“Like your father?” James asked.
Fred frowned. “My father and a footman? No.”
“No. A maid,” James said.
“A maid? I knew about the mistress. I won’t be like him. Not that I’d suppose you were worried I’d seduce your Harry.” Fred pushed for a reaction.
James closed the jar of salve and put it back. “He’s not mine.”
“Pardon?” Fred prompted for more.
“This is not appropriate,” he refused.
“The conversation or that you want to touch me?” Fred asked.
“Sir, I don’t have a lover. I can’t enter into anything with you. What you’re doing here is too important. It’s risky and bold. I admire you for it but I don’t believe it could ever work. Not the way I’d want it to. Not really. Better to not start something than to lose it and possibly fall out.” James took the towel from Fred and wiped his hands on it.
Fred had a split second to seize the moment. He couldn’t force an intimacy but he hadn’t started things. War might be an excuse for other men. Strangers found comfort in each other but Fred and James both knew who they were and what they desired before the war. James had kissed Fred during the war. Now it was his turn.
“I need to know.” Fred grabbed the lapel of James’ jacket and pulled him in.
The kiss wasn’t rejected. Fred nibbled at James’ lips at first, teasing him. James’ hand slid behind Fred’s neck and his mouth crushed as Fred’s as their tongues met.
Fred didn’t let go of James’s jacket until his butler leaned in for more. Whatever James feared about crossing social lines, their desires were equally aligned.
Chapter Four
James woke the next morning the same way he’d fallen asleep, thinking about that kiss with Fred. It would’ve been so easy to slip into bed with him and forget about everything else. Up here at the remote estate they could almost be alone.
But they weren’t alone. Sixteen gay men were here for training and work. James had to set the example. He’d seen romance between a servant and a family member in his first post as a hall boy, and it ended with the footman jailed for what the family said was an attack on their daughter.
All of the staff knew she’d been in love with the footman. She’d even protested the arrest but at sixteen, she was a child. The victim. James learned a hard lesson young. Crossing the line was too dangerous. Even if he weren’t gay, it wasn’t safe to mix with the upper class.
It was his own fault. He’d slipped during the war. In a weak moment he’d kissed Fred, fueling the spark that wouldn’t die.
Harry was convenient. He was attractive, yes. He’d sleep with anyone.
James tossed off the covers and tried to ignore the nightmare image that popped into his head. If Harry made a move on Fred…
After a quick wash at the sink, he dressed and combed his hair. He was early but that was his gift. Until they had a hall boy, he’d wake everyone.
The footmen shared four rooms with four men to a room. James knocked sharply on each door to wake them, then opened the door.
“Downstairs in thirty minutes dressed to work,” James said firmly.
He’d overlooked two men in one bed in a couple of rooms. That was likely to happen. He couldn’t police them that closely. As long as all parties were willing, he’d turn a blind eye.
He headed downstairs and check in at the kitchen.
“Morning ladies,” he said.
“Morning, Mr. Riggs,” Mrs. O’Malley said. “Servants’ breakfast in thirty minutes.”
“Good. I’ll take breakfast up to the colonel and get him dressed. You have his tray?” Riggs asked.
She nodded to the tray on the table. “All ready. Paul has been doing it.”
“I’ll handle it from now on. Thank you. A normal schedule for lunch and dinner. We need to put the men through their paces but the colonel’s leg is still healing. I think we can do with a mock upstairs breakfast so as not to waste any of your delicious food and spare the colonel the stairs early.” Riggs nodded.
“Mr. Riggs,” Mrs. Flynn said.
“Good morning. Do you need anything from the footmen today?”
“All under your direction. The colonel’s London paper will come through the post. There isn’t much up here but a small village five miles away and that paper isn’t much to speak of.” She nodded.
“Good to know.” Riggs lifted the tray and headed for the staircase.
“He might not be up yet,” Mrs. O’Malley called.
James knew Fred was an early riser. He’d read and answer letters until it was time to ring the bell. He’d been that way before the military. Heading down the hall to the master bedroom, James heard movement.
“Damn!” Fred said.
James knocked and opened the door. “Colonel?”
The colonel was trying to get up from the floor.
James set the tray on the bed and grabbed Fred under his arms, lifting him off the ground.
“Sorry. Thanks,” Fred said as James eased the colonel to sit on the bed.
James glanced around the room. The cane and crutches were within reach. “Perhaps we should get a push chair for just in here. Your convenience.”
“No,” Fred said.
“You could leave it next to the bed and shift over. It’d be safer in the night,” James said.
“No. I just forget sometimes.” Fred slapped his stump. “I’m still half asleep and forget. It feels like it’s there until I try to stand. My own stupid fault.”
“I understand. It’s not your fault. I just want you to go be safe.” James had watched when a shell exploded, destroying Fred’s leg. It was dumb luck that he’d been positioned so only one leg was hit. It had gutted James to see Fred in agony and amputation had been the only option. Such a strong career military man cut down by one shell.
“That’s why I have to learn. I need to remember I’m a cripple. I can’t just hop out of bed. I need a stick and my replacement leg or the crutches. I won’t let myself get lazy. I don’t need a chair.” Fred applied salve to his scar and slid the linen covering over it.
“Your other leg and your hips are compensating. You don’t need to tax them too much,” James added.
Fred shook his head. “When I’m old, fine. I’m thirty. I won’t be stuck in a chair or in bed.”
“Breakfast?” James asked.
Fred nodded.
“About the hunting.” James moved the tray to Fred’s lap.
“What about it?” Fred downed his coffee and then savored a sip of tea.
“Some hunting occurs on horseback. Have you been on a horse…since?” James asked.
Fred shook his head.
“Can you ride safely? Maybe they can rig something with a sidesaddle,” James suggested.
“Hell, no. With that contraption of a leg I’m sure I can stay on. I’m not riding like a woman.”
“Then you might want to practice. At least it won’t add to your wound. The pressure should stay off it. I’ll let you eat and return to help you dress.” James headed for the door.
“I assume you’ll bring a shadow or two,” Fred said.
“When they are ready.” James nodded.
There was an art to service. James cringed every time the men hesitated. Thomas was clueless but he learned fast. Paul and Patrick were flawless, as was Harry and the others with training. Patrick clearly had been instructed by his mother. The others had been practicing all morning carrying trays of silver and glass.
“Why not do this at breakfast?” Thomas asked.
James cut him a look. “Breakfasts are buffet style. Have you forgotten so quickly?”
“You’re not supposed to talk unless asked a question,” Paul shot at Thomas.
“This is a learning lunch. I realize that the training is tedious and the pomp and circumstance might be dull. But if you find a job in service you can enjoy and get a boss who’ll watch your back if you’re caught—you can have a better life.”
“How nice,” Fred replied.
Harry rolled his eyes at James, who suppressed a grin.
James nodded to Paul and Patrick to clear. He had to point at Thomas to go and fetch the dessert.
The three men disappeared.
Thomas returned and served the dessert but the look on his face wasn’t the neutral expression of a footman.
“Harry, oversee the cleanup,” James said.
Harry nodded. James slipped down to the butler’s pantry and found Paul and Patrick kissing. Their livery was untucked and their hands were busy. They didn’t even hear the door hinge. James stepped back and cleared his throat.
By the time he opened the door again, the men were apart. Disheveled but apart. He gave both of them a cold, disapproving stare the butler at his old house would have been proud of, then turned and stalked back to the dining room.
This was exactly what he knew would happen. The colonel had a lot of grand plans but men would always be men.
Chapter Five
Fred saw improvement over dinner. He’d learned patience since he’d lost his leg. Not with himself but with others. He’d never be able to drive a car with no right leg unless they fashioned some sort of hand control. There were things he’d never done for himself, like cleaning, which didn’t matter. That was normal for the son of an earl, even one who’d been in the military. But things he used to do for himself now needed the help of others.
His butler looked much grimmer than he had at lunch. Fred knew it was about what he’d seen in the pantry. Paul needed some happiness but not while he was on duty. Fred had thought the former hall boy would know better.
After dessert, Fred had a small glass of port and the ache in what was left of his leg eased a bit. He resisted the urge for a second drink.
James put the decanter away.
“When is the servants’ dinner?” Fred asked.
“In about twenty minutes,” James replied.
“Good. I’ll come down with you. We can discuss their behavior together. Set it right now.” Fred stood slowly and planted his cane.
“I can handle that. No need for you to deal with those stairs as well,” James said.
Fred shook his head. “If this were an average household, I’d agree. Here there is more temptation. More opportunity. They need to know the expectations and how it’ll be in a normal house.”
“I’m perfectly capable. Please trust me with that.” James followed Fred as he limped toward the door.
“I need to toughen up and work my muscles. Regain my strength.” Fred pressed on as James remained behind him as a silent sentinel.
The servants’ hall was noisy and friendly. Fred missed that sort of camaraderie he’d had in the army. But all the chatter and laughter stopped the moment they saw him. The men stood from the table, silent and stoic, as did the maids.
“I don’t want to delay your dinner but I wanted to come down and thank you for the hard work. I’ve seen improvement already. I’m going to plan a small party for some close friends. I’ll send the invitations out soon so you’ll need to be company ready in the next few weeks.” Fred paused for a moment to let this information sink in, then cleared his throat. “For those of you not familiar with life in service, this isn’t a typical household. Usually you’ll have more maids and much fewer footmen.”
“Pity,” someone mumbled.
“You’ll have to conceal your behavior from the butler and other servants. The best case is you’re hired on by a friend of mine or an associate who prefers men as well. They can keep an eye out for you. But you have to work during working hours. A couple of you were spotted in the butler’s pantry…not working. Whether it’s you and another footman or you and a maid, that’ll get you in trouble.”
Paul remained expressionless but Patrick’s ears turned red.
Fred wasn’t going to call anyone out.
“I realize many of you have had a very different life. Consider this a warning. Work when you’re on duty. Off duty, you can socialize. Fraternizing is what we called it in the army.”
One of the footmen raised his hand.
“Yes?” Fred called out.
“What about the guests?”
“I explained all of that,” James cut in.
“I want to hear it from him,” replied the young man.
Fred nodded to James. “It’s fine. You’re not required to fraternize with anyone. Not if you bring them a tea tray in the morning and help them dress and undress. You’re hired for your service, not your body. If any guest tries to force you or order you or threaten you, inform Riggs immediately. Likewise, fraternizing amongst yourselves is fine as long as you keep it to your off hours and everyone is agreeable.”
“Everyone clear on the rules?” James asked.
“Yes, sir,” replied the men.
Fred almost added something about intimidation but decided to observe the staff’s behavior a while longer. He’d seen enough of what could happen with men in the army, which had a similar pecking order where the strong took what they wanted. But there were certainly enough willing men here that it shouldn’t be necessary for any of them to act out to get their needs met.
“Good show. Enjoy your dinner. I’ll see you upstairs, Riggs.”
‘Thank you, sir,” Riggs said.
Chapter Six
After putting the colonel to bed, James went back down to the servant’s hall to check on things.
“They’ve all gone to bed,” Mrs. Flynn said.
“Thank you. Please let me know if you see any unacceptable behavior. I won’t let discipline be lax.”
She smiled. “I can handle them. I learned to handle a big brood from my mother but I was also married. My late husband was one of six sons. There isn’t much I haven’t heard.”
“The war?” James asked.
She nodded. “It’s nice to see so many men around. More or less healthy.”
“That is nice. I’m sorry about your husband. Plenty of us have scars we try to hide well.” James resisted the urge to touch his collar.
“True. It makes me feel even more grateful to the colonel knowing he lost a leg. He’s not a fancy aristocrat who never worked or suffered. He’s been kinder than anyone. You knew the colonel a long time?” she asked.
“Yes. You’re safe. You can trust him. Just keep your sisters on the ladies’ side of the servants’ rooms. They don’t need to see their brother or any of the other men up to anything.” Riggs felt safe enough warning a widow to look out for her sisters.
“My sisters know the truth but you’re right. I don’t want them seeing anything like that. I was a nurse during the war but I was already married. Mother and I kept the girls from nursing work that would expose them to such things.” She sighed. “I love it here. The quiet. We’ll find a routine, Mr. Riggs.”
James nodded. “If you need anything, let me know.”
“Same here. You seem uneasy. Is there anything I can do?” she offered.
He shook his head. “I’m concerned about the colonel pushing himself too far too fast. He can’t command an army so he’s creating his own world here. He’s taking a big risk to do it.”
“We’ll take care of him like he takes care of us. If he needs breakfast in bed one of the maids can take it up. We don’t need to stand on strict ceremony here. You can sleep in a bit,” she suggested.
“No, I prefer to tend to him myself. We might benefit from hiring a hall boy from the local village but I don’t want to have him exposed to something and his parents send round the police.” A hall boy would make things look more normal.
“I’ve got a better idea. My late husband’s youngest brother is only ten. His mother is terrified he’ll go into the army. She lost more than one son in the war. I can send for him. He’d stay with on the women’s side until he’s old enough to understand. He can be trained, then get a job elsewhere,” she suggested.
“Since he’s your family that’d be ideal. Let me know the cost and we’ll cover his travel.” James nodded.
“His mother will be grateful. Room and board and learning a skill is a great opportunity for a young lad these days.” The young widow paused, a smile crossing her face. “He’ll drive my mother crazy. He wants to be a chef.” Mrs. Flynn grinned a moment longer, then frowned. “You seem lost, if I might say. If we can help in any other way, please let us know.”
“It’s an adjustment. From the war. From London. As you said, we’ll find a routine. Once we’re through the first party I’m sure it’ll settle.” James turned to leave, a ‘good night’ ready on his lips.
“I see how you look at him. Everyone can see,” she murmured, her voice dropping to a whisper.
James tensed. This was why butlers kept themselves distant from the staff. “I admire him. He’s a war hero and master of this house.”
“We all do. I don’t want you to get hurt is all. It’s risky,” she nodded.
“That’s why there is nothing there. I wouldn’t put the situation at risk. Don’t worry about that,” he said, trying to maintain a bit of ice in his tone to let the housekeeper know his personal feelings were not a topic for discussion.
“Good to know. Then again, I see how he looks at you as well. The normal rules don’t quite apply here, do they?” she said. “I’m going to bed. Good night.”
“Good night.” He nodded and turned stiffly down the hall toward his own room.
If people were noticing it was too dangerous. James had to be vigilant in how he expressed himself.
He was nearly to the stairs when he heard a scuffle in the hall bathroom.
“No, leave me alone,” James heard someone cry out.
He tried the knob but the door was locked. Grabbing the keys from his pocket, he opened the door.
Thomas and Harry had Paul bent over the sink.
“What the devil are you two doing?” James asked.
James (Hot Footman Secrets Book 1) Page 4