“I don’t know what to say,” Brooke confessed.
“Neither did I.”
“What did you say?”
“I told her the truth; that you were adopting the kids. After she intimated that Ethan was not actually my son, I left the room.”
“She said that?”
“In so many words—yes, she did.”
Brooke was torn between feeling angry at Mary’s assertion and heartsick for Tess. The latter won. “I’m sorry,” she said softly. “I don’t know how anyone could question that he’s your son.” Brooke giggled. “I could tell he missed you already when we were on the plane. I swear he already has the same pout.”
Tess chuckled. “I don’t pout,” she told Brooke. She sobered. “I keep thinking that something is going to change things; that somehow she’ll accept my life—our life. I don’t know, Brooke. If facing down cancer isn’t enough to do that, I’m not sure that anything can.”
“Well, she just had surgery and I’m sure her mind is racing about everything still to come. Maybe she just needs a little…”
“Don’t say time,” Tess interrupted Brooke. “Time isn’t a guarantee. This isn’t about needing time. I’m not sure what it’s about to tell you the truth. I… Brooke? I just… I don’t want to leave angry—not now. But I don’t know how much more I can take. I can’t change her and I don’t want to change me. Where is there to go?”
I wish I knew. After hearing Tess’s revelation, Brooke was tempted to agree to Tess flying home. She knew Tess would come to regret that. Brooke wasn’t sure what to say to ease Tess’s pain. Something kept telling her that Davey’s presence would help. “I’m sorry,” Brooke said. “I love you, Tess. You’re a great mom. The kids are lucky to have you.”
“They’re lucky to have us,” Tess replied.
“Promise me that you will call me if anything else happens? I know that I can’t fix it—any of it. I can listen. Believe me, I would do anything to make this better for you.”
“I know you would, love. I guess I should get the spare rooms ready.”
“Mom said she and D can stay at a hotel.”
“No,” Tess put the thought to rest.
“Tess, your mom is still recovering and…”
“No. This is a four-bedroom house. My dad would never hear of that anyway and you know it.”
Brooke did know it. Chris Sinclair adored his grandchildren and he thought the world of Brooke’s mother. There was no way he would stand for them staying in a hotel. And, despite Mary’s views on many things, Brooke doubted Tess’s mother would find that idea an acceptable arrangement either. Thinking about it all as her conversation with Tess rolled on, Brooke wondered if perhaps her mother might be of some assistance in the Mary department as well. “I’m sure that’s true.”
“Let me know when they’re coming in and I can pick them up.”
“Mom said she’ll rent a car,” Brooke replied. “It’ll be easier when you all come home.”
True. “You’ll let me know?”
“I’ll send you all the information as soon as I have it settled.”
“Brooke…”
“It will be okay, Tess. Just trust me; okay? Try and get some rest tonight.”
“I miss you,” Tess whispered.
Brooke privately admonished herself for leaving. “I miss you too. Call me if you need me.”
“I will.”
“I hope so.”
“I will,” Tess promised. “I love you.”
“I love you too. Get some sleep.”
“I’ll try. This bed feels awfully big. I’m used to making room for this big green monster I married,” Tess teased, needing some form of levity and normalcy.
“You want me to ship you that lasso of yours?” Brooke bantered.
“I wish.”
Brooke laughed. “Goodnight, Tess.”
“Night, love. I’ll call you in the morning.”
“I’ll be here.”
Tess placed her phone on the bed and rolled over. She grabbed the pillow that Brooke had used the previous night and inhaled deeply. The action transported her to a different time, and she replayed the memory of the first night she had innocently slept beside Brooke. A smile painted her lips. “I miss you, Brooke.”
***
SUNDAY EVENING
Tess had been surprised when Brooke called early in the morning to tell her that Davey and Rebecca would arrive sometime around 5:00 PM. She had thought the pair would make the trip on Monday.
“What are you up to?” Chris asked his daughter.
“Trying to figure out what to feed all of you.”
“I thought we’d order pizza.”
“I don’t mind cooking,” Tess said.
Chris smiled. “Anything to avoid having to sit with your mother?”
Tess sighed heavily. “Dad…”
“She told me about your conversation yesterday.”
Tess nodded. “I can’t argue with her—not now. I don’t have the energy.”
“She just worries.”
Tess was reluctant to continue the conversation. Her father’s inclination would always be to defend her mother. On some level, Tess could understand that. He loved his wife. But there was also a part of Tess that found her father’s lack of support frustrating. It inevitably left her wondering what he thought about her life and her family. Was his verbal kindness only a mask? Deep down did he share her mother’s opinions? She’d come here hoping to support both her parents through a difficult time. Hopeful was the right word. She hoped that perhaps the road ahead would be paved with new understanding and acceptance. Hope did not always translate to reality.
“About me and the kids?” Tess questioned as gently as she could manage.
“She doesn’t want to see any of you hurt, Tess.”
“Well, I don’t want to see any of us hurt either. Funny thing is; it’s her words that have caused the most hurt in our family.”
Chris nodded. “Is that how you feel?”
“Truthfully? I’m sorry, Dad; yes, it is. To suggest that Ethan is not my son? It doesn’t get more hurtful than that.”
“That’s not what she meant.”
“I’d like to believe that,” Tess replied. “That doesn’t matter. You can’t take it back once you say it. She knew that would hurt me; she still chose to express those feelings.”
“She loves you, Tess. I know you don’t think so…”
“I know Mom loves me,” Tess replied. “I love her. If I didn’t, it wouldn’t hurt me so much,” she told him. “Listen,” Tess softened her tone. “I’m going to be here a few more days. Let’s just leave this. We both know how we feel. I think it’s best if we just let it be now.”
Chris watched as Tess turned away from him and began unloading the dishwasher. How do I get them to see?
***
“Brooke?” Dani hovered in the doorway of Ethan’s bedroom.
“Hey, Dani.”
“Aren’t you working?”
“I’m on call at nine tonight,” Brooke said. “Why? Want to get rid of me already?”
Dani laughed. “No. Do I get to babysit?”
Brooke smiled. “You’re in charge when I leave. But you know, Grandpa is here if you need any help.”
“I won’t,” Dani said confidently. “Besides, he gets Ethan’s food everywhere.”
Brooke snickered. True.
“Brooke?”
Brooke forced herself not to laugh. Sometimes, Dani and Davey were so much alike it made her head spin. “Yeah?”
“Is it true?” Dani asked.
“Is what true?”
“Me and Davey heard you tell Gram that Grandma said Ethan’s not our brother.”
Brooke mentally slapped herself. You were not meant to hear that. How did you hear that? “Dani, I don’t know how you heard my conversation with Gram, but Ethan is your brother.”
“Yeah, I know. Why did Grandma say that to Mom?”
Brooke detected
a hint of anger in Dani’s voice. “That’s not exactly what she said,” Brooke tried to smooth things over. “She worries about you guys and your mom.”
“What about you and Ethan?” Dani questioned.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, Gram and Grandpa worry about me and Davey all the time. And, Gram is always nagging Mom to slow down.”
Brooke bit her lip to keep from laughing. Her mother was constantly trying to convince Tess to accept a little more help. She knew that was partly because her mother felt Tess deserved some time for herself and partly because Rebecca Campbell would do anything to get more time with her grandchildren—all of them. Dani’s words brought home the stark contrast between her mother and Mary Sinclair. She’d never considered that the twins had picked up on the difference between the two women. Looking at Dani, Brooke had to admit she shouldn’t be surprised. Dani and Davey weren’t little kids anymore. The older they got, the more easily they put the pieces of any puzzle together. It wasn’t a difficult puzzle to solve. The question Brooke faced now was how to approach it with Dani.
“That’s true,” Brooke replied.
“So why doesn’t Grandma worry about you and Ethan?”
“I’m sure she does, Dani.”
Dani shook her head.
“Dani?”
“It’s mean,” she said.
“Grandma isn’t mean.”
Dani’s brow raised just like Tess’s did at times. Brooke nearly fell over at the sight. Dani seemed to age ten years in front of her eyes. God help us in a few more years. “She loves you.”
Dani shook her head again. She looked over at Ethan in his crib and then back at Brooke. “Davey says if you mess with one of us, you mess with all of us.”
Brooke’s eyes flew open. Maybe I’d better give Tess a head’s up.
The more Dani spoke the more it became evident to Brooke; the twins weren’t only concerned about their mother; they were angry. While they battled at times, Dani and Davey were also fiercely protective of one another. She had always known that protectiveness extended to her and Tess. That sense of guardianship and devotion clearly extended to their little brother.
“I don’t think your grandmother is trying to mess with anyone,” Brooke attempted to calm Dani. She had to bite her lip again when Dani’s brow shot up in response. Oh, my God, she looks just like Tess! “Dani,” Brooke gestured to the hallway. “Why don’t we go downstairs and talk about this.”
“Why can’t Grandma just be happy?” Dani asked without moving.
“I don’t know. Maybe your grandmother has been sad for so long she forgot how to be happy.” As Brooke voiced her thought, she realized the truth in the words. Maybe that was exactly the problem. “Come on, let’s go downstairs and raid the cookies Mom made before she left.”
Dani started to follow Brooke down the stairs. “Brooke?”
“Yeah?”
“I’ll take care of Ethan.”
Brooke smiled. “I know you will, Dani.”
***
Davey wandered into the living room wearing his bathing suit. Mary smiled when she caught sight of him. “Can I guess where you are off to?”
“Grandpa said I could go for a swim if it was okay with Mom.”
“Ahh, the real reason you wanted to come visit,” Mary guessed.
Davey sat down on a chair across from her. He considered his grandmother for a moment, studying her expression thoughtfully. “Nah,” he dismissed her notion.
“Your mother tells me you are missing a big baseball game.”
“It’s no big deal. I have one every week.”
“It sounded like a big deal. She was surprised you wanted to miss it.”
Davey shrugged.
“I thought you loved baseball.”
“I love Mom more.”
Tess stopped cold just as she was about to enter the room. Did Davey just say that?
Mary was genuinely surprised at her grandson’s reply. “I don’t doubt that,” she said.
“Can I ask you something?” Davey looked at her.
Mary expected Davey to ask about her surgery or something to do with the reason for his mother’s visit. “Sure, you can.”
“How come you don’t like Brooke?”
Mary was taken aback. “I like Brooke.”
Davey frowned. “How come you always say stuff about Mom and Brooke?”
“Davey, I’m not sure I know what you mean.”
“You thought Brooke would leave us.”
Mary sighed. “I worry about you. You weren’t very old when your mom’s friend moved out, but you were very upset by that.”
“Jackie was Mom’s girlfriend,” he said as a matter of fact.
Mary nodded.
“How come you think Ethan’s not my little brother?” he asked.
Mary was shocked. “Davey, I…”
Tess struggled with whether to intervene or let the conversation a few yards away continue. Davey’s voice had an edge to it, but to Tess, he sounded more curious than he did angry. She took a deep breath and decided to wait another minute.
“Ethan’s my brother.”
“Yes, I know,” Mary said.
“How come you don’t think so?” he asked again.
“I know he is your brother.”
Tess listened intently, surprised by her mother’s answer.
“You still think Brooke’s gonna leave,” he surmised.
Mary sighed. “I think, Davey that sometimes things happen. I want you and your sister to be safe and happy.”
“Brooke says that you can’t worry all the time about what might happen.”
“Maybe not, but…”
“She says that being afraid is okay as long as you don’t give up.”
“It isn’t always about being afraid,” Mary said.
Davey shook his head. “That’s not what Tad says or Grandpa C.”
“Tad?”
“Yeah. He’s Brooke and Grandpa’s friend. He helps me with me pitching and I get to help at his camp every summer.”
“I see.”
Davey met his grandmother’s curious gaze and continued. “Tad says that being afraid just tells you that something matters. If you’re afraid to lose it or mess it up, it’s ‘cause it means something to you. That probably means you ought to keep at it.”
Mary listened without comment. In the distance, Tess found herself amazed by the words Davey was speaking.
“Grandpa says kinda’ the same thing. He says no one knows what’s going to happen the next second.”
“That’s true,” Mary commented. “That’s why we worry about you, and why we want to make sure you’re safe.”
“Yeah, but Grandpa says worrying never stops the bad stuff from happening anyway.”
Tess closed her eyes. That’s the truth if ever I heard it.
Davey gave another customary shrug before continuing. “He says that the best thing to do when you’re afraid is to ask yourself why. Like, I was afraid to try pitching in a game.”
“That’s not quite the same,” Mary offered. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”
Davey wrinkled his nose. “That’s why I was afraid to pitch in the game,” he said. “Some of the kids are really big. Last year, this kid, Gordon? He took a line drive right in the face! Broke his nose and everything,” Davey explained. “Brooke was there, though. She knew what to do.”
“That’s not quite the kind of hurt I was talking about.”
Davey kept going. “Brooke and Mom always know what to do.”
Tess chuckled softly. If only that were true.
“I might get hit,” Davey said. “Even Tad said so. I might not, though. I just practice harder to get my glove up quick.”
“Davey, life isn’t like baseball.”
“Tad says it is. He says sometimes things come at you so fast they knock you right over. And, you might not wanna get up but. That’s when you gotta get up.” Davey smiled. “I used to worry Brooke woul
d leave too.”
“You did?” Mary asked.
“Sure. When I talked to her, Brooke understood.”
Tess covered her mouth. Brooke always told Tess the important parts of her conversations with the twins. She never divulged all the details, and Tess appreciated that. Davey and Dani needed to know that they could trust Brooke. Listening to Davey, Tess had no doubt that her children trusted Brooke completely.
“Did she?” Mary asked.
“Sure. She said she remembered when she moved away from Grandpa. She thought he might not wanna see her anymore. But he did.” He smiled. “Brooke will always wanna be with us,” he said assuredly. “She’s our mom.”
Mary nodded. “I can see how much you love her.”
Tess took a step closer, desiring to see Davey’s reaction. He tended to squirm at the mention of the word, love. She couldn’t see him from her vantage point. She could see her mother.
“She’s my mom,” he said. “Like Mom but different. So, how come you don’t think so?” he wondered.
“I think Brooke cares a great deal about all of you,” Mary said honestly.
“Then how come you make Mom cry so much?”
Mary’s crestfallen expression nearly stopped Tess’s heart.
“What do you mean?” Mary asked her grandson.
“Mom was crying yesterday ‘cause she was upset. I could tell.”
“I don’t know why your mom was upset.”
“I do. ‘Cause you don’t think Ethan is our brother.”
“Davey…”
Davey shrugged. “He is. Mom shouldn’t cry,” he said.
Mary was moved by Davey’s obvious affection for Tess.
“She takes care of everybody all the time—me and Dani and Ethan, and Brooke and Murphy too,” Davey said. “Mom takes care of everybody.”
“Your mom loves you all,” Mary said. “She’s always been that way—always tried to take care of everybody,” Mary said affectionately. “I think she was born that way. Seems you are quite a bit like her.”
Davey smiled proudly.
“Davey,” Mary began. “Why did you want to come down here?”
“Mom came to take care of you and Grandpa. Somebody needs to take care of Mom. Brooke has to work. Dani can help take care of Ethan while I’m here. ‘Cause Grandpa makes a mess when he feeds him,” Davey explained. “But he’s pretty good with the poop.”
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