Loving Eliza

by Ruth Ann Nordin

  He softly kissed her before he stood up and retrieved his hat from the table.

  “I can’t wait to see the picture when it’s ready. Can you?”

  He shrugged.

  She sighed. “I guess pictures are a female thing. Alright. I’m finally ready and we’re not running behind. I did good today.”

  Smiling, he followed her out of the house. On the way to town, she spent the time discussing how they might stand or sit for the picture. She always liked pictures. It was a picture that allowed her a tangible connection to her son, and now a picture would be the thing to tell the world that she and John did live in this place. She had a hard time sitting still. For once, the trip to town seemed to take much too long. He seemed amused by her eagerness, but she didn’t pay his teasing glances any mind. The fact remained that this was a perfect day. The day was cool enough to enjoy it, and the sun shone brightly. Yes. It was perfect.

  When John parked the wagon on the edge of town, she didn’t have the patience to wait for him to help her down. By the time he reached her side, she was already on the ground. She adjusted her dress and took his elbow. “Maybe we should see what Addy and Frank are up to before we leave. What do you think?”

  He nodded.

  It wasn’t hard to find where the photographer was. In front of the general store was a line of people waiting for their pictures to be taken, and the photographer was busy setting up his equipment. Eliza and John took their spot in line.

  “It looks like the whole town came out for this,” she told John. “Well, at least mostly everyone.”

  She didn’t see Harriet Lube anywhere, and that was a relief. She figured she’d have to run into the grouchy woman at some point but was more than happy to delay that event. However, she did see Troy there. He sat across the street talking to two men. He glanced their way and she quickly looked away. She hadn’t spoken to him since the night of Charity’s dinner. In church, she and John sat on the other side of the room, and Troy had left them alone. Still, she couldn’t shrug off her unease whenever she did see him. She felt that she should apologize for leaving him as abruptly as she had but didn’t know how. It was much too awkward.

  “Good morning, John. Good morning, Eliza,” a woman called out.

  They turned and saw Alan Gray and Bethany Grooms behind them.

  Eliza blinked in surprise. “Why, Alan, you’re out in public.”

  He chuckled. “I’ve been known to get out once in awhile. I don’t hide in my room all the time.”

  “Oh I know, but you did keep to yourself a lot.”

  “That’s before he met me,” Bethany said.

  “Actually, I should thank you for introducing us,” Alan added. “We’ve decided to marry come spring.”

  “No kidding?” Eliza asked.

  “We would marry today but don’t want to rush it,” Bethany stated.

  “Well, that’s great,” Eliza said. “Isn’t that great, John?”

  He nodded.

  Eliza grinned. “I’m happy for you both. Now Alan can start living life instead of reading about it.”

  Alan laughed. “I do still read.”

  “Just not as often,” Bethany added.

  Marshal Custer ran over to them, interrupting their conversation. “Oh good. I’m glad you’re in town,” he told John. “I need you to fix a broken step in my house. I was going to go out and get you, but since you’re here, would you mind doing it now?”

  John glanced at the photographer and then at Eliza.

  “I’ll talk to the photographer so he’ll take your picture first,” the marshal said.

  John nodded and they followed Ralph over to the photographer who held a dry plate in his hand.

  “Corbin,” Ralph called out, getting the photographer’s attention. “I’m the marshal here in town, and I have something that needs fixing in my house. Now, this man John here is the only one qualified to fix it. I was wondering if I could move him and Eliza to the front of the line so that he can tend to my home.”

  Corbin gave her a good look. “Eliza? That’s your name?”

  She shifted from one foot to the other, unsure of why the question unsettled her. “Yes.”

  He smiled. “I thought you looked familiar.”

  Her eyes grew wide. No. It couldn’t be. No this far out west...in this small town.

  “I’ll be happy to take your picture. I’m just about ready. Why don’t you two go on over there. John, you sit in that chair and Eliza, you stand beside him and put your hand on his shoulder.”

  She numbly followed John to the platform with the light green curtain behind it. She took a deep breath to settle the panic rising in her chest. He wouldn’t come out and tell anyone how he knew her, would he? Despite her slight trembling, she managed to stand beside John and set a hand on his shoulder.

  John glanced at her, obviously sensing something wasn’t right.

  She forced a smile. “I’ve never had a picture taken before.” Her voice shook. She hadn’t meant for it to, but it really couldn’t be helped. A part of her past was behind that camera and could easily announce what she used to be to the entire town. “Let’s just go home as soon as you’re done with that step. We can come back another day to see Addy.”

  His gaze shifted from her to the photographer and then back to her.

  She knew the question in his eyes. Had Corbin been one of her customers? She hated answering it but knew she had to. “Yes. He’s from Omaha.”

  “I need you two to look at the camera,” Corbin shouted out.

  She forced her eyes on the camera. All she could do was act as if nothing was wrong. Maybe everything would be fine. There was no reason to panic. She focused on her breathing and counted silently. Her hands steadied and she was able to give a slight smile when Corbin counted backwards from three to one.

  After he took the picture, he called out, “I’ll have it ready by tomorrow morning.”

  She breathed a sigh of relief as the next couple with two children were ushered forward. She gladly stepped down from the platform. One look over her shoulder told her that Corbin had turned his attention to the next people in line. Maybe that was it. Maybe there was nothing to worry about after all.

  The marshal walked over to them. “Will you come over and fix that step now?” he asked John.

  She was aware that John glanced in her direction but she couldn’t make eye contact with him. Even if he knew what she’d been and what she’d done, she just couldn’t look at him at that moment. For him to see one of the men she’d been intimate with wasn’t something she relished. She’d hoped that she’d never see any of those men again.

  She didn’t know what else to do except sit in one of the few vacant chairs in front of the general store. She didn’t feel like seeing Addy or talking to anyone. She just wanted to wait for John and then go home. After John left with Ralph, she settled into the chair and put her face in her hands. She couldn’t come back out here tomorrow and face Corbin again. She just couldn’t. All she wanted was for the past to stay buried in the past. Why did he have to come to town and stir up old memories? Why couldn’t the past just stay there? Maybe she could have Frank or Addy pick up the picture tomorrow. Then she could avoid coming back while Corbin was still in town.

  She wrapped her arms around herself, suddenly feeling vulnerable. She wished she had brought the picture of her son but she hadn’t. Glancing up at the crowd, she watched Corbin as he took another picture, acting as if nothing was wrong. Well, maybe for him, nothing was wrong. He, after all, had only seen her as a prostitute, and who knew how many of those he’d visited in his time? Maybe it made no difference that she was there. All he said was hi. He hadn’t been rude. If he’d wanted to come out and tell everyone what she’d been, he would have already done it, wouldn’t he?

  Another family moved to the platform and assembled to get their picture taken. Corbin told them how to stand. She watched the process for awhile. The line moved slowly. Not once did Corbin look in her
direction. That was a good sign, wasn’t it? Maybe he would leave her alone. Maybe she worried over nothing. She stood for a moment and peered into the general store to check the clock. She’d been there for a full fifteen minutes. Sitting back down, she slowly exhaled. John had to fix one step. Once he was done, he’d be back and they could go home. Surely, he was almost done by now.

  “I never did congratulate you,” a familiar voice said.

  Jerking, she turned to Troy who was now sitting next to her. She placed her hand over her heart. “I didn’t see you come over here.”

  “Apparently not.”

  Great. It wasn’t bad enough that Corbin was within viewing range, but she had to contend with Troy as well. Shifting in the chair, she cleared her throat and said, “I never did apologize for leaving the way I did. When I was heading out of the house, I ran into John, and...” She hesitated, knowing that whatever she said, it wouldn’t come out right. Men never handled rejection well. At least, not in her experience. “I mean, it was just a dinner we were going to. We weren’t courting or anything.” And even if they were, she had every right to marry John anyway. She’d been under no obligation to marry Troy. Ever.

  Troy leaned back in his chair. “You don’t have to explain anything to me. You loved him all along. You should be with him.”

  Right. She didn’t believe him. The nagging feeling that there was something bad about him was screaming at her. “Thank you,” she finally said, deciding it was best to act as if he meant it.

  “I see you two got your picture taken.”

  “Yes.” Now she had to look for an excuse to get out of there. She scanned the crowd of people who mingled around the business district. There really wasn’t anyone she felt comfortable going up to and starting a conversation with. She glanced through the doorway and saw that Frank was helping a customer. When would John get back?

  “I figured that you two got one of those silver frames,” Troy continued. “Our mother gave Aaron one for each of her sons, even John. None of us thought he’d ever get married at the time, but he sure showed us.”

  She frowned, not particularly caring for the way he laughed. “He almost married Daphne.”

  “I know. Everyone knows. If Daphne had showed up first, then John would’ve married her when you came into town.”

  She blinked at the bitter edge in his words.

  “But things work out for the best,” he continued, his eyes sharp even as he smiled. “Good Old Willy has a reason to smile again. Those two are going to do well together.”

  That was it. Eliza didn’t care if Frank was with a customer or not. She had to get away from Troy. She quickly got to her feet. “I just remember something I have to get from the store. It was real nice seeing you again, Troy.”

  She didn’t wait for him to respond. As soon as she was in the store, she wiped her hands on her dress, hoping to dry them. She shouldn’t break out into a sweat just because she talked to someone. What was it about Troy that bothered her? Was it always going to be like this? She hated it. Hated having Corbin out there, taking pictures, and knowing exactly what she used to be. Hated having Troy lingering around, thinking that she’d duped him. She never should have agreed to go to that stupid party with him. If she hadn’t been so hungry, she wouldn’t have. It was better than sleeping with Alan so he’d give her money for the restaurant. Wasn’t it?

  She squeezed her eyes shut tight, willing the tears away. This was supposed to be a good day. She and John were getting their picture taken. It was supposed to be perfect. So why was it quickly turning sour? And how could she get things back to how they should be?

  “Eliza, are you alright?”

  She opened her eyes and looked at Frank’s concerned expression. “Oh. Hello, Frank. I...Uh...” She glanced around the store. What could she use back home?

  Corbin entered the store. “Oh good. Do you have a screwdriver?” he asked Frank. “I got a loose screw out there.”

  She took a step back, wishing she could fade into the background or slip out. She glanced out the window and noticed that Troy was still sitting by the door. Gritting her teeth, she wondered if there was a door in the hallway behind the counter that would lead outside. Was there an alley behind the store?

  Frank turned to his counter and pulled out a drawer beneath his cash register. “I have one in here somewhere.”

  Corbin smiled at her. “It sure is nice to see a familiar face. I do a lot of traveling, so I rarely get a chance to meet up with someone twice.”

  “You know Eliza?” Frank asked.

  “We had some business a couple of times.”

  Eliza was going to throw up. She just knew he was going to tell Frank what kind of business they had. Another glance out the window showed her that Troy hadn’t budged from his spot. She couldn’t decide who was worse. Both Troy and Corbin were dangerous, just for different reasons.

  “Found it,” Frank called out.

  “Thank you.” Corbin took the screwdriver and left.

  She breathed a sigh of relief. He hadn’t told Frank! She didn’t know why, but he was being quiet about the whole thing. Maybe he understood that she wanted out of that business and needed a second chance to do it. Whatever the reason, she wasn’t going to let the opportunity slip by.

  “I better find John. We should head back home,” she told Frank. “Will you tell Addy hi and that I’ll see her next time I come into town?”

  “Are you sure that’s all you want? I do have lots of goodies on the shelves,” he hinted with a wide grin.

  “You’re always the salesman, Frank. We’ll spend our money here next time we’re in town. I promise.”

  “I’ll hold you to that.”

  She couldn’t help but smile.

  “Frank, can you come out here? We need help with the platform!”

  One look out the door notified her that it had fallen over.

  “I better assist.”

  “Frank, do you have a door that leads to the alley?” she quietly asked.

  He stepped closer to her and whispered, “Trying to avoid Troy?”

  “How did you know?”

  “Addy.”

  “Yes. As a matter of fact, I am trying to avoid him.”

  He nodded. “Back down that small hallway is the backroom. The door is there.”

  “Thank you, Frank.”

  “Anytime.”

  She slipped out the door he mentioned and breathed in the fresh air. She was alone in the alley, and she never felt so good to get away from people in her entire life. She turned in the direction that would lead to Charity’s house and made her way down the dirty alley, careful to lift the hem of her dress.

  She reached the end of the row of businesses and stepped onto the dusty road, squinting in the sunlight. John would be three blocks away. She strolled along, thinking of how odd it was that things were so quiet in this section of town but she figured all the activity was in the center part of it. When she approached Harriet Lube’s house, her stomach tensed and she paused. Did she dare even walk in front of the woman’s residence? Harriet rarely looked out her windows. Maybe she could quickly pass by unnoticed. That was the curse of living in a small town. Everyone knew everyone else, and when something bad happened, it made future dealings a very unpleasant experience.

  “I thought you might be down this way.”

  She gasped and whirled around.

  Corbin sauntered up to her, looking as if he didn’t have a care in the world. “It sure is good to see you again, honey.”

  “I’m not your honey.”

  “Not all the time. Just when I pay you to be.”

  She took a deep breath to settle her nerves. “Please Mister...” She suddenly realized she didn’t even know his last name. But what did that matter? “I don’t want any trouble.”

  “I don’t want any trouble either. Why do you think I kept my mouth shut back there? However, I have been looking for a moment to speak to you...alone.”

  “I’m marri
ed. I don’t do that anymore.”

  He chuckled. “Married? You? A prostitute?”

  “I’m not one anymore. I came here to leave that life behind.”

  He stopped laughing and sighed. “That’s a shame. I saw you and hoped that we could...” He shrugged. “Well, you know. In a town this size, it’s not likely there’s a brothel either.”

  “No, there’s not.”

  “Very well. I’ll just have to wait until I get to a town that does. Sorry to disturb you, Eliza.”

  Was that really it? Was he going to leave it at that? She tried to think back to what she’d learned about Corbin, but there had been so many men who’d come her way, it was hard to remember who was who. All she could remember was his face. She sighed. She hoped he was one of the nicer ones.

  She turned around and nearly ran into Harriet who had a satisfied smirk on her face. “Interesting,” Harriet said as she scanned her from head to toe. “A prostitute, hmm?”

  “Mrs. Lube, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t say anything.”

  “I bet.”

  Eliza struggled on how to handle the woman. In her time of working for her, Mrs. Lube hadn’t proven to be a rational woman. “I worked hard to get out of that life.”

  “You certainly did. You took your feminine wiles and married that poor retard who didn’t know any better.”

  Something in Eliza snapped. “Now you listen here, you tired out old hag. It’s one thing for you to point the finger at what I used to do, but when you talk about my husband that way, it’s the final straw. I have put up with you long enough. You promised me money for my work, and yet you’ve cheated me out of a good $4.”

  “Because you didn’t earn it.”

  “I did so earn it! I went without food and you sat there and ate right in front of me, knowing how hungry I was and refusing to have enough compassion to let me even have a scrap of food from your table. You even fed the stray dog that makes his rounds to your place once a day, but you couldn’t spare anything for me.”

  “And it looks to me like someone who’d give her body in order to make a living is beneath a dog. The only man who’d have you is one who can’t tell the difference.”