by Jade Alyse
“I thought you said that if I cooked, you wouldn’t invite Brandon…?"
Asha shoved a piece of chicken into her mouth to keep her from answering the question. “Mm, this chicken sure is good, Natalie,” Asha forced through a mouth full of food.
“Asha, this isn’t funny.”
Asha swallowed the remainder of the food in her mouth and said, “Oh lighten up, would you girl? One...he's your best friend and two...he hasn’t even bothered you all night…as a matter of fact, I think he’s more concerned with Jennifer Diaz right now…apparently you didn’t catch the way that he looked at her when he went to get his food…”
Natalie followed Asha’s gaze to the petite, curvaceous, light-skinned Jen, who, too, sat alone, in all of her gorgeous curly-headed Afro-Cuban glory. Natalie then looked at Brandon, who, as Asha had predicted, stared at her.
The weird feeling in her stomach returned, along with a stint of anger, and…jealousy? Was that what she felt? Of course not! She refused to allow herself to be jealous of the way Brandon looked at Jennifer Diaz. She was far above what her feelings were attempting to portray about her. And she refused to falter at a moment of confusion.
With a huff, Natalie went into the kitchen, dug her fingers into the countertop and attempted to occupy herself with something. She knew that she was making more noise than was necessary and huffed some more.
But her brain churned anyway.
The sooner she realized that Brandon was only a friend, the better she would feel, and the feelings would subside, and she would ignore his—oh, was it everything about him? Natalie, quit this now! Where’s the dessert? Look for the dessert, girl! Stop these foolish thoughts! But was it necessary for him to look at Jen Diaz that way?
Jesus, you think you know someone!
Surely you mean more to him than that?
How could he forget their late nights? Their laughs? Their talks? Did he realize that no one listened better than her? How could he forget that no one was more there for him than she was? How could he not see that she cared about him?
Natalie Chandler stepped toward the kitchen door, and the music changed, and she peered into the dark, votive-lit room, and saw it, just as she had predicted…
Brandon and Jen Diaz, sharing a pillow on the floor, she, the curly-headed beauty, sipping from a glass of red wine, leaning into him. She wanted to make herself feel relief, relief that he was no longer fixated on her, that he could actually talk to other girls, and finally get over Sophia.
Maybe his curiosity had peaked with her…maybe he finally got what he wanted. Maybe this was the “real” Brandon Greene that Scotty Kelly was so proud to claim.
Natalie, you get that dessert, and you march right out there and pretend like you don’t care. Show him that he’s not all that matters to you!
And she did, setting the dessert down on the serving table, rejoining the other guests, who now had returned to the center of the floor, bodies warm with alcohol and the couples began to dance, to a slow piano, jazzy number, and the candles flickered.
She watched him, but tried not to. She watched as Jennifer Diaz, stood up, took him by the hands and attempted to pull him up with her, as if to coax him into dancing with her. Brandon kept his place, and after a few moments of visible persuasion, she gave up, and walked toward the other guests. She watched him get to his feet, walk to the serving table and pour himself a glass of red wine. He took a sip in a sophisticated manner, placing his free hand inside his jean pockets, appearing much different than the guy who sat on the couch at the house on Trent road with three beers in his clutch, rudely belching just to annoy her.
Brandon Greene met her gaze, eyes widened in her direction, pursed his lips playfully, and he stepped toward her, his strides long and slow, the rhythm of the music, the pulse, the melody, matching everything that he was at that moment, even from the way that his hair fell into his face, to the smooth rhythm of his rolling shoulders as he walked. He stood beside her and took a deep breath.
“Your food was delicious,” he commented, taking another sip of wine.
She exhaled deeply and said, “Thank you, Brandon…”
Natalie focused her eyes on the crowd before her. She couldn’t look at him…Lord only knows what would happen if she looked at him.
“Where’s your date?”
“What?”
“Your date…where is he?”
Natalie sighed, folded her arms, felt the discomfort cover her. “There’s no date, Brandon…”
“I see…did you give him the wrong address? That must be it…”
“There’s no date, Brandon,” she repeated. “Where is yours? I do believe that Asha said that you were allowed to bring one extra person…”
“Maybe to the rest of the guests,” he said. “But Asha definitely didn’t give me that memo…she said come alone and come looking good…”
“Well you got one of those down pat…”
“You’re hilarious…”
Brandon looked toward the dancing guests for a moment, and she followed his gaze, which landed on Jennifer Diaz.
“She’s pretty,” Natalie commented, trying to sound supportive.
Brandon nodded. “That she is…”
“Almost pretty enough to go over there and talk to her…”
“Already done that,” he said, sipping his wine. “She’s a junior, wants to be a vet, doing a little modeling to make ends meet…”
“Sounds perfect…”
“Hmph…”
“So…go talk to her…”
“Nat, are you trying to pawn me off?”
Natalie Chandler folded her arms. “I’m just being a friend, that’s all…isn’t this what Scotty does when you guys go out?”
“More or less…”
“Then, why can’t I?”
“I’ll choose not to answer that question,” he said quietly. “Besides, she already gave me her phone number…”
Natalie felt light headed. “So…will you call her?”
He didn’t answer. He only sipped his wine, bobbed his head to the music he’d probably never heard before and glanced her over quickly.
“You look amazing…” He said.
“What?”
“Amazing…is what you look.”
“Thank you, Brandon.”
“And you keep saying my name like that because?”
“I don’t know, Brandon…”
“Why don’t you work your magic and snag you a guy out there? I’m sure one is dying to talk to you…”
“All taken,” Natalie remarked. “But I definitely would…”
“You would?”
“Yes,” she said. “Asha has some very handsome male friends…”
“Male, black friends…”
“That, too,” she sighed. She looked at Jen Diaz again. “You should call her…”
“I’ll pass…she’s just not me…”
“Your eyes spoke otherwise…”
“So…you were watching me…”
“A quick glance is more like it…”
Brandon chuckled lowly. “I see…you fool no one, Natalie.”
“I don’t know what you mean, Brandon…”
Brandon sipped from the glass again, smacked his lips, sighed and said, “When you pretend as if you don’t need me…as much as I need you…”
Natalie looked at him then. Yes, as predicted, her heart fell, and the weird pang in her gut returned.
“Yep,” Brandon continued. “It’s almost hilarious to watch.”
He finished off the remains of his glass, studied it for a second, smacked his lips again, and walked away. Natalie watched him place his glass down, reach for Asha on the dance floor, kiss her cheek again, and head towards the door.
Natalie huffed again, feeling a sense of defeat wave over her, and she heard the music again. She hated that it still reminded her of him.
Asha approached her side, dancing a two-step, snapping her fingers, and whispered, “What the he
ll are you still doing here?”
“What are you talking about? I’m at your dinner party…”
“Yes, yes, blah, blah,” Asha began, still dancing. “When will you stop playing around?”
“What?”
“Don’t play stupid, Natalie Chandler,” she said, standing still. “I’ve watched this for weeks. The back and the forth, and the phone calls, and the looks, and your pitiful state of denial. I’m sick of it! If you don’t go out there and get him, then I won’t ever speak to you again. Because letting this one pass will be the dumbest thing you’ll ever do…”
The feeling was a sickening feeling, really…a yearning almost. But she knew something lied with Brandon, knew that she wouldn’t be able to breathe properly again unless she did something about her feelings.
Natalie dashed outside, and caught the lofty figure in black just as he opened the door to his car.
She stood just before the green Explorer, saw him freeze, saw him take his hand off of the door handle and fold his arms across his broad chest.
Everything inside of her hurt, everything mood. She took a deep breath.
“Take me home,” she said.
And he did, and when he stopped in front of her dormitory building, she paused for a moment. She felt his eyes on her, felt the silence swim around them, the unspoken feelings, the tension.
And she sighed, felt the relief wave over her, and she said, “I like you…a lot…”
He only smiled and replied, “I know.”
She kept her eyes away from his.
“I’m not sure,” she continued, her brows furrowed in confusion. “But I think I might love you…”
“As you should,” he said in a low voice, reaching for her hand.
She sighed. “I don’t like it when you look at other girls…”
“I won’t ever do it again…”
“I don’t like being jealous…”
“You’ll never have a need to be…”
“I don’t like arguing…”
“Making up is the greatest…”
“You graduate,” she told him.
“Graduate school, and I’ve got the house…”
“You’re white…and I’m black…”
“Hasn’t stopped us before…”
“You really think that this could work?”
“I love you…”
She looked at him. His smile grew larger. Those three words chilled her.
Clearing her throat, she murmured, "I don't give in easily."
“I like a chase…”
“I’m a virgin…”
“I don’t need it…”
Their foreheads touched. “People will stare…”
“People don’t matter…”
“I hate the music that you listen to…” “We can listen to something you like for a change…”
“Your driving is appalling…”
“I’ll do better,” he assured her.
“Your feet stink…”
“I’ll wash them twice for you…”
Natalie allowed herself to smile. “You really want to be with me?”
Brandon chuckled again. “Always have, Nat…always have…”
Show Me the Sky and a Dragonfly
NATALIE AND ASHA MET UP with the boys at Abby’s on the east side, and after hearing them go on and on about how she and her other brown skinned companion were always late, the girls sat down with them at a small booth in the back, shared a plate of crabs, and as soon as Natalie mentioned something about her birthday fast approaching, she watched her three closest friend’s faces turn.
“Y’all forgot, didn’t you?” Natalie asked them, dropping her butter-smeared napkin on the table, leaning forward. She looked at Brandon.
“Not necessarily,” Asha answered first.
“So, that means that you did?”
“Like she said,” Scotty interjected. “Not necessarily…”
There was a pause. Natalie looked at Brandon, who sat across from her, and watched his eyes slowly move from Scotty, to Asha, then to her. And then a slow grin formed on his face, the same way it did when she was almost certain that that boy was up to something.
Natalie pointed her finger in her boyfriend’s direction. “You. What’s that smile for?”
Brandon quickly changed his expression. “Nothing, baby…I was just thinking of something funny…”
“And you can’t share it?”
“Not this one,” he responded, rolling his lips in.
“So, we keep secrets from each other now?”
“Natalie, calm down,” Brandon said, reaching across the table for her hand.
“It’s not that serious,” Asha assured her, placing a hand on her shoulder.
“Truly isn’t,” Scotty added. “It’s a really silly joke…”
“The worse joke I’ve ever heard,” Brandon said.
Asha made some sort of snorting sound to keep from laughing, and when Natalie looked in her direction, she rolled her lips in, in the same fashion that Brandon had some minutes before.
“Why don’t y’all just tell me what’s going on?”
“What’s the fun in that?” Scotty shrugged.
“Exactly,” Brandon said, reaching for his beer bottle. “If Natalie is patient then she’ll find out soon enough.”
He looked at her, gave her a quick wink, and finished the last of his beer.
“I agree,” Asha said. “The more she’s patient, the better it’ll be for her…”
“Anyway, moving on,” Brandon said as the waitress approached the table, laying a singular check down. “I’d say dancing tonight…”
“But, you can’t dance, so that would be pointless,” Scotty joked, punching Brandon in the arm, Natalie and Asha laughing under their breaths.
Brandon proceeded to reach into his back pocket for his wallet, saying, “I can, too, dance…”
Natalie reached for her purse, but Brandon signaled for her to stop, fanning his brown leather wallet up and down. “Don’t worry about it…”
“I would like to see it,” Asha said. “I bet it’s a sight…”
“Yes, a good one,” Brandon assured them. “Don’t listen to Scotty…he doesn’t know what he’s talking about…”
“I’ll believe the disc jockey,” Natalie told him, replacing her purse beside her in the booth.
“Tallie, you’re supposed to be on my side…”
Natalie felt something soar through her then. For the almost sixth months they’d been together, he’d gotten into the habit of using every variation of her first name, eventually settling on Tallie. Saying it when he wanted to be affectionate, saying it when he was feeling playful, saying it when he was trying to call her from another room, saying it when she was feeling playful, when she wrestled him, punched him, as if to really get her attention, and she’d gotten into the habit of melting each time it came from his mouth.
“You keep secrets,” Natalie said, as they slid out of the booth together. “I don’t take your side…”
Both Asha and Scotty made collaborative “oooh” noises for effect, simultaneously chuckling while Brandon and Natalie looked at each other.
“Will you both quit it?” Brandon told them. “And we can go downtown and I can prove it to you…”
“Brandon, you and I can dance,” Asha told him. “I’m sure I’d give you a nice little whirl around…”
They walked out of the restaurant together, stood on the sidewalk that chilly night in early October, and Natalie stood by Brandon for warmth, who’d shoved his hands in his pockets, resting her head along the blade of his shoulder.
Brandon grinned at Asha’s forwardness as she gave him a playful wink.
Natalie gave her brown friend a cross look. “You watch it, girl…”
“There’s always that new movie that Brandon’s been dying to see,” Scotty suggested.
“If we go to a movie, then Natalie will fall asleep,” Brandon laughed.
Most def
initely. Natalie could fall asleep in the oddest of places.
“Scotty’s just trying to keep you from embarrassing yourself,” Natalie, jokingly remarked, kissing his clothed shoulder.
“You know what? Just for that? We’re going…we’re definitely going…”
“And I thought I’d gotten enough entertainment for the night,” Natalie told him.
“And just for that comment? I’m dancing with Asha…”
“Fine, go ahead,” Natalie said, moving away from him. “I’m dancing with Scotty…all night long…”
Scotty wrapped his arm around Natalie, moved into her, sighed and said, “Ah, fine by me…you know, Nat, I’ve always thought that…you know, you and I…”
“Watch it,” Brandon interrupted, taking Natalie by her hand, giving Scotty a playful shove.
There was a live music venue on Lincoln Avenue called Chevy’s that Scotty suggested. He’d been there before with a couple of his music friends and had loved it, remarking on how open they were with different types of music: fast or slow tempo, rhythm and blues or alternative.
So they went, and Brandon and Scotty made a beeline for the bar while Asha and Natalie found a small, round table to the left of a small stage, with humble, low lighting.
Natalie leaned into the table in between acts and motioned for Asha to come closer so that she could whisper.
“You can tell me now,” Natalie began.
“Tell you what?”
“About the surprise,” she said. “What’s Brandon got?”
“Natalie, I’m not telling you…”
“Is it a good surprise?” Natalie asked.
“Nat, I’m not answering that question…”
“Just answer it,” Natalie pressed. “Is it a good one?”
“Yes, it’s a good one,” Asha said. “I’m surprised that Brandon even came up with it as slow as he is…”
“So, he impressed you?”
“Ain’t that what I said?”
“What can I expect?”
“Natalie…shut up.”
“I bet I can guess,” Natalie said, sitting back, lifting her eyes up in thought. “He thinks that he’s slick, but I’ve got him…”
“No, you don’t…”