When the servant came to escort Sivar to dinner, Kaori was all too happy to see him go. She couldn’t tolerate another minute of his watchful gaze. The only person whose company she desired was Therek. She wanted to know if the courier had been sent. Fear continued to grip her heart at the thought of her parents returning to Rothdara. Therek’s words echoed through her head, a constant reminder of how dangerous the situation was. Your parents are more likely to face execution. He had to be wrong. It was barbaric to slaughter an innocent person for the crimes of another. Although she was frightened at the prospect of facing death herself, the guilt of bringing such a fate upon her parents would eat away at her inside until she went completely mad. She would rather die than allow her parents to take the blame.
Deep in thought, she missed the sound of the door opening, cracked only slightly to allow the visitor to slip inside. The movement caught her eye first, drawing her attention to see Therek’s muscular form standing in the entrance of the room. He’d come. She didn’t care how he managed to break away from the others. The important thing was that he was there.
“You have finished eating already?” she asked calmly, struggling to suppress the anxiety which threatened to overtake her. It took all her strength to keep from jumping out of the bed and shaking him to obtain the information she sought. But she couldn’t do that. Her behavior toward Therek was questionable already. The best approach was to remain calm and not risk sparking his ire.
Therek’s eyes swept the room as if looking for something. His countenance remained stern. Solemn. Kaori doubted the man would know how to smile if the compulsion struck. “I have not had time to find my way to the dining hall. And you? I ordered a tray brought yet I do not see one.”
“No one has been here since my brother was called for dinner.”
“I shall have to rectify that.”
As he turned to face the door, Kaori’s voice rang out louder than she intended, her cheeks flushing with warmth at the outburst. She didn’t want him to go. There were still questions to be answered. He couldn’t possibly think to leave her without some word. “Do not go yet,” she pleaded, lowering her tone before continuing. “I am not particularly hungry. Perhaps you could enlighten me on the progress of our plan before you chastise the servants.”
Stoic and still, Therek paused, his hand resting lightly over the doorknob. Pensive, he slowly lifted his head, twisting to glance over his shoulder toward the bed. “Ah, yes,” he mumbled, more to himself than anyone else. “I nearly forgot.”
“I assumed that was the reason you came,” Kaori relaxed somewhat into the mattress. “Or did you come all this way to verify that I was eating?”
There was no change in Therek’s expression, his eyes staring at her as if not registering what she was saying. He seemed distracted by something. Kaori watched the glow of his eyes intently, searching for a sign that he’d heard her question. She thought to speak again when he finally broke the silence, his arm rising to gesture toward her foot. “How are you feeling?”
“I beg your pardon?” What a strange question to ask! “My condition has nothing to do with whether or not your courier has been sent to retrieve my parents. I must know if they will be alright.”
“My courier left over an hour ago,” Therek responded sharply. “By the time your parents are intercepted, it will be late. I expect they will take a room at an inn for the night and find their way to Siundel in the morning…” His voice faded, shifting to stare down at the blankets where Kaori’s injured foot remained covered. “You and your brother are welcome to stay here this evening. It would be best that you not attempt much walking while the sutures are fresh.”
His offer sounded forced. Etiquette required him to provide lodging though his aloof nature made it obvious that he wasn’t accustomed to long-term guests at his home. “I will not fall apart between here and my uncle’s house – but I thank you for the strained gesture of kindness.”
“Strained? You mistake my tone, Milady,” he shook his head, exhaling a heavy breath. “I do not often have guests at my home; even less often being those of the female persuasion. Your injury, however, is my fault and I cannot simply turn you out. My hesitance lies in your reputation if word spread of my offer, not in my lack of desire to provide hospitality.”
“If you are so concerned about my reputation, why do you offer at all?”
“Because the presence of your brother would dissuade the rumors which would abound. In addition, I can extend the invitation to Lord Tialore and Lady Endeli. You need only tell me if your preference is to stay.”
It was tempting. The bed was far more luxurious than the one provided by her uncle, the blankets warm and inviting, scented by some sweet fragrance which soothed her senses. One night couldn’t be so bad… No. She couldn’t. Her parents would no doubt go to Mudel’s home before they sought Therek. If she wasn’t there when they arrived, they would be worried. “I appreciate the offer, but I cannot stay,” she replied, consciously making an effort to soften her voice. Too often she spoke to Therek with anger and contempt. There was no reason to treat him so poorly. In truth, she wasn’t entirely certain why she did. “My brother can help me to our chaise after dinner. We should not trouble you beyond what we already have.”
With a decisive nod Therek started to turn away, pausing suddenly, his angular features somehow managing to deepen the thoughtful expression on his face. “You are an odd girl,” he remarked, surprising Kaori with the abruptness. “You fight soldiers, fire arrows, and show no pain when wounded. Tell me… would you admit to feeling discomfort currently if I was to inquire again on your well-being; or would you continue to deny it?”
“Would you believe me if I truly felt none?” she challenged. Catching herself slipping into her usual harshness she gave a soft sigh, rolling her head on the pillow to look Therek in the eye. “I am quite alright.” A lie. She knew there was no reason for dishonesty about her injury but she couldn’t help it. There was something about Therek which made her unwilling to let him see weakness. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that he presented himself with such strength. She feared he would lose what little respect he had for her if she couldn’t show him the same.
“If you insist,” he nodded, twisting the doorknob with a crisp click. “I would like to pay you a visit after your family has settled in Mialan – if that is acceptable to you?”
“I… yes.” She stammered. She wasn’t sure how to respond. His words could hold so many meanings. The last thing she wanted was to misconstrue his intentions. “You claim a long standing friendship with my parents. What makes you think I would deny you to visit them?”
“I was not asking your permission to visit your parents.”
“Then why did you ask if it was acceptable?”
“Because my intention was to visit you.”
Shock sent her into stunned silence. Her? He barely knew her and their time together had been spent in the most peculiar fashion. She’d done nothing which could possibly have sparked his interest romantically. Even if she had, it was nonsensical to consider a marriage between him – or any other man in Carpaen – given the direction her life had taken. No respectable Vor’shai would ever ask for her hand now. She would be labeled a criminal. Denied the chance of ever returning to her home in Rothdara. Her family would lose their rank, their title, their land. They would lose everything… because of her.
After several moments of silence Kaori became aware of Therek’s presence, lingering at the door in wait of her response. What should she say? She doubted it was appropriate for a man of his position to associate with criminals. He placed himself at risk by ever speaking to her again. “I am not certain that would be wise, Your Grace,” she said softly, chiding herself for turning him away. She only hoped he would understand it was in his best interest to stay as far from her as possible.
Without a word Therek stepped through the door, drawing it closed behind him to leave Kaori alone once again. She stared after h
im, willing him to come back, if only for a moment longer. Enough time for her to apologize and explain her reasons for denying him. But it was too late. Probably for the best. Once she was in Mialan, he was sure to forget about her. The slight he suffered at her rejection would be nothing more than a fleeting memory after Pehrona found a way to attach herself to the Avishul dukedom. As far as Kaori was concerned, she would never see Therek again after today. And good riddance. A life without him had been her desire from the start.
Kaori’s heart beat steadily against her chest, anxiety causing it to palpitate rapidly whenever she allowed her thoughts to drift to her parents. Seated on the sofa in her uncle’s sitting room she’d watched the sun rise that morning, gradually making its way overhead before slipping lower to begin its descent toward evening. Where were her parents? They should have returned before noon. The courier couldn’t have been very far behind them, unless something prevented him from making up the distance. A single horse was more than capable of covering ground faster than a carriage drawn at a leisurely pace. The courier should have crossed their path in Voiene, or perhaps when they sought a room for the night in Kisina before passing through Tialore.
Relax. If the courier hadn’t reached her parents until Kisina, their return to Siundel would be delayed by several hours. It would be nightfall by the time they reached the city. The anticipation was driving her mad.
In her peripheral vision Kaori was aware of Sivar sitting across the small room, watching her, clearly curious about something. He’d been acting strangely since they left Therek’s home the evening before. Throughout the ride to their uncle’s house Sivar looked upon her with the same questioning gaze, never saying anything to direct his curiosity, merely examining her face, her eyes, searching for… something. She could only assume it had to do with the unusual chain of events which transpired while in Therek’s company.
“What are you doing, Kaori?”
She didn’t hear the question at first. When it registered, she had to wonder if she’d heard him correctly. It didn’t make sense. She wasn’t doing anything. “I do not understand.”
“Do not play innocent,” he sighed, leaning forward in his chair to rest his elbows on his knees. “Your behavior the last couple days has my head spinning – trying to figure out what you are up to with the Duke.”
“I am not up to anything with the Duke,” she breathed, exasperated by the implications, afraid that Sivar had somehow seen the truth written in her eyes.
Shaking his head, Sivar settled a stern gaze on Kaori. “You must think me a fool if you believe I wouldn’t pick up on your games. It was easy enough to look past at the ball but you made your intentions more obvious while on our ride yesterday.” Rigid, Sivar straightened his back, clasping his hands tightly in his lap. “You are better with horses than any woman I know. Whatever startled yours yesterday should not have been enough to create the scene you caused. We looked everywhere and found no sign of you or the Duke, other than your abandoned horses… yet we know the two of you were together. That is the only detail which is obvious.”
“Nothing is obvious. You assume much.”
“I assume nothing. I know.” Craning his neck, Sivar searched the room, making sure no one else was nearby to overhear their conversation. “What are you hiding, Kaori? One minute you insist I not introduce you to the Duke and the next you are finding ways to slip away with him. Do you have any idea what that makes me think?”
“Whatever you are thinking, it is wrong.” She didn’t want to discuss this right now. Her nerves were frayed enough as it was without having to explain everything to Sivar. He would be so angry! If her parents left Carpaen, he would be taken away with them, torn from the social circle he’d ingratiated himself in over the years. It would crush him. “You worry too much. It is a beautiful day. Why do you not go out and enjoy it?”
“I am not going anywhere until I figure out what is going on. You are hiding something from me.”
“What makes you think I am hiding anything?”
“I know you, Kaori. Not to mention your odd disinclination toward being introduced to the Duke made it difficult to ignore. That was perhaps my first clue. So why don’t we start there,” he nodded decisively. “What made you so hesitant to make the Duke’s acquaintance?”
Why would he not let it go? He would have his answers soon enough. Kaori preferred that he hear the truth from their parents rather than from her. Therek would be able to explain things in a way which would sound less improper. No matter what she told Sivar, he would assume the worst. Her family seemed to have little faith in her ability to conduct herself appropriately. “He is a powerful man. Can a woman not simply be overwhelmed at the thought of being in his company?”
“No,” Sivar stated bluntly. “Nervousness is one thing, but you begged me not to introduce you. That implies that you had some reason not to speak with him.”
“You are mistaken. I begged you not to make me speak with Lord Torust –”
“Whom you clearly believed to be the Duke.”
Damn! Why did he have to be so observant? “I told you at the ball that it was nothing.”
“You said it was complicated. There is a difference.”
He had her backed into a corner. There was no way to get around his questions without being able to get up and walk out of the room and her current condition made that impossible. She had no choice than to tell him. But how? She didn’t fully understand the events herself.
Reaching into the folds of her neckline she pulled the familiar handkerchief from under the lace, tossing it down to the floor between her and Sivar. A bit dramatic, perhaps, but it was enough to catch his attention. Unable to restrain his curiosity, Sivar leaned forward, plucking the piece of fabric from the ground, his eyes opening wide in shock to discover the initials embroidered there. “This is the Duke’s…”
“Yes, I know that now,” Kaori exhaled. “When you brought my attention to the Duke at the ball, I recognized him as the man who gave me the handkerchief, but I was not aware of his name prior to that night. I knew nothing of his rank. When you spoke of Lord Torust, I mistakenly attributed the initials of his name to be those sewn into the fabric, therefore believing Liurn to be the man who gave me the trinket. That is where the confusion spawned.”
“That still says nothing of how you crossed paths with the Duke. Why did he give you this?” Sivar waved the handkerchief absently.
Covering her face with her hands, Kaori tried to calm her crashing thoughts. Everything about the night she met Therek remained a haze in her mind. Both she and Therek had gone through such great lengths to conceal the truth of their meeting and now here she sat, preparing to unravel it all. “You recall the Duke’s riding accident while visiting Rothdara a few months ago?” It seemed as good a place to start as any. One of the first lies sparked by their secrets.
Sivar paused, pondering the question before nodding in affirmation. “Yes. He took a nasty spill off his horse… wait. You… are you what spooked his horse on the road that night?”
“Not exactly.” She was trembling. The thought of admitting her actions was almost as terrifying as the thought of what was to come of them. “The Duke did not fall from his horse. The injury he suffered was at my hand.”
Kaori realized her mistake too late, grimacing at the thought of how her words must sound to Sivar. The look on his face was enough to tell her that he interpreted the explanation just as she feared. “You struck him? Did he… Kaori, did he do something to you? Did the Duke lay his hands on you in some way?”
“No, it is not like that,” she sat up on the sofa, gazing at Sivar in desperation, praying he would calm himself and allow her to finish the explanation. At the sight of her pleading eyes Sivar leaned back in his chair, mouth closed, his protests quickly falling silent. Content that he was listening she pressed on. “Our parents were having guests that night so I decided to go for a walk to stay out of the way. I went a bit further than planned and found myself o
ut long after dark.” Averting her eyes she pressed her lips together, struggling over the words. At the memory of the soldiers she could feel her anger rising, reminded of the hatred she felt for those men. “While attempting to find my way home, a carriage happened by, escorted by General Deliao and a few of his men. The General directed the carriage onward and left two of his soldiers to see me home. Except… I do not believe their intention was to take me anywhere.”
Wide-eyed, Sivar stared at her, speechless. Kaori couldn’t blame him. She’d witnessed the behavior of the soldiers and the truth continued to shock her to this day. Still, he said nothing. Waiting. Afraid of what she would say next.
“One of the soldiers grabbed me and tried to force me into the woods. When I started to struggle, the other came to his aid. I panicked. I could not simply accept what they were doing so I fought back. I remember very little about the fight other than that I did not know anyone had come to my rescue until my fist struck the Duke in my distraction. One of the soldiers had caused injury to my hand and the Duke offered me his handkerchief to try and clean the blood away.”
“How can that be? I would have noticed an injury of that degree.”
“Why do you think I fell down the stairs? I knew I had to do something to cover the truth so I did the first thing I could think of which would divert suspicion. The only person who knew the actual cause of my injuries was the Duke and I insisted that he and I never see one another again after that night. So you can imagine my uncertainty in being faced with him.”
“If he agreed to never see you again, why did he invite you to the ball?”
This wasn’t getting any easier. Somehow she’d convinced herself that once the story started to come out, it would flow with less hesitation. Less fear. Instead Kaori felt her emotions increasing, nearly sending her into a fit of tears to think of admitting to Sivar what was to become of their parents. Seeing her fragile emotional state, Sivar rose from his chair, swiftly covering the room to sit next to her on the sofa. His arm rested over her shoulders, drawing her to him in a comforting embrace. She could hear him whispering to her. Everything was going to be okay. She could trust him. But nothing was going to be okay. Never again.
The Myatheira Chronicles: Volume Four: In the Beginning Page 12