Worthy of Love?

by J. Lea

  We sat at our lawyer’s office, awaiting the judge’s verdict. Those were one of the worst hours of my life. Waiting and not knowing what was going to happen, was unbearable. My hands were on my lap, fingers intertwined, my dad was pacing the room, and mom sat by my side, comfortingly patting my back. We were all tense and irritated. The door still hadn’t opened, and tension in the room was so tangible and thick, one could cut it with a knife. An hour later, our lawyer finally stepped into the office. He pointed to my father to sit down, and then he spoke.

  “They found him guilty,” he calmly stated.

  A huge weight fell off my shoulders, and I exhaled in relief. After a long time, I smiled again. Mom and I looked at each other, as dad rushed over to draw me in for a hug. He gave the lawyer a pat on the shoulder.

  “How long will he sit behind bars?”

  “He got three to eight years for abuse of authority. And he lost his coaching license.”

  “What? That’s it? He ruined my daughter’s life, for Christ’s sake. He should get a bigger sentence,” Dad protested.

  “I couldn’t agree more, but this is the way the judiciary system works.”

  “Fuck the system!” Dad exclaimed, throwing his arms in the air. “I can’t believe this.”

  “You can file a complaint, if you want, but I doubt it will help.”

  “George, calm down,” my Mom told him in a soothing voice. “He’s going to jail. That’s all that matters.”

  Dad rubbed his face. “I know. But Lori deserves more. He should rot in jail for the rest of his life. Our daughter deserves so much more.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  November 2014

  18 years old

  “Bye, Holly, see you tomorrow,” I waved at my co-worker. It was three p.m., and I had just finished my shift. That morning, I went to work early because the whole restaurant was reserved for a private gathering. It worked out great for me since I could get off work sooner.

  I parked my car in front of our apartment building and headed to the entrance, when I heard my name being called. I jerked around toward the voice calling me, but I didn’t see anyone.

  “Lori,” I heard it again. I stepped over to the fence by the staircase next to the main entrance. I looked around the corner, and there was Parker, sitting on a motorcycle with his helmet on, only the visor was up so I could recognize him.

  “Parker? What are you doing here?” I hissed, my head turning to the left and right to check if we were being watched.

  “Can we talk? Do you have time?”

  “Sure,” I said after a few seconds. I was afraid to learn what he had to say. “But not here.”

  “Can we go somewhere?”

  “Okay,” I agreed. I quickly texted Mom to let her know I’ll be late, so she wouldn’t be worried.

  I got into my car and followed him. The whole time, dark thoughts invaded my mind. I was certain he regretted yesterday’s kiss. After a thirty-minute drive, we arrived at a small café. I remained seated in my car as I watched him take off his helmet, shake his head so his short hair danced around in the wind, and run his hand through it. When he saw I still hadn’t left the car, he raised an eyebrow at me, and came closer.

  “You comin’?”

  I nodded. “Where are we?”

  “Some place nobody will recognize us. Come.” He opened the door of my car, and led me inside the café by the hand. Parker waited until we were served our drinks, before he reached over the table and took my hand in his. He ran his fingers over the back of my hand, and looked at me.

  “Do you regret what happened last night?” I fired off. I couldn’t wait any longer; I needed to know where we stood. We haven’t had any contact since our last kiss, and it was eating away at me. I wanted to clear things once and for all.

  “No,” he said, without hesitation. “You?”

  “No,” I said just as firmly. We smiled at each other, his hand still on top of mine.

  “Good.”

  “What do we do now?”

  “I want to be with you. I can’t deny this anymore. It won’t be easy, but it’ll be worth the risk.”

  “You sure? I wouldn’t like for you to change your mind later on. It would destroy me.”

  “I won’t change my mind. I’ve never wanted more in my life than this—us. I won’t let anyone else touch you.”

  “There is no one else,” I squeezed his hand. He needed to know my eyes only saw him.

  “What about Rick, or what’s-his-name? And Elias? Are you still just friends?”

  “Rick?” I snorted in laughter. “I don’t look at him in that way, trust me.”

  “I need to know all about my competition.”

  “Competition? Rick is my friend, and there’s nothing more to it than that. Yes, he might like me, but he likes many other girls, too. That’s Rick. And he knows he’s not my type.” He nodded slowly. “You are my type. There is no competition,” I added. I also explained about Elias, how he was like a brother to me, and that my love for him was completely platonic.

  “I still don’t want either of them touching you.”

  I smiled at him. “I’m not the only one with admirers, you know. Perhaps I don’t like the way my schoolmates drool over you, too, or how teachers lust over you, even though some of them could be your mothers.”

  Parker shook his head and laughed. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

  I playfully kicked him under the table. A few seconds of silence followed as we sobered. “So, we’ll really give it a shot?”

  “I would never forgive myself if I didn’t try. I managed to resist the attraction between us for a long time, but don’t have the strength to do it anymore.”

  “What if it doesn’t work out?” I was concerned. “You don’t know me.”

  “I know you enough to want you. I know what kind of a person you are. That’s enough for me.”

  I looked down at the table. I wanted to tell him the whole truth about me, but I didn’t allow myself to ruin the moment of happiness. It was selfish of me, I knew that, but I needed this. I wanted to cling to it, and never let it go.

  “We should go.”

  Parker nodded, threw a couple of bills on the table, then wrapped his arm around my shoulders, and walked me to my car. I leaned back on the hood of the car, and turned to face him. I spread my legs a little, so he could step between my thighs. He placed both his hands on my cheeks, and gave me a kiss. Gentle, sensual and slow. When he ended it, I already missed the feel of his lips on mine.

  “Can I see you tomorrow?”

  “I don’t know,” I said honestly.

  “Come over to my house.”

  “I’m working,” I said.

  “Come after work.”

  “I’ll see what I can do.” I really wanted to see him, but I couldn’t just tell my mom I was going over to my teacher’s place. I needed an excuse believable enough so she wouldn’t suspect anything.

  Parker kissed me one more time, before I got into my car. He closed the door after me, and walked to his motorcycle. My heart was dancing with happiness. I truly hoped it would last; but on the other hand, I knew I had to tell him about me, even though it meant I might potentially get my heart broken.

  ~ * ~

  “Mom, I don’t know when I’ll get off work. We’re checking inventory,” I said to my mom as I was getting dressed for work.

  “Inventory? So soon?” she asked.

  “Yes. Mei Li asked us to do it since it’s almost the end of the year.”

  “Huh, how strange. Why couldn’t it be on Monday, when the restaurant is closed?”

  I shrugged, my hands sweating. “I guess it’s easier on the weekends.” I hoped she wouldn’t catch me lying. I desperately wanted to see Parker.

  “Well, she must have her reasons. Have fun, sweetie. I hope it doesn’t take too long.”

  I exhaled in relief. “Me, too. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  At work, I kept checking my watch, gr
inning from ear to ear the whole shift. I couldn’t wait to see Parker again. Even though I finished my shift at eleven p.m., which meant we’d only have an hour to ourselves, I didn’t care. I needed to see him.

  “You’re practically glowing today,” Holly said. “It looks well on you.”

  “Thank you. I’m in a good mood, that’s all.”

  “I bet a guy has something to do with it,” she wiggled her eyebrows.

  “Maybe,” I smiled at her.

  “Who is it?”

  I didn’t have to hide anything from her as she didn’t know Parker, but I still didn’t plan on telling her about him. “Just a guy,” I shrugged.

  “Well, nevertheless, as long as he brings a smile to your face, it’s cool. You look radiant.”

  “Thank you,” I said, pleased.

  When the clock hit eleven o’clock, Holly told me she’d clean up for me, because I had told her earlier I’d be meeting this guy right after work. She said I shouldn’t keep him waiting. We hugged, and I ran to my car.

  The door to Parker’s garage was open when I got there, so I parked the car inside. We didn’t want to bring attention to ourselves or let anyone find out about us.

  When Parker opened the front door, he pulled me inside, and kissed me senselessly. I didn’t mind. I melted with his kisses.

  “Wow, that was one heck of a greeting,” I said breathlessly.

  “I missed you,” he said.

  “I missed you, too.” He still held my hand as he took me to his living room. “Are you hungry? Thirsty?”

  “No, I’m fine.” The only thing I was craving was his kisses.

  “I’m glad you’re here.” He looked me in my eyes, and stuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

  “So am I.”

  King ran out of the bedroom and joined us. I kneeled down, and scratched him behind his ear. He collapsed on the floor in ecstasy.

  “You like that, don’t you? You’re such a good boy.” My gaze fell on Parker’s feet. He was barefoot, and the sight of it was incredibly sexy. I hadn’t thought I would find bare feet hot, but apparently, Parker changed that. My eyes traveled further up to take him all in. He had on grey sweats, riding low on his hips, and a white V-neck T-shirt that hugged his body so perfectly, I actually found myself jealous of a T-shirt. I absentmindedly petted King as I was undressing Parker with my eyes. When he waved a hand in front of my face, I finally raised my gaze to his eyes. His lips were curved, as if he knew what I was thinking. Blood rose to my cheeks, and I looked down before placing my hand in his, so he could pull me to my feet. I caught a whiff of his shampoo. It was strong and manly.

  “How was work?” he asked.

  “Same old.” I didn’t want to discuss my work. We didn’t have a lot of time, so I wanted to spend it with my hands, and lips, on Parker.

  “Was it a busy day?”

  I looked him straight in the eyes. “I don’t want to talk about my work.”

  “Really? Then what would you rather talk about?” He lowered his voice.

  “I don’t want to talk. I had something else in mind.” I bit my lower lip, and looked at him through my eyelashes. “I want to kiss you.”

  “That’s the best thing I’ve heard today,” he said, sounding pleased, and before I could blink, he was kissing me. “Mmm, definitely worth the wait.”

  “No talking,” I mumbled in between kisses.

  “So bossy,” I felt his lips smile against mine.

  After fifteen minutes of an intense make out session on the couch, we were so turned on, we had to slow things down a notch. Parker’s hand moved to my neck where my necklace hung. I didn’t wear it often—not because I didn’t like it, but because it was the last present my dad gave me, and I didn’t want to lose it. Parker took it in his hand, and studied it.

  “My dad bought it for me.”

  “I like it.” He stood up and walked to the kitchen. “Tell me more about your family,” he called out as he opened the cupboard to grab some glasses.

  While he was in the kitchen, I took the opportunity to study his house. It was very clean, everything in its place. The house was small, but very cozy. The kitchen and living room were adjoined, so we didn’t have to yell to hear one another.

  “My family? You already know Tyler is my brother. And my mother, she’s a really great woman. She is the most selfless person in the world. She puts everyone before herself. There’s nothing she wouldn’t do for Tyler or I.” I ran my fingers over the trophies above his fireplace. I read the inscriptions.

  First place, kickboxing state championship, 2008

  First place, kickboxing state championship, 2009

  There were more trophies with second place, and one from the world championship, where he placed third. A bunch of medals also hung above the mantel.

  “Here you go,” he appeared behind my back, and handed me a glass of water.

  “You never told me you were so good at kickboxing.” I remember him telling me his dream job would be to own a martial arts studio, but I thought martial arts was just a hobby for him.

  “That was a long time ago,” Parker said, and took a sip from his glass.

  “Are you still competing?”

  He shook his head. “I busted my knee. It was too risky for me to continue. But I still train.”

  My eyes fell on his flat stomach. So that’s why he looked so in shape. He hid a muscular body underneath his clothes. “Do you miss the competitions?”

  “I used to, but now not that much.”

  “I know what you mean.” And I did. My thoughts still wandered to track and field sometimes, and where I’d be if I still trained. Would I make it to the Olympics? Would I ever become the world champion?

  “Are you talking about track and field?”

  I nodded. It hadn’t escaped me what an attentive listener he was; he even remembered the little details I mentioned in passing.

  “What happened?”

  “Um…” I averted my gaze from the trophies, looked at him, and then I walked to the couch. “Life got in the way. I had a bad experience that threw a bad light on the whole thing. So I simply stopped.”

  He nodded.

  I felt he wanted me to continue, but I still wasn’t willing to give him more, so I changed the topic. “What about your family? I don’t know anything about you.”

  “I’m from Arizona. My parents still live there. My father is an accountant, and my mother works at a library.”

  “Do you have any brothers or sisters?”

  “Yes, a sister and a brother,” he smiled. “They’re both married. I also have two nieces, whom I like to spoil rotten.” He joined me on the couch, and turned me, so he could put my legs across his thighs. I leaned my head on his shoulder.

  “I still can’t wrap my head around the fact we’re really doing this.”

  I felt his hand slide underneath my pant leg. He caressed the skin on my ankle, moved up to my knee, and back to the ankle again. He left a trail of goose bumps in his wake. His touch was gentle and sensual.

  “What about your job? How are we going to work this out? I’m your student, for Christ’s sake. But I can’t go back and pretend you’re nothing more than my teacher.” Every part of my body was craving him. “What if we get caught? I don’t want you to lose your job.”

  “We won’t,” he said, and kissed the top of my head.

  “How can you be so sure?”

  “Don’t worry. Everything’s going to be fine.” Parker turned his body so he was facing me, and gently pushed me back into the cushions. “We’re going to be fine,” he repeated as if he wanted to reassure himself, too, and kissed me.

  A smile played on my lips. “We’re gonna to be fine,” I repeated after him with a nod. His body was above me, and I could feel the hard ridges of his chest and abdomen when he pressed into me. His lips were only a fraction of an inch away, and we stared into each other’s eyes.

  “Kiss me,” I breathed. I couldn’t stand being so close to h
im without his lips on mine.

  “That’s my plan,” he smiled down at me. I closed my eyes, but his kiss didn’t land where I expected it; instead, he kissed my cheek, my jaw, and the length of my neck. His lips devoured me, and I melted underneath him. I bucked my hips up as pleasure shot through my body. His hand slid down my chest, and he brushed his thumb over my nipple. Even though I was dressed, I felt his every touch in my core. I moaned as he repeated the motion. At my moan, he ground his hips into mine, and I could feel how hard he was.

  “You’re so beautiful.” He lifted on his elbows, hovering over me, and looked me straight in the eyes. His were burning with desire, and I could see and feel how much he wanted me. Grabbing him by the nape of his neck, I crushed his lips to mine. I wanted him more than the Sahara desert needed water. The long, passionate, yet sweet kiss, awoke in me a desire I could barely contain. We broke apart, breathing deeply, but Parker wasn’t finished with me yet. He leaned on his elbow, partly on the couch, partly on me, and reached to my neck with his free hand. He slid it down to the neckline of my blouse, where he stopped by the top button. He had such big hands, his fingers still touching me, while he circled his thumb up to my jaw, and tilted my head to the side. His mouth was on my neck the next moment. His tongue explored the delicate skin of my throat, and his hand slid further down to undo the top three buttons of my blouse, so only my bra was exposed to his burning eyes. His hands played with my breasts through the lacy material, and he emitted a moan deep in his throat. I responded by bucking my hips upward. The tension inside me was burning. I’d never felt anything so intense before. It was heavenly, and I didn’t want it to stop.