evening. Where Dave had made the mistake was that he had concluded that his friend’s interest was love ... or had he? Some catch of nerves set her alert to the possibility that Dave was under no illusions as to the nature of the attraction which Julius had found in her. The idea made her go hot all over, more especially as she was once again hearing that discussion between Julius and Dave out in the garden on the evening of the barbecue. They had been laughing, talking in such contemptuous terms about women. So completely without strength of character, Dave had said. And they were so very easy to conquer. Julius had agreed, but added that he preferred a fight. And it was then he had gone on to say the thing that set the blood pounding in Gale’s head, so heightened had been her temper. ‘Place your hand on a woman’s heart and she’s yours instantly.’
The music stopped and it was with relief that Gale found herself being led from the floor back to the table. She was filled with a sense of embarrassment, and of shame. It was unbearable to dwell on the idea that Dave -and probably everyone else - believed the tall handsome Greek, who had been regarded as a confirmed bachelor, had married Gale simply for desire. And yet Gale did dwell on it because she could not dismiss it from her mind. The evening was spoilt by it, for she fairly squirmed inside. And now and then she would glance around, watching faces and expressions whenever anyone happened to look her way. What were they thinking? she asked herself, and she would have to lower her head, sure that her colour had risen.
Towards the end of the evening she sat with Tricia, under a potted palm tree in the corner of the room, and they chatted as they sipped their drinks. But Gale was fated once again to overhear Professor Ingham, and this time he was talking to someone whose voice Gale did not recognize, but Tricia told her later that he was a friend of her father and his name was Lawrence Hyatt. The two men were sitting on the other side of a nearby alcove and the girls had no idea they were so close until Dave’s voice was heard.
‘You saw him in Paris? Are you sure? He told his wife he was going to Munich.’
‘Of course I’m sure. I know him well by sight - I was at the barbecue, remember. He was with a blonde.’ ‘He’s only been married a few weeks. Was the girl English?’ ‘Very English.’
‘Julius with a blonde in Paris! Well, well...!’
> Both girls had been speechless up to this point, but now both spoke at once, Tricia saying,
‘Let’s get away from here—’ and Gale, white to the lips, managing a very unsteady,
‘Shall we ... move?’
‘Gale,’ began Tricia when they were some distance away from where they had been sitting, ‘take no notice. It isn’t true. You know what men are when they get talking ...!’ Her voice trailed off' as she became aware of how futile her efforts at comfort were.
‘Of course it’s true.’ Gale’s voice was scarcely audible. She felt almost physically ill and would have given anything to be transported into her own room at home, where she could hide away and not let anyone see this cloak of sheer misery that had wrapped itself around her on hearing those words uttered.
Julius in Paris - the gay city of story and song. Julius in Paris ... with a blonde. Was the blonde’s name Daphne?
Or was her husband with some other girl?’ Gale thought of her father and of Malcolm and Trevis - and she hated all men! Yes, all of them.
‘None of them are any good,’ she quivered, talking to herself. Tears fought for release, but Gale remembered all at once that this was her friend’s party and she made a supreme effort to hold them back, succeeding only after she had rubbed her eyes hard so that the moisture had been pressed on to her fingers.
‘I’m so sorry.’ Tricia herself seemed almost distracted. ‘I don’t know what to say.’
‘There’s nothing to say. Let’s forget it! Shall we have another drink?’
‘I’m sure there must be some mistake,’ persisted Tricia. ‘Why can’t we go and speak to those two and find out what that friend of Father’s really meant?’ ‘There’s been no mistake. As for speaking to them—’ Gale swallowed hard. ‘That’s the last thing I’d do.’ She looked mistily at her friend. ‘You know the circumstances of our marriage, so it’s no use my pretending that Julius is in love with me.’
Tricia stared in bewilderment.
‘Then why did he marry you? Oh, I know all about your mother, and the way she felt - you told me all that at the time. But Julius had no need to marry you.
There must have been some attraction. Besides, everybody used to notice how he looked at you. And I do know that at one party he told Professor Ingham that there was only one attractive girl in the whole place, and it was you. Yes, there was some good reason for his marrying you, no matter what you say about his not being in love with you.’ Tricia believed she was helping, and only realized her mistake when Gale, feeling there was no need for the least secrecy or restraint now
- after what Tricia had overheard - told her that the only appeal she had for Julius was that of desire.
‘Greeks are notorious for it,’ she went on huskily. ‘I’ve learned things since living in their country. They scarcely ever marry for love. A man sees a girl he desires and promptly begins negotiations with her parents for a marriage. It’s all purely sex, nothing else. Greek men are the most amorous in the world - and that should answer you if nothing else did.’
Tricia could not at first find anything to say to this and she merely stood there, a most troubled frown on her pretty face.
‘If this is true, then I feel more blameworthy than ever,’ she sighed at last, an appeal for pardon in her anxious eyes.
‘It’s not your fault,’ Gale declared firmly, urged by the need for complete honesty. ‘I wanted to marry him.’'
Another silence fell, with Tricia staring at her friend as she tried to assess the real meaning of Gale’s admission.
‘You were in love with him, all the time?’ she queried unbelievingly. ‘But you always swore you’d never fall in love. When did you first know?’
Gale moistened her lips. She was aware that one or two people were glancing their way, and because of what she had overheard she felt positive those glances held a thinly-veiled hint of amusement. She squirmed again and wished with all her heart she had not allowed impulse to bring her to England. Yet the next second she admitted she was glad she had learned about her husband’s perfidy. She had no wish to be in the position of the trusting wife who was being betrayed without her knowledge. Far better to be in possession of the facts so that from now on she could arm herself against his charms. Dejection and sheer misery lay as a dead weight upon her as the future spread itself before her vision. No more lovemaking because she would refuse, and this of course meant the beginning of the end. Julius would undoubtedly find pleasure elsewhere.
‘I didn’t fall in love,’ Gale admitted, jerked from her reverie by a small movement made by Tricia as a sign that she awaited an answer to her question. ‘We both -both married for the same reason. ’
Tricia blinked.
‘I don’t believe it!’ she exclaimed. ‘Men marry for that reason, I’ll grant you — and perhaps as you say this is the case with most Greek men - but women never do!’
Gale had to smile in spite of her misery.
‘You’re not very realistic, Tricia. Women do. But they rarely admit it.’
‘I think you fell in love with him,’ stated Tricia, ignoring this. ‘I know I should have, had the handsome, magnificent Julius Spiridon given me any attention. Why, you know very well that all the girls used to be crazy about him!’
‘I didn’t fall in love with him,’ Gale denied. ‘It was a physical attraction on both sides, and we knew from the first that it wouldn’t last.’ She was speaking for Julius as well as herself, because she was firmly of the belief that she spoke the truth. ‘It’s ended sooner than I expected, and that’s why I’m feeling so shattered. Never mind, though,’ she added, managing to insert a lightness into her voice, ‘the sooner the break the quicker the mend. Come on, I’m dying for a drink!’
CHAPTER NINE
Gale often wondered afterwards how she managed to remain at the Sims’ for that week-end, adopting a lightness which none other than Tricia knew was on the surface only. And when it was time to leave Gale felt no better; she was going home to a father who did not care whether she was there or not, who would go out each evening and leave her alone. Still, there were only two such evenings to get over. After that her mother would be back home.
‘Thought you were staying away until tomorrow,’ snapped her father on coming home to a prepared meal and a glowing fire, which Gale had lighted because she herself had been icy cold all day.
‘I said it depended on how I felt.’
‘So it didn’t come up to expectations—’ He stopped suddenly and again she noticed that sharp intake of his breath, and its heaviness afterwards. Her eyes flickered over his face, but he looked to be in perfect health and she made no remark on what she had observed.
‘I felt like coming home,’ she told him.
‘Well, I suppose you know what you want. By the time your mother returns it’ll be time for you to be leaving again.’
She nodded, but reminded him that she did have three days. She had initially had the urge to go home earlier than planned, just to satisfy herself that Daphne was not on the island. Should she be away, then it would be clear who was the blonde Julius was with; should she be at
home, then it would mean that Julius
had yet another woman in tow - a woman who was also a blonde. But Gale checked the impulse to return to Patmos. She had come all this way specifically to see her mother and it was not very sensible to leave England without having at least a couple of days with her. Besides, she hoped to find her mother in a more communicative mood than previously. She hoped to learn more about this Jack, and whether he had been her mother’s companion on the holiday.
Gale’s hopes were to materialize, for after recovering from her surprise at finding her daughter at home waiting for her, Mrs. Davis opened up and talked. Gale learned that Jack had in fact been with her mother in Cornwall, but they had stayed in adjoining hotels.
‘He paid for your holiday?’
‘Yes, everything.’ A pause and then, anxiously, and in the old rather deprecating manner, ‘
You’re condemning me?’
‘I’m not your judge,’ replied Gale promptly. ‘I think you’ve been a saint up till now. In any case, you’ve just said you stayed in separate hotels.’
‘Yes, we did, and that’s the truth. Jack’s an honourable man. He knows how I feel about these modern ways and he understands.’
Gale smiled inwardly. How long would he understand, as her mother put it? He was a man - and that was sufficient for Gale to fasten the tag of insincerity upon him. She looked into her mother’s glowing face and sighed. So innocent still, and so trusting. Heartache must come, and Gale could have wept for her.
‘Tell me some more about him, darling,’ she pressed. ‘What does he look like? Is he a bachelor or a widower?’ Probably married, her hardened heart added as a bitter light entered Gale’s lovely eyes.
‘He’s been a widower for eight years, and never bothered with another woman until he met me three years ago.’
What a story! Gale said, successfully hiding her cynicism,
‘How old is he?’
‘Forty-eight. And he’s as handsome as your Julius -almost. He’s tall and stately ... and he doesn’t drink,’ Mrs. Davis added significantly.
‘His wife? Does he ever mention her?’
‘He did once, and what I thought was so very nice,’ went on Mrs. Davis with a smile reminiscent of a naive teenager, ‘was that he spoke affectionately of her. They were in love right to the end. He says that she knew for about a year that she was going to die and made him promise that he would marry again someday. He promised, just to please her, but he had no intention of doing so ... not until he met me. But of course we can never marry. ... ’ The low sweet voice trailed away to a sad silence and Gale found her throat blocked by a hurtful little lump which she could not dislodge. Presently, however, she did manage to ask what her mother’s plans were.