by J. C. Cliff
“Have you had an epiphany yet?”
“Please, Sir,” I swallow hard, “Sir, I will do what you want, anything...just please, stop...” Fragmented words manage to spill out between broken sobs. Suddenly, I feel the hard lines of his body pressing into my backside, his erection gouging into my ass. My sweat is mixed with blood, and it blends together with his body heat as he singes and sears my tender, torn tissue. All I can do is let out a hoarse whimper.
“No, Princess, this is your reminder to never forget. I have already given you too much leniency and look where it’s gotten me. I will never make that mistake again. You need to understand these three simple words,” he breathes over me in a menacing tone. “Live them, breathe them, be them—I. Own. You.”
There’s a quiet pause in the room, and I pray to God he’s finished, and perhaps he’s changed his mind, because he hasn’t moved away from me. His breathing tickles my earlobe as he continues to hover over me. Suddenly, my entire body jerks as his thunderous boom shouts in my ear, “Do you understand?!”
A scratchy scream emits forth as my reply. “Yes, Sir! Yes, Sir, I understand!” Tears continue to soak the silk blindfold. My body is shaking uncontrollably, and my teeth clatter nonstop against each other, most likely from shock. This man is absolutely insane.
“You need to understand that more than you need your next breath, Princess. You control nothing; I control you.” He reaches around to pinch my clit ruthlessly between his fingertips. “You have much to learn about submitting your mind and your body to me.” His other hand snakes around to pinch my nipple while he kisses the tender spot behind my ear. I’m stunned speechless.
All I can do is take it. If I fight him, it will only make things worse for me, if that’s even possible. So I let my free will betray me as I hear my voice come out broken, cracked and defeated. “I’m sorry, Sir. I am yours.”
He chuckles. “You’re a quick learner. I knew you were an intelligent one. You’re body knows what feels good, doesn’t it? You should listen to it more often. I know you’d like to think you’re immune to this drug, but you’re not. You’re going to have to face the cold, hard truth that your mind is no longer your own. I own it.”
He releases my clit and I brace myself for more pain, but instead, my body has a sweet surge of release as I fall into a mini orgasmic spasm. “You’re so responsive,” his husky voice whispers in my ear, “so beautiful tied up like this, with pink welts on your back, your ass, marking you, making you mine.” His warm body steps away and I whimper. “Now, to finish your punishment.”
I shake my head profusely, pleading, “Please! Please, no more, sir.” Choked sobs resurface all over again, and my heart rate spikes. Fighting the urge to panic, a thousand emotions start racing through my mind all at once.
Nick must focus all his energy into the swing of the whip, because the explosive pain that hits me seems far worse than all the others combined. The whip slices through me like a sharp steel knife as pelting strikes accost me from all angles, raining down on me one after the other. My cries go ignored as he strikes across the already tender flesh of my inner thighs, and all the way back up to my shoulder blades.
At some point in this hell of mine, my wails of panic-stricken sobs dissipate. I have somehow become lost in a powerful and indescribable high. The pain has amazingly subsided to the point of being forgotten, and all my problems and cares suddenly drift away into nothingness. I’ve come to a celestial resting place in my mind, where pain and pleasure have consigned my brain to a hypnotic trance.
As I float away with this ecstatic feeling, I feel Nick pressing himself against my backside again. It feels so good as he sweeps the hardness of his cock over my wet folds, teasing me open with the tip of its soft head. He keeps me in limbo as he continually teases me with it, rhythmically moving back and forth, barely placing himself inside my opening. I let out a desperate moan as my body tries to grind back into him, wanting to take all of him inside me.
“You belong to me, love,” he murmurs with tender compassion. “Say it. Say you want me.”
My stomach flips and my pussy clenches urgently, grabbing and contracting at nothing. “Oh…Nick…please, take me.”
“No, say you want me.”
“I want you, Nick.”
“Again.”
“Nick, please…I want you. I need you. Please, give yourself to me.”
He growls as he holds onto my hips, and slowly, carefully, he guides himself past my opening. The thickness of his cock stretches my core further as he begins to push himself in inch by slow inch as he enters me from behind. I feel my muscles exquisitely expand to accommodate the full length of his thickness as he fills me.
We simultaneously moan in ecstasy as he begins to pull back out of me. My core greedily fights to tighten and clench around his girth, not wanting him to pull out, going to any length necessary to keep him inside me. He pauses when the very tip of his cock rests just inside my opening. My greedy pussy clenches around him, beckoning for him to come back in. I sigh out in relief and savor the feeling when he slides his full length back into the depths of my warm center. His movements are controlled, slow strokes as he gives my body what it craves.
He lets out a satisfied groan. “Oh, God, baby. It seems I’ve waited a lifetime for this very moment.”
I thought I’d be petrified of sex for the first time, but my body has welcomed it. I relish the feel of him as he strokes in and out of me over and over again. I’m in a trance-like state, a certain high I don’t ever want to come down from. I’ve never felt this in my entire life, and it’s an exquisite euphoria. I don’t ever want to leave this place.
“Nick...” I murmur, as if his name is a prayer. There is no pain; my entire world has disappeared, leaving only me, Nick, and the blissful edge I’m on.
“Yes, love, I know. I’ll take care of you.” His soft words soothe me, and I feel warm inside. His every stroke, touch, and kiss is a balm to my soul.
As Nick pumps into me from behind, he brings me to new heights. He was right; the first day I met him, he told me I would be screaming his name for something I couldn’t yet comprehend. I had no idea it was this good, this intense, or this extreme. I hear myself murmuring his name over and over again.
“I’m right here, sweetheart, inside of you.” As I feel his hands worshiping every inch of my body, his touch has turned tender, gentle, and loving. He undulates his hips in a wide circle, moving his penis in all directions inside me in a rhythm all his own. There are no words. “Welcome to the feeling of Blyss, love. You’re learning to fly in subspace.”
“Nick,” I whisper, “I don’t want this feeling to stop.”
I hear him growl into my neck, and then he swirls his tongue in an orgasm-summoning kiss over my ear. My heart rate increases as I feel my orgasm building. I’m drenched in sweat and wrapped up in everything that is Nick. I can truly see how this type of sex can be so addictive.
His thrusts become more desperate as he plunges his tongue in and out of my ear. It’s erotic, and I’m hovering on an edge I’ve never been on before. I can feel the hard lines of his massive body working behind me, and I can hear the wetness as our bodies slap together.
“Come for me, Princess. Let me feel your pussy quake around my cock.”
The instant I feel him rub tiny circles around my clit, I fall apart, calling out his name in soft, exhausted murmurs. His muscular forearm is wrapped around my waist, holding up most of my body weight since my arms had given out long ago.
My legs shake with turbulent tremors. I lose my breath in the most intense orgasm I’ve ever known. “Breathe, baby. I’m going to come with you.” And he does, because I can feel his cock pulsating deep inside me, and it only serves to extend my own delicious spasms.
With my body limp and defeated, a deep exhaustion begins to overtake me. I feel so disconnected from reality I don’t even realize Nick has started to unstrap my lifeless body from the cross. I try focusing on small details, but I c
an’t; my brain has turned to mush. My arms and legs are stiff and numb, feeling detached from my body, like they’re too far away to be a part of me. It’s a bizarre feeling.
The blindfold is removed, and I feel terribly unsteady on my feet. Nick has to hold me up under my arms, and I’m thankful he’s careful not to touch my battered back. He guides me to the bed, laying me on my stomach. I feel him working around my ankles, and it’s then I remember I’m still wearing heels. The soft, cool mattress is a welcome feeling, and I close my eyes, relishing the comfort.
Through this weird out-of-body haze I’m experiencing, I hear Nick softly speak behind me in the background. “Such a beautiful sight.” Then, I feel the mattress dip down as Nick lays naked beside me. The crisp sheets feel cool against my skin, and I suddenly realize I’m chilled. Visible shivers begin taking over, wracking my body to the point my teeth chatter. I swear it feels as if I just stepped into the North Pole. Nick notices my duress immediately and pulls the comforter up over both of us. He pulls me into his side, providing me with his body heat.
“Shh, love, everything is going to be fine.” He tenderly strokes my hair, pushing it away from my face, exposing the side of my neck. He leans in to press his lips against my temple as he softly whispers, “The moment you gave your body and soul to me...my God, it was the most magnificent thing I’ve ever seen.” He pauses. “Look at me, please.” I peer through blurry eyes to find the most sincere, heart-warming smile on his lips, and his eyes exude a tender mercy.
“I love you, Julianna. I hope you understand now that you’re mine.” I close my eyes and let a few stray tears escape and run over my cheek. This is too much for me to swallow right now. Feeling his erection on my hip, I know I can’t do this again. I’m already shattered and deeply exhausted.
He kisses my silent tears away. “Even your tears speak of surrender to me, a symbolic surrender, and they’re priceless. You could never know how much you mean to me.” He kisses another tear before it gets away from him. “This...this right here is the start of something beautiful. Right now, I could take you again and again, but I’m not going to; I’m not an animal. It’s my job to see to your needs and to know what you require before even you do. I get off on pampering you during your aftercare, just as much as I get off seeing you on that cross. Mark my words—we will be happy together. I can feel it.”
He reaches behind him, searching for something on the nightstand. I hear paper crinkling, and my brows furrow in question. Then my senses pick up the smell of chocolate as it wafts under my nose. My mouth immediately begins to salivate. Nick brings a small piece of chocolate to my lips and murmurs for me to open. I comply, tasting the sweet, delicious, sugary candy.
“Let it melt on your tongue; it will help you. I won’t leave you until I know you’ve safely come down.” He leans in, pressing a tender kiss against my cheek. “I need to make sure you’re emotionally stable before I go for the night. Are you okay with that?” he gently questions.
“Yes,” I whisper on a shaky breath. The crazy state of confusion I’m living in takes place front and center, along with his display of genuine affection. I’m so confused. His aftercare of tender ministrations and softly spoken words is a total contradiction to the man who just whipped the living shit out of me. The disorderly jumble of chaos swirling around in my mind sends new streams of silent tears leaking out from the corners of my eyes, and my breath hitches.
“Shh, darling, I’m here.”
What’s even more mystifying and bizarre is I feel as if I truly need him. I have an all-consuming hunger for his affection and consoling care. It feels like the equivalent of dying of thirst in the Sahara Desert, and someone comes along out of the blue and hands over a glass of cool water. I feel so clingy and out of sorts. A strange kind of emotion has transpired within me, and the confusion from it has me shedding tears for an entirely different reason now.
He’s trying to settle the turbulent upheaval in my mind, making me feel warm, adored, and safe. He seems to know exactly what I need right now, because I have never felt this way before. I’m totally out of my element.
I inhale a deep, shaky breath and breathe in Nick’s strong, masculine, and sexy smell. In the back of my mind, I know I will hate him with a vengeance again come tomorrow, especially when the Blyss wears off, but I easily push those thoughts aside for right now. My body melts into his as I snuggle deeper into his arms and lay my cheek down on his warm chest. I close my eyes, sinking into the comfort of Nick’s trance. “Not yet, love. Take a sip of juice for me, yeah?” My body and mind willingly comply with his every wish. “You need to rehydrate.”
With the last sip of juice Nick had diligently given me, and a bar of chocolate later, he snuggles my head back under his chin and onto his muscled chest. My ear rests against the beating rhythm of his heart while he reverently strokes my hair. I bask in his cocoon of tender caresses and compassion. His strong heartbeat thrums, settling my soul with its steady strum.
Nick confuses the hell out of me, and I want to cry all over again for all I’m going through. Even though I’ve quit crying, I feel unstable at the moment as my mind messes with me. I think about how Nick reminds me of a song: ‘You’re in, then you’re out; you’re up, then you’re down…’ Oh, crap, who sings that song? A set of fingers snap inside my head as I remember now—“Hot n Cold” by Katy Perry. Those lyrics seem to have been written just for him.
“When I feel you’ve come down without a crash landing, I will leave you to your sleep. I’m not going to leave you feeling abandoned and lonely. I may be a hard bastard to contend with at times, but as I told you before, I take care of what’s mine. I will tell you a thousand times a day if that’s how much you need to hear it; you mean the world to me, Julianna.”
I find my trembling fingers mindlessly caressing the sprinkling of hair that is scattered across his broad chest. My pale hand is in stark contrast against his unmarred olive complexion.
“I’ve waited forever for this night, Julianna.” He lets out a heavy sigh and pulls me in tighter, his hand gently covering mine, giving it a squeeze. “You couldn’t even begin to know what your words did to me.” Nick sounds pained, like I truly wounded him, and I feel bad about it. Call it Stockholm, I don’t care, but Nick wants to treat me well. He only reacts to what he sees, so if I’m nice, he’s nice back, and so forth.
“I’m sorry, Nick,” I softly whisper. “I didn’t mean it.”
“Don’t ever talk to me like that again,” Nick warns. “You’ve got to get a grip on your mouth, love. As much as I don’t want to continue this punishment, I have to.” I tense; I can’t handle another punishment. “Because of your indiscretions, I’m not going to give you any pain medicine as the final stage of your punishment. So when you wake up, whether it’s in the middle of the night or in the morning, and you’re in throbbing pain, I want every lash across your backside to sting as a constant reminder to you that I am your Master. You will respect me and you will obey me. I am the one who holds the power, not you.”
I nod in acknowledgement as a tear slips over my cheek and onto his chest. He continues stroking my hair and whispers softly, “Trust me—it hurts me worse to know you’re in discomfort, but I can’t have you so blatantly stepping out of line again. I love you, Julianna. Never forget that.”
“Yes, Nick, I’m yours,” I whisper back. I’ve now learned the hard way to tell him what he wants to hear, my pride be damned. So this is the school of hard knocks, huh? I don’t like it, not one bit, but I’m too exhausted right now to fight anymore, nor do I want a repeat. There seems to be no way out of this situation, and I’m too weary to even use my brain cells to think about what just happened in this room tonight.
As the fading fires of my adrenaline-fueled terror from the evening dissipate, I can feel my nerve endings slowly coming back to life. They’re beginning to wake, and it’s not going to be pretty. I clench my hands into fists as the endorphins that were pumping through my bloodstream at full-force n
ow leave me on empty. My body tenses up as I feel the welts on my back throb and swell with each passing second. Each throb begins to grow in intensity, and keeps perfect time with my heartbeat.
“Shhh, now. You’re coming down. Everything is going to be fine.” I want to tell him that’s easy for him to say, but when I move to lift my head, Nick’s hand keeps me pressed against the wall of his chest. I guess I really need to just shut up. Tenderly, he massages my head with his deft fingers as he continues to speak. “You’re safe with me. I will never leave you in this vulnerable state you’re in, no matter how pissed I am at you. This...this right here is about you trusting me to take care of your needs …trusting me with both your body and your mind.”
I have no control over this hellish nightmare I’m living in, and he made sure he broke me, and broke me good. It was a crash course in Submission 101. He was relentless as he made my body submit to his, and then he twisted my mind to his will, using Blyss. Yes, I hate him with a passion, but I can’t fight against him anymore; I don’t have it in me. I’m his, and I’m left perplexed as to how he was able to get both my mind and body working in sync, disassembling every wall I ever erected.
At the moment, I refuse to swim in a sea of guilt over the fact my body, mind, and virginity were meant for Adam, and now he won’t have any of it. The thought leaves a few stray tears behind from what’s left of my depleted emotions. But most of all, I fear Nick. I fear he will go to any length necessary to keep me chained to his hip. He’s a smart man, and I think he’s already thought of every loophole possible to hold me here. I don’t think there are any pitfalls or stones unturned to his masterful plan.
I saw his true colors tonight as he exposed himself to be everything I surmised him to be. His extreme behavior, obsessiveness, control tactics, and violent reactions have opened my eyes to the seriousness of his addiction, which is me. Not only that, but I fear for the fool who ever tries to take me away from him. I believe he will kill them in cold blood and not even blink an eye.