She looked at the house, enthralled by her new home. As a kid it had seemed like a castle. She had never imagined that she could one day own it. To a little ghetto girl in the hood, a house in New Rochelle was everything. YaYa had truly found her Prince Charming when she met Indie; he had made her every dream come true.
“How did you know about this?” she asked, dumbfounded. It was as if Indie lived in her thoughts and knew her deepest secrets without her ever having to tell him.
“A friend of mine helped me pick it out,” he replied vaguely. He nodded toward the house. “Go ahead and check it out, ma,” he said softly as he removed the key from his ring and handed it to her.
She snatched it up giddily and hopped out of the car as she bounced happily to the front door. She admired the yard that was blanketed in snow. She could see her children growing up there, building snowmen in the winter and running through sprinklers in the summer. This home was so sentimentally valuable for her that she felt overwhelmed by it. It meant security, it symbolized love . . . it was the perfect gift. There wasn’t anything greater that she could have been given because Indie had done his research. It was heartfelt, and the intention of the gift outweighed everything else.
She placed the key inside the lock and leaned her shoulder against the door as she turned the knob. Inside stood a giant Christmas tree. It was so huge that the star almost touched the ceiling as it illuminated the foyer. The smell of pine needles filled her nose as she turned to Indie and smiled. “Thank you,” she said.
“You’re welcome,” he replied. “I love you, Disaya. I want to love you forever, ma. I know things haven’t always been simple between us, but when you’re in my life I feel complete.” Indie reached into his inside jacket pocket and pulled out a black ring box. He got down on one knee and grabbed her hands into his.
She gasped, then laughed, then gasped again. “Boy!” she screamed in delight. YaYa could not fathom what was happening. This scene, this proposal was something that other girls got to experience, not her. This was too grand; Indie was too good for her.
Indie chuckled slightly and flashed a charming grin. It was the same crooked smile that had hooked her from day one.
“Ain’t you forgetting something, young’un?”
The deep baritone voice echoed through the home, and Indie gave YaYa a wink before she turned toward the voice. Before her stood Buchanan Slim, the only father she had ever known.
“Daddy?” she whispered. She looked back at Indie then to Slim. Her hand covered her mouth in utter disbelief.
“This is the friend I was telling you about, the one who helped me choose this house,” Indie said.
She remembered the day she had lost him. YaYa had never expected to see him again, never expected to face him. She had grown so much resentment toward him in the years that he had been absent from her life, but none of it seemed to matter now that he was standing in front of her.
She ran to her father and hugged his neck tightly. Losing him had caused her so much confusion. The day that he was taken from her life she became another lost little girl with no direction. Without a mother or a father to guide her, she wandered through life, figuring everything out by trial and error. She hadn’t realized how much she missed him until this very moment.
He wrapped his arms around YaYa, embracing her in a large hug as she bawled into his shoulder.
“I love you, YaYa. I know we have a lot to talk about, and we will get our chance, but I think right now Indie has something he wants to finish,” Slim said. She sniffed and nodded her head as she stood between the only two men in her life that she had ever loved.
“With your blessing, Slim, I would like to ask your daughter to marry me,” Indie said.
“I couldn’t have chosen a better man if I handpicked you myself, young’un. My blessing is easy. I just wish I hadn’t been trapped in the system, so I could give my daughter to you the right way and pay for your wedding,” Slim said.
“Your blessing is more than enough,” Indie said. He turned to YaYa, focusing all of his attention on her. “How about it, ma? You want to kick it until forever with me?” he asked.
YaYa nodded and couldn’t stop the laughter from escaping her. Only Indie would put it so eloquently. It wasn’t cookie-cutter, it wasn’t the corny, begging, Keith Sweat proposal. It was done in true gangster form, and in YaYa’s eyes it was absolutely perfect.
“Yes,” she replied.
He stood to his feet and scooped her up in his arms as he shouted, “That’s a yes, people!”
Suddenly applause erupted in the house and Chase, Trina, and Miesha’s family came entering the room, all elated. YaYa looked around and then asked, “Where’s Skylar? Where are your parents? Why aren’t they here?”
Her voice was so eager it was as if she were feenin’ for her daughter’s presence. It had been too long since the last time she had seen Skylar’s precious face.
“They’re running a little late. They got caught in traffic, but they will be here,” Slim spoke up.
Disappointment filled YaYa’s expression, but Indie gave her hand a gentle, reassuring squeeze. “Why don’t we get dinner started,” he suggested. YaYa pulled away from him and pointed toward the stairs.
“Is the bathroom this way?” she asked.
He nodded his head and said, “Take your time, baby girl. Get acquainted with your new house. We won’t get started without you.”
“You better not,” she replied with a smile as she ascended the stairs. She couldn’t help but admire what Indie had done with the place. It was fully furnished with the finest pieces that money could buy. He had taken care of every detail, down to the white Audi A8 that he had waiting for her in the three-car garage. All it needed was her touch to make things complete.
She peeped into every room until she located the master bedroom. She flopped down on the plush king-sized bed and pulled the pill bottle out of her Birkin. Her smile disappeared as she looked at the orange bottle. Indie had just proposed to her. He had just professed his undying love. Why wasn’t that enough to erase all of her pain away? She knew that Indie made her happy, but lately she was so up and down that she was tired of the roller coaster ride. She wanted to feel nothing but bliss. This was a day that she would remember forever, and she didn’t want any negative thoughts to creep into her mind and spoil her mood, so she opened the bottle and swallowed three pills without water.
YaYa could feel herself slipping further and further into the comforting arms of addiction. She had underestimated the drug’s ability to hook her. For some reason, in her head prescription pills were the lesser of two evils. It was okay because a doctor had given them to her, but her misuse of the drug had created a vice. She had developed a nasty habit, but it was one that felt too good to let go of.
What Indie doesn’t know won’t hurt him, she thought. I’ve got everything under control. It’s not like I can’t stop.
By the time she made it back to the dining table she was on cloud nine. YaYa sat at the head of the table on a mental and physical high as she felt the effects of the pills coursing through her body. At this point YaYa was mixing Oxy with Vicodin, which was a deadly combination, but she didn’t care. YaYa no longer took the pills for pain; she took them for pleasure. They gave her a calm that she had never experienced before, a certain orgasmic experience that made her entire body pulse with pleasure. It provided her with a confidence that no one could break. She had gone from taking one whenever her pain was at its peak to taking three to four at a time every few hours. The feeling was euphoric, almost orgasmic. It was like breathing in warm air after being locked out in the freezing cold. Like having her skin massaged by the warm currents of the Caribbean waters. It gave her balance, made her hectic life easier to manage and her past easier to forget.
This dinner was for celebratory purposes. They were toasting it up to the good life, but also commemorating the hard times of the past and putting them to bed. YaYa had made her first million almost effortlessl
y, and it was finally time for her to be reunited with her daughter. She would have been full of nervous energy if it had not been for her magical little pill that helped her maintain her cool.
She wasn’t sure how Skylar would react to her. It had been too long since she had last bonded with her baby girl.
Will she remember me? YaYa thought. The devil had been busy at work, separating her from her child, but God’s mercy had brought them back together. YaYa vowed to never allow anyone else to keep them apart. Now she was powerful enough to have her enemies touched before they got an opportunity to touch her. Get or get got: That was her new motto, and anyone who posed a threat to her family would be made an example of.
Indie sat across from her at the other end of the king’s table, while the others sat around them. A celebration was in store. Their first flip had been flawless. Not one of YaYa’s mules had been caught, and now they were sitting on a stash of cocaine that was worth millions. The streets were ready for the taking, but first they were going to feast like royalty as they lived it up for the night, celebrating YaYa and Indie’s engagement.
“How is Miesha holding up on the inside?” YaYa asked.
“She’s good. She’s just biding her time until she is released. Six months is nothing. She’s staying strong,” Trina said.
YaYa nodded. “Good. Make sure she has everything she needs in there. Keep her books on full. When she gets out, we’ll move her here to New York.”
“Thank you,” Miesha’s mother said.
“You’re welcome, Marilyn,” YaYa said as she reached over and squeezed the woman’s hand.
The doorbell rang and Indie arose, knowing that it was his parents. YaYa stood eagerly.
Indie rounded the table and grabbed her hand. “You ready?”
YaYa nodded as she flashed the brightest smile that had ever decorated her face. He escorted her to the front door and opened it.
“Oh, YaYa,” Elaine exclaimed as she hugged her tightly. “You don’t know how good it is to see you standing here in front of me.”
YaYa hugged her tightly. The two women had formed a bond of love and respect. It warmed her to see Elaine again.
“My baby,” she whispered as she set her sights on Skylar, who lay asleep in Indie’s father’s arms.
“Good to see you, YaYa,” Bill greeted.
There was always some tension whenever the two interacted, although they both had made an unspoken pact to never admit why. She gave him a nod and opened her arms to receive her flesh and blood.
Holding Skylar in her arms again warmed her to the core, and YaYa couldn’t help but cry. Her makeup ran down her face as streams of emotions fell down her cheeks.
“I love you, Skylar. Mommy loves you so much,” she whispered, rousing the toddler from her sleep. “Oh my God, she’s gotten so big,” she noticed aloud as she held her closely to her chest. She could feel the beat of her tiny heart, and it warmed her soul. “It feels like I’ve missed so much.” YaYa took in all of her daughter. She inhaled her scent, caressed the natural curls of her delicate hair, and kissed the top of her head as she cradled her back and forth in her arms. She savored this moment, wishing that she could make it last forever. In that exact moment of time, nothing could have been more perfect. With all of her loved ones around her, YaYa felt complete for the first time since her mother had died, and she was overcome with emotions as she reveled in her own joy.
The sight pulled at Indie’s heart strings, and as he looked around the room, everyone had tears in their eyes as they witnessed a mother’s true love. All of YaYa’s emotions were enhanced by the drugs that coursed through her system, but she didn’t mind. She enjoyed the overwhelming love that flowed from her to her daughter, and she cried freely. It didn’t matter who was looking. She let the crystal clear tears flow down her face.
Skylar rubbed her doe-shaped eyes as she awakened slowly.
“Hi, Mommy’s Girl. Hi, baby,” YaYa whispered.
As if no time had passed at all, recognition lit up Skylar’s face and she called out, “Mama.”
It was the first time YaYa had heard that word. It was the sweetest melody she had ever heard.
“That’s right, Sky. I’m Mama. I missed you so much,” she whispered. Now that they had been reunited, she would never let her daughter go. The fact that Leah had even been able to get to Skylar meant that YaYa was slipping. It would never happen again. She was more determined than ever before to make sure that Leah no longer posed a threat to her family. Being locked up wasn’t enough; being burnt up wasn’t enough. Leah deserved to take a dirt nap, and YaYa was just the person to put her to sleep.
One glance was all it took to reestablish the connection between mother and child. Despite Leah’s efforts to break their bond, Skylar remembered YaYa. She knew whom she belonged to. No matter how much time had passed or the amount of distance that had come between them, she could never forget the woman who had birthed her. Their bond was unbreakable.
Indie came up behind them and kissed the top of YaYa’s head. Slim walked up behind the couple and interrupted. “Do you mind if I have a moment with YaYa?” he asked.
“Not at all,” Indie said. He shook Slim’s hand then led everyone else into the dining room.
This father and daughter moment was long overdue, and as Slim admired his lovely YaYa, he regretted all of the time that he had missed in her life. He didn’t know what had led her to this point. He had no idea how she had become the woman she was today, and it pained him.
“You look good, baby girl,” Slim said. “It’s so good to lay eyes on you.”
“You too,” she replied. Her voice trembled because she knew how much she used to love him, knew the admiration that she had held for him in her heart.
“You can be upset with me, YaYa. You deserve to be upset with me,” he admitted. “I was a selfish young man. My ways hurt a lot of people, including your mother, including you. I promise you that I will make this up to you. I will try to right my wrongs,” he said.
She admired Slim. His promises still meant everything to her, despite the ones that he had broken in the past. She had tried to convince herself over the years that she hated him, that he had never truly loved her, but she knew that it was false. He wasn’t even her paternal father, but he had loved her from day one. As she witnessed tears accumulating in his eyes, she saw nothing but genuine emotion.
“Are you Leah’s father?” she asked.
“Everyone else who asked me that, I’ve told them no. I just got back into your life, YaYa, so I don’t want to start out lying to you. Honestly, I don’t know. I could be. I always thought I was sterile. Doctors told me that a long time ago. But who really knows? I used her mother, had unprotected sex with her mother. I very well could be, but I’m not certain,” he answered.
“So you shunned your possible daughter and doted all over me? Why? I’m not even your blood,” she asked.
“But you’re the blood of the woman I loved. I have only truly loved one woman, and that was your mother. The moment that she had you, I thought you were more precious than gold. Seeing her carry you in her belly, aw, man, what a sight,” Slim said, staring off in space briefly as he drifted back down memory lane. “She was the prettiest when she was pregnant. It suited her. I used to place my hand on her belly and tap a little rhythm as I sang to you. It always seemed like you danced to my tune, because I would feel you moving around in there. You see, baby girl, I was there with you from conception. I rubbed your mama’s feet, made late-night runs when she had cravings for peanut butter and bananas,” he said, causing YaYa to smile.
“Witnessing your birth, waking up for late-night feedings with you, I was there for all of that. You and your mother had locks on my heart that no other girl or woman could remove. I didn’t have any room for Leah in my heart because I only had eyes for the two of you.”
“So you weren’t grooming me? You wouldn’t have put me to work the moment my ass started to sprout or the curves of my body came i
n? I wasn’t just an investment?” she asked.
Slim placed a hand over his heart as if her words had wounded him, and he shook his head. “Oh no, baby girl. You were the only evidence of purity I ever saw. I would never ruin that. Ever. I know that I did some bad things in the past and I wasn’t there for you as a child, and if you don’t want me here, I understand.”
“I want you here,” she replied quickly. “I would like to get to know you if that’s okay.”
She hugged Slim, and he grabbed both shoulders and said, “I will try to make this right. I’ll do everything in my power to heal the wounds that I left open all that time ago.”
They walked hand in hand into the dining room and joined in on the feast.
All of the pieces of the puzzle seemed to come together. Indie sat back and watched as YaYa transformed before his eyes. Where there had been sadness, he now saw extreme happiness. She was drunk on love, and as their eyes met from across the room, he gave her a wink. It was satisfying seeing his incredible woman thrive again. She had been down for so long that she deserved this come-up.
They feasted over a five-course meal as they popped bottles, living it up among themselves. They were all that they had. The people sitting around the table were family and had proved their loyalty to the team. Her heart felt full, overflowing with an emotion that was so overwhelming that she had to let some of it out. She wiped her eyes as tears involuntarily fell. Things felt normal for the first time in her life. She was surrounded by people who loved her, and her family was intact. Life couldn’t be better, but if things were as great as they seemed, why did she still have the overwhelming urge to pop pills? She was becoming frustrated with the short-time highs. She needed something stronger.
YaYa handed her daughter off to Elaine and she snuck away from the crowd to gather herself. I just need to take the edge off, she thought as she rushed over to her leather Birkin and spilled the contents out onto the bed. Every pair of eyes in the house were on her. So many people had so many expectations of YaYa. It was as if at any moment they thought she would crack and nobody wanted to miss it.
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