Again, they agree. There isn’t one man in this room who objects to the idea.
“Perfect. One thing is settled. I’ve spoken to Damon about the possibility of Kristie patchin’ in as a prospect.” I state, but quickly get interrupted.
“Kristie? Whoa. You mean the FBI agent who’s friends with Reed’s ol’ lady from the Skulls Renegade MC?” Bull asks, showing how he’s already not a fan of the idea.
“Yes, that’s exactly who I’m speaking about.” I clearly state.
“But . . . she’s a chick.” He points out.
I shut my eyes for a second, taken aback by his words. “No shit. Yeah, she’s a chick. One who’s shown interest in the MC life. She doesn’t wanna start up with the Skulls ‘cause of Elena and Reed’s position in the club . . . so I’ve given it some thought and I wanna have her prospect for us. I had spoken to Damon about potentially sending her down to Vegas but they have enough shit goin’ on. The floor is open, so please, be honest and tell me what y’all think about it.”
“We ain’t ever had a female member before,” Zorro comments lowly.
“Dunno how I feel about it,” Axel ends up agreeing with Zorro.
“Shit, it would be different. That’s for sure.” Bull mutters, lookin’ around to the rest of the brothers.
Though, Blackjack is the one who surprises me. “I say we go for it. Other clubs have female members and they’re doin’ just fine. Look at the Iron Vex MC up in Queens, New York. Boss is a woman, and she’s a Prez. Not only that, she has women who prospect and women who are fully patched members. She’s not the only woman I know of in the life either. Gamble down in Baltimore, or . . . I don’t know if she’s in Baltimore anymore. Her kid got hurt and some shit happened. But she was named Prez of the Baltimore charter of the Royal Bastards.”
I need to put pause on this discussion for a second. “What do you mean?” Gamble’s an ally to the club, but not because of those Royal Bastards. Because of her father, who was a great friend to my father. Shit. Rancid, the old National Charter Prez of the Royal Bastards slaughtered her entire family in front of her, then took her as his own personal fuck toy. If you ask me, he only made her a charter Prez to fuck with her, to make her somethin’ to be laughed at. But Gamble, shit . . . she’s too strong for that. Anythin’ she puts her mind to, she can do.
My dad told me years ago the deal was almost made with the Knights of Retribution MC, not the Raiders. But Gamble’s dad didn’t wanna take the choice away from her. It was noble of him.
“About what, her kid?” Blackjack inquires.
“Yeah, what happened to Ace?” Ace is her daughter, who’s about a year old now if I’m addin’ shit up correctly. Shit . . . maybe she’s two? Fuck.
“She got hurt. An enemy of the club. I haven’t spoken to Gamble in a minute, though. But, she did tell me she was gonna call soon. I have a feelin’ . . . somethin’ is goin’ down.”
“What is that supposed to mean? Shit, Blackjack.” I grumble, frustrated as hell.
Blackjack sucks in a breath, “Now none of you say shit to anyone . . . but she might’ve told me she’s plannin’ on leavin’ the Royal Bastards. Ace almost died, brothers. A baby, who’s barely holdin’ on as we sit here and discuss this. Gamble knows this was a dig at the Royal Bastards and not her. So, she asked if we would offer her support if she decides to find another club, or start her old man’s club up again. I told her we’d support her no matter what, that none of the shit mattered to us.”
“Her father was one of the good ones,” Tex speaks up, giving his support.
“Damn straight,” Bolt confirms.
“If it comes down to it, the Reapers have her back. Whether she wants to come here or not. That being said, we don’t put family down. Gamble’s family had been an ally since 1979 when their club was founded. While the Knights of Retribution died, it didn’t mean our alliance with her did. Kristie is a friend of the Skulls, someone we can trust. Reed and Elena would offer her a spot with the Skulls, but Kristie doesn’t want that. So, given the current world we live in, I think we should embrace the changes that’re coming and start allowing female members. All in favor of allowing Kristie to prospect here, say aye.”
Immediately Blackjack replies, “Aye.”
Hammer nods, “Aye, if my vote counts.”
I smirk, ‘cause he damn well knows it doesn’t, but I appreciate his support.
“Aye, bring Kristie in.” Dracus states.
Bolt and Tex both agree, while Axel and Zorro seem to have some reservations. This is something we’ve never done before, so I understand their hesitance behind the issue. “Brothers, our club is going to change. We can’t help that, but we can control it if we’re the one making changes now versus getting this shit hounded on us by the women later, feelin’ forced to make it to keep peace.”
Axel huffs, “Prez, just do what you’re gonna do . . . ‘cause I don’t see this as somethin’ I’ll ever want.”
“Zorro?” I inquire.
“If it’s what’s best for the club, then we should do it.” He keeps his response plain and simple, which I appreciate.
“Perfect. I’ll get in touch with her and formally invite her to become a prospect up here. Now, for the last order of business, which I believe is long overdue. We need to vote on our permanent Vice Prez. Blackjack’s been holdin’ down the fort for a long ass time, and as Prez, I’m going to recommend he stay in the position. All in favor, say aye.”
Brother after brother confirms Blackjack is just as I thought— the right choice as VP. Things will never be the same here, but they don’t have to be. We’re ready to face our new normal, and I have a feeling we’ll come out strong like we always do with whatever punches have been thrown our way.
We’re all going to be okay.
Chapter Twenty-One
“Be strong enough to let go, and wise enough to wait for what you deserve.”
~ Unknown
Octavia
His hands close in around my neck while his body hovers over me, plunging his cock deep inside. His body is a mere figment of darkness, a silhouette if you will. He doesn’t make a sound, and the only sounds coming from around us is our bodies reactions to the other.
He pulls his hands from my throat and shields his face against my chest. His arms go underneath my legs and hoist me up, ramming his member into me harder and harder. Boiling heat fills me at my core. I bite my lip, barely holding on, knowing at any given moment I’m going to implode. God, he knows just how to fuck me.
I glide my arm around his back, trying to force his head up to mine. I want to kiss him so much, so badly. I want his lips crashing down on mine, sucking me in like I’m oxygen.
He lifts his hips up and delves deep inside, faster, harder and before I can try to pull away to make this feeling last for just a bit longer I can’t. I’m cumming around his dick. Even though I’m cumming, he doesn’t stop. But that’s okay. Zane always does this. He takes what’s his and enjoys every moment of it, keeping me on the edge from falling over and over again.
Finally, he lifts his head and I kiss him. His lips and mine collide in the most sinful of ways. It may seem insane, but my favorite part about Zane is the way he kisses me. He shows me with his passion how important I am to him, how he craves me like nothing else. It’s part of the reason I’m falling in love with him. Slowly, but surely.
He pulls his head back and light illuminates his face. That’s when I realize this isn’t Zane. “Does he fuck you like I do, O’?” Inc asks, chuckling devilishly.
My chest begins to burn, almost like it’s on fire and I just can’t put it out. I thrash and move in every direction. Tears spill down my cheeks at the betrayal, the heartache and everything else I feel when it comes to Inc, but most of all, I cry because I still love him. I still love him and yet I don’t know why I do. This is the man who stood by and let me be ripped from his life. The man who I thought would fight for me no matter the cost.
The pain is just . .
. too much.
“Cinnamon, Cin!” Zane says my name rather strongly, causing me to feel like he’s worried. His voice causes me to wake up. I blink my eyes over and over again, looking around me and realize we’re in our bed.
Everything’s okay. I’m in my house. I’m where I’m supposed to be.
“I’m sorry,” I stammer out automatically, feeling my heart pump over and over in my chest.
“Octavia . . . what the hell is going on? You . . .” Zane starts off, but stops, and then starts again.
A shiver takes hold of me and I begin to shake. Zane takes notice and pulls me into his chest, rubbing my back soothingly. “I’m so sorry. I keep dreaming about him and I don’t mean to. He . . . no, you . . . I don’t know.”
“What the hell happened?” Zane asks, sounding defeated.
“I was having a dream about us having sex. You and me, but then you . . . you turned into him. He asked me if you fuck like him. It was . . . I . . . I don’t know why this keeps happening, Zane. I keep having dreams about him and I don’t understand it.”
Zane sighs against me, placing his chin on top of my head. “You didn’t get any closure with him, Cinnamon. This is probably your conscious telling you that you haven’t said everything you need to him.”
I don’t know what comes over me, but I spit it out quicker than I realize. “I think I’m having these dreams because I’m starting to fall for you, Zane. I’m so confused on why this is happening, why I’m being torn in two directions.” I mumble against his chest, feeling the tears from my dream pouring out into my reality.
As he does every time my emotions best me, he wipes my tears away. “Hey now, no need for that. You’re okay. I’m okay. We’re okay.” Zane presses his lips to my temple and inhales. “Octavia Spencer. I’m startin’ to feel the same. You’ve nestled your way deep in my heart. You know that?”
Fuck. I don’t want to hurt Zane. I like him so much, every single thing about him . . . but I’m so fucking confused. Inc still plagues my mind, and I just . . . I wonder if he’s right. If I didn’t get my closure. Do I need it? Will speaking to Inc make all this stop? I don’t want to keep feeling like my heart’s at a crossroads. Stuck in the middle between the man I still love to this day, and the one who’s pulling my heart toward him.
I peer up to him and try to look into those kind eyes of his, but it’s the middle of the night and pitch black. “I think you’re right about me needing to speak to him. Maybe if I talk it out and we say our goodbyes on my terms . . . I might feel different.”
“You mean you’ll stop torturing yourself subconsciously?” Zane chuckles lowly, toying with me just a tad.
“Maybe,” I murmur, not knowing if it’ll help or make things worse. Though, I am hoping it’ll only make things better.
“Octavia, I want to suggest something to you.” Zane starts off, sounding a bit more serious.
“What’s that?” I inquire.
“Have you given any thought about asking him if he wants to be our third?” I stare blankly at him, not giving it any thought until now.
“I don’t know if this is a test or if you’re being serious.” I confess.
He pulls me closer, placing his chin on top of my head once again. “Cinnamon, I just want you to be happy. At the end of the day I know we can be happy together, but I’m not dumb. Your heart is still gonna long for him because he means so much to you, even though he did treat you like shit . . . and I respect that. I . . . I cherish you enough to suggest you speak to him about it.”
“I don’t think he’s bisexual, Zane.” I inform him, knowing our arrangement wouldn’t work at all.
He scoffs, “You know I don’t need him to be. Your happiness matters more to me, but if he loves you and wants you, he would consider it. I can always get dick somewhere else. But, I’d prefer not to. You and I have discussed this babe. We want this to be a group experience, not just one or the other.”
“You’re right. If we have another man in our relationship . . . I think it could only work if they’re sexually attracted to both of us.” I state as I did before when we spoke about it the first time. “Zane, I don’t want to be with Inc on the side. And I don’t want you to be with another man on the side. I just want us to have one person who loves the both of us the same way we l—” I stop immediately, almost letting it slip how I really feel about him.
“I understand. Though, I still say you need to talk to him, and maybe you need to pop the idea in his head. He probably thought there was no way he could ever have you in his life. Now there is, with the small agreement of me.” Zane chuckles at the end.
“Nothing about you is small,” I chirp.
“Keep talkin’ like that and I’ll have to remind you how much I fill that cunt of yours,” He warns, but I’ll take it. Anytime he fucks me, I don’t think about anything else. The only thing I’m focused on is the way he makes my body feel.
Taking his face in my hands, “Zane, please.”
The next thing I know, we’re rolling between the sheets, filling both the voids in our hearts.
Chapter Twenty-Two
“Listen to your own voice, your own soul, too many people, listen to the noise of the world, instead of themselves.”
~ Leon Brown
Octavia
After our discussion two weeks ago, Zane booked a flight for this afternoon for us to go back out to LA. He didn’t want to leave before then because the foreman for the construction work turned out to be a huge tool, and no, I’m not talking about the ones the guy used. He kept making excuse after excuse until Zane lost his shit and fired him. Now we have a new contracting company working on the advancements up at the club.
Nothing else has been going on, except the fact I signed the agreement for King Rhodes to formally become an investor in Victorious Vixens. We have a launch planned for later this year, but he primarily resides in LA. The plan is for us to meet him while we’re down here for the weekend. He has a concept he wants to run by me. Something about a new club for the Vixens that he’s opening up in Baltimore, which is where he’s from.
Zane got us a nice hotel downtown, right by the clubhouse. It’s not only convenient, but has the most beautiful views of LA. Though, I’m a bit worried about being back here. The last time I was downtown someone was trying to kill me. I think the only reason things have been safe for me up in Montana is because the club is back in the middle of nowhere. Sure, we’re a short ride from Billings but we aren’t smack dab in the center of everything.
It’ll be nice to see Chains though, so I can’t even hold back my excitement when it comes to that. Zane’s caught me smiling a few times, and he thought I was smiling because I’ll be seeing Inc again. But he was wrong. The thought of seeing Inc makes my stomach turn like I’m on the world’s fastest roller coaster and just ate Thanksgiving dinner.
“Gotta admit. I’m not thrilled about seein’ your brother and dad again.” Zane mutters, holding my hand as we sit in the back of our Uber.
Zane also wants to take this opportunity to discuss a few political things with the alliance. First and foremost, if we figured out who was behind the attacks. Zane won’t ever let anything happen to me so neither of us are worried. However, we both want justice for my sisters.
“Can’t blame you for that. He was a dick.” I shrug, hating how I left. Dad and I never had the best relationship, but we didn’t have a bad one. I feel like the way he acted last time was a really bad representation of who he is as not only a person, but a man and a father.
Zane turns and looks straight at me. “He not normally like that?”
“No, not really. I mean. He’s not a great guy or anything, but he’s usually half-way decent. Lately he’s been running around, going out to drink a lot.”
“Sounds like someone I know,” Zane jokes. We both established I was using alcohol to cope with everything I went through. After Zane got me my new phone, he got me in touch with a virtual therapist who I could talk to about the losses
I’ve gone through.
It was one of the ways he continued to show me he wasn’t faking how he feels. He genuinely cares about my well-being and that only makes me appreciate him more. We’ve really grown a lot since we’ve met. Honestly, I think we started developing a friendship before we even fucked, which I’m sure only helped.
“Yeah, yeah. I know.” I roll my eyes and laugh.
“Hopefully shit will go smoothly for both of us.” Zane says, making the air thicken in the back of this car. While he’s speaking to my brother and father, if my father even bothers to show up. I’ll be talking to Inc, seeing what he thinks about . . . a few things.
I’m not going to come straight off the bat and ask him about it though. I’ll just ask that he meet us at our hotel room tonight and we’ll see how things go. We’ll have a couple drinks, smoke a couple blunts and hopefully things will naturally fall into place.
“We’re coming up to it now,” I murmur, just as our Uber driver pulls up to the sidewalk. Zane opens his door and exits, holding a hand out to me and I follow him. In a mere moment we’re walking through the front doors of The Clubhouse.
When we’re on the other side, the bartender immediately looks our direction and smiles brightly. It’s Fury. What a relief. “I wasn’t expectin’ you back here so soon, O’.”
“What. You aren’t glad to see me?” I joke.
“I never said such a thing. Chains is in the back.” He motions with his head, pointing to the part of the bar that turns into the actual clubhouse. I walk alongside Zane until we’re back to the doorway leading into the club and open it. I walk through first and he follows suit, shutting the door behind him.
“I must be seein’ shit.” Chains says, staring blankly at me.
Instead of saying anything, I run straight up to him and wrap my arms around the man. “I missed you,” I say into the nape of his neck. He holds me close, breathing heavily against me.
Zane (Reapers MC Book 11) Page 11