by Marni Mann
“Frankie…” he said through the speaker of the phone. There was relief in his voice.
I looked down at my glass, surprised that I’d barely touched it. “Hi.”
“Where are you?”
“Home. I went out for a run and just got back.”
“Did it help?”
I took a sip, holding the wine in my mouth before swallowing. The back of my throat turned warm and tingly. “No. Not at all. My questions are starting to have questions.”
“I want to fix that.”
“Are you sure you can?” I moved to the living room windows and rested my forehead against the glass. The street was so busy below, but I wasn’t paying attention to the cars that passed or the pedestrians on the sidewalk. My mind was on Taylor and how I’d unexpectedly run into her at Derek’s townhouse. She was stirring up something, and it somehow involved Derek and Randy, and a last name that wasn’t Block.
“If you’ll give me a chance, I’d like to try.” It was more sincere than he’d ever sounded.
“Come over then,” I said.
“I’ll be there in fifteen.”
We hung up and I pushed myself off the window, carrying the wine into the bathroom. I set the glass on one of the shampoo niches inside the shower and dropped my clothes on the bath mat. I didn’t even let the water warm before stepping underneath the overhead stream. The side jets massaged my hips and thighs while the steam worked to loosen the rest of me.
I knew there would be answers coming soon, and the thought of it knotted my chest. Those answers were the final pieces—the last things that were separating us. But what if once the truth was known, we realized we couldn’t make it work? What if we were too different after all? I had learned that knowing the truth could change people, could affect them in different ways. Once explored, other feelings would have the opportunity to surface, especially when he finally shared whatever part of his life he’d been blocking from me. There was a reason he hadn’t told me during our weekend in Portsmouth. I could only imagine what that reason was, and in my contemplation, it wasn’t good.
I let the conditioner sit and took a sip of my wine. This was the first time I’d ever taken a drink into the shower. It felt appropriate, given everything that had gone down tonight. In fact, the tension inside me could have used something even stronger. The soapy sponge I was now rubbing over my body wasn’t helping. The only way I would get some relief was if there were strong hands kneading inside the grooves between my muscles, the pockets between my joints.
Hands like Derek’s.
It didn’t matter what happened between us, what was said or what wasn’t. My attraction to him hadn’t faltered. He was the man I wanted to be with.
The one I was falling in love with.
My chest began to tighten even more as those words echoed in my thoughts. As difficult as it was to say “love,” I felt it in every part of me, and I knew I needed to tell him that tonight, to share my feelings once and for all. I also knew I had to end all communication with Reed. I had to explain to him that nothing would ever happen between us again. That meant ending things professionally, too. My father would never understand this decision, but this wasn’t about him or what he expected from me. This was about what I needed.
Finally clean, I grabbed my wine and a towel and stepped out of the shower. I covered my face and body with lotion and squeezed out the water from my hair. My cheeks were still red from my run; my lashes looked dull without mascara, and my hair hung flat…I wasn’t going to do anything about it. I dressed in a pair of yoga pants and a tank top—no bra, no panties. I didn’t even bother putting on perfume.
Reed got the painted Frankie, the one who always hid something behind her image.
Derek was about to get the real me.
I flipped off my bedroom light, and as I rounded the corner of the hallway, I heard a noise. It came from the living room and sounded like rubber-soled boots squeaking over my hardwood floors. That could only mean one thing…I’d forgotten I had put him on the list, and he could come up to my condo whenever he wanted without the doorman notifying me. He also had the new code to get through my front door.
And he had.
His broad frame filled the entire corner of my couch. His green flannel strained against the hardness of his chest; his dark jeans wrapped tightly around the heavy muscles in his thighs. And those hands I had thought about in the shower rested on the cushions. It had only been a few hours since I’d last seen him. It felt like more…because as I stared at him, I was reminded of the distance between us. Of the truth he’d chosen not to share with me.
Of the lies he’d told me instead.
He ran a hand over his beard, brushing the thick, bushy sides through his fingers. “I have a lot to tell you.”
THREE.
DEREK
I WATCHED HER MOVE across the room, her tits bouncing with each step, her black pants hugging those delicious thighs. She wasn’t wearing a bra, and goddamn, did I approve. I was doing everything I could to keep my eyes off her rock hard nipples. I wanted to lick them, to gnaw them until she cried out…but that wasn’t why I was there.
Tonight was for the truth.
“Beer?” she asked.
“Yeah. Please.” When she passed, I smelled her shampoo, the amber that wafted from her skin…skin I wanted naked and submissive beneath me.
Fuck.
I closed my eyes and rested my head on the cushion behind me. I needed a plan—a direction, a starting point for this conversation. Something that owned up to the lying but told her there were reasons for it. I knew it all had to come out and, like it or not, she needed to hear it.
“Here,” she whispered. I opened my eyes and took the beer, the cold glass slipping in my sweaty palms. “There are plenty more if you need them.” She sat on the chair across from me, crossing her legs and holding the wine in her lap.
“I know you must have a million questions,” I said. “There’s a lot I need to tell you first. I don’t know where to start.”
“How about at the beginning?”
The beginning.
“Okay.” I took a deep breath. “When I was young, I worked with my dad as much as my school schedule would allow. He was a foreman, but he was often a floater, filling in wherever and whenever he was needed. He worked for Randy White, the owner of White Construction, as you now know.” The bottle balanced between my two fingers as I brought it up to my lips. I wished this wasn’t so fucking hard. I wished I could fast forward to the part where I was apologizing for not telling her my real name and skip all these ugly details. So many years later and they still shook the hell out of me. “Randy is my father’s brother…my uncle. He runs things differently with his company than I do with mine, differently than most in the industry. He doesn’t give a shit about safety or protocol or his crew. He only cares about money. And because he refuses to spend any on equipment designed to keep his crew safe, there have been accidents. One involved my father…”
Her hand moved to her heart. She shook her head, so much emotion on her face. “My God, Derek.”
“I was there. I saw the whole thing. That was how I lost him.”
Her eyes began to fill, which made it even harder. I didn’t want her to feel sorry for me. Losing my father had changed everything—my plan; my path. My life. It hardened me; it made me lose trust. But I survived, just like she had when she’d lost her mother. The only difference was that after my loss came my dedication to revenge. It was a layer she hadn’t ever experienced.
“Randy wasn’t prosecuted for the accident.” Just saying that made a wave of anger burst through me. Motherfucker. “But Hayden and I weren’t going to let him get away with it so we came up with a plan to take him down. Our family wasn’t the only one affected; there are others, and she’s building a case against him.”
She uncrossed her legs and leaned forward. “Is that why Randy hired Taylor? Because he has a feeling you’re onto him?”
I nodded. �
��He dug around trying to find something from my past he could use, and Taylor just happened to be desperate for cash. He must have thought I would still get hard over my ex. The bastard guessed wrong…and he obviously didn’t know how serious things are between us.” I waited for her reaction. She didn’t give me the smile I was hoping for. “Randy’s been onto me for a while but hasn’t been able to figure out my plan. Hayden’s been careful; I’ve been careful. He won’t know what’s coming until the police show up at his door.”
“But what does this mean for you?”
“When he goes to court, I’ll have to testify about what I witnessed that day. It will be the second time I gave that statement. Maybe this time the people listening won’t be fooled like the last ones were. Then Randy will get what’s coming to him.”
Her gunmetal eyes told me she was still processing it all. “I understand now why it would be so hard to share that part of your past.”
She understood, but I could tell she wasn’t ready for me to touch her, or for me to move beyond this chair. So while I waited for her to come up with the questions she wanted to ask, I came up with a few of my own. “How did you get that paperwork on Taylor?”
“I overheard her on the phone in the bathroom at Blu. I didn’t like what she was saying, so I sent her information to Brea and asked her to do some research. What you saw is the information Brea got on her.” I hadn’t pegged Brea as someone who had connections. That made me like her even more.
“I thought for sure it was Reed,” I said. “Even after you told me it wasn’t.”
“I know.”
“While I was looking through all of Taylor’s paperwork, Reed called and told me about your name not being…your name. He’s been calling and texting incessantly. It makes me think he’s been trying to tell me for a while, but I wouldn’t give him the chance.”
I drained the rest of my beer and set the empty bottle on the coffee table. I really didn’t want her involved in the shit between Reed and me. But tonight was about the truth, and she deserved all of it. “He’s been texting me, too.”
“What?” She looked up from her glass. “How did he get your number?”
“I don’t know. One of his texts mentioned White, so I knew he had figured it out, at least on some level. He spewed a bunch of bullshit that just got me worked up and…” Game on. Another motherfucker. “Frankie, I…” The expression on her face worried me for the second time tonight. I wanted her to smile again. I wanted to know that we could get past this. But I knew what I was about to tell her wasn’t going to make that happen. “I—”
“Where’s my phone?” She reached behind her and felt around on both sides of the chair.
“It’s in the kitchen. I saw it when I came in.”
She stood. “I can only imagine how vile his texts were. I’ve had it with him…I’m tired of his shit. I’m going to make sure you never hear from him again.”
“No.” My voice stopped her from taking another step. She was so fucking sexy when she was angry. If it were any other situation, I would bend her over that chair and make her ass milk my cock. “Sit back down.” She fell into the chair again. “I love that you want to help me, but I assure you, I’ll handle Reed when the time is right.”
“I’m going to handle him first.”
“No, you’re not.”
She sat straighter, and I couldn’t help but smile. “Yes I am, Derek. It’s been a long time coming, and he needs some closure. If I’m being honest, I could probably use some myself. He’s frustrated with me, and he’s taking it out on you.”
“If that’s what you think you need, then maybe it would be good for you guys to talk.” What the hell did I just tell her? It wasn’t like me to encourage the only woman I’d cared about in years to go spend time with her ex, who was also one of the biggest dickheads I’d come across. But if that’s what she needed to heal, I wouldn’t stop her. She needed closure as much as I did.
There was another issue to discuss. “About my name, Frankie…it’s something I should have told you. But telling you the truth meant I’d also have to tell you about Randy and my family, and I wasn’t ready for that.”
“Then tell me now.”
I took a deep breath and looked at the empty bottle of beer. I didn’t need another one. Beer wasn’t going to help with what I needed to say. “My uncle has a reputation in Portsmouth. He’s earning one in Boston, too, and neither of them are good. We’re in the same industry; we compete against each other. I didn’t want my name associated with his in any way even if that meant giving up my father’s last name. For that reason alone, it was a hard decision to make, but in the end it was the right one. When I turned eighteen, I changed White to Block. There are old timers in Portsmouth who have been around long enough to know Randy and I are related. They also know my work speaks for itself. The people in Boston have no reason to dig up my past like Reed, so I came to the city with a clean slate. I’m completely separate from him. That’s all I ever wanted.” She said nothing. “Block or White, it doesn’t matter, Frankie, because I’m still the same person. The man you met when you first walked into my office at Timber Towers, the man who brought you to Portsmouth, the man who has been inside your tight little pussy; we’re all the same. It’s all me.”
Seconds passed before her eyes finally softened. “I believe that.”
“Then you have to believe I didn’t withhold this to intentionally hurt you because that couldn’t be further from the truth. I would never want to hurt you, baby. I care so much about you…” I stopped as her phone vibrated on the counter.
“Is that mine?” she asked, looking toward the kitchen.
“Yes, it’s yours.” I checked the time; it was almost midnight. “It’s a little late for a business call, isn’t it?”
“I don’t think it’s business.”
She ran to the counter and answered it. “Hello?” She turned to face me. “Yes, this is Frankie.” The color slowly started to drain from her cheeks, and her eyes filled. “Oh my God.” I rushed over, wrapping my arms around her waist to pull her closer. “Yes. Okay.” Her entire body was shaking. I squeezed tighter, holding her against my chest, trying to make her still. “Okay. Thank you. Bye.” The phone dropped from her hand and her head seemed to follow it.
“Frankie.” I leaned back so I could see her face. It was the only way I would know how to fix this. “Look at me.”
She gradually lifted her head, tears streaming down both cheeks. Her bottom lip quivered. Her chest rose and fell, unable to catch her breath. I cupped her face and moved in as close as I could get her. “Tell me.”
“It’s Anna.” Tears dripped over my fingers. Her lids squeezed shut and she shook her head as though she didn’t believe the thoughts inside it. “She’s in the hospital.”
“Is she okay?”
“I don’t think so.” Her voice was so fucking pained. “The nurse said when she was admitted, she was in a crippling amount of pain. The doctor is trying to manage it and make her as comfortable as possible.” I could feel her trembling in my hands. “She’s in the ICU, Derek, in critical condition.”
“Do they know what’s causing it?”
She nodded, and I felt her unravel even more. “Cancer.” It was the same thing that took her mother. I pulled her against me, wrapping my arms around her head and tucking my face into her neck. “I didn’t know…she didn’t tell me. It doesn’t sound good, Derek. Not good at all. I need her. I can’t lose her. I can’t…”
Her purse was on the counter right next to me. I tossed it over my shoulder and gently led her toward the elevator. While we rode down each floor, I kept her pressed against my side, my arm curved around her body so I could bear most of her weight. I angled my face so my beard rested on her forehead, allowing her to feel something familiar, to know I was there with her.
That level of pain she was feeling, I knew it too well. Every stab that continuously gutted her over and over…I could still feel the sharpness of that lon
g fucking knife. I wanted to take it away, every tear, every unbearable ache, and hold it inside me so she wouldn’t have to feel it.
I wanted to heal my pink ivory.
“Where are we going?” she asked as we walked out of the lobby door. She shivered even though the air wasn’t cool.
“I’m taking you to the hospital, you need to be with Anna.” She began to cry even harder, my words obviously making the situation more real.
As I lifted her onto the passenger seat of my Suburban, I saw the hardness of her nipples, the bouncing of those perfect tits. She was braless and I hadn’t grabbed anything for her to cover up.
She grabbed my collar as I turned, stopping me from closing the door. “Don’t leave me.” Her voice was so small.
“I’m just going to the trunk. I think I have a flannel back there that you can wear. I’m not leaving you.”
She looked down at her chest and back up at me, her eyes telling me she barely registered what little she had on. “But Anna is.” She was curled in so tightly, her body was lost in the seat.
“You don’t know that, Frankie.”
“She’s like a mother to me…” Those gunmetal eyes were so wide and lost. “The only mother I’ve ever really had.”
“We’re going to get through this, baby.”
FOUR.
FRANKIE
“I’M SORRY,” the nurse said, shutting off the tablet and hugging it against her chest, “but it’s way past visiting hours. I can’t let you in.”
We’d made it as far as the door outside the intensive care unit and she was stopping us from going any farther. This was the second time I’d asked her to let me inside and the second time she’d refused. I’d run out of kindness and patience…and words. All I had were thoughts of losing Anna, images of her lying on one of those wide beds, her frail body barely taking up half of it.