When the man sets out on a journey, she should make him swear that he will return quickly, and in his absence should put aside her vows of worshipping the Deity, and should wear no ornaments except those that are lucky. If the time fixed for his return has passed, she should endeavour to ascertain the real time of his return from omens, from the reports of the people, and from the positions of the planets, the moon and the stars. On occasions of amusement, and of auspicious dreams, she should say “Let me be soon united to him.” If, moreover, she feels melancholy, or sees any inauspicious omen, she should perform some rite to appease the Deity.
When the man does return home she should worship the God Kama (i.e., the Indian Cupid), and offer oblations to other Deities, and having caused a pot filled with water to be brought by her friends, she should perform the worship in honour of the crow who eats the offerings which we make to the manes of deceased relations. After the first visit is over she should ask her lover also to perform certain rites, and this he will do if he is sufficiently attached to her.
Now a man is said to be sufficiently attached to a woman when his love is disinterested; when he has the same object in view as his beloved one; when he is quite free from any suspicions on her account; and when he is indifferent to money with regard to her.
Such is the manner of a courtesan living with a man like a wife, and set forth here for the sake of guidance from the rules of Dattaka. What is not laid down here should be practised according to the custom of the people, and the nature of each individual man.
There are also two verses on the subject as follows:
“The extent of the love of women is not known, even to those who are the objects of their affection, on account of its subtlety, and on account of the avarice, and natural intelligence of womankind.”
“Women are hardly ever known in their true light, though they may love men, or become indifferent towards them; may give them delight, or abandon them; or may extract from them all the wealth that they may possess.”
Chapter III—Of the Means of Getting Money; of the Signs of the Change of a Lover’s Feelings, and of the Way to Get Rid of Him
Money is got out of a lover in two ways:
By natural or lawful means, and by artifices. Old authors are of opinion that when a courtesan can get as much money as she wants from her lover, she should not make use of artifice. But Vatsyayana lays down that though she may get some money from him by natural means, yet when she makes use of artifice he gives her doubly more, and therefore artifice should be resorted to for the purpose of extorting money from him at all events.
Now the artifices to be used for getting money from her lover are as follows:
1st—Taking money from him on different occasions, for the purpose of purchasing various articles, such as ornaments, food, drink, flowers, perfumes and cloths, and either not buying them, or getting from him more than their cost.
2nd—Praising his intelligence to his face.
3rd—Pretending to be obliged to make gifts on occasion of festivals connected with vows, trees, gardens, temples, or tanks. 73
4th—Pretending that at the time of going to his house, her jewels have been stolen either by the King’s guards, or by robbers.
5th—Alleging that her property has been destroyed by fire, by the falling of her house, or by the carelessness of her servants.
6th—Pretending to have lost the ornaments of her lover along with her own.
7th—Causing him to hear through other people of the expenses incurred by her in coming to see him.
8th—Contracting debts for the sake of her lover.
9th—Disputing with her mother on account of some expense incurred by her for her lover, and which was not approved of by her mother.
10th—Not going to parties and festivities in the houses of her friends for the want of presents to make to them, she having previously informed her lover of the valuable presents given to her by these very friends.
11th—Not performing certain festive rites under the pretence that she has no money to perform them with.
12th—Engaging artists to do something for her lover.
13th—Entertaining physicians and ministers for the purpose of attaining some object.
14th—Assisting friends and benefactors both on festive occasions, and in misfortune.
15th—Performing household rites.
16th—Having to pay the expenses of the ceremony of marriage of the son of a female friend.
17th—Having to satisfy curious wishes during her state of pregnancy.
18th—Pretending to be ill, and charging her cost of treatment.
19th—Having to remove the troubles of a friend.
20th—Selling some of her ornaments, so as to give her lover a present.
21st—Pretending to sell some of her ornaments, furniture, or cooking utensils to a trader, who has been already tutored how to behave in the matter.
22nd—Having to buy cooking utensils of greater value than those of other people, so that they might be more easily distinguished, and not changed for others of an inferior description.
23rd—Remembering the former favours of her lover, and causing them always to be spoken of by her friends and followers.
24th—Informing her lover of the great gains of other courtesans.
25th—Describing before them, and in the presence of her lover, her own great gains, and making them out to be greater even than theirs, though such may not have been really the case.
26th—Openly opposing her mother when she endeavours to persuade her to take up with men with whom she has been formerly acquainted, on account of the great gains to be got from them.
27th—Lastly, pointing out to her lover the liberality of his rivals.
Thus end the ways and means of getting money.
* * * * *
A woman should always know the state of the mind, of the feelings, and of the disposition of her lover towards her, from the changes of his temper, his manner, and the colour of his face.
The behaviour of a waning lover is as follows:
1st—He gives the woman either less than is wanted, or something else than that which is asked for.
2nd—He keeps her in hopes by promises.
3rd—He pretends to do one thing, and does something else.
4th—He does not fulfil her desires.
5th—He forgets his promises, or does something else than that which he has promised.
6th—He speaks with his own servants in a mysterious way.
7th—He sleeps in some other house under the pretence of having to do something for a friend.
8th—Lastly, he speaks in private with the attendants of a woman with whom he was formerly acquainted.
Now when a courtesan finds that her lover’s disposition towards her is changing, she should get possession of all his best things before he becomes aware of her intentions, and allow a supposed creditor to take them away forcibly from her in satisfaction of some pretended debt. After this, if the lover is rich, and has always behaved well towards her, she should ever treat him with respect; but if he is poor and destitute, she should get rid of him as if she had never been acquainted with him in any way before.
The means of getting rid of a lover are as follows:
1st—Describing the habits and vices of the lover as disagreeable and censurable, with the sneer of the lip, and the stamp of the foot.
2nd—Speaking on a subject with which he is not acquainted.
3rd—Showing no admiration for his learning, and passing a censure upon it.
4th—Putting down his pride.
5th—Seeking the company of men who are superior to him in learning and wisdom.
6th—Showing a disregard for him on all occasions.
7th—Censuring men poss
essed of the same faults as her lover.
8th—Expressing dissatisfaction at the ways and means of enjoyment used by him.
9th—Not giving him her mouth to kiss.
10th—Refusing access to her Jaghana, i.e., the part of the body between the navel and the thighs.
11th—Showing a dislike for the wounds made by his nails and teeth.
12th—Not pressing close up against him at the time when he embraces her.
13th—Keeping her limbs without movement at the time of congress.
14th—Desiring him to employ her when he is fatigued.
15th—Laughing at his attachment to her.
16th—Not responding to his embraces.
17th—Turning away from him when he begins to embrace her.
18th—Pretending to be sleepy.
19th—Going out visiting, or into company, when she perceives his desire to enjoy her during the day time.
20th—Mis-constructing his words.
21st—Laughing without any joke, or at the time of any joke made by him, laughing under some pretence.
22nd—Looking with side glances at her own attendants, and clapping her hands when he says anything.
23rd—Interrupting him in the middle of his stories, and beginning to tell other stories herself.
24th—Reciting his faults and his vices, and declaring them to be incurable.
25th—Saying words to her female attendants calculated to cut the heart of her lover to the quick.
26th—Taking care not to look at him when he comes to her.
27th—Asking him what cannot be granted.
28th—And, after all, finally dismissing him.
There are also two verses on this subject as follows:
“The duty of a courtesan consists in forming connections with suitable men after due and full consideration, and attaching the person with whom she is united to herself; in obtaining wealth from the person who is attached to her, and then dismissing him after she has taken away all his possessions.”
“A courtesan leading in this manner the life of a wife is not troubled with too many lovers, and yet obtains abundance of wealth.”
* * *
73 On the completion of a vow a festival takes place. Some trees such as the Peepul and Banyan trees, are invested with sacred threads like the Brahman’s, and on the occasion of this ceremony a festival is given. In the same way when gardens are made, and tanks or temples built, then also festivals are observed.
Chapter IV—About Reunion With a Former Lover
When a courtesan abandons her present lover after all his wealth is exhausted, she may then consider about her reunion with a former lover. But she should return to him only if he has acquired fresh wealth, or is still wealthy, and if he is still attached to her. And if this man be living at the time with some other women she should consider well before she acts.
Now such a man can only be in one of the six following conditions:
1st—He may have left the first woman of his own accord, and may even have left another woman since then.
Now if the man has left both women of his own accord, he should not be resorted to, on account of the fickleness of his mind, and his indifference to the excellencies of both of them.
2nd—He may have been driven away from both women.
As regards the man who may have been driven away from both women, if he has been driven away from the last one because the woman could get more money from some other man, then he should be resorted to, for if attached to the first woman he would give her more money, through vanity and emulation to spite the other woman. But if he has been driven away by the woman on account of his poverty, or stinginess, he should not then be resorted to.
3rd—He may have left the one woman of his own accord, and be living with another woman.
In the case of the man who may have left the one woman of his own accord, and been driven away by the other, if he agrees to return to the former and give her plenty of money beforehand, then he should be resorted to.
In the case of the man who may have left the one woman of his own accord, and be living with another woman, the former (wishing to take up with him again) should first ascertain if he left her in the first instance in the hope of finding some particular excellence in the other woman, and that not having found any such excellence, he was willing to come back to her, and to give her much money on account of his conduct, and on account of his affection still existing for her.
Or, whether, having discovered many faults in the other woman, he would now see even more excellences in herself than actually exist, and would be prepared to give her much money for these qualities.
Or, lastly, to consider whether he was a weak man, or a man fond of enjoying many women, or one who liked a poor woman, or one who never did anything for the woman that he was with. After maturely considering all these things, she should resort to him or not, according to circumstances.
4—He may have been driven away from the one woman, and left the other of his own accord.
As regards the man who may have been driven away from the one woman, and left the other of his own accord, the former woman (wishing to reunite with him) should first ascertain whether he still has any affection for her, and would consequently spend much money upon her; or whether, being attached to her excellent qualities, he did not take delight in any other women; or whether, being driven away from her formerly before completely satisfying his sexual desires, he wished to get back to her, so as to be revenged for the injury done to him; or whether he wished to create confidence in her mind, and then take back from her the wealth which she formerly took from him, and finally destroy her; or, lastly, whether he wished first to separate her from her present lover, and then to break away from her himself. If, after considering all these things, she is of opinion that his intentions are really pure and honest, she can reunite herself with him. But if his mind be at all tainted with evil intentions, he should be avoided.
5th—He may have been driven away by the one woman, and may be living with another.
In the case of the man who may have been driven away by one woman, and be living with another, if the man makes overtures in return to the first one, the courtesan should consider well before she acts, and while the other woman is engaged in attracting him to herself, she should try in her turn (through keeping herself behind the scenes) to gain him over, on the grounds of any of the following considerations:
1st—That he was driven away unjustly and for no proper reason, and now that he has gone to another woman, every effort must be used to bring him back to myself.
2nd—That if he were once to converse with me again, he would break away from the other woman.
3rd—That the pride of my present lover would be put down by means of the former one.
4th—That he has become wealthy, has secured a higher position, and holds a place of authority under the King.
5th—That he is separate from his wife.
6th—That he is now independent.
7th—That he lives apart from his father, or brother.
8th—That by making peace with him I shall be able to get hold of a very rich man, who is now prevented from coming to me by my present lover.
9th—That as he is not respected by his wife, I shall now be able to separate him from her.
10th—That the friend of this man loves my rival, who hates me cordially; I shall, therefore, by this means separate the friend from his mistress.
11th—And lastly, I shall bring discredit upon him by bringing him back to me, thus showing the fickleness of his mind.
When a courtesan is resolved to take up again with a former lover, her Pithamurda and other servants should tell him that his former expulsion from the woman’s house was caused by the wickedness of her mother; that the
woman loved him just as much as ever at that time, but could not help the occurrence on account of her deference to her mother’s will; that she hated the union of her present lover, and disliked him excessively. In addition to this, they should create confidence in his mind by speaking to him of her former love for him, and should allude to the mark of that love that she has ever remembered. This mark of her love should be connected with some kind of pleasure that may have been practised by him, such as his way of kissing her, or manner of having connection with her.
Thus end the ways of bringing about a reunion with a former lover.
When a woman has to choose between two lovers, one of whom was formerly united with her, while the other is a stranger, the Acharyas (sages) are of opinion that the first one is preferable, because his disposition and character being already known by previous careful observation, he can be easily pleased and satisfied; but Vatsyayana thinks that a former lover, having already spent a great deal of his wealth, is not able or willing to give much money again, and is not, therefore, to be relied upon so much as a stranger. Particular cases may, however, arise differing from this general rule on account of the different natures of men.
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