by K. de Long
Shit. Maybe his bait rumors had made it to her. Or maybe she’d simply guessed his possible intentions. He ached to be the source of the hurt and fear in her eyes. She looked away, but he couldn’t escape it, even seeing her in profile. Worse yet, she hadn’t missed how many of his pack cast her hostile looks. It wouldn’t escape her that they wanted to see her beaten for defying him. It would take a long time for him to reassure her she was safe, after this.
He couldn't parse what passed in the glance Eve and Tessa shared, but Tessa stayed stock-still. Eve flashed him a faint smile, urging him to get on with it. He trusted her with Tessa. But could he trust Tessa not to assume the worst?
“There is no room in this pack for traitors or rebels. There is no room for those who defy or undermine their alpha. Each of us has taken a blood oath to the Nefari and her leadership. And the price of a blood oath is that blood be spilled, should that oath be broken.”
Tessa’s lips were pressed together so tightly that their rosy flush had been overtaken by a white-rimmed pallor. He wanted to kiss her until they were plump and red from his attentions.
She’d trust him. She’d trust her alpha. She’d put her fate in his hands, and trust that he didn’t mean her hurt or harm. He’d earned her trust. She’d forgive him for scaring her—
He put the questions and worries out of his mind. He needed to think on what was to come. “Gunner, Knox, you have been the ringleaders of a grave crime. You have forsaken your pack for gossip and division. If that were the least of your sins, I’d flay the flesh off your back, but let you live.
“Nefari, these men had planned to turn on you. Tonight, they would have abandoned their posts, left us unprotected to pledge their allegiance to the Malvati. Let us show them what we think of blood traitors.”
Tessa’s eyes went wide, the fear leaving them as she realized the crowd was no longer fixated on her. Eve flashed a reassuring glance at her, its message plain: See, I told you to wait for him to finish. Already, those in the crowd were reaching for the rebels, pushing them toward the bare earth in the center of the ring of bodies. None too gently, either. Gunner landed at Liam’s feet. Knox was sent sprawling with rough blows from the hunters Liam had asked to infiltrate the crowd with batons, in case any of the betrayers had thought to fight outside the grounds.
Liam cracked his knuckles as Knox looked up, his eyes shaded with fear and loathing. The bruises had faded somewhat, but already, Liam was eager to create new ones.
At least this time, when he raised his fist, Tessa didn’t stop him. She looked on with pride in her eyes as the beating began.
Tessa watched impassively as Marrock rained blow after blow on each man who’d been thrown into the clearing with him. Despite being grossly outnumbered, not one of them managed to land a punch on him. Now that he wasn’t restraining himself sparring friends, he fought with no-holds-barred grace, filling the air with the smell of blood and the crack of shattered bones.
She didn’t know Nefari traditions well enough to know whether he’d beat the lot of them to death, or simply stop once the majority of them were crippled or unconscious. And she couldn’t care. If others thought of deflecting, these people’s fates would give them pause. Even a dozen warriors was an advantage that neither her pack nor Marrock’s should stomach. It could be enough to enable Elias to mount more frequent raiding parties or traps. Whatever bloodshed Marrock demanded was necessary.
She cheered with the crowd as the man she’d once thought was kind fell into the dirt, one of his kneecaps shattered by Marrock’s foot. She couldn’t quite see him as a rebel, but she didn’t doubt Marrock’s conviction that he was one. And it made her put her talk with him in a new light. If he was, even then, planning on working against Marrock, perhaps there’d been more to Marrock’s outburst than simply fury at another man’s disrespect.
All of those Mara had introduced her to were apparently troublemakers, and that made her doubt the woman. If Marrock had any evidence against her, she had no doubt Mara would be fighting for her life with the rest of them. But perhaps that simply meant Mara had learned to be underhanded.
She was on to Mara. When Marrock was done, Tessa would apologize. She’d promise to heed his warning about the woman. There was nothing the woman could do to tear the Nefari apart anymore. Tessa wouldn’t be her pawn.
It was time to make a choice, and she chose to trust Marrock. He’d done far more to merit it than she’d deserved. If she’d ever had a doubt about his worth as a leader, it was dispelled as she watched him dispense his brand of justice: brutal, memorable, and unwavering.
Tessa swallowed. Here was ultimate proof that her dad was wrong. That Marrock was just as determined to stop Elias as Alder was. She might not know the full story or all the particulars, but she wasn’t sure she needed to. There was no way that Marrock would give up a dozen strong hunters simply to lure the Kumori into a trap.
Marrock stomped a man’s skull with a sickening crack. Her wolf growled in approval, and something in its sick glee made her second-guess herself. What if she was mistaking her liking of him as a person for approval? She’d seen him do questionable things, things that she doubted even Alder in his prime would have done.
Perhaps it was simply a difference in leadership styles, or perhaps Marrock was hiding something in his past that got at the root of their current struggles. She’d taken poorly to his manhandling and controlling nature, even when he first confronted Knox over her. What if that management style, that had clearly dispossessed some of his own lesser alphas, had led to the difficulties with the Malvati? He’d had patience with her, out of respect for the trauma of their forced mating, but if he wasn’t doing that with his own, were they wrong to dislike his rule?
She sighed. She’d have to put her ear to the ground, see what the rest of the Nefari really thought about Elias…and Marrock, too. It was sheer self-interest. After all, if Marrock was deposed as alpha, what would be left for her? Returning to her family in shame, with a stain on her record for ostensibly failing to protect his back? Remaining here as a relic, a diplomatic dead-weight?
She liked Marrock, but she’d been wrong about Mara…what if she was wrong about him, too?
Chapter 21
Liam was hardly human. It was close enough to the full moon that his wolf was being far more outspoken than he was accustomed to. In the carnage he’d left behind were the wrecks of his enemies’ plans. After this smackdown, it would be quite some time before anyone got the nerve to talk treason again. And that was good, but it still brought up all of the lingering resentment at having to do it.
Twelve hunters. Enough to substantially impact the roster, impact his pack’s ability to forage and feed themselves. If he knew for sure it was for a good reason, that would be one thing. But the fact was, none of this would have come to a head if Tessa had simply heeded his warning about Mara in the first place. She’d played right into Mara’s plans, and his people had been the ones to suffer for it.
The rage fueled him as he peeled his shirt off. According to his pack’s traditions, he took a knife from Quentin to etch his victories into his skin. Once he’d rubbed some poultice into them, they’d heal quickly, leaving only a scar that could be tattooed over as a testament to his prowess—but this time, a reminder he didn’t want, and one that he feared he might resent Tessa for.
The act of letting his own blood flow served as a signal to the pack that the conflict was over, that his enemies had paid for their sins with blood, and that he’d suffered to unify his pack, as was appropriate for his status. For the act of shedding a packmember’s blood was not to be done lightly, or without consequence, even when it was the right course of action.
Eve and Quentin thumped Tessa’s shoulder and backed away as he turned toward her. Tessa led him away from the clearing as those on duty to dispose of the bodies set to work. The crowd had cleared away, fearing they’d be recruited…or next. But he had no doubt that there’d be a dozen tiny gatherings all over the encampment a
s people reviewed their loyalty to him and looked to see if they needed to clean up their acts to prevent this public end from being theirs.
The morning’s triumph was gone. It was impossible to think of something so selfish as Tessa’s naked body when he was covered in his people’s blood, which wouldn’t have been spilled, had she not lost her temper and undermined him in the first place.
He’d done his best to put it in the past, done his best to be understanding. But his wolf had had enough of that. The smell of his enemies’ blood had only whetted the beast’s appetite. The little bit of submission she’d given him simply wasn’t enough to right her wrongs.
And she didn’t fucking know it. She looked at him with those beautiful emerald eyes glinting with admiration and bloodlust, not realizing that it was her fault. She might be closer to him, but she was still one of his enemies. Just like the brother he’d lost.
“That was—”
He cut her off. “Don’t talk to me.”
“Jeez. Touchy. Fine.” Hurt flitted across her face, but she shoved it back. He had no doubt she was planning some other way to act out next, thinking it justified because he’d snapped at her. He severely hoped she’d think the better of it.
They walked in silence. Finally, he could bear it no more. She had to know why he was furious. “You should have been punished, too, you know.”
Her shoulders straightened, and her breath hitched. Finally, a reaction from the ice queen. “Excuse me?”
“Because of your fucking tantrum, that lot had an outlet for their discontent. They’d still be grumbling among themselves if your tantrum hadn’t convinced the pack that I’d become too lenient.”
Her eyes narrowed. She wanted to argue. And maybe she was right. They’d hashed out that particular fight over and over again, and blaming her one more time wouldn’t do any good.
But his blood was up, his wolf all but pushing through his skin despite the lack of absinthe to facilitate its emergence. “Because you acted out, I’ve lost nearly a dozen solid hunters. Because you lost your temper, some in my pack may go hungry.”
“So put me on the rosters,” she said. “I’ll earn my keep, and you’ve already seen that I have ways of finding more useful harvests than your hunters, alone.”
Her response surprised him. She wasn’t being defensive or passing the blame. But it wasn’t enough.
“Like I can send my mate out, alone, into the woods, after she’s so publicly shown her disdain for me.”
She picked up her pace to leave him a few steps behind; he stared at her hair swinging down by her round ass. A round ass that was probably still sore from his spankings. “And we’ve already cleared up the shit that went into that. You just want to punish someone, and you’re mad that your supposed hunters went down like pussycats.”
He liked the show of defiance…just not now. She could at least pretend to have an apology or some remorse. Logically, the defectors would have tried it at some point, for some other reason. But that couldn’t dispel his anger at her for her involvement in it happening now, for this reason.
He seized her arm, and she wrenched it away. He was stripping away all of the goodwill he’d earned the previous night, but he couldn’t make himself care. He’d known some of those men from his training days. He’d grown up with them, hunted with them. And she’d forced him to choose her over them, with no recognition of how it hurt to discipline his friends, his family, like that.
He opened his mouth to tell her, only to see the corner of hers rippling. Her wolf was attempting to push through, and he’d hit enough of a nerve that it was actually succeeding, from pure desperation. She was shifting, only without the absinthe that could help her control it and control the beast within. If she attacked someone, pack justice demanded her blood. There was simply no room for a shifter who harmed a packmate in a moment of anger. Anger was no excuse—the transformation might be a mistake, but she’d still be held accountable for any violence she wreaked while her wolf was calling the shots.
If she transformed, this close to the encampment, she might attack someone. And it would be his fault. He’d be forced to put her down and reap the harms when Alder and Alora found out about their only child’s death.
His heart ached, and he jerked her into his arms. The woman was still inside there. He just needed to hold tight to her until she overwhelmed the wolf.
His wolf wanted him to kiss her, or spank her again, or simply turn her loose and watch her wreak havoc. But any of that would simply be wood on the fire he’d just finished putting out. No. He’d lost his temper, and the best thing to do now was simply to wait.
His body ached. The cuts stung as she struggled and knocked into them. But they were in this together.
Tessa clawed at his arms, drawing more blood than the men he’d just killed had managed to. But he refused to defend himself, refused to release the monster wearing her body. That way led to madness.
His wolf ached to join her, to roam the woods freely and slaughter any who approached him. It was too close to the full moon for him to have fought as he had. It had been urgent, and right, but there were consequences. If she evaded him, or if he allowed her to lure his wolf out, it could spell the end of her future with his pack, as well as his own leadership.
The world was going to hell. His pack members were forgetting their allegiance, and his mate wanted to tear his throat out. He wanted blood and death to repay it in full.
Tessa’s shifts subsided, her bones returning to their normal shape and alignment. He kissed her forehead, and held her close.
“You’re an asshole,” she mumbled into his chest.
His own wolf agreed. But his wolf liked being that asshole.
She pushed him away and walked toward home as fast as her legs would take her.
He breathed through his nose, willing his wolf back. She’d want an apology later, or something, but after a night of bloodshed, it just wasn’t in his nature to play docile.
Despite the little bottle of poultice in his cabinet, Liam let his wounds remain unbandaged, with just a little bit of alcohol pressed into them to keep out infection. The pain kept him grounded, kept him remembering the stakes of all of this. They were much too big for him to risk losing his temper again.
Tessa kept giving him little looks out of the corner of her eye—she was aware he had abstained from the treatment that would close his wounds up within a day, but she was still too mad at him to ask why.
The pack had quieted down, their sense of order restored. Oh, Mara was pissed, but she didn’t dare voice her anger so soon after her cousin’s execution. He suspected she was behind some of the nastier rumors circulating in its wake, that he had chosen Tessa over his own, executing her collaborators but sparing her. Someone was trying to convince his pack that Tessa was a spy. Few were inclined to believe it, but he had no doubt that if Tessa heard the rumors, they’d sting.
He wanted to take care of her, despite their bestial selves warring. Despite all of the complications she threw into his life. Things hadn’t been the same since that first night he woke up with her in his arms. It hadn’t happened since. He could only blame himself, and the all but incoherent rage that had drawn his wolf out after the incident on the dueling grounds.
She was mostly unharmed, with only minor bruises and scrapes on her body. But it hurt him to see them. He didn’t want to think of any mark on her body that he hadn’t put there in a consensual fit of lust. The marks his teeth had left on her shoulder shouldn’t be alongside the scratches and bruises of her transformation, where alien-shaped bones had tried to poke through her smooth skin.
Even though things were quiet, he couldn’t shake the sense that something bad was about to happen. He hadn’t heard news of Elias’s movements in long enough to put him on edge, and the discontent among the Nefari and with Tessa just cemented it. There was entirely too much at stake.
He shivered. One way or another, things were changing. He just hoped that he’d survive the
transition.
Chapter 22
It wasn’t Tessa’s place to ask why the angry marks on Marrock’s stomach remained raw and angry long after the poultice should have spurred them to heal. That her own bruised body had long-since ceased to ache just made her even more suspicious. She suspected he was lacing her food with some of the herbs, for his own purposes. Maybe it was an apology, or maybe it was possessive. But it would have made their resumed silence so much more unbearable if her body had creaked and throbbed from the results of her unexpected half-transformation.
He just…he’d gotten to her. She’d thought they were past the roughness of their initial conflicts. But he’d rubbed her nose in it. Made it clear that she’d already proved to him that she could never be the woman he wanted, and expected her to be. With that kind of lack of faith, with the idea that no matter what she did she’d never be anything but that ill-tempered, angry thorn in his side, what incentive was there for her to do better?
They brought out the worst in each other, that much was clear. There might be chemistry and some unseen force pulling them into each other’s arms, but what good was it when their fights could override their better natures and turn their inner beasts loose on each other and on the pack?
Maybe it was better for them to be apart. Maybe he was corrupting her, or she him. He’d asked her why she hadn’t run, and she’d given him the best answer she could. But what if it was the wrong one? What if it was better for her to accept the shame, return to her pack, and let both of their packs be healthier for their separation?
Or worse yet, what if he’d asked because he hoped she would? What if that one perfect night had been a fluke? What if he already had some other woman waiting in the wings to comfort him when she spurned him? It wasn’t like she knew where he went all day. It wasn’t like she had a role in his work. Maybe he mentioned it as a dare because he wanted her gone?