by D. S. Murphy
“If I can’t beat one human, even one with magical abilities, how will I be any use in actual combat?” I grabbed a towel from the nearby wooden fence and wiped the sweat off my neck, before taking a long drink of water.
“Are you kidding? You’d kick ass in any normal fight. Especially if you’re using that sword of yours. Even without the salt water, you land a third of your punches. With the sword, you’d only need on good thrust to take me out.”
“But I won’t be fighting normal humans. It’ll either be Tuatha Dé or merrow. I could move the stones at Temhair Falach because they had so much merrow blood on them, but I’m only half as fast as a normal merrow. I’m no match for Sebastian and he isn’t even fully trained.”
“So don’t fight. Sebastian thinks you’re the only chance at peace, as a ruler, right? If the Tuatha Dé want to avoid a war, they’ll have to protect you.”
“Do they really want peace though? I got the feeling not all of them were enthusiastic about making a deal with the merrow.”
“You offered them more blood for peace than they’ve been able to get in a thousand years of war. The merrow can simply disappear, retreat into the ocean. With peace, as long as it’s maintained, they’ll get fresh merrow blood, delivered to each of the families in equal measure. With no fighting or risk. It was a good plan, I’m pretty sure most of them are on board.”
“Except for whoever attacked me earlier, if it was even Tuatha Dé. I don’t know anymore. Still, I’d feel better if I had more resources. What if I got my own tattoo?”
“Are you serious? A merrow blood tattoo… on a merrow?”
“I’m probably more Tuatha Dé than merrow. Why shouldn’t I have a tattoo?”
“Well for starters, it would probably make the other families nervous. They still see you as mostly an outsider, even an enemy. But more importantly, we barely have any blood as it is.”
“What if I could get more blood? Enough for my own tattoo at least, and maybe to refill yours as well.”
Ethan stood still and appraised me critically. His warm brown eyes reflected the tall fir trees surrounding us. He stroked his chin and I noticed he hadn’t shaved for several days.
“First of all, I’m going to assume that’s purely hypothetical. Because if you did have some merrow blood lying around, other than your own of course, which I don’t think would work anyway, it’s not something we should be talking about. I think we’ve convinced most of the Tuatha Dé to wait and see whether your offer pans out, but if they knew you had a store of blood somewhere, they might feel entitled to it. Secondly, tattoos are usually given in a special coming of age ceremony. I got my first when I was twelve. I’m not sure whether my grandmother or anybody else with the necessary skillset would agree to tattoo a merrow. A merrow princess, no less. It just seems… crazy.”
I didn’t push the issue, but it was enough to plant the seed. Maybe I’d ask Morgan about it later. Ethan gave me a ride home after practice. The first few days, I healed my cuts and bruises with sea water. Aedan filled a couple buckets on the way home and I added them to my bath. But as the weeks passed, I stopped using it. I needed the bruises, the pain. They kept my mind off Sebastian. The merrow hadn’t attacked Portballintrae yet, so he must have made it home. Maybe his plan worked, maybe he convinced his father to wait. But if so, why hadn’t he returned? Had he changed his mind about me? Had his father convinced him to side with the merrow? Was I just a land fling before he accepted his duties? Was everything we had a lie? I admit, in my weaker moments, I had doubts. But if not that, it meant something was wrong. Some afternoons I swam by myself, but the ocean was large and unwelcoming without Sebastian. And moving around was so slow. The salt water increased my energy, so I could keep swimming without getting winded, but it took too long to get anywhere. And I was still terrified of getting too close to the drop-off; afraid that massive black hole would suck me down to oblivion. I felt so helpless, waiting for Sebastian and imagining the worst.
Some nights I drove over to the Runkerry house just to feel closer to him. I found a T-shirt that still carried his scent, and sat in the loveseat listening to the sound of the ocean and watching the roses fade. After the second week I noticed that all the roses were turning brown except one—there was a plastic rose in the vase that kept its vibrant color. It was a cute trick. I wondered if the conch shell was something similar; a practical joke to give me temporary comfort, the illusion of hope or action, when actually Sebastian was too far away for me to reach him. It might have been funny, if he’d returned. He’d smile and tease me, and I’d melt into him. I tried to tell myself that he’d just been held up. But two weeks turned into three, then four. And he still didn’t return.
I don’t know why I even bothered going to school anymore. Maybe it helped me feel normal. Maybe the noise of lessons and classes helped drown out my internal monologue, which was beginning to obsess about my future—a future alone, without Sebastian. My grades were steadily dropping, but I didn’t care. Was university even a possibility for me? For anybody? I didn’t know.
One day Mr. Sadleir held me up after class and asked if anything was wrong at home. I didn’t notice I had a purple bruise under my eye and scratches on my face until I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror. I’d been rolling out of bed in the morning and getting ready without even checking my appearance. Some days I didn’t even shower, and smelled like sweat and dirt from sparring with Ethan the night before. I’d have to be more careful. I may not have cared what people thought of me, but I didn’t want to get Aedan in trouble for showing up at school with bruises.
At lunch I grabbed a salt shaker and sprinkled some grains into my palm. I mixed it with a little water and patted the liquid around my eyes. That should lessen the bruising at least. I told Jackie and the others that Sebastian had to go back to Iceland for a few weeks, which explained his absence but not my moping. The first few weeks I’d kept up the appearance of normality, expecting him to return soon. I was excited even, thinking about how I would welcome him back. But after a month and a half without Sebastian, I just couldn’t find the will to smile.
I’d been driving to school with Sebastian’s classic Austin. Most days I picked up Derry and Jackie so they didn’t have to ride the bus. I dropped them off after school, but then headed to Ethan’s for more training. Recently he’d been making me practice with the Baetulia, trying to move things around like he did while fighting, but it was too hard to do both at once. I couldn’t throw punches or duck when I was also trying to grab an object and throw it in a specific direction with my mind. I still didn’t understand exactly how the Baetulia worked, either. It was a little similar to my relationship with water. I could feel the water molecules and influence their direction. With the Baetulia, I could also feel most metal, trace elements or merrow blood—that’s how I was able to move the stones. Ethan said almost everything had traces of mineral content, so lifting them was a matter of weight and force. He could lift leaves easily, even though they had a small amount of minerals, but couldn’t lift a rock; unless a drop of merrow blood gave him a concentrated patch of minerals to focus on. But he could also temporary boost his abilities by igniting the energy stored in his tattoos. So it kind of pissed me off that he wasn’t going to let me get one. I swung at him wildly and he deflected, sending me sprawling for the third time in a row.
“That’s enough for today,” he said. The humor had gone out of his eyes and he seemed frustrated with me.
“One more time,” I said, standing up again.
“Your head’s not in it today,” he said. “I don’t enjoy hurting you, so if you’re not going to block or duck this is a waste of time. You should go home and clean up. We’ll try again tomorrow.”
I didn’t notice the text message from Aedan until I grabbed my jacket.
Come home. Bring Ethan. Text when you’re on your way.
I showed Ethan the message.
“What do you think it means?”
“I think it
means he wants you to come home.”
“But it’s weird, right? What if it’s a trap or something? What if he’s in danger?”
“If it is was a trap, I doubt they’d want me there,” he smirked. “Better to get you alone, right? So he probably just wants to talk about something. We don’t I drive? You can pick up the car tomorrow after school.”
I nodded. Ethan was probably right, but there was still a knot of worry in my stomach after Aedan’s cryptic message. I realized I’d barely spoken to him in the last few weeks. I usually just retreated into my room and passed out. In the morning he was often gone before I even woke up. Sometimes he’d go fishing, or just down to the diner for a cup of coffee before starting a job.
When we pulled up to the house, it was dark and silent. All the lights were off and I felt the hair on my arms stand on end. Something was wrong. I thought I saw a curtain flutter in the window. Was someone inside? Ethan stayed close behind me as I walked up to the front door. It was unlocked, so I opened it slowly, my heart pounding in my ears.
I flinched when someone switched on the lights. I was momentarily blinded and could only see silhouettes—dark shadows crowding Aedan’s living room. But I could still hear them as they all shouted in unison.
“Surprise!”
***
“Happy St. Patrick’s Day!” Jackie said, putting an oversized green top hat on my head and giving me a hug. She smiled at Ethan and I glanced back at him.
“You knew about this?” I asked. He held his hands up defensively and grinned.
“It was Jackie’s idea. But a good one.”
Then he leaned in closer and whispered, “You’ve been pushing yourself too hard. Your friends are worried about you. Take a night off, have some fun. Try to enjoy yourself.”
Jackie grabbed my hand and led me inside. Patricia and Kyle were on the couch, surrounded by Tristan, Megan, Declan, Kiara and Kaitlyn, sitting on an odd assortment of stools and chairs. Derry was at the kitchen table with Aedan, and I caught a glimpse of Helena in the kitchen stirring a pot of something that smelled delicious. Almost everyone was wearing green clothes and accessories—the abundance of shamrocks and four leaf clover decorations was dizzying. It was the fullest I’d ever seen Aedan’s house. Jackie handed me a glass of cider after I’d greeted everyone.
Derry thought I needed to learn all about the history of St. Patrick’s day so he launched into one of his presentations. I did find it interesting though. Apparently St. Patrick used the shamrock to explain theology to the pagans, and converted the whole island. Then we played drinking games for a while. I was terrible so I quit and sat on the couch between Kiara and Kaitlyn.
“Where’s Sebastian?” Kiara asked. “Isn’t he coming?”
“He’s out of town for a few weeks,” I answered. “Should be back pretty soon though.”
“Ah, that’s too bad. Long distance relationships are hard. Do you keep in touch? On Facebook or something?”
“Yeah, um… it’s complicated. He’s helping his father with some things, family stuff. I’m not sure when he’ll be able to return.”
“Poor you,” Kaitlyn said.
“Excuse me.” I stood up suddenly. “Bathroom.”
I hid in the bathroom for a few minutes, until I was sure my emotions were under control. I wiped my eyes and pinched my cheeks, which were pale and thin. I hadn’t noticed it before, but I’d probably been eating less than usual. No wonder my friends were worried about me. The benefit of hanging out with Ethan was that I didn’t have to lie all the time. He and Aedan were the only people who knew what was really going on with me. Repeating the lie I’d told Jackie, Patricia and Derry was difficult. And deep down, I was terrified Sebastian was never coming back. But I couldn’t show it. It would only lead to more questions. So I had to keep it together.
I got through another hour of the party. Luckily, with so many people I didn’t have to talk much. I could just listen to the music, sip my drink and smile whenever Tristan said something funny and everyone else was laughing.
I thought I did a pretty good job of pretending to enjoy myself. It was a school night, so most of the other kids headed home by eleven. After that it was more cozy. Helena had to work in the morning, so Aedan walked her out while Derry, Kyle and Patricia used my laptop to stream music videos. Jackie and I were sitting together on the couch, and Ethan had gone outside for a cigarette.
“I’m sorry about the girls grilling you earlier,” Jackie said. “We should have told them that Sebastian was away.”
“It’s not a big deal,” I said. “I just miss him.”
“But he is coming back, right? It’s just, you seem really upset lately. Depressed even. If something happened with Sebastian, you can tell us about it. Or anything else that’s bothering you. We’re all here for you.”
I wanted so badly to tell her the truth. That mermaids were plotting to wipe out the human race, and I’d just made a deal with an ancient family of witches—peace in exchange for magical blood. Sebastian went back to stall his father but should have been back weeks ago. Oh, and I’m a freaking mermaid princess. But I couldn’t tell her anything. Even if I could get her to believe me, she’d want to help, as would the others. Maybe even fight. And then they’d die. Jackie’s craving to save everybody. Derry’s humor and geeking out on history. Patricia’s enthusiasm and passion. They were everything about the world I wanted to save. I wanted them to stay just the way they were. Which meant, I needed to get better at lying.
“I’m fine, really.” I smiled to reassure her.
She didn’t look convinced. For a minute I thought she was going to say something else. Her face looked confused, and then shocked. She reached up and touched her throat like she couldn’t breathe, and her eyes went wide just before she fell off her chair and collapsed on the ground, convulsing.
“Jackie!” I shouted, kneeling over her. She couldn’t hear me.
“Ethan! Aedan—help!”
The others came running and saw Jackie on the floor.
“Is she choking on something?” Aedan said. “Check her windpipe.”
“She’s still breathing through her nose,” Ethan said. “This is something else.”
Jackie’s eyes had rolled to the back of her head and white foam was coming out of her mouth.
“Has this ever happened before?” Ethan asked Derry and Patricia. “Epilepsy maybe?” They shook their heads. Jackie had stopped writhing and was now lying perfectly still, her face shining, hair sticking to her forehead.
“Do something!” I shouted at Ethan.
“There’s nothing I can do,” he said. “Our powers don’t work like that.”
But mine do. I remembered the story Morgan had told me about my mother and how she’d tried to save Colin. Then I grabbed a knife from the kitchen and opened up my wrist. I didn’t care who saw. I didn’t care if they were horrified. I couldn’t let Jackie die.
44
The last three hours were a blur. Derry called an ambulance while Aedan tried to clean the blood off Jackie’s face. My blood. At least I’d managed to get some of it in her mouth. Ethan grabbed two dishtowels and wrapped them tightly around my wrists to stop the bleeding. Then he pushed me out of the house towards the coast, which was a five minute walk away. I didn’t want to leave Jackie, but Aedan said I’d done all I could. It was up to her now. Derry and Patricia watched the rest of us like we’d gone crazy.
At the coast, Ethan made me dunk my arms under the water. As the freezing water fizzed and sparkled against my skin I felt a deep, biting pain where I’d cut myself, but then it faded. Ethan was uncharacteristically quiet. I was waiting for the lecture, but he just stood there, gazing at the ocean.
“Aren’t you going to tell me how reckless that was?” I asked finally.
“You did what you thought was right,” he shrugged. “And you probably saved Jackie’s life. How could I object to that? What you did back there… it was brave.”
“I doubt Patricia or Derry
will think so. They were already barely convinced I wasn’t batshit crazy. Now I’ve proven that I’m unstable.”
“They may surprise you. But let’s focus on what’s important first.”
“Which is?”
“Well, for one, I’m pretty sure Jackie doesn’t have many enemies. Not ones that want to kill her, anyway.”
“So they were after me. Again.”
“Right, but who? I really didn’t think the Tuatha Dé would go after you again, after Morgan vouched for you, and after agreeing to your peace treaty. It’s basically an act of war—they’re not just challenging you, they’re challenging the Blake family name. Which means they think we’re weak enough to take out, or at least disobey.”
“Great, so my peace treaty with the Tuatha Dé is worthless. Meanwhile Sebastian has disappeared and as far as we know, the merrow are still planning to wipe out the human race. I thought, by not telling anyone else, we were protecting them. But they hurt Jackie. They could have killed her. Sebastian warned me about the Tuatha Dé, he said you were bloodthirsty murderers, and I saw what they did to Trevor. But I still thought… I don’t know, I thought they’d be reasonable.”
“It just doesn’t make any sense. I don’t know why they’d try do anything like this.”
“Somebody obviously isn’t following marching orders. But who could it be, if not the Tuatha Dé?”
“They are not the only enemies of the merrow.”
“Great, there are more people who want to kill me?”
“There was a group, an ancient group. But they went underground centuries ago. They don’t live in the open. They are secretive, clandestine.”
“Morgan told me about them. They sound a lot like the Tuatha Dé.”