by Roth, T. A.
He's a good guy, and maybe if I hadn't found the person who owns my heart, I'd give us another chance.
"So am I. Thanks again." I give his cheek a quick kiss and slide into the driver's seat.
"Stay safe." I nod and he waits until the gate pulls up to go back inside.
Letty is sitting on the couch when I get to the apartment.
"Okay, spill it. What the hell happened last night?"
"He's dating Natalie." She gives me a confused look, and it takes her a minute to work it out.
"Wait. What? Psycho stalker is dating your co-worker?" I nod and sag into the couch burying my face into a pillow.
"He cornered me at the bar, Letty. Said he was taking care of her like he took care of me. He was here the other night."
"When?"
"The weekend I was at my parents’. When my sisters got here banging on the door, I woke up in my bed and the house was cleaned up. I don't remember doing any of that. I was drunk off my ass, but you'd think I'd remember if I walked outside to throw out the trash." She shakes her head and grabs her cell phone.
"I'm calling the cops."
"And telling them what? I have no proof. He's set it up perfectly. Ben asked him to check on me. It's not illegal to send someone flowers. I can't prove that he broke in. It'll look like I'm the crazy one. I was there last night, and he was working. He could turn it around on me. "
"What about what he did at the bar?" she says frustrated.
"Besides leaving me a shaken mess? There are no marks, and I have no witnesses. I froze up like an idiot so, as far as anyone is concerned, it probably looked like a guy rubbing up on his girlfriend."
She paces the living room. "How are you not more pissed off?"
"I am. I hate having to look over my damn shoulder all the time," I say frustrated.
"You need to tell Ben. You need to call him and tell him to get his ass home. If you don't, I will. You can't let that psycho get away with this. He's fucking crazy, Ari. I don't think he’s just going to go away."
"I know."
"Where did you stay last night?" I don't want to get into this right now. There's too much to think about, and I need to call Ben before he loses his shit on me too.
"Rudy's," I say getting off the couch to go to my room.
"Rudy who?” she says probably running through everyone she knows. “Wait . . . high school boyfriend Rudy?"
"It’s a long story. I need to call Ben. I'll tell you later."
"I swear I could write a damn Lifetime movie with all the shit going on around here."
"Tell me about it," I mutter.
The look in her eyes was my undoing. It was a mixture of shock and maybe jealousy and I thrived on it. The hope beats deep in my chest. Being that close to her at the bar put her perfectly round ass snugly against the hard ridge of my cock. Maintaining control is becoming impossible.
Natalie is oblivious. She's curved over the edge of her couch as I take her from behind. Her long black hair is fisted in my hand. If I don't see her face, I can imagine it's my sweet girl. I thrust into her, the smell of Ari's sweetness still fresh on my clothes. She whimpers, and I thrust harder wishing it was Ari's cries. My eyes are closed as I shut out the world and imagine my sweet girl. How she would take me and how I would bring her so much pleasure she wouldn't be able to deny me.
"I'm close,” she whispers.
I pick up my pace, the image of those red lips making me lose my resolve. She whimpers my name, and I follow close behind with only one person on my mind.
Ari.
MY DECISION WAS MADE THE minute I hung up the phone last night. There is no way I could last another six weeks without my girl. I wanted to climb through the damn screen and claim my woman. She looked unbelievable, and the thought of any other motherfucker even looking at her had me seeing red. I couldn't get back to sleep after that call if you paid me, so I've tried to keep myself busy ever since. My muscles are aching from my latest attempt; I took what feels like a ten-mile run around the city. She might still be sleeping, but I'm done waiting. I dial her number and wait for her beautiful face to appear on the screen.
"Hey," she answers with a smile.
Her bare shoulders come into view, her hair is piled high and last night’s makeup is smudged around her eyes.
"Did I wake you?"
"No, I was just getting ready to take a shower."
"Can I watch?" She gives me a shaky smile and looks away from the screen.
"What's the matter, baby?" She looks into the camera and gives me a shrug. Her eyes are glossy, and I know she's holding back tears.
"You can tell me anything, Ari. Talk to me please."
"I need you," she whispers.
I furrow my brows. "You have me."
"Here. With me. I need you." A tear runs down her cheek and she's quick to wipe it away. "I'm sorry if that makes me a selfish bitch, but-"
"I'll work on it. Okay? I'll call Larry and I'll figure it out."
She nods. "I'm just going to take a quick shower. Do you mind if I call you back?"
She looks defeated, and I wish I were there to take that look off her face. We disconnect, and if I hadn't already made the decision, this conversation sealed it.
The rest of our conversations over the weekend seem to go the same way. She's distant and preoccupied. We haven't FaceTimed since Saturday before her shower; she made up some bullshit story about the camera on her phone not working.
It's Monday and I've overslept. My racing thoughts have been making it hard to get to sleep and exhaustion has finally set in. I slept through the alarm, and there's a missed call from Ari. My phone rings as I run around the apartment like a chicken with my head cut off.
"Hey, kid."
"Hey, Larry. Thanks for calling me back."
I left a message for him to give me a call. My hope is that he'll let me come back to the L.A. office without giving me a hard time.
"No problem, what's up? Taylor tells me you're doing a great job, and he's looking forward to having you for the rest of the summer." I put him on speaker so I can finish getting dressed.
"Yeah. That's what I was calling about." I take a deep breath before continuing. "I don't want to stay. I'm thankful for the opportunity. You and Taylor have been very generous with your time and I've learned a lot. It's just, personally, I'm going through some stuff, and I think being home is better for me right now. If possible, I'd like to come back to the L.A. office."
I probably sound like the biggest pussy, but it's the truth without telling him the whole truth. He's quiet for what seems like years.
"I understand, kid. I didn't really give you much of a choice. Thought getting out of here for a while would be good for you. Don't worry, I'll give Taylor a call and we’ll work it out. He's going to want you to at least finish out the week. You okay with that?"
I feel like a hundred-pound weight has lifted off my shoulders.
"Yeah, that's fine. Thanks again, Larry, I appreciate it. I'll talk to you soon. I'm running late, and I don't want to give him an extra reason to be pissed off today."
He laughs. "Yeah, I'm not sure he's going to take it well, but he'll get over it."
"Thanks."
Four days and she'll be back in my arms. The thought puts a smile on my face, and I'm out the door. I send Ari a quick text explaining what happened and promise to call her in the afternoon.
I don't want to look at Ben. It's not his fault I'm mad at the world, so I told him I dropped my phone and the camera stopped working. He knows it's bullshit; the cover he bought me could probably stop a bullet, but he hasn't argued. Which, in turn, has only pissed me off more. He's so damn agreeable lately when all I want is someone to fight with. My heart is racing out of my chest as I run out my aggression on the treadmill. Letty is on the elliptical next to me, and I can see her worried glances in my peripheral. We missed our nightly call—he texted that he overslept—and I feel evil for being relieved. It's exhausting to pretend everything is o
kay.
Letty and I spent the weekend in my apartment. The enormity of the situation has set in, and she's right, this isn't close to being over. Amos said it himself that he won't leave me alone until I'm his, which is never happening. So now what?
"I'm going to go get ready," I say punching stop on the treadmill. It's Monday, and as much as I want to hide under my covers, I have bills to pay.
"Okay. I'll head back with you."
I'm in the elevator on the way up to my office just a couple of hours later. I have nervous butterflies in my stomach at the thought of facing Natalie. In dealing with all of my drama, I've completely forgotten she's now involved. How do you tell someone the guy they're head over heels for is a fucking psycho?
I only see it going two ways; she'll either believe me and be thankful or call me a liar and hate me for ruining her relationship.
Jeremy is taking a call at the reception desk when I walk in. He hangs up as I approach.
"Good morning. Did they demote you to receptionist?" I ask playfully. He's been a nice addition to the office; I also think he has feelings for Natalie. He's been grouchy with her since she got the flowers.
"Funny. That was Natalie, and she sounds horrible. She's not coming in today."
"Okay. I'll cover the phones. Just let me know if you need anything."
Natalie has more experience, so she helps him with some of the paralegal type stuff.
"Will do."
The day went by without any major hiccups. Ben sounded a lot happier than usual on our afternoon call. His four weeks is up on Friday. He hasn't told me if he's coming home or staying in London, and I'm too afraid of his answer to ask. My stomach flutters with nervous energy as I drive to Dr. Stone's office. I used the number she gave me for emergencies after talking to Ben on Saturday. She wanted to see me in her office as soon as possible.
Crazy cat lady greets me as I walk in.
"She'll be with you in a few minutes," she says looking at the door then back at me.
"No boyfriend this time?" I haven't seen her since my first appointment, and the thought of Ben's face, when she hit on him, makes me smile.
"Nope, just me." Her shoulders sag in disappointment. Sorry, honey, I feel the same way.
The door opens a few minutes later, and Dr. Stone waves me in. I make myself comfortable on the fluffy couch and get ready for the inquisition. I go over every detail of what happened at the bar and her wrist must be sore from all of the notes she seems to be taking.
"So tell me more about Rudy."
"There's not much to tell. We dated in high school and ran into each other a few months ago when I was out with Ben. I met him for lunch, he confessed that he still had feelings for me, and I hadn't seen him since."
"Does Ben know that he still harbors feelings for you?"
"Yes, and naturally, he's not happy about it."
"Does he know that you spent the night with him?"
My shoulders stiffen. "I didn't spend the night with him. I was in a messed-up situation, and he offered me his spare bedroom. It wasn't like that," I snap.
"Do you think Ben will see it that way?" No, I think he'll lose his damn mind as I would if the situation were reversed.
"No, but maybe when I explain the alternative . . . Going back to an empty apartment would have been stupid and unsafe. I'm hoping he'll see reason."
"So you're planning to tell him?"
I let out an exasperated sigh. "Yes, okay. You and Letty are right. I should have been forthcoming from the beginning. In sparing his feelings, I've put myself in harm’s way."
"Exactly. You're finally listening," she says giving me a smug smile.
"I think he's the only one who can stop this. Amos seems like a very determined man."
"I think he's proved that in his actions, don't you?" I nod, and just like that, the timer dings and our time is up.
"I'd like to keep your appointment on Thursday if you don't mind."
Not at all. I need all the therapy I can get my hands on right now. Especially, since I plan to tell Ben.
"I don't mind at all. I'll see you Thursday."
It’s Friday, and I'm surprising Ari today. After a long conversation with Mr. Rummel, Larry was able to convince him that he needed me back in L.A. I'm thankful he left out my personal reasons. Taylor wasn't happy about it, but he reluctantly agreed. I've been able to work out my flight plan so I'll be back in L.A. by the time Ari gets home from work tonight.
I've just landed in New York; I have at least another hour before our afternoon call. I've worked really hard this week not to tip her off. Not that it’s been difficult. She seemed distracted and short every time we talked. Something I plan on remedying tonight. We need to have a long talk, and I plan to get some answers, even if I have to shake them out of her.
Grabbing my carry-on from the overhead bin, I head out in search of coffee. I've been too excited to sleep, and it's starting to catch up with me. There's a Starbucks near my connecting flight, and I make sure to order an extra shot of espresso.
It's dinnertime, and I laugh at Ari's Back to the Future reference. If everything goes as planned, I'll be doing dinner all over again in a few hours. The barista hands me my coffee, and I make myself comfortable in an empty armchair. I bring up Facebook on my cell and scroll through to waste time before our call. The TV is set to an entertainment news show and the host is carrying on about the latest Kardashian drama. I can't help but roll my eyes. Right before going to commercial, a picture of a couple flashes across the screen. The girl in the picture looks a lot like Ari, and I pass it off as exhaustion until she continues. "Rudy Torres, the newest player for the Los Angeles Galaxy, may have already found love in L.A. More for you when we get back." The screen fades to black as they go to commercial.
My pulse picks up and it's not from the coffee. There's no way. She wouldn't. I repeat to myself. It's the longest three minutes of my life, and I'm about to rip the damn TV from the wall when the show finally comes back. After another three minutes of bullshit celebrity drama, there it is. Picture after picture of Ari and Rudy. One of them getting into her car, another one of them going into a parking structure. The nail in my coffin is a picture of her coming out of his apartment the next morning wearing the same outfit. It's the worst fucking case of Deja vu I've ever had. The blood rushing in my ears keeps me from hearing what they have to say.
My phone rings and her name flashes across the screen, just as they break for commercial. Her timing is impeccable.
"I thought I asked you never to see him again," I grit.
I'm barely keeping it together, and if I wasn't in an airport, I think I would have already smashed half of the shit in here. Her silence is making me nervous, and I can hear her walking.
“What are you talking about?” she asks.
“Rudy,” his name is like acid on my tongue.
"It's not what you're thinking, Ben. I got caught up in a situation, and he was there and it's complicated, okay. He was just being a friend. He knows we're together."
"Situation? So my girlfriend's in trouble, doesn't tell me about it, and her ex, who’s still in love with her, just happens to be there? Did I get that right?" I spit.
"Yes. It sounds horrible I know, but-"
"Sounds horrible. That's not even the worst of it. There are pictures, Ari. Tons of pictures of you coming out of his apartment, of you hugging him, kissing his face. You spent the night?" I've raised my voice, and the security guard is starting to take notice.
"I did, but nothing happened. Please, I'm just asking you to trust me. I promise you it's not what you think. I'll tell you everything. Just let me sort it out. Please."
"Do you still love him, Ari?"
"No," she answers quickly.
"You trusted him with something you won't share with me. You must still feel something for the guy, if you’re willing to jeopardize us to do that."
"What are you saying? It's not like that, babe, please. I love you so much. You hav
e to believe me," she says through a cry.
"I want to, but you've made it really hard. You won’t talk to me, so I don't know what to believe anymore."
I hang up, as I’m unable to handle the sounds of her quiet sobs. The overhead speaker announces that my flight is boarding. I grab my carry-on and prepare myself for the longest five-and-a-half-hour flight of my life.
My hands tremble as I stare at the blank screen of my phone. Letty and Dr. Stone warned me this would happen. Now, I'm hoping it's not too late to fix it. My lunch break is nearly over; I still have half a day of work to get through before I can talk to him again—if he even takes my call. I'm hoping a night’s sleep will calm him. I text him a quick I love you and check my face before heading back up to the office.
Turning the corner to get back to my desk, I’m surprised to see Natalie. She's been gone almost the whole week. She called out Monday and Tuesday and has been helping Jeremy and Mr. Dietrich in court for the last two days. I've tried calling and texting, and she hasn't returned any of my messages.
"Hey, stranger, feeling better?" I ask.
"Fine, thanks," she says coldly. Jeremy is placing a file on her desk when she answers, and he looks at me questioningly. I shrug my shoulders and take a seat at my desk.
"Can I talk to you in the conference room?" She waited for Jeremy to close the door to his office before asking.
"Sure." She pushes away from her desk angrily, and I follow her into the small room that sits across from her.
"Are you mad at me? Why haven't you returned any of my calls?"
"I need you to stop coming on to him. You already have Ben."
"Wait. What?" I ask confused.
"Gabe. Amos. Whatever you call him. He told me that you keep coming on to him and that it's starting to get uncomfortable because you’re with his nephew."
I feel like she just sucker-punched me in the gut. She can't be fucking serious.
"I'm sorry to tell you this, Natalie, and maybe if you would have answered my calls this week, I could have warned you that your boyfriend is a fucking psycho. He's been stalking me since I was a teenager."