I swallowed the last of my lager. "Anyway, it's a free bar. I need to get my fill."
"I hardly think you need to be worrying about getting free drinks," said Emily, "I saw the size of the cheque you gave to the charity."
It had been large, but it was an insignificant amount compared to what I earned in a year, or had in my bank accounts. Anyway, everybody likes a free drink.
I squeezed her hand. "I'll have one more, okay."
"Okay," said Emily, "I'm not trying to be a stick in the mud, but you did promise you'd cut back."
I stood up and grabbed my empty glass. I could have waited for one of the waiters to bring me a drink, but I'd spotted Danny heading for the bar that ran the length of the wall opposite me. I liked waiting for a pint to be poured too — it was more personal than having it brought to the table.
"Do you want another, Andy?" I said, raising my voice. Andy was drinking pints too, but at a much slower rate. The girls were sharing the wine that had been on the table when we arrived.
"Nah, I'm alright, mate. I've got training in the morning," he said with a wink.
"I'll be back soon enough," I said, slapping his back as I passed him. "Putting you boys to shame."
Harry Rickman grabbed my arm as I passed his table, and stood up, throwing the napkin that was still stuffed in his shirt collar onto the table.
"How are you doing, Jack?" he said, ushering me towards a corner, out of earshot of any eavesdroppers.
"I'm great, Harry."
"We've all noticed you seem to have found yourself a lady," said Harry, gesturing at his table, around which sat the three joint club owners and their partners.
"Thanks to you," I said.
Harry looked puzzled. "I don't remember setting up a dating agency, Jack. Why have I been bestowed with the honour of finding you a woman?"
"I met her in London, on the day of my ban and had a… drink with her. I never thought I'd see her again. Imagine my surprise when she turned out to be one of the psychologists you set me up with."
Harry looked genuinely amazed. "Get out of here," he said, "it sounds like a film."
I laughed, glancing over at Andy. "You're not the first one to say that," I said.
Harry straightened his pocket square. "I wish you both all the luck in the world," he said, placing his hand on my shoulder. "I mean that, but listen, Jack. The reason I dragged you aside is that I've seen the way that you and Danny have been exchanging stares, and so have the rest of my table. Rumour has it that Danny has a big chip on his shoulder, don't let him rub you up the wrong way okay, people are watching you."
"There's nothing he could say about me that would provoke a reaction," I said, "you don't need to worry."
I walked Harry back to his table. "Enjoy the rest of your night, Jack," he said, "and treat her well," he said, nodding towards Emily. "She looks nice."
"I will, and she is," I smiled.
As Harry sat down, I said a polite hello to the rest of his table, and continued my journey towards the bar and the hunched over figure of Danny Evans who leaned against it, waiting for a drink.
I stood next to him and put my empty glass down. "A pint of Stella, please," I said to the barmaid.
Danny turned his head slowly. "Enjoying your ban?" he said, a smirk playing across his pudgy features.
"Not as much as I enjoyed putting you in your place," I said, leaning on an elbow and lowering myself to his height.
"That was a sucker punch," he said, "try it again, if you're man enough."
I smiled. "I don't need to prove anything to you," I said, "anyway, it was your fault. You played dirty and you got burned."
"It was a pleasure seeing you get sent off, knowing I'd caused it. I just wish I'd pushed these a little further into your eyes," he said, holding up his thick fingers and rotating his hand.
I took a deep breath and let his comments go over my head. There was no way I would jeopardise my job with the club, or my relationship with Emily, over a few comments from an overweight forward, who was way beyond his prime.
"It's water under the bridge, Danny boy," I said, "let it go."
Danny looked towards my table. "I see you've got yourself a bird," he said, "I wouldn't have had her down as your type though, Jack. She's a bit big isn't she?"
I swallowed hard and tried to ignore the red mist that was rising.
"Leave it out," I said, "say what you want about me, but don't you say a word about the woman, who I happen to think is perfect."
Danny laughed. "It's like that film… Shallow Hal. Everyone else can see that your dating a fat bitch, but you can't. It's fucking hilarious."
I lost my battle with self-control and my fist flew through the air, connecting with Danny's top lip, splitting it and knocking him backwards. As he fell, I punched him again, and when he was on the floor, I bent over him, and punched him again, and again… and again.
Chapter Twenty-Six
~Emily~
It all happened so fast. One second Jack was talking to the man who'd been pointed out to me as Danny Evans, and in the next second, Jack had punched him and knocked him down, following him to the floor as he fell.
I stood up to try and make my way towards the fighting men, but everybody else had had the same idea, and my path was blocked by people standing on tiptoe, trying to see what the commotion was.
Andy cleared a path for me, pushing people aside as he stormed through the crowd, his large bulk cutting through the congregation with ease.
By the time I'd got there, Jack was being led out of the room by two large men, and Danny Evans whose face was red with blood, was being helped to his feet by a woman and a man.
"What happened?" said Megan, gripping my forearm.
"I think Jack just ruined any chance he had of playing next season, and his chances with me," I said, feeling the colour drain from my face.
I'd not seen a real fight since my school days, and watching Danny as he was helped from the room, blood pouring from his nose and lip, and knowing that Jack had done it, made me feel sick.
"I'm going home," I said to Megan.
"I'll come with you," said Megan, "give me a minute to tell Andy."
"No. I want to be alone," I said, "I'll call you tomorrow."
Megan released my arm. "Are you sure?" she said, "should you be alone? You're in shock."
I tried to smile, but my face was frozen. "I'm fine," I said, "I need to be alone."
Megan grabbed her phone from her bag. "I'll phone you a taxi," she said, bringing it to her ear.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
~Emily~
Four weeks later
"Yes, I've seen the papers," I said, "he's retired from rugby."
"Not retired, he's just taking a break while he sorts himself out," said Megan. "Danny Evans isn't pressing charges, as long as Jack takes an extended break. Andy thinks that Danny just wanted him out for next season, it gives Danny's team a better chance of winning the cup."
Megan took a handful of books from a shelf and put them into a box on my desk. "I can't believe you're going," she said, "I'll miss you."
I unhooked my framed certificate from the nail in the wall, and placed it on top of the books. "You can come and visit whenever you like," I said, "you know that, and anyway, it's Christmas soon. I'll be back for a week."
The American doctor in charge of the airbase had almost bitten my hand off when I'd enquired about a position, and had given me an open start date. I'd thought about waiting until the new year, but the German markets in the run up to Christmas were spectacular, and would be a great place to buy presents.
"I think you should speak to him," she said, "he just wants to explain himself. He's mortified about what happened."
I shook my head. "No. Anyway, wasn't it you that warned me away from him? I told you then that I wouldn't accept any bad behaviour from him."
Megan sat in my seat at the desk and gestured at the one reserved for patients. "Sit down," she said, "I think I
should tell you what happened that night."
I sat down, picking up the paperweight that Jack had bought for me. It felt oddly disarming to be in the patient's seat. "Go on," I said.
Megan sighed. "I didn't want to tell you, because I didn't want to hurt your feelings, but Jack's really missing you, and he's changed. It's only been a month, but he's changed."
I found it odd that Megan had contact with Jack and I didn't, but she was dating his best friend, so I had no right to feel jealous, or hard done by. "Go on," I said, "hurt my feelings."
"Danny provoked him, Emily. He said something horrible about you."
"Like?"
"He called you overweight, but using a far less polite choice of words. Jack thought he was protecting your honour."
I looked down at my thighs. I was a little overweight, but Jack had said he liked my body, and that had been all that counted.
"Tell me the exact words," I said, "I can take it."
Megan looked embarrassed. "He suggested that Jack was like Hal in Shallow Hal. You know, he couldn't see— "
"Yes, I've seen the film. I get it."
"And he used the word bitch. Jack just lost it, and if you ask me, Danny deserved what he got."
I spun the paperweight in my hand. "Fighting though? In public? That's so not me, Megan. You know that. I can't be with a man who thinks it's okay to punch another person, because he said something he didn't like."
"I know you, Emily," said Megan, "I've known you for a long time, and in the weeks you were with Jack, I've never seen you so happy. Andy said the same about Jack. We both think you should just talk. That's it, just a talk… no strings."
The paperweight glinted and I put it back on the desk. "Okay," I said, "tell him I'll see him."
Megan stood up. "I'll tell him right now. He's sitting in my car outside, like a good little boy."
I sat up straight. "What? Why?"
Megan smiled. "Because I know you too well, Emily. I knew you'd say yes. I'm just speeding things along… like I did in the hotel. Call me your fairy godmother if you like."
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Jack
The reception room was empty, although that was no surprise — Megan had told me that Emily had let Sandra go, and stopped seeing patients when she'd decided she was moving to Germany.
I'd been shocked when Megan had told me that Emily had already turned down a job offer overseas to be with me. It had made me feel worse than I already did.
The door was ajar and Emily was sitting behind her desk. The walls of her office were bare apart from a few posters advocating a healthy lifestyle, and a clock which filled the quiet room with its ticks.
Boxes were stacked in the corner, and the only object still on her desk was the paperweight I had bought for her.
"Hi," I said, stepping towards the desk. "Thanks for agreeing to see me."
"Sit down, Jack," she said.
The seat creaked under my weight, and I leaned over the desk, looking Emily straight in the eyes which I'd missed so much. "I'm sorry, Emily," I said, "really, I am. I'm sorry you had to see what happened with Danny and me."
"It was a shock," said Emily, dropping her eyes. "I don't like violence, Jack. For any reason."
"I know," I said, "Danny said some pretty awful stuff and I lost it."
"Megan told me what he said, but you don't need to protect me. I can take criticism."
I leaned back into my seat. "Yeah, I know, but it made me mad, that bullshit he said about you. It was out of order."
"Well, I could lose a little weight," said Emily, with a smile that made my stomach knot. "Maybe he had a point.
"No way!" I said, "you're perfect as you are… and I miss you. A lot. More than I've ever missed anyone before."
Emily's cheeks flushed with colour, and I wanted nothing more than to kiss her. "I've missed you too," she said, "but what you did that night scared me. I'm not sure you can ever be any different Jack. I can't spend my life worrying about what you're up to. It wouldn't be fair."
Hearing Emily talk about me in the context of her life, made me understand that I'd do anything to have her back in mine. "I know it hasn't been long," I said, "but I'm changing. Really changing. I've not touched any alcohol since that night, and I've left the bears… I'm taking a year out from rugby. I'd do anything to have you back in my life… anything. You're more important to me than drinking or getting angry, you're everything to me, and I'm lost without you."
"What do you want me to do, Jack? Tell you I won't go to Germany because you say you're changing?"
I shook my head. "No… yes." I gathered my thoughts. "I just want to be with you, that's all. I'd go to Germany with you if you wanted… if you'd let me. Or, you could stay here, with me. I need you in my life, Emily, that's what it all boils down to, and I'd do whatever it takes to have you in it."
"I think that boat has sailed," Emily said, the pun feeling a little cruel. "I'm sorry, Jack."
"Will you do one more thing for me?" I asked, attempting my puppy dog eyes, but feeling as if my face was begging.
"What?"
"Will you take me home?" I said, "I told Megan to go without me."
Emily stood up. "I can do that for you, Jack," she said.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
~Emily~
Jack kept quiet until I indicated left towards his apartment block. "No," he said, "I don't live there anymore. Carry on out of town, I'll show you the way."
I'd never thought that Jack would leave his penthouse. When I'd teased him about it, telling him he was living the playboy lifestyle, he'd just shrugged it off with a laugh. He'd loved his top floor living style, and I was a little shocked that he'd moved out.
"You've moved?" I said, taking the ring-road out of town. "Why?"
"Like you said, I was living like a playboy. I thought it was about time I grew up a bit."
Jack directed me onto leafy lanes that headed deep into the countryside. "Is it far?" I said, taking a sweeping left bend.
"No, It's a mile or so up this lane," he said, "only twenty minutes from town, but far enough into the countryside for some privacy."
I drove over a small hump backed bridge that crossed a stream and Jack pointed to a small track on the right. "Up there," he said.
The track led to a gravelled area with enough space for a few cars, and next to it, behind a white picket fence was the most beautiful cottage I'd ever seen.
With whitewashed stone walls and a mature garden, the cottage was large, but unobtrusive against it's gorgeous wooded backdrop. A rose bush framed the large wooden door, it's flowers long since killed off by winter, and the upstairs windows were charmingly crooked.
"Wow," I said, "it's certainly a change from the penthouse. Did you buy it?"
"I already owned it," he said, opening his door and stepping out of the car with a crunch on the gravel. "I own a few properties, but this one was standing empty. It needs a little work, but when it's finished it will be perfect."
Jack led me to the little wooden gate and pushed it open for me. "Come on," he said, "there's something I want to show you."
Jack headed around the rear of the cottage, following a little path which was bordered by raised flower beds. I followed him until the path opened up onto a long large garden, and at the bottom, beneath an old oak tree, stood a small outhouse with a bench outside and a pond to the side.
"It's lovely," I said, sucking in the fresh air and allowing the feeling of tranquillity to wash over and through me.
Jack shifted on the spot and dropped his head. "I thought the summerhouse would be perfect," he said.
"Perfect for what?"
"For your office, Emily," he said.
"What do you mea —"
"Please let me speak, Emily," he said, "I really need to."
I smiled. "Go on."
"I know you had your heart set on Germany," he said, "but imagine it, Emily. Me and you living here, with bees and chickens, or whatever manner of c
reature you want. I'll even get you that emu you were looking at in the dog sanctuary if you want. Imagine having your office at the bottom of the garden, and imagine how calm your patients would feel coming here."
I opened my mouth to speak, smiling at the idea of an emu in the garden.
"Of course, there's room in the office for Sandra too, and if you can't employ her, I can. I've started a charitable foundation, helping animals, and I could do with some help."
"Jack, what were you thinking?" I said, staring around the garden. "What do you want me to say."
Jack coughed and dropped to his knee, his hair blowing in the breeze and his words making shapes in the cold air. "I was hoping you'd say yes," he said, retrieving a sparkling diamond ring from his jacket pocket.
I stared at the man who looked at me with enough love in his eyes to last a lifetime, and made a decision. My heart skipped a beat as I gave him my trembling hand.
"Yes," I said, my voice cracking. "I will."
Epilogue
~Emily~
Five years later
The crowd sang along with the team as the national anthem burst through the speakers, filling Twickenham stadium with patriotism.
"Mummy," said Archie, pressing his small body against mine. "Why has Daddy got an armband on, and no one else has?"
"Because he's the captain," I said, watching Jack on the huge screen that towered over the crowd. His arm was around Andy's shoulder, who stood next to him, singing just as proudly as my husband was.
It was to be his last game, and his twenty fifth cap for his country. Not bad for a man who'd spent a large proportion of his career sitting out playing bans, and for a man who was almost thirty-eight.
Archie pushed his hand into mine and I gave it a gentle squeeze. "I want to be like Daddy when I grow up," he said, "I want to be a rugby player."
If my three-year-old son grew up to be half the man that Jack had become, I would be proud. "Daddy would like that," I said, taking my hand from my son's and clapping as the anthem ended while the men made their way to their positions on the field, ready for kick off.
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