by Jane Stain
He gave Jessica an absent-minded smile of thanks.
She shook her head and moved over to sit next to him on Amena's bedside.
"I wull carry a chamber pot up and doon the stairs for her. She needs tae bide in bed and rest. I wull bide with her. Ye go doon tae the village."
At first Leif looked grateful, but then his face changed to dismay, and Jessica could see in his eyes all the progress he had made drilling the men in the art of war going down the drain.
"I canna ask ye tae dae that. She's my sister. I should be watching her."
Jessica stroked Amena's hair back from her forehead the way Leif had been doing.
"Nonsense. This is what I trained tae dae. Ye go on tae the village. I wull take care o' her. 'Tis nay trouble at all, I promise."
When she looked up into his face and held his gaze firmly, brooking no argument, he looked back at her with admiration.
“Ye are a fine lass, Jessica. Dae ye ken that?”
Naw. Katherine is fine. I’m average looking. You’re just flattering me.
But he was still looking at her.
Jessica hadn't felt this self-conscious since middle school, when she'd sat behind Steve Lawson in math class. Steve was the guy all the girls whispered about in the hallway as he went by. He ran on the track team, and his long limbs and cute face had all the girls sighing over him. And Steve was nice, not stuck up like most gorgeous guys. He always smiled at her when he turned around to pass papers back, and this had affected her like Leif was affecting her now, only with far less excuse.
But of course Steve had a girlfriend at the time, Stephanie Watts. Stephanie wasn’t in math class with them, but she had minions everywhere. Most of Stephanie’s minions were guys, Jessica was convinced, because no other girls had been looking when Jessica finally got up the courage to smile back at Steve one time when he was passing papers back to her.
But somehow, word had gotten back to Stephanie.
At lunch that day, Jessica was turning around with her lunch tray after just paying when she unaccountably tripped over nothing. This splattered food all over her brand-new trendy outfit that Mom had cut corners to buy for her after much begging. And it was spaghetti with extra red sauce.
Jessica's tears had been for her mother's loss of the money she had spent on the outfit for nothing, but no one else understood that. They all pointed at her and laughed, thinking she was crying because of the embarrassment. Stupid losers.
Stephanie had stood there pointing and laughing the loudest with a glint in her eye that told Jessica this had not been an accident at all.
That was what happened when Jessica set her sights on a man much more good-looking than she was: sorrow and loss, people she loved getting hurt.
The look on Leif’s face reminded her so much of Steve's smile when he turned to pass papers to her that Jessica had to close her eyes for a moment and escape the intensity. It wasn't fair that good-looking men had so much power over women.
But she opened her eyes and gave Leif a nurse’s sympathetic smile. It was all she could manage.
Giving her his own dazzling smile in return, Leif backed out of the room.
Senga came in with the willow bark tea.
Jessica helped the little girl drink it, then stayed with Amena all day and into the evening, wiping the girl’s hot forehead with cool cloths, taking her full bedpans downstairs to the water closet, bringing her cool water and more tea to drink and warm broth to eat — and getting absolutely no rest for herself.
She heard Leif and the other men return to Cresh Manor from the village just after dark, telling herself she hadn’t been listening for her own sake, but for Amena’s. She heard him go into the kitchen, heard his solid footfalls on the stairs.
He came in with three tankards of broth, looking absolutely stunning with the sheen of battle practice on his muscles. He handed Jessica hers, and then looking down at his sister's fitfully sleeping face, he put Amena’s broth on the washstand.
"How is she?"
Guilt assaulted Jessica. Here he was worried sick about his sister, and in her sleep-deprived state, all she wanted to do was ogle him.
"Her fever still burns as hot as ever. I fear for her life. She’s sae hot, I'm afraid tae leave her side even tae empty her bedpan or go get water for her, lest the absence o' my cooling her forehead cause her permanent damage. I'm sae sorry."
Still looking into his sister's face, Leif took Jessica's hand and squeezed it warmly.
“Dinna fash. This is na on ye. ‘Tis grateful I am. Now ye need rest. We will by turns stay with her while ye sleep. Go on tae bed with ye now. Ye can hae my parents’ room. I will na hear otherwise."
Wanting to tell him no but too tired to put up much resistance, Jessica did as she was told, walking down the hall into his parents’ old room, sinking into their clean feather bed, and falling asleep as soon as she pulled the quilt up to her nose.
The next five days went much as that last one had, with Jessica tending to Amena all her waking hours and only going to bed herself when Leif ordered her to.
And then one night, Jessica woke up dripping in sweat and threw the covers off.
“Hey!” Lauren exclaimed next to her. “What’s the big idea?”
But when Lauren gave Jessica a playful shove of protest at having the covers ripped off her in the middle of the night, she stopped and put a hand on Jessica’s forehead.
“Oh no, Jessica. Now that Amena’s getting better, you’re getting sick.”
“Don’t drink out of my tankard,” Jessica mumbled in warning as she turned over. They needed to know how to avoid getting sick. But she was so exhausted, she couldn’t say any more.
Lauren and Katherine worked something out between them, and soon Jessica felt a soothing cool cloth on her forehead. But she couldn’t be bothered to pay attention to who was holding it. She drifted back into blissful sleep.
Later, she thought she heard something at the window.
A rustling of the furs.
A man’s cry of pain.
A thud.
But she fell back asleep and forgot all about it.
Chapter 12
Leif nocked another arrow, then struck his fist against his chest and out to Gilly below in thanks for the birdcall warning. The druids were getting braver, once more attacking right here at the manor in the dark of night and no longer waiting for the lasses in the woods.
He missed the closeness he had shared with Jessica before she took ill, even while he marveled at how her methods had made Amena well. Realizing he was staring up at the window where she slept, he turned and resumed his patrol, smiling at one particular memory of the time he had spent with her.
The men had finished fighter practice early one afternoon and come home to find the lasses seated at the hearth in the great room passing the time until supper. Leif was looking at Jessica longingly when he discovered he had an unexpected ally.
Katherine looked up and winked at Leif. He had to close his eyes and open them again. She smiled, so she really had winked at him. What was she on about?
And then to his delight, he found out.
Apparently, non-warriors also had signals, because Jessica understood what Katherine was on about and glanced over Leif's way.
Now was his chance. He smiled with a guilty look on his face. He knew she was keeping Lauren company during one of that lass’s awkward and withdrawn moments when Lauren stared into the distance as if hearing voices. Yet he wished for Jessica to keep him company.
At the first hint of uncertainty on Jessica's face, he tilted his head in the direction he wished her to go.
She gave him a beautifully bashful smile of her own, and by this he knew she too wished they were together. But then she gave him a look of regret and started to turn back to Lauren.
But then Katherine pushed Jessica again and did her own head nod over in Leif's direction.
Leif would bless Katherine, anyway he could.
Because Jessica got u
p and headed over to Leif.
Now for a plan of action. It was anyone’s guess how much time he would get with her, so he had to make the most of it. What was the most important thing for him to find about her so that they could be together even if she had to leave with her friends?
The answer was upsetting, because it was the one bit of information the lasses had been unwilling to give. Their tale of coming from the future was braw, but where were they truly from?
So that was the plan. Ask the lass to reveal her best protected secret.
The lass in question was all smiles as she got up from her seat near the hearth and approached him there at the front door to the manor, her eyes sparkling with as much joy as he himself felt at the prospect of her company. When she neared him, he opened the door and turned to walk with her.
Side-by-side, they left the house and walked toward the sun that was setting over the fields in the valley below, its rays peeking out from below the clouds to reveal all the thistles hidden amid clumps of grass.
Her voice was wistful.
"I can see why Lauren wanted tae come here. ‘Tis sae beautiful my heart breaks just looking at it."
Without even meaning to, she'd given him an opportunity.
"Surely the sun sets where ye hail from as well?"
She met his gaze, and while he did his best to make his face patient, hers was puzzling. It conveyed the sense of ‘Aye, ye would think as much, howsoever…’
This made more sense when she spoke, but not much more.
"We hae what is called ‘pollution’. The best I can explain it is tae say smoke fills the air all the time, even when there are na fires. Some say it makes the sunsets even more beautiful. It does give them a strange orange haze. But in na way dae they compare tae this. This is… I hae heard the word ‘breathtaking’ used afore and always thought 'twas ridiculous, but this? This merits the word ‘breathtaking.’ I want tae hold my breath and just look at it, hoping that my breath willna dispel it faster than ‘twill go away all on its own."
He had no excuse to move closer to her this time. She wasn't in any danger, not from others nor from herself, clumsy as she was. It wasn't especially cold yet.
Good.
He wanted her to realize his desire to be close to her.
Not taking his eyes off the setting sun just as she wasn’t, he sidled up next to her and put his arm around her shoulders, drawing her close to him in a sideways embrace that rivaled the sunset in its intensity.
She relaxed into his embrace, surrendering herself to his outright affection.
Because of this, he knew. He knew she enjoyed his company, his touch, his embrace. Knowing this, he could withstand anything their journey might bring.
Almost anything.
"I need tae be able tae find ye, lass, if the coming time o' battles should separate us. I ken ye dinna want tae tell me yer homeland, and I respect that ye hae reasons, but give me a hint. Tell me some aught that will help me find ye again. I would never be lost from ye. I would enjoy this togetherness the rest o' oor days.”
She puzzled him again. He expected hesitation. No secret was kept this long and then given up easily. But he didn't expect hopelessness, and that was the message her drooping posture conveyed, even before her words were uttered.
“We already hae telt ye. We are from the future.”
“Jessica, that tale is a fine bit o' fun, but ye canna expect me tae believe it. If ye dinna want me tae find ye, just say sae. It will be easier on both o' us—"
Jessica groaned violently at the sunset.
"When we foremaist met, ye telt me ye were willing tae accept there were things ye didna ken. Are ye? Or perchance ye wull live yer life thinking ye ken everything."
Leif sighed.
"I would spend every moment o' every day cajoling with ye as we are now, but as Captain, some o’ my time must be spent making the militia ready for what is coming."
There was nothing else to say unless she yielded, and so they stood there arm in arm until the sky grew dark and it was time to go inside.
Chapter 13
After a fitful sleep and a hasty meal at a table that once more had a hale and hearty Amena but now lacked Jessica, Leif heaved a deep sigh as he put his hand on the door to his parents’ old room. He couldn’t stand seeing Jessica this way, feverish and sickly. He felt responsible somehow. She had been so lively, so full of ideas, hope, and compassion.
But he was no coward, so he pushed the door open and strode in resolutely.
"Go tae yer bed now, Katherine. Ye hae been with her half a day, and ye need tae rest. I wull take ower. I wish tae speak with her when she wakes next anyhow."
"Verra well. I wull leave her tae ye. But ye ken na tae tire her with questions, aye?"
Already busy cooling Jessica's hot forehead with a damp cloth, Leif nodded, not looking Katherine’s way when he answered her.
"Aye, dinna fash."
At long last, Katherine left, and Leif was alone with the sleeping Jessica. He was content to just watch her sleep, and he did this for hours on end, cooling her forehead.
But after he'd been there a few hours, he started to talk to her, to tell her all the things he had been keeping from her because, up to now, in his mind she had been an outsider. That had changed when Amena recovered after Jessica had so devotedly tended to her.
"Na all the people support the Wolf o' Badenoch’s uncle Robert Stewart as king, ye ken. His claim is contested by his cousin Donald o' Islay, Laird o' the Isles, who sees the lands claimed by Stewart through marriage as rightly his own. Aye, the conflict is getting serious, and I fear there will be a large battle soon. Every day I look out tae the west in dread o' the Wolf's messenger calling us tae battle. He soon will. I had hoped ye and yer friends would move on afore this happened and I wouldna hae tae explain it tae ye, and now I dinna ken how tae tell ye—"
Jessica's eyes opened.
"Ye needna worry about telling me. Ye already hae."
"Jessica! How much did ye hear?"
“All o' it, I think. It doesna surprise me, though. I kenned ye had tae be drilling for some aught. How soon is soon, for the battle, I mean? And how long hae I been abed? I need tae get up. Feels like I hae been abed a week."
She moved to get up.
But he put a hand on her shoulder and held her down. Gently, but firmly. And gave her the very speech he had heard her give Amena.
"Ye hae been abed a week, but ye will na get up. I forbid it. Ye are still burning up with fever. 'Tis a good sign that ye hae lasted this long, fever or nay. Most people who come doon sick dinna last this long. Sae ken that ye are strong and that the chances o' ye pulling through are good — sae long as ye keep tae yer bed and sleep as much as ye can and eat the food Senga brings ye."
Obediently, Jessica closed her eyes and relaxed back into the bed. Slowly but surely, she drifted back into her fitful sleep and then looked like an angel lying there in peace.
Once more, Leif had the urge to tell her his secrets.
"I'm falling in love with ye, Jessica, sae ye hae tae live. If ye choose tae go haime, then I will help ye dae that. I hope ye choose tae bide with me, howsoever I shall serve ye nay matter what. Ye are the brawest and most compassionate lass I ever did meet."
Chapter 14
When Jessica awoke, Lauren was sitting on the side of the bed, dabbing Jessica’s forehead with a wet cloth. Her eyes looked worried, and her voice was full of anguish.
"’Tis so sorry I am, Jessica. I didna ken ‘twas gaun'ae be like this. They lied tae me, said time travel would be easy and painless."
And then Lauren was quiet again, but this time her face looked fierce while she struggled with whatever haunted her.
Jessica found she didn't have much energy at all to speak, but speak she would.
"What's going on with ye, Lauren? when ye are quiet like that, what are ye thinking? Ye look as if ye are talking tae somebody. Dae they hae some sort o’ magic phone ye are using? I'm dying here. Ye
must tell me."
Lauren’s face filled with tears, and she leaned over and hugged Jessica where she lay in the bed, putting her cool hands against Jessica's face. It felt heavenly.
"I am talking tae somebody, the same somebody who brought us here.”
Lauren choked up then, probably overcome by her feelings of guilt at having put Jessica’s life in danger.
Jessica patted her friend’s hand to let her know she didn’t blame her. The world felt so big now, and lying in this bed wracked with fever, Jessica felt so lost. Grasping at straws to find what had distressed her friend so, her addled mind searched for a sensible solution to Lauren’s problem of finding an artifact for the druids, telling her there had to be one.
"But Lauren, wouldna it be easier if we just went back tae the druid castle? Why did we come here? Why na just go back there?"
At the same time as Jessica asked this, the door opened and Leif was there.
Lauren started to get up.
"I was just leaving. I'll let ye two—"
But Leif's face was hard, and he put his hand up.
"Nay, ‘tis best if ye stay, and I go."
He whirled around and rushed out of the room and down the stairs.
Though she had been groggy and sleepy a moment before, this brought Jessica wide awake. The man she had become attached to was angry because of something she had said. He had misunderstood! She needed to explain.
For a moment, she fought the covers, trying to get out of bed to go after him.
Why had she been so stupid? She didn't want to go to the druid castle. She wanted to stay here with him. She’d just been working out different solutions in her mind and saying out loud what she was thinking. She had dismissed that particular thought as soon as she uttered it.
What must he be thinking?
Dread pulled her down like a lead weight, and she gave in, no longer trying to get up. He wouldn’t listen to her. He would think she was involved with the druids who had caused his parents’ sickness. And Amena’s.