“It’ll take three or four hours, but give me your phone number so I can contact you if the estimate changes. I’d rather keep this off the network until everything is finalized. Is it a safe assumption you’re planning a detail for Evangeline?”
Meredith gave Nevada’s king her phone before saying, “She’s been training with them, although I expect a few will be startled to discover she’ll be their permanent principal. In good news, they won’t stress nearly as much as your detail will, Your Highness.”
I scowled, took a page out of Evangeline’s book, and flipped the head of my detail my middle finger. The look Meredith shot me promised retribution in some form at a later time, which I assumed would happen during the stress test she’d see finished come hell or high water.
Eva tossed back her head and cackled. “I’m such a good influence on him.”
“Well, it’s definitely the most casual I’ve ever seen him around RPS agents, so I’m inclined to agree with you.” King Jacques opened the door, a signal to those waiting outside he was ready to begin officially welcoming us to Nevada. “We’re keeping things low-key today, but expect the usual pomp and circumstance tomorrow. They like when we put on a show, and I have a few ideas of how to make both of you shine for the public.”
I groaned. “You’re not going to the long-lost princess route, are you?”
“For your sake as much as hers, yes, I am. And considering the evidence I have, some I’ve gathered myself and some provided by Montana, I’ll be able to weave quite the story for the crowd. You can consider this an early wedding gift.”
Exposing Eva as a princess of any sort would create a frenzy in the media, and once word spread she was marrying me, the frenzy would escalate to pure insanity. The other options, including hiding and becoming a hermit, wouldn’t protect her as well as integrating her into Nevada’s royal family before I publicly claimed her as my wife. “Thank you, Your Majesty.”
“I’ve put your parents in the main guest suite while I’ve made arrangements for you to stay in one of the ambassadorial suites. That’ll give you a little distance from the rest of your family and make it easier to identify if anyone is overly interested in you.” King Jacques led the way into the castle, which I’d always found to be pretentious. The architect had tried to outshine Buckingham Palace, and in some ways, had succeeded, but doing so with a modern flair I expected of Las Vegas.
Inside and out, the place oozed extravagance, making me long for the more practical stone halls of home, built to withstand war rather than display the kingdom’s riches. Did the trappings make the constraints of rulership easier to bear?
I doubted it.
King Jacques fulfilled his duties to my parents first, guiding them to the suite they’d share, slowly dispersing members of my family in the visitor’s wing before taking Eva, Meredith, and I across closer to the administrative wing of the palace. “The suite has two bedrooms, but I expect most will assume you ladies will be staying together. They’ll be corrected soon enough. Evangeline, I’ll have a proper room in the family wing of the palace opened for you, and you can move Prince Kelvin into it at your leisure once the paperwork is signed. Agent Scarson, I expect you’ll enjoy having the ambassadorial suite to yourself.”
“Thank you, Your Majesty.”
I waited for him to leave before debating if I wanted to flop on the couch or attempt to find the nearest bed.
Evangeline linked her arm with mine and pulled me across the room. “Meredith, I’ll get sleepy here vertical, then we can make a game plan. While I expect my uncle means well, let’s not take any chances.”
Amused by her determination to take care of herself and too tired to protest, I went along with her wishes, not that I stood any chance of resisting her. I barely managed to kick off my shoes and plop onto the mattress before my worn body gave up the ghost and clocked out.
“I’m pretty sure he’s done for today,” Eva said, which woke me enough to listen in on the nearby conversation. “I called Dr. Thorton, and he wasn’t surprised. He had some medical term for it, which I couldn’t pronounce if I tried. He said to just leave the Your Highness here to sleep it off and keep tomorrow as quiet as possible.”
“Tomorrow’s going to be anything other than quiet,” King Jacques warned.
I foresaw King Jacques testing Eva’s patience, Eva’s patience snapping, and a brawl breaking out between the pair. “I’m awake.” I rolled over, hit the edge of the bed, and would’ve smacked into the floor if Eva hadn’t intervened.
“You are for now. If Dr. Thorton’s is to be believed, you’ll last an hour before you pass out again. He thought you’d do better, but then you crashed and burned on us.” Eva made me sit on the edge of the bed, where she helped me out of my suit jacket. “I wanted to get you out of that, but you refused to fucking budge, and you weigh a ton for someone so scrawny. It’s all wrinkled now.”
“Sorry, Eva. What did I miss?”
“Your parents had an epic fucking meltdown when my uncle decided he was going to yank custody from my parents and adopt me back into the royal family. You would’ve fucking loved it. Every last one of your mother’s excuses for disliking me, gone in the blink of an eye. Your father melted down because he gets a princess for a daughter-in-law rather than a hooligan. It seems he’d embraced the idea of a hooligan marrying into his family. Honestly, I can’t tell if he was thrilled, disappointed, or both. Meredith recorded it for your enjoyment. Do you think you’re up for dinner? The royal pains in my ass are going to blow gaskets if you’re not up for dinner.”
“I’ll have to be, won’t I? There were no issues with your congress, Your Majesty?”
“There were no issues. I’ve sent copies of the documentation to Montana along with the formalized adoption papers. They’ll take care of the legalities on their end. I’ve already put in a court order and have a warrant out to deal with the fraudulent marriage certificate. However, the supposed groom has requested an audience with me.”
That announcement woke me up, and I removed my tie, tossed it onto the night table, and considered Nevada’s king. “If possible, I want in on that audience.”
“Why?”
“I have it on good authority he’s afraid of birds.”
King Jacques gaped at me. “Pardon?”
Eva snickered. “I’ll get you a change of clothes while you two discuss this.”
When she left, I appreciated the skip in her step. “I’ll probably have to ask my father for some help with the transformation, but I’m of the avian bent. When I inform him he won’t come anywhere near my wife if he wants to enjoy his old age, should he protest, I will give him one good reason to stay away from her.”
“I was going to inform him he was going to be investigated for fraud and attempted enslavement of a child, but I suppose having you witness can be arranged, and if he’s unreasonable about the edict, it’s only natural steps would have to be taken to prove our sincerity. He has a lot to lose pushing me.”
“Eva’s terrified of him,” I whispered, hoping my wife wouldn’t overhear while she hunted for something I could wear in a bid to give me time to talk to Nevada’s king alone.
“Yes. Agent Scarson was astounded. She’s going to look into options, as she’s convinced it’s a form of PTSD. Expect therapy sessions, and you’ll probably be asked to attend to make it easier on her.”
“She wasn’t acting like herself on the tarmac, either.”
“We’re aware. She’ll be fine. The RPS has training in handling situations like this. I recommend approaching North Dakota for general advice. King Adam has a full team helping the royal family. Also, I wanted to mention your kingdom did well by Princess Abigail, especially with the rumors of a potential match between her and Grégoire. An entirely unexpected match, but one worth watching. Your agent has been doing a stellar job at information releases. Sending him to North Dakota was a stroke of brilliance.”
“Was it? I was more thinking he was about to go right off his
rocker, and we’ve always been close to Abby. I missed her entire visit, though.”
“Well, you can visit her and make up for it later. The few times Princess Abigail has been cornered by the media, she’s been with your grandmother and looking happier than anyone has seen her in months. You’re getting the credit for it, as certain elements of the visit were your responsibility before you became ill. I had several physicians check on you while you were resting, by the way. They all came to the same conclusion. I’ll have to plan tomorrow to give you chances to rest between events, but I think we can manage. I’ve been informed my head will be served on a silver platter if I even think about suggesting stimulants, and you’re barred from coffee for the near future.”
“Coffee would result in someone needing to peel me off the ceiling, I’m afraid. They like limiting my coffee intake for some reason. I think I was close to convincing them I really need it to survive.”
Eva laughed from the other room. “I’m so looking forward to when you’re cleared to have coffee again. And you were barred from coffee because you being wired during scenarios would result in even more mayhem than usual.”
“I’m writing into any future contracts I need coffee to put up with scenarios.”
Eva poked her head into the bedroom. “Next, you’re going to ask for sugar, then hell really will break out. You just want to turn the scenarios into a party. Meredith’s still trying to figure out how to get you drunk without you complaining about having to drink.”
“She’ll give me booze but I can’t have coffee? I cry foul.”
Eva tossed a suit bag onto the bed. “Evict the king, get dressed, and come to dinner, you nutter.”
King Jacques chuckled and headed for the door. “If it makes you feel better, dinner is a private affair; we’ll be discussing plans for tomorrow, which will be more formal.”
I could work with a planning session. Nevada’s king closed the door behind him, and I got changed, swallowing several yawns. I emerged from the bedroom with my untied tie dangling over my shoulders, debating if I wanted to bother with it.
Eva pounced, and I lifted my chin so I wouldn’t get in her way.
“Is this a hint I should leave the ties to you?”
With a faint snort, she gave the silk a tug. “We’ll be late if I let you fiddle. You’ll play with that damned tie for an hour until you’re happy with it. I practiced on your herd of relatives to spare us from your fiddling.”
Meredith strode in through the front door, looked up from the papers she read, and chuckled. “Good evening, Your Highness. She was going stir crazy waiting for you to wake up, so I recruited some men to stand still while she learned how to tie ties properly. I’m not going to have to work hard to do a stress test on her. If anything, I’m going to be working hard to make sure she waits until we’re back in Illinois to snap. I’m slightly concerned she’ll attempt to relocate you at her leisure.”
“I’m already plotting how to run away when you start your second stress test, Meredith. I’m obviously going to need a lot of time to plot if I want any hope of escaping your clutches.”
“You’re such a flatterer. How are you feeling?”
“I’m fine. No headache, just tired.”
“Well, I come bearing good news.”
“What good news?”
“Dr. Hampford and Dr. Thorton got into a spat over your fatigue, and after said energetic spat, I’ve been authorized to give you some stimulants to get you through the remainder of the visit. Your Majesty, Dr. Thorton requests you loan him one of your physicians to make certain there are no issues.”
“Of course.”
“I like Dr. Pemland,” Eva said.
“Evangeline, the other physicians aren’t going to bite you or Prince Kelvin, I promise,” King Jacques replied, his tone exasperated. “Dr. Pemland is a pediatrician.”
“Per Dr. Hampford’s instructions, he’ll get to enjoy that cup of coffee he’s been whining about with dinner, and we’ll see how it goes from there. She expects he’ll enter orbit for a few hours and then crash out again for the night. Then we’ll mainline coffee to get through tomorrow. You’re going to be jittery, Your Highness, but jitters are better than the alternatives, and she’d rather not use a prescription stimulant if coffee will suffice.”
As I had everything to lose by disagreeing, I offered Meredith my best smile. “I like coffee.”
“If your wife is done with your tie, you need to review these papers,” Meredith announced.
Eva huffed but released me, making space for the head of my detail. Taking the sheets, I skimmed them to discover I held a copy of Eva’s adoption papers, a certified copy of our marriage certificate, and a letter from King Jacques granting me his permission to marry his niece turned daughter. I arched a brow and pointed the papers at the king. “Cute.”
“If you want the woman, you need my permission. You’re just lucky I like you, or I’d make you work a lot harder for it.”
Eva sighed and bowed her head. “I’m sorry this created so many problems.”
“Eva, you haven’t done anything wrong, although I’m slightly concerned we’ll have to fight off an invasion of new relatives in the near future.”
“We’ll wait until you’re fully recovered before we stage any invasions. Have you put in any thought into your wedding plans?” King Jacques smirked at me.
“Montana is handling the preparations. Or, more accurately, we’re wisely getting out of Queen Mackenzie’s way.”
“Queen Mackenzie is planning your wedding?”
“Your Majesty, a pregnant queen wants to plan our wedding. I’m not brave nor foolish enough to tell her no.”
“She’s really pregnant again?”
“Don’t get me killed spreading the news if they haven’t announced it officially. Please,” I begged.
“Everyone thinks she is anyway, so it’s not a big deal. I’d be more concerned if she wasn’t, as every time I’ve seen them together lately, Her Royal Majesty has been licking her lips and looking at her husband like he’s the most delicious treat she’s ever seen in her life. Now that’s what men should aspire to for their woman, Prince Kelvin. When your woman looks at you like that, you know you’re doing something right.”
Eva’s face turned red.
“I like when mine curses and can kick my ass at her leisure. She need not look at me like I’m the main course.”
“I’m just saying that’s a life goal to work towards, and a good way to figure out if you’re on the right track.”
If Eva’s face reddened any more, I worried she’d drop into a faint, and to spare her from further embarrassment, I tucked the papers under my arm, put my hands on her shoulders, and turned her towards the door. “I think we’re fine. After all, she branded me for her permanent enjoyment the moment she laid eyes on me. I’m sure we can figure it out without having to resort to Montana’s tactics for raising the birth rate of an entire kingdom without help.”
King Jacques chuckled. “It’s a genetic flaw in your family line, Prince Kelvin, and I need a lot of babies to spoil. My other kids refuse to have more than two each.”
“Don’t listen to him, Eva. Monarchs have a basic genetic defect resulting in them becoming overly interested in the private matters of other people. You’ll get used to it. It’ll just become meaningless babble you have to politely tolerate in limited quantity. And when you get tired of it, you’ll just mention someone else who will be having a baby soon, and then everyone’s attention will fixate on them. If you really want the conversation to stop, you’ll mention the latest political drama and start an argument. Sprinkle in a few of your charming curses, I expect people will leave you alone most of the time. I’ll hide behind you, so they’ll leave me alone, too.”
“What have I gotten myself into?” she lamented.
“A royal mess,” I informed her, pushing her through the door.
My parents stared at me with matching expressions of parental disgust and disappointm
ent. “Someone told them about the marriage certificate.”
“You’ve been most thoroughly busted, Your Highness.”
I was going to need a lot more than coffee to get through dinner. “Remember about that whole no alcohol thing?”
“You’re not getting any alcohol, Your Highness. I’m sure you can handle dinner like a mature adult. All you need to do is explain you had just cause to worry about someone coming for her. They’ll understand. They’re just wanting to hear it from you.”
I suspected King Jacques wanted to torture me, as I was directed to sit beside my father. Then, to add insult to injury, he claimed Eva and herded her to the other side of the table. As a consolation prize, Meredith sat beside me.
“What, they don’t have you by the door today?”
“I’ve been forced off duty for dinner, and honestly, I wouldn’t miss this for anything.”
“You’re an evil woman, Meredith.”
She smiled.
As delaying would only add to the misery, I turned to my parents and said, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, but with the risk of someone taking her from me, I wasn’t taking any chances.”
My parents sighed.
“Kiddo, you’re going to give us both gray hairs. I told the congress you were going to get married, not that you were already hitched and whipped.”
“I’m sure the congress can handle my marriage to a freshly minted princess.”
“Now that surprised me. I’d wondered why she knew so much about basic protocols,” my father confessed. “Now I know. No, we’re upset you didn’t tell us, as we’ll have to smooth feathers in Congress, but we’re pleased you can handle your own problems like an adult at least some of the time.”
“Thanks for such a backhanded compliment, Dad.”
“That’s for making us smooth feathers with Congress again.”
“I could go smooth feathers myself. It’d be dictatorial style, but I could do it.”
“That’s exactly why you’re not going to do it. You’re entirely unreasonable when it comes to your newly fledged princess, so let’s keep the internal conflicts to a bare minimum. Nice job picking Montana as your conspirators, however. I’m giving you a full passing grade for that one. I’ve also heard some rumors you’re planning assault while in your shifted form?”
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