“What are you trying to do?” my voice is deep, raw, stripped of emotions, hoping to startle him. And I do - I hear him jumping and falling.
“What does it look like?” he bangs on the door with his fist, irritated I scared him. “I’m coming home!” I’m already alarmed by his maddening voice. This is the Thomas I don’t know. He’s the one who hit me. He’s the one who wanted to kill me.
“You don’t live here anymore!” I continue, my voice firm but what am I trying to do? Scare him? It’s me who’s petrified!
He hammers on the door with both fists, so loud I’m sure he’s going to wake everyone.
“Open the door, Amelia! Open it!” he starts banging. At this rate the whole neighborhood will wake up and just as I think of it, I see Mrs. Saunders coming down the stairs.
“Who is that, Amelia?”
“It’s Thomas,” I say quietly. “He’s crazy, maybe drunk, I’m not sure.”
“Thomas, calm down, you’ll wake the children!” I plead with him.
“I don’t care! Let them wake up! Let them see that you’re not letting me in! I’m their father for fuck’s sake! Amelia! OPEN THIS DOOR!”
“Thomas, I’m calling the police right now! Your bail is going down the drain! You’ll be locked up for good this time! Back off!”
I turn around and Michael and Jason are standing on the landing, looking at me.
“Aunt Lia, is that dad?” Michael asks.
“Sorry you had to hear that, kids. Your dad’s not feeling well; I think he needs help.”
“Police? POLICE? Fuck you Amelia! Fuck you! Just…fuck you! Nothing scares me anymore! Not the police, or anyone! You can fucking go and say that to your boyfriend!”
“Come, let’s all go back to bed. Let your aunt deal with him.” Mrs. Saunders quickly ushers Michael and Jason into their bedroom.
They don’t complain. They’re either tired or scared.
“Yeah, you heard me, you bitch!” Thomas continues. “Fuck you and your boyfriend!”
Alexander! I quickly run into the kitchen in search of my bag and upon finding it, I pull out my cell. I haven’t dialed anyone’s number this fast. I’m calling him; I don’t care anymore about the consequences. I need my family safe and by the time the police respond it might be too late. Alexander will make him pay for this!
The line rings and rings and… Where is he? There’s no reply.
“Open the damn door, Amelia!” I hear his vile voice again and I honestly think this is it! This is the end! My hands are shaking but I don’t give up. I persistently dial Alexander’s number hoping he’ll pick it up in time.
Amid all the commotion, I suddenly hear a car stopping outside and someone’s voice calling Thomas. They argue over something and I hear a door slamming and a car driving off. Soon after, another car ignites and drives away too. Then silence.
Eerie silence. I’m expecting to see Thomas stabbing the door with a large knife any moment now. But it seems like he’s gone. However, I dare not open the door. I’m shaking, I’m scared. Could that have been John O’Prey? Probably. He’s the only one who can control Thomas these days.
Trembling inside, I walk up the stairs and look through the window. His car is gone and no one’s at the door anymore.
I take a few steps backwards and sit on my bed, my shoulders drooping. I actually feel it inside, my breakdown. The sea of despair is dragging me slowly under its crushing waves; I’ve started to cry, my deep painful sobs punctuating the silence. My vision blurs from the tears and from the adrenaline, dispersing slowly in my blood and I lie in my bed. I was...all alone. Alexander wasn’t available. I sob into the sheets and only then do I hear my phone buzzing.
“Where were you?” I talk through my tears.
“Amelia, what happened? Are you all right?” Alexander’s panicked voice comes a little too late.
“No! I’m not all right! I needed you!” I break down and sob. “I needed you tonight! I was scared, for me, for the boys, and you…you weren’t there… where were you? Where were you?” I bawl.
“I was having dinner with Max, but the phone was with me all the time. I’m not sure how it went on silent. It must have been Max, he was playing with it earlier!”
Crying without an end, I’ve stopped listening to him.
“It was Thomas!” I blubber. “He came banging on the door, I thought he’d kill us all, he wanted to knock the door down. The children heard him, it was so scary…” I weep. “And you...you weren’t there…”
“WHAT?? Dammit Amelia, I’ve had enough of him!” he growls. “I’m going to kill the fucking bastard!!”
His deafening voice makes me move the handset back from my ear but doesn’t help with my dread, with my helplessness.
“As of now, I decide about your safety!”
I just cry, whatever he says is too late. I needed him earlier.
“Quinn will be by your door until the morning comes. You hear me?”
I nod and say yes at the same time. I’m not into anyone guarding me but this, this is different. I want my nephews protected. If I’m going to do one thing right in my life is look after my sisters kids, as I promised her.
“Thank you,” I sniffle.
“Don’t thank me! This is being reactive, not proactive!” exasperated, he sighs. “I’m coming over, I want to make sure you’re okay.”
“No!” I say nasally. “I know Max is with you.”
“I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”
“No, please.” I sniffle. “Just don’t ever go missing on me again.”
“When I get my hands on that little piece of shit....”
“Please, just promise me.”
“I promise you. This won’t happen again, ever.”
~
Waking up every few hours, I barely slept at all. I had to make sure Quinn was outside my house, keeping us safe. In the morning, the feeling of anxiety dissipated and, with Quinn gone and the daylight in, I decide to head to work early.
Leaving a note for Mrs. Saunders, I leave the house quietly.
Arriving at the office at half past seven, I walk from the elevator to my desk in silence. There are only a few other people around, working on their computers. My attention is drawn to Jennifer. She’s here? Standing by Alexander’s office, next to Quinn, she’s fretting. I speed up my steps and as I approach them, I can clearly hear a commotion coming from inside the office.
“Quinn, what’s going on?”
He just stares above my head, in the distance, completely ignoring me.
“Jennifer?”
“Um…I came in early today, I have so much work for the project and shortly after I saw Mr. Reeves dragging your bother in law inside. I’m so sorry, Amelia.”
“What?” I turn to Quinn. “Quinn, step away!” He makes eye contact but doesn’t move. “If he kills him it’s going to be on you.” I see him having second thoughts and, hearing Alexander’s grunting from inside, but not a sound from Thomas, seems to make him reevaluate his stance and he steps back.
I enter and see Thomas sitting on Alexander’s leather chair, unconscious, tied with a belt around his waist and arms. Alexander is standing above him, his hair ruffled and with a crazy look in his eyes, his blows coming one after another on Thomas. His knuckles are bloody from the impact.
“Alexander! Stop it!! What are you doing?” I scream and run to him, trying to hold his arms but I’m helpless.
“You fucking insignificant little piece of shit! I have other things to worry about! You will never-come-near-her-again! You HEAR me? Never!”
He stops, delivering one last blow to the already unconscious man and looks at me with a sweaty, maddening look in his eyes.
“Nobody is taking you away from me.”
“Nobody is, Alexander. Calm down.”
“Quinn, get this piece of shit back to where he came from!”
“Of course, Mr. Reeves.” I hear Quinn’s voice behind me.
“And on your way back, b
ring Max with you.” He turns to me. “Amelia, call your babysitter, get her to bring Jason and Michael in here. They’ll be back for school in time.”
“What? But…”
“Don’t! Just fucking don’t!” he snaps.
~
Alexander hasn’t said a word for the last thirty minutes. He’s still breathing raggedly, clearly agitated. Even beating Thomas didn’t help. I’m standing, partly leaning on his desk, observing him closely. Max is here already, sitting on the settee, all quiet. I guess we’re both afraid to say anything.
Jennifer knocks and opens the door and Michael and Jason walk in, with Mrs. Saunders standing behind them.
“Aunt Lia? Why are we here? Aren’t we going to school today?” Michael is first to ask, but upon seeing Max he smiles and nudges Jason. “Hey, look who’s here!” Max is confused; he smiles at them but looks at me, realizing they are here for me.
Alexander is standing behind the door and the moment the door closes and they see him, their smiles vanish. Figuring out in a split second who Max’s dad is, they pucker their eyebrows and, close up.
“Sit down!”
Jason sits next to Max but Michael looks at me, almost defiantly when I hear Alexander’s voice again, startling me and everyone else in here.
“SIT. DOWN.”
“Now, listen to me, all of you! THIS,” he takes my hand and wraps his other arm around my waist, “Is our FUCKING life! Stop fucking it up for us! Amelia is my soulmate – a woman I love– you’re too young to know what it means but I’ll be damned if I’m going to let anyone fuck it up for me!”
Max just stares at him, surprised and, maybe scared.
“D..Dad?”
“Max, I love you more than the world itself, I love you more than anyone else ever but what I have right now is something I don’t want to lose. When you’re older, you’ll understand. And you two,” he looks at Michael and Jason, “I’m not your father. I will never be him. I’m someone your aunt loves to spend her time with. I’m telling you this, and please listen carefully. I will NOT take her away from you. Same as she won’t take me away from you, Max. But let’s be fucking adults and understand the concept of love, for FUCK’s sake!”
He’s still upset but fuck, he must know all this swearing in front of the children is not good.
“Aunt Lia?” I hear Michael’s scared voice.
I clear my throat. I have to support Alexander, he’s given me no other option. His actions caught me unprepared but still, there is so much truth in what he said. I hope they’ll see our side.
“He’s right. It’s time to grow up. There’s a big chance we’ll move back to San Francisco, too. Close to nana.” Jason and Michael look at each other. “We’re not going to live together, but Alexander and I will certainly socialize. You’d better get used to that. All of you!”
I make a pause and observe them. Nobody makes a sound.
“Now, come on you two, it’s school time.”
Jason and Michael get up and walk silently to the door, stunned.
Mrs. Saunders greets them outside and I wave at her to take them away. Quinn walks in and Alexander motions Max to go with Quinn.
As the door closes behind them I turn around and meet Alexander’s icy blue stare fixed on me. God knows if he did the right thing but at least now it’s out in the open. They know. No more drip-feeding them information. From now on, it’s only the truth.
“Go home and pack your bags, you’re moving in with me today.”
CHAPTER 3
“What? No! Didn’t you hear me? I just told them we won’t be living together. I’m not going back on my word!”
“Amelia, do not defy me!” his voice is stern, resolute.
“This is not about you, Alexander! This is about me and my family!”
“You are my family now!” he thunders. “And I’ll be god damned if I’ll let you stay one more night alone! That lunatic may be incapacitated for a day or two, but he’ll be back. He’ll never give you up!”
The thought makes the hair on my back prickle and I take a deep breath, trying to evaluate the situation. I’m ready to fight but what if he’s right? What if that’s the safest option for us?
“Fuck, Alexander,” frustrated, I curse. “What am I going to do?”
“Nothing will change for your nephews, trust me. Quinn will take them to school every day and back.” His voice becomes softer, more caring. “Your babysitter, Mrs. Saunders, can come too. If she cooks for you, I’m sure she won’t mind cooking for a few more people.”
“Didn’t you hear me just now?” I say in exasperation. “I told them we won’t be living together!”
“Look, the floor below is a self-contained flat. There are four ensuite bedrooms; each one of you will have your own room. There’s a kitchen down there too, with a large dining area.”
“That’s way too much to take from you. I already feel like a burden and now you’re going to take in my family plus my babysitter?”
“Too much? We’re getting married for fuck’s sake!”
“I’m not sure, Alexander. We’ve been living at the house for almost three years and…. I mean, what do I do with it?”
“You can’t do much. As soon as Thomas’s trial starts his lawyer will probably suggest he sells the house to pay for his bills. You can’t even rent it.”
“Wh…what?” shocked, I slowly lean back on the desk. “Oh….” I might lose the house? Shit, I never meant to use any of Alexander’s money and now… Now I’m beginning to see the depth of the abyss Thomas left behind.
“Let me think about it, please.” If I’m honest, I don’t know where to start.
“Amelia, please understand,” he cups my face gently. “My house has better security and Quinn lives right next door. He’s a really good man; I trust him with my life.”
He wraps his arms around me. “I’m not letting you go, Amelia. You’ve got to understand that.”
~
Michael and Jason have been quiet all afternoon. I told them we’re going out for a dinner with Alexander and Max and they didn’t say anything. They just got ready and waited for me. Strange. As long as I talk to them openly, they’ll figure out how to act correctly by themselves.
I personally am not sure this is such a good idea but according to Alexander, we have to follow it through. Whether it’s going to be a fiasco or not is yet to be determined.
“This way, please.” The hostess ushers us in and as we walk behind her, Jason and Michael observe their surroundings. They’ve never been to a restaurant like this. Trendy. Expensive. We’ve never taken them out at all. Thomas was always attending events and I was either uninterestedly following him there or I was at home with the boys.
“Here we are, Miss Jones. Mr. Reeves has been expecting you.” Having led us to the end of the grandiose room she leaves us in front of a large table where Alexander and Max are already seated.
“Amelia!” Alexander smiles and standing up, he comes closer and kisses my cheek. “Glad you could make it.”
I copy his behavior and smile broadly. “Good to see you, Alexander.” A bit dramatic, we’re both playing our parts. “Max.” I nod at his son indifferently and I’m met with similar feeling.
“Michael, Jason, please, sit down.” It’s obvious where they have to sit. The three of them sitting opposite us is a deliberate move strategically done by Alexander so they feel uncomfortable enough until they start talking to each other. Let’s hope the plan works. After this morning, Michael and Jason were apprehensive about coming here tonight.
The maitre’d approaches and Alexander orders only for us two, sending him on the other side of the table to get the children’s order and asking him to give them whatever they want and take as long as he can. He’s determined to make this dinner a success.
“Hey,” I lean towards him and whisper, “Are you okay?” his tension is visible.
He takes a deep breath and exhaling, he turns to me, brushing our cheeks together and h
is lips end up almost touching mine. Instinctively, I move back a little. I’m not prepared to have a full blown kiss in front of the boys. Not now. Not ever.
“You make it all better, always,” he murmurs against my skin.
“I’ve missed you.” I look into his eyes and see the already familiar shackles, still there, waiting to bind me. This time, I caught myself in there.
“Oh, Amelia, don’t look at me like that,” his words effortlessly fuel such need in me, “You know I can’t resist you.”
I blink a few times and cut our connection abruptly, although the fire inside of me is still blazing.
“Me? It’s you, Alexander. You’ve always had this hold over me whenever you wanted.” I look in front of me uncomfortably, making sure the children are not staring. “Don’t do that again. I beg you.”
“I didn’t do anything,” he continues talking quietly. “But now that you’re begging, I think we’re having the right conversation.” He turns his body to me properly. “Amelia.” His firm voice makes me hold my stance even more. “Look at me.”
“No.” I play with the neatly folded napkin lying on the table in front of me. “I can’t lose my mind now, we’ve talked about this.”
I hear him sighing and feel his hand on my thigh. Ah, how I need his touch. My body lights up, my legs open slightly and I bite my lip, looking at him from under the strand of hair fallen over my eyes.
“Fuck, Amelia,” he grips my thigh harder. “How do you do that? You make me hard in a second.”
I glance over at the children, making sure they’re not following our conversation. “Alexander, we haven’t... um... I mean…it’s been a while since…um…you know, we’ve played properly.”
“Played?” I know he knows what I mean.
“With all the…um…tools of the trade, so to say.”
“To be honest, I don’t know what you’re talking about. We both know in order to play one has to be a good, obedient submissive.” He pauses while his eyes dart all over my face. “Do you think you’re a good submissive, Amelia?” his voice, patronizing.
The Collar of Sacrifice Page 5