by Judy Duarte
Of course, nothing about their relationship had ever been easy.
“Your parents probably wanted to string me up,” he said.
“They didn’t know. About any of it.”
“You went through that alone?”
“Not completely. One day, I went to the Rensfield estate looking for you, but Brad told me you weren’t home. I started crying, and he asked why it was so important for me to find you.”
“Did you tell him?”
“Yes, and then I fell apart. He held me while I cried and promised to take care of everything.”
“He suggested the abortion?”
She nodded. “He even paid for it out of his allowance so my parents wouldn’t find out. But instead of feeling better, I felt worse. It was only recently that I was able to forgive myself. And I came to you to ask you to forgive me. It seems like the right thing to do.”
That’s one of the things he didn’t like about Brad. The guy would mess up, then buy his way out of it. This time, he’d stepped in and offered Shana an easy way out. And she’d been desperate, vulnerable.
Now, as he saw the emotion welling in her eyes, she appeared vulnerable again. And just as alone.
It tore him up to see her that way. How could he blame her for a decision she’d made seven years ago, even if he should have had a say about it?
He wanted to slip his arms around her, to hold her close, but the chain link stood in the way, just as her parents and their cultural and economic differences always had. But fences didn’t have to be permanent.
Rather than taking the time to walk back to the dugout and open the gate, he hopped over the railing, wrapped his arms around her, and drew her close.
He’d meant to offer her compassion as well as forgiveness, but when he caught a whiff of her soft floral scent, when she fit into his arms in a way that no one else ever had, he brushed his lips across hers—softly, tenderly.
She kissed him back, and when common sense returned and he pulled away, her gaze locked on his. “Is it too late for us?”
Maybe. He refused to put himself in a position where he had to prove himself worthy of anyone’s love.
“A lot’s happened in the past seven years,” he explained. “For one thing, I’m going to be a foster parent to two boys. So that in itself would complicate our lives, especially if your parents—”
She placed her fingertips over his lips, silencing him with a gentle touch. “It’s not about my parents. It’s about us. And if those boys are a part of your life, then it’s about them, too.”
Something in her eyes told him that she was willing to fight this time around. That the risk he’d be taking might be worth it.
“Those boys are lucky to have you,” she added. “And I’d be lucky to have you, too. Is there any chance at all that we could start over?”
There might be some rough spots along the way, but he would try his best to forgive and forget.
He slipped his arms around her waist and pulled her close. “I was a fool to let you walk away once, Shana. But it won’t happen again.”
Chapter 19
Craig slept better than he had since coming to Fairbrook, although he wasn’t sure why. Maybe because he was looking forward to a full and productive day that would wrap up tonight following the meeting he’d scheduled with the board of elders.
Ramon had called a practice this morning, and Craig had volunteered to help unless something came up, which it had. After Renee’s accident last night, Craig had decided to stop by the hospital before doing anything else.
He knew Ramon would understand.
Now there was a man who followed his heart and put his faith in action. Not only had Ramon given his time to help kids with two strikes against them already, but he’d also offered to take Luis and Carlitos into his home, which was a lot of responsibility for a single young man to assume.
Ramon, it seemed, had a calling, and he’d taken the ball and run with it. Craig wished he could say that he was doing what he was meant to do with his life—and doing it well. But he didn’t think he’d ever be the man his granddad was.
As Craig left the den and approached the kitchen, the rich aroma of coffee and the sound of water gurgling through the filter and into the carafe grew stronger.
“Good morning,” he said to Daniel, who stood before the cupboard, reaching for a mug.
Daniel glanced over his shoulder and smiled. “It is a good morning, isn’t it?”
As far as Craig was concerned, the jury was still out on that. But at least the storm had passed. “How did things go last night?”
“It was bit rough at first, but I think Cassie is resigned to the change my leaving the firm will make in our lives.”
“That’s good to hear.”
Daniel removed two mugs from the shelf and handed one to Craig. “You’ll never guess what we did last night.”
Craig didn’t have a clue. When he’d gotten home from the hospital, the house had been empty.
Fortunately, Daniel didn’t intend for Craig to actually guess. “Cassie, Shana, and I had dinner with a homeless man, if you can imagine that. What an interesting experience.”
“Was his name Jesse?”
Daniel reached for the carafe and filled his mug with coffee. “How did you know?”
“I met him, too.” Craig held out his cup, and watched Daniel fill it. “He’s unique, isn’t he?”
Daniel nodded. “He gave each of us something to think about.”
Jesse had given Craig a few things to consider, too. But instead of providing any solid answers, he usually left Craig with more questions to ponder. “He’s an ace at making a point in as few words as possible.”
“I know what you mean. Last night, after dinner, Cassie, Shana and I decided to volunteer at the soup kitchen on Sundays so that Joe and Dawn can have a day off.”
“I’m sure they’ll appreciate that.”
“Jesse also suggested that I talk to you about me speaking on behalf of the church at the next city council meeting, as well as any upcoming hearings. So all you need to do is say the word. During my transition, I’ll have a lot more time on my hands.”
“A respected attorney who knows how to make a convincing argument will be a valuable addition,” Craig said. “And as a side note, there’s a special meeting with the board of elders at five tonight. If you can join us, that would be great. But if not, I’ll fill you in when I get home.”
“I’ll try to make it.” Daniel strode to the sliding glass door that led to the patio and rolled open the shutters, letting in the morning sun. “I’m also going to meet with Todd Forrester this afternoon. He’s involved in a nonprofit group that encourages underprivileged kids to participate in sports. Most of their parents are incarcerated, so they’re all at risk. And by getting involved in that particular organization, I might be able to make a difference beyond the courtroom.”
“I’ve heard about that group,” Craig said. “There’s a baseball team in Fairbrook that’s part of the intercity league, and their first game is on Wednesday night. I’m probably going to help coach them.” Craig took a sip of his coffee. “That’s something else Jesse put into motion. He can be pretty convincing with his thought-provoking, heart-searching comments.”
“Jesse’s not the only one who tosses around things to think about,” Daniel added. “Thanks again for telling me to follow my heart. It’s made a big difference in my life.”
“You’re welcome, but it was just a comment.”
“People don’t always need a sermon, Pastor. Sometimes they just need somebody to listen and to care.” Daniel took a sip of his coffee. “We still have a lot to work through as a family, but I think we’re all on the same page now.”
“I’m glad.” Too bad Craig couldn’t apply that same follow-your-heart advice to his own life. He would, if he could, but he wasn’t sure what his heart was telling him to do. Each time he tried to examine what felt good and right and true, Kristy came to mind.
> “Do you suppose you could find time to talk to Cassandra sometime this week?” Daniel asked.
“I’ve got some things to do this morning and I’m booked tight this afternoon, but I’m sure we can find time to talk after dinner.”
“Not here at the house,” Daniel said. “Cassie wants some pastoral counseling. She could make an appointment with George, but she’d rather talk to you.”
The fact that Cassandra would choose Craig over the senior pastor took him by surprise, but he nodded as though it made perfect sense.
“It’s not like she needs any long-term counseling,” Daniel said, “but I think a chat like the one you had with me would do her a world of good. She’s been living under her father’s thumb for years and needs to follow the beat of her own drum for a change. Besides, Jesse told her you’d be the perfect one for her to talk to.”
While Craig appreciated Jesse’s faith in him, he still couldn’t quite embrace it. For as long as he could remember, he’d been trying to live up to the larger-than-life standards his dad and his granddad had set, yet he’d somehow fallen out of step, and his heart just wasn’t in it. But that was his secret and not something he would or could admit to anyone.
“I’ll talk to Cassandra at dinner,” Craig said. “We can make an appointment to meet at the church whenever it’s convenient.”
“Good.” Daniel unlocked the door that led to the patio. “I’m going to drink my coffee outside. Do you want to join me?”
“Sure.” But before Craig could take two steps, his cell phone rang.
When he answered, he recognized Kristy’s voice on the line and found himself smiling.
“Is there any chance you could stop by the house today?” she asked. “My grandmother would really like to talk to you.”
“Sure. I’ll stop after I visit Renee at the hospital.”
“Good. How’s she doing?”
“I’m not sure. I think I’ll give Dawn a call. She’ll probably be able to give me an update.”
“Tell Renee that I’ll try to stop by this afternoon, if I can get someone to sit with Gram and Jason.”
“I will.” Craig glanced at the clock on the microwave. “But it probably won’t be until noon or later.”
“Thanks, Craig. I really appreciate that.”
When the call ended, he disconnected the line, yet his thoughts remained on Kristy.
He’d told Daniel to follow his heart. And Ramon seemed to be following his. Maybe Craig ought to do the same thing—but not in a selfish, I-want/I-need sort of way. Instead, he would listen to his conscience and trust the Word of God.
As wrought iron scraped against concrete, Craig glanced outside and saw Daniel pulling out a patio chair so he could sit at the glass-topped table. Before joining him, Craig would call Dawn. If Renee had lost the baby, Craig wanted a heads-up before dropping by the hospital.
After three rings, Joe’s voice answered.
“Hey, it’s Craig. Is Dawn available?”
“Not at the moment. The obstetrician is in Renee’s room right now, so I stepped out to give them privacy.”
“How’s it going?”
“The doctor wants to keep her one more day as a precaution, but labor has stopped, thank goodness. And he said the baby is fine.”
“That’s good news. Tell Renee that I’m coming by to visit her later this morning.”
“By the way,” Joe said. “I’d like to thank you.”
“For what?”
“Working a miracle in our lives.”
Craig had no idea what he might have said or done that would cause Joe to make that kind of assumption. “What do you mean?”
“You told Dawn that the baby wasn’t the only one who needed a mother, and it set her to thinking. I’ve got a call into Sam Dawson, the attorney who handled my uncle’s probate. We’re going to have him handle the legalities.”
“What legalities?”
“Dawn and I are going to adopt Renee, and we couldn’t be happier. It’s a dream come true for all of us. That poor kid hasn’t had a very good life so far, but Dawn and I are determined to give her the loving home she deserves. It’s a blessing for all of us.”
Craig could see why he’d consider that a miracle, but Craig had only made an observation. The miracle had happened when the Randolphs took his comment to heart and decided to do something about it. “I’m glad everything worked out.”
When the call ended, Craig no longer had a pressing reason to rush to the hospital. So, under the circumstances, if Lorraine wanted to see him, he probably ought to swing by her house first. At least, that’s the excuse he gave himself for bypassing the practice at Mulberry Park and altering the schedule he’d planned for today.
But there’d been no explanation for plucking a red rose bud from the bush in the Delacourts’ front yard and taking it with him.
Kristy ignored the doorbell the first time it rang and, expecting Jason to answer, continued to wash the breakfast dishes. When it gonged again, she called her son’s name, assuming that one of his friends wanted to play.
Still no response.
So she dropped the dishcloth into the sink full of warm, soapy water and headed to the entry.
She called Jason one last time, realizing he was probably in the bathroom and unable to hear her, and continued to the entry.
Needless to say, when she swung open the door and spotted Craig on the porch, her jaw dropped and her heart skipped a beat.
“I’m early,” he said.
He certainly was. She wished she’d done more than clip her hair up, that she’d put on something other than worn jeans and a faded yellow T-shirt. That she’d slipped on a pair of shoes. Dabbed a splash of perfume on her wrists. Swiped a bit of lipstick on her lips.
He held a rose in his hand, which she assumed he’d brought for Gram. It was a deep, burgundy red, and she suspected he’d gotten it from someone’s garden.
A boyish grin dimpled his cheeks, softening the sharp angles of a masculine jaw. “I had a change of schedule. I hope that’s okay.”
“Of course. It’s fine.” She stepped aside and allowed him into the living room.
He surprised her by handing her the rose. “I saw this growing in the Delacourts’ front yard and thought you’d like it.”
She took the stem, trying not to grab a thorn, and her pulse slipped into overdrive. “Thank you.”
The gesture was both unexpected and sweet, and on impulse, she took a deep whiff, savoring the heady fragrance.
“I’d still like to take you out to dinner tonight,” he said, “so I hope you’ve reconsidered.”
There were a lot of reasons why she should decline, but right this moment, with Craig’s gaze locked on hers and pheromones swirling overhead, she couldn’t seem to think of a single one.
“I know you’re concerned about what people might think or say, but I don’t care in the least. If anyone has any qualms about us dating, they need a refresher course in forgiveness and second chances.”
He made it sound so easy that she couldn’t help believing that it was. “I’d have to find someone to stay with Gram and Jason.”
“See what you can do. If no one is available, I’ll bring dinner here.”
“You drive a hard bargain.”
“I want to spend more time with you, Kristy, and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make that happen.” He tossed her another grin, and her mind scrambled to think of someone she could ask, someone who wouldn’t think she was overstepping neighborly expectations.
Ellie Rucker, who lived across the street, might not mind, although it might be too much for her.
“What did your grandmother want to talk to me about?” Craig asked.
“She said she has a message for you.”
“From whom?”
“An imaginary Jesse, I think. He was here one evening, but she’d been asleep when he arrived, and he left before morning. She mentioned a dream she’d had about a bearded stranger, so I think she must
have really talked to him that time. But since he hasn’t been here since then, last’s night’s visit must have been a dream. When she woke up, she insisted upon talking to you. So humor her, okay?”
“All right.”
Kristy nodded toward the hallway. “Come on, I’ll take you to her.”
As they approached her grandmother’s bedroom, Kristy called out, “Gram? Pastor Craig is here to see you.”
Gram turned her head and looked toward the doorway. She brightened when she spotted the handsome minister enter behind Kristy. “Thanks for coming.”
“How are you feeling?” Craig asked.
“Tired of being in bed and unable to move, but I’ve come to realize my dancing days are over.”
Kristy moved to the foot of the bed, allowing Craig to stand at Gram’s side.
“You might think I’m daffy,” Gram told the man, “but I can’t help that. I’ve been having this recurring dream, and last night it was especially real.”
“Kristy mentioned that. So why don’t you tell me about it.”
“All right. The strange thing is that each time I’ve had the dream I was lying in this very bed. It’s almost as if a longhaired, bearded man really is standing at the foot of my bed, just like Kristy is now.”
“What did he look like?” Craig asked.
“His hair and beard were stringy and mostly gray. And his eyes were the color of a summer sky. He wore old clothes, but he had on a new blue jacket that looked a lot like the one I’d given my late husband before he died.”
“Did the man tell you his name?”
“He never introduced himself. Why do you ask?”
Craig glanced at Kristy, then back at Gram. “I was just wondering.”
“Anyway, when he came to me again last night, he had a message for you.”
A hint of skepticism clouded Craig’s eyes, but Kristy could understand why. If Jesse really had a message, he would have come right out and told Craig face-to-face.
“He had a message for me?” Craig asked.
Gram nodded sagely.
“What was that?”
“He said to tell you that you’ve been following in the wrong footsteps.”