“Come sit,” said Prax, gesturing to a cushion beside him in front of the room’s puja filled with statues of Avaloketishvara, the Buddha Sakyamuni and a naked and fierce dancing dakini. “I won’t bite.”
She moved forward slowly and bowed before the deities before she curled her maroon robe under her and sat cross-legged on the cushion, clearly nervous about what might happen next.
“Don’t worry; we will take things slowly, at your pace. I can tell you are nervous. I suggest you take a moment to focus your mind and body. As you are no doubt aware, Edenoi philosophy borrows a great deal from both Buddhism and Greek philosophy. We understand that as a result of Alexander the Great’s little foray to the east there was an exchange of ideas. Central to both was the notion of mental discipline. The pleasures of life may be enjoyed to their full, provided you maintain control. The untrained mind is subject to aversions and excesses, to allowing the appetites to take over. The trained mind can sit at a banquet and sample all the delicacies and then stop when they are satiated. The undisciplined mind gorges the stomach and fails to take the time to carefully savour each flavour and appreciate the skill of the gourmand who prepared the food. They are like pigs at the trough, mushing all the flavours together such that they lose all distinction…” He imitated a person grabbing handfuls of food and stuffing their mouths while making ugly, snuffling pig noises. Choejor laughed at his antics. He was glad, her laughter would help release dopamine and help calm her nerves.
After they had meditated together for a short while, and he had detected the change in her breathing, they sat and talked. He asked her about her childhood and gently enquired about her beliefs about men and sex. It was largely as he thought. Like all Earth children she had heard something about the realities but much of it had been kept a secret, with any inappropriate (but natural) curiosity considered taboo and punished. She explained that she was an only child and that her mother had been weakened by her birth and had then had a series of miscarriages. Her father was bitter at not having a son; they were poor. Her mother died when she was six and her father turned to drink. He did not hesitate to send her to a monastery when the opportunity arose – the tradition still existed of sending the first born to enter a religious order. Since then she had lived in a dormitory, where any physical affection or sexual exploration was furtive and suppressed. She knew of girls who snuck into the cots of others late at night to find some comfort, and of the rumours about adolescent monks seeking out boys to indulge in thigh rubbing (rife in some monasteries), but she had kept to herself, in part because of the envy of others. She had proved herself to be gifted in everything she did and found the company of her age peers tedious and in turn they teased her and excluded her. Her circumstances created a simple lack of sexual knowledge, which allowed her imagination to create some seriously false impressions. Her early training as a nun in a celibate order, before Tshentso had miraculously appeared and begun to restore the original teachings, had taught her to try and suppress her erotic imagination. He discussed this with her openly and she eventually conceded that her nerves were really a form of suppressed curiosity and excitement.
“The culture shock works both ways,” he said softly.
“What do you mean?” she said calmly, now fully engaged in the conversation and relaxed in his presence, confident that he had her best interests at heart.
“You Terrans might be shocked at our sexual practices, but we are equally shocked by yours. We cannot understand why you came to fear it so much. It seems to us that a bad idea became a rather bad habit, believed simply because it had always been believed.” He then explained that on Eden children learnt sexual manners and control at an early age. She marvelled when he described his own childhood, how children rarely slept alone, but snuggled with whomever was available, most often with multiple peers or adult members of their parenting circle. This meant they were in constant contact with bodies of all ages and genital play and exploration was indulged as a harmless natural curiosity, often causing amusement rather than moral concern. This meant that every child, male or female, knew in great detail how bodies looked, felt and functioned in every intimate detail. And yet personal boundaries were always respected; sometimes one was not in the mood or was concentrating on other matters. Still, there was a good degree of tolerance of boundary pushing and exploration - one could only learn where the boundaries lay in each individual circumstance by gently pushing at the edges. Besides, if someone said no because they were preoccupied, the next person would likely say yes. The constant exposure to other bodies meant that there were no irrational aversions or compulsions later in life due to suppressed curiosity. He explained that no one ever went without physical comfort and sexual release, and no child was ever denied affection. This built confidence and trust, even amongst strangers. He explained that the reason it was so different on Earth was because the most necessary thing, physical affection, was withheld, and this caused numerous psychological problems: fear, mistrust, lack of control, boundary confusion, compulsion and anger born of frustration and denial.
After that, it became easier than she had foolishly feared. She carefully undressed him and he gently undressed her. He did not act like a beast as she had once been warned. Men could not control their impulses her aunt had told her; they always want to have their way. Her aunt knew because she had been taken by force as a girl. It might have been her fate too if she had not entered the monastery. But Prax had been different in more ways than one. She thought he was ethereally beautiful, totally unlike the short, ruddy Tibetan men she was used to. He was tall, lean, devoid of body hair and impressively equipped. She had almost gasped when she finally saw it, and he laughed, not to mock her, but to laugh with her. He knew that she wanted to touch it and he allowed her with a kind of amused indifference. She touched his whole body, marvelling at his smooth skin. When he gently stroked her in return she felt a sensation she had never felt before. She wanted to get lost in it. She did not pull back when he stroked her inner thigh and her vulva. She felt she was in gentle, patient and experienced hands. When she expressed surprise that he had not become erect he smiled cheekily, “with your permission my lady,” and allowed himself to grow ever larger in her hands until he was as stiff as a rod. He mollified her shock by carefully explaining the mechanism of blood rushing to fill vessels like water filling a flask made of yak bladder, an image that greatly amused her.
She woke with the moonlight shining directly into her eyes through the small, wood framed window. The Kumari had told her that her world had two moons and that one day she would travel there. It filled her with terror and wonder. She trembled a little. She had heard the tales of past wonders, of the great yogis and yoginis who had mastered astral travel and of men who had walked the moon. She dared not think she could number amongst them, yet the Kumari had encouraged her to think it was possible. Of course, she knew that it wasn’t magic. The Kumari had explained the science. The men had flown to the moon in rockets (much bigger than ones she had seen in a fireworks display as a young child) and she would travel to Eden in a special kind of ship that would slip through a crack in the universe. Yet she couldn’t help but see void travel as a kind of astral travel. Khandroma meant ‘sky dancer’ - this was to be her destiny - to fly, to jump from one realm, loka, to another. The Kumari said that current events were merely a preparation for an age of great wonders, and she, little Choejor, would play a significant role.
She snuggled in closer to Prax. He was fast asleep. Normally she would wake around now and walk to the Kumari’s rooms to bathe her. But this morning she was excused. Her duties had changed. Until they departed she was to spend time with the aliens and learn as much as she could. This was dangerous. She had heard the rumours. Not everyone was happy with their arrival; and not everyone was happy with the appearance of the Kumari. The balance of power had shifted and people had lost their influence. There were plots to poison the Kumari, or to compromise in her in some way. So far the Kumari had always
been one step ahead. She had learnt her history, read about the time the sects were at war and the monks fought each other. It might yet happen again and tonight she had chosen a side.
She adjusted her position so that her head was resting on his chest. She pulled the sheets back so that she could admire him in the moonlight. Perhaps this was a dream. She reached for his cock and felt him stir just a little. He was becoming erect as she fondled him. Surely he was awake? She felt a desire begin to burn inside her. She wanted to stimulate him all the way. He must have known. Perhaps he was only pretending to be asleep so that she would somehow feel totally in control. She played with him, intuitively noting the change in his breathing and the gradual tensing of certain muscles. And then it was done. He sighed. She felt the contractions and watched the ojas, the white essence, shoot forth. He did not say anything, instead giving her the privacy to marvel at what had just occurred. If she was to become a true khandroma she must master male sexuality, master ojas. In the Kumari’s tradition, power was obtained by blending the white essence with the red, feminine essence, tejas. Perhaps this was why men feared the dakini, because they were fearless and could control men. In that moment she felt powerful, invincible.
“Where are you going?” he mumbled. He had fallen back to sleep and she had rested, her mind still marvelling at all that had happened, until she saw the faint glow of sunrise.
“The Kumari wants me to accelerate my training with the Heruka, to learn as much from Biyu as I can. She says I must learn to defend myself.”
He nodded and closed his eyes.
She had a quick bath with cold water and a sponge, donned the black trousers and slippers of the Heruka, drank some tea, and rushed to the courtyard. They were already assembled, Biyu watching as the master lead them through a series of stretching exercises. They were all naked, the alien watching every muscle, carefully correcting their posture. She bowed apologetically for being late but the alien did not say a word, instead she smiled gently and pointed for her to get in line. She stripped. It was bitterly cold, but they had been learning tummo, the ancient yoga of generating internal heat. She had seen some of the older monks dry sheets of cotton soaked in ice-cold water, one after another. She focused her breathing and began the stretches, one eye watching the alien. She was an extraordinary physical specimen. Her body was perfectly proportioned, every muscle defined without being overdeveloped. She wore her hair in a tight ponytail tied at the crown, the rest of her head shaved. She would have taken her for a boy except for the unmistakable cleft of her vulva.
The alien walked up to her and placed a hand on her inner thigh, twisting it slightly to correct the angle of her stance. “I understand Tshentso would like me to give you some personal instruction, in preparation for what awaits you?”
She gulped and blushed. She did not understand her reaction but the alien understood.
“Are you are letting your mind get distracted with erotic thoughts Choejor?” the alien teased. She stood closer and placed her hand firmly on her vulva, one finger placed between her labia threatening to penetrate, pushing her personal boundaries without apology. “Your opponent might easily exploit any distraction, any vulnerability, so you must learn control, even in the most extreme of situations. The assault might be sexual. Bring your attention back to your core, your stomach. Hold it fast, no matter what happens. You must be able to react immediately. Don’t ever imagine you will only ever face an opponent in a formal setting. You cannot allow any advantage.”
She closed her eyes and tried to ignore the sensation in her groin and to transmute it, pull it up to her stomach using a breathing technique. It seemed to work.
“Very good Choejor, did you feel the change in energetics, in your posture?”
She nodded, pleased with herself. She had felt her chest expand and lift, felt the intrusion into her most intimate area become duller, less shocking.
“Now, how would you escape this hold? Quickly now.”
Choejor clamped her legs tight and twisted down quickly, bringing one hand across to grab at Biyu’s wrist to snap it, spinning around three-sixty to follow through with a high knee kick to her side to unbalance her.
Biyu rolled effortlessly with the movement. “Very good, nice combination.”
The morning continued with a long run through the nearby forest and then a series of gruelling exercises climbing ropes, crawling across the ground, leaping over obstacles and practising vigorous fighting sequences using wooden sticks. By midmorning she was lightly bruised and sweating.
After lunch she met with Nuku, the alien with the facial tattoo. It was a completely unstructured afternoon, but one that filled her hungry mind with many challenging concepts, not least the idea that Edenoi females could hold the highest office. Nuku invited her to ask any question and she was startled by how much the alien knew. Her knowledge seemed endless. She watched in wonder as Nuku showed her images of other planetary systems and other worlds, information that would be shared with just a few.
That night she returned to share Prax’s bed. She was exhausted, her mind bursting with new ideas and images, her body with new sensations. He understood. He let her rest, gently massaging her muscles, expertly releasing all tension. She did not resist when he reached between her legs. New sensations pulsed through her body like ripples in a mountain stream, they built in intensity to become like rapids and then calmed as if she were floating in a mirror still lake.
The light of the moon woke her again. Nuku had shown her an image of the Earth rising over the horizon of the moon and said that the men who had travelled there had seen it. She felt a burning desire to see such a sight for herself. It was true; she would become a khandroma. She would leave this planet and fly amongst the stars. The age of wonders had begun.
114
Torv
The word had come through that the Pashtun raiders were on the move. She would have liked to ride the horses out to meet them, but that was a romantic notion. She was at least practical enough to understand that it would be taxing for both rider and horse. The most efficient method would be to take them completely by surprise by dropping out of the sky in the early morning, when most of them would be fast asleep. It was also the most compassionate method. If her unit moved quickly and quietly, most would die in their sleep.
The unit was naturally anxious. There had been endless discussions about what it would be like to kill. They also exhausted every philosophical and strategic option, until they had all agreed that assassination was the best way in this specific circumstance. The raids had to be stopped, cold. They could only sue for peace once they had gained the advantage. They also understood they had to be efficient and ruthless. Torv would not allow a single member of her team to come to harm. They could not allow the raiders an opportunity to fight back. As good as her team were, any fight to the death would inevitably be chaotic and desperate. Mistakes could be made and those mistakes could be fatal. It was also important that the enemy believe her fighters were supernaturally invincible.
She had talked to and fucked every member of the unit, testing for any reservations and weakness and building a tight emotional bond. Despite the anxiety and fear, she knew each member would defend the unit to the death. This was an essential psychological tool, openly admitted. Once on the ground the raiders were very real threats and each member was determined to defend their comrades, regardless of any higher strategic motive.
In the lead up to the attack they rehearsed a number of scenarios. They had been informed that the raiders would either be in tents or sleeping outside. They could not use lights and had to rely on their superior night vision. They had quickly discovered that it was the small things they had to watch out for: tent ropes, firewood, cooking utensils and random equipment lying about, all of which could trip them or make an unwelcome noise. Then there was the issue of guards and nervous horses. Torv was well aware they could overthink things. At some point they had to accept there would always be the unpredictable and it rea
lly came down to luck.
They were silent as they filed into Morrigan. They had voluntarily accepted a forty-eight hour period of abstinence to prime their system with adrenalin and cortisol, the fight or flight hormones. It only took Morrigan half an hour to fly at subsonic speed to the raider’s campsite. As she hovered high overhead, an infrared scan showed the location of humans, horses and to their disappointment, and their greatest concern, guard dogs. The scan also revealed they were in a densely wooded and protected area and there was restricted access. This made things more difficult. To deal with the dogs they sent down nano drones loaded with sedative, then they waited. After five minutes the scan showed a drop in the dogs’ temperature. They couldn’t be a hundred per cent certain but it was as good as they could hope for. After they discussed on-ground tactics Torv gave her final orders. They put on their armour and war paint and jumped, swords at the ready. Once they were on the ground anything might happen.
They landed in a circle formation and collectively held their breaths until their eyes adjusted to the dim light. Torv gave the signal and they separated into teams of two. One team went to the horses with treats, untethered them and led them away, all except for the one horse for the lone messenger (their training with horses increasing their confidence). Another team was sent to creep silently through the middle of the camp to wait at the further boundary, the rest were sent to the right and left flanks. On Torv’s signal they would methodically work their way to the centre, each assigned a number of raiders to kill. This would be accomplished by plunging their ceramic daggers through the eyes or ears and into the skull, killing them instantly and relatively bloodlessly. Torv felt sick as she felt her first thrust pierce bone. The victim shuddered with an autonomic nerve reaction and then lay still. She stared at the trickle of blood seeping out of the wound and down the cheek of a heavily bearded face. A tap on her shoulder told her to continue. The next one was no easier.
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