“You don’t understand,” Kaori breathed, finding it hard to think through the fear which crept further over her. “Therek told me these things in confidence. If he finds that I told anyone, he may never speak to me again.”
“Relax Kaori. If you are that concerned about it, I will find a way to express my disapproval without mention of Lady Orith.” Straightening the buttons on his doublet, Liurn cast a final glance out over the water, his head bobbing up and down in what looked to be a nod of approval at something only he could see. “When we reach Carpaen, I will speak with him. Until then, try not to think of it. There are plenty of other things which require your immediate attention. Stay focused on the war and leave Therek to me.”
“I…” Kaori’s protest fell on deaf ears as Liurn turned to walk away, his head held high in a display of absolute pride. She didn’t know whether to feel grateful or offended by his insistence on helping with her personal affairs. Liurn didn’t need to be involved. This mess was hers to clean up yet she knew Liurn would never listen. Once he had his mind set on something, there was no changing it. The best thing to do was to let him do what he wanted. What was the worst that could happen? Her friendship with Therek already hung by a thread. It didn’t seem likely that it could get much worse unless the men resorted to violence. But Therek wouldn’t let that happen. She only hoped Liurn wouldn’t do anything stupid which might get himself hurt. Therek might not strike first, but if Liurn turned hostile, there was no way to know how it would end. If she had to bet, however, her money would be on Therek. Sarid, please let them keep their weapons sheathed; she thought desperately, gazing up into the brilliant light of the afternoon sky. She couldn’t change the course Liurn set out to take. At this point, there was nothing left for her to do but pray.
It took longer to reach the meeting point than Kaori expected, the days feeling like years as she crossed through the mountains in the northern regions of Carpaen. Therek set up a base on the outskirts of Avesian, a small village just south of the Ethrystan border. A strategic location which allowed the Namiren troops to arrange camp nearby, passing into Ovatai territory to avoid notice from the Imperial Army. It was a risk if the powerful inhabitants of Ethrysta became aware of the intrusion, but to this point they had managed to go unnoticed, waiting for the arrival of the final ship from Namorea.
Throughout the journey Kaori found herself in awe over the size of the country she had called home her entire life. From the warmth and safety of the Levadis estate in Rothdara she never realized just how large Carpaen was. Maneuvering cautiously along the outer reaches and through the mountains she received a firsthand tour of the expansive land mass, more than a week passing before she heard Liurn give word to their company that they were within a day’s reach of their destination. She was tired. Hot. Caked with dirt and sweat from the array of temperatures they passed through to get where they were. To the north the climate was much cooler than she was accustomed to, grateful for the thick fabric of the trousers she wore to protect her legs while atop her horse. She longed for the warmer air to the south but she knew it was necessary to stay as far from Eykanua as possible.
As the village came into view she felt her heart begin to race uncomfortably, reminded of the anxiety she fought to push down at the thought of seeing Therek again. He was so close. Somewhere within the tents of the makeshift base. She could almost smell his cologne on the air, inhaling deeply as if it would somehow direct her to him. But there was nothing. The scent was all in her mind, brought into reality by nothing more than her imagination playing games with her heart.
Overcome with a sudden disinclination to ride any further Kaori pulled back on the reins to bring her horse to a halt, swinging her leg over the side and down to the ground before Liurn could give the word that they had arrived. Her legs ached, circulation hindered from the long journey, knees stiff and shaky. Hands gripped over the saddle she tried to gain control over her balance enough to stand up straight, waiting for the uncomfortable tingling sensation in her legs to cease before she chanced letting go of her support. Her image in front of these men and women was important. She couldn’t very well wander out in front of them and collapse in a heap from exhaustion. They had to think her strong. Powerful. Unafraid of what was to come.
It was all a lie. Image was everything, working to protect the secret that she was, in fact, scared to death of what they were getting themselves into. Although the title had begun to feel more natural, it didn’t change the fact that she was no Queen. It wasn’t in her blood to rule over anyone. Nor was it within her abilities to lead an entire army into battle. When she felt fear start to creep over her, she had to remind herself that it wasn’t entirely on her shoulders. Therek was the one who accepted the task of organizing the military. Every decision made for the attack would be brought to Kaori’s attention to finalize, but the tactics were in Therek’s hands to determine. She took mild comfort in knowing that he could be trusted with that responsibility. Over the past year he’d proven himself more than capable of planning offensive and defensive strategies. Their people wouldn’t have made it as far as they had without him.
“Your Majesty,” Ramis’s voice called out from across the camp, drawing Kaori’s attention to where he made his way through the tents to greet her. Nausea threatened her with sickness to see Therek by his side, almost seeming to glide across the ground with his long, smooth, graceful strides, bringing him to stand in front of Kaori with nothing more than a sharp nod.
“Ambassador,” Kaori gave a short bow, foregoing the usual curtsy expected of a lady. She wasn’t dressed for feminine formalities. Right now business was more important than etiquette. “I am pleased to see everyone made it safely. The journey was far more treacherous than I thought.”
“Yes, the waters of the Nahpoa are not the friendliest, but they are nothing compared to the Vai’ld Sea to the south of Palinon. Be grateful we did not have to cross their murky depths to reach this place.”
“I am grateful for a number of things which I cannot even begin to list,” Kaori gave a gracious smile. The journey had been tedious but she knew Ramis was right. It could have been far worse. In truth, she was worried things had gone too smoothly. Their luck was too great. It didn’t bode well for the future. “How goes the training? Do we have at least a few qualified soldiers among our ranks?”
Ramis laughed at her question, seeming in better spirits than Kaori expected. “Your people learn quickly when their lives are at stake. Your general’s ability to bring the best out of his soldiers is remarkable. We may have a chance yet.”
At mention of Therek, Kaori’s eyes reflexively lifted to observe the man they spoke of, her pulse racing, reminded of how close he was. He had a rugged look about him, his hair windblown and tangled from his time outdoors. She drew in a breath at the sight of him, surprised to realize just how long it had been since she’d seen him last. Aside from the fateful night of the meeting in Namorea she fought so hard to forget, it had been months since last they were in each other’s company. If not for the prim and proper façade she was required to put on for the sake of her newfound title, she would have greeted him far more warmly than she was able to in that moment, her smile wavering to see the stern expression upon Therek’s face in return. He revealed no happiness to see her, his greeting nothing more than a quick, barely noticeable nod of his head. Detached, even for him.
“We better have more than a mere chance,” Therek responded to Ramis’s lighthearted jest, his lips never breaking the perfectly straight line they formed, emotionless and blank. It pained Kaori to see him so unusually stern. Hardened. His demeanor had always been solemn and serious, but this was beyond anything she’d seen in him before.
Desperate to break the ice between them Kaori took a step forward, shoulders back, chin held high in a believable display of confidence, hoping Therek wouldn’t notice the discomfort in her eyes. “Have you determined who will join the ranks of command?”
“A few.” His response
was oddly swift, the glow of his eyes brightening somewhat to hear Kaori’s voice directed toward him. “For an Esai, Davian Torust has proven a worthy leader. Courageous. Intelligent. Clever. I feel he will make a strong addition as commander. With his assistance, we chose a human by the name of Trayton Henrald who showed potential to represent the humans among our command while Davian requested the lady, Nichele Evantine, as his lieutenant.”
“If I may make a suggestion as well,” Ramis cut in, a long, slender finger motioning in the direction of the tents. “There is a Ven’shal woman within my recruits who has demonstrated impeccable skill with a sword. The others follow her direction already without title. It was my intention to present her name as a candidate for commander.”
Kaori pondered the idea, curious of the woman Ramis spoke of. A Ven’shal? She had little knowledge of their people, though she knew they possessed similar abilities to those of the Vor’shai. It was rumored they were more skilled with the internal energy, though they utilized it in a different fashion. Darker. Less accepted by society. They tended to remain out of sight from the general public of Carpaen because of their questionable practices and unwillingness to conform to the lifestyle of the humans. In a way she was intrigued by the thought of including one of their race within the ranks of command. It could prove beneficial if their magic was as strong as the stories claimed. “You have my attention,” she nodded to Ramis with a faint smile. “What is this woman’s name?”
“Calynne Irvela,” he stated proudly. “We can stage a demonstration of skill if you desire to see her in action. I assure you it would be quite a treat.”
“I am not certain we have time for festivities. Does Captain Ugaro agree with your evaluation of her ability to lead?”
“He was the one who first brought her to my attention.”
“Then I am inclined to trust your opinion. Ghal is experienced in military affairs. If he feels she is capable of performing the duties required of a command officer, I will not argue. Let it be done, but quickly. We should begin preparations for our charge on Eykanua soon.”
Ramis gave a sharp nod of agreement, turning his gaze to Therek briefly before settling it on Kaori once again. “Are there any others you wish to include among the ranks of command, Your Majesty?”
“I know nothing of the skill possessed by those outside my own people,” she frowned. There were many whom she desired to present with something in recognition of their service throughout the rebellion. Their current mix of races was ideal in providing leaders from every culture in their midst though she found it unfortunate that the decision was to avoid further promotion within the Vor’shai.
An amused chuckle could be heard from Ramis at her statement, his hand reaching out to clasp firmly over Kaori’s shoulder. “You are Queen, Kaori. If there is someone to which you wish to grant a title, that is your right.”
Queen. Yes, that detail did tend to slip her mind. From the day she first heard it used in reference to herself, she’d given little thought to what that meant in regards to her authority. So many people were quick to offer their opinions and suggestions and she was so afraid of making a misstep that she never considered the possibility of going against them. “Koyl Enlim,” she stated without hesitation or question. He was a strong fighter and had placed his life on the line more than once throughout his time with the rebellion. His loyalty deserved recognition. “Have him placed as a lieutenant under the command of Lady Irvela.”
“That’s more like it,” Ramis smirked. “Now you are starting to sound like a queen.”
Pride washed over her at Ramis’s approval. It was foolish to desire such compliments yet she couldn’t deny the boost in confidence it gave when someone of rank told her she was doing something right. Authority of this level was foreign to her. Over time she prayed the desire to please everyone would dissolve but currently it hindered her ability to make the decisions she knew needed to be made. She feared becoming the monster Sulel had transformed into upon placing the crown atop his head. You’re not Sulel. It was a simple fact. Undeniable. Even at her worst, she didn’t believe it possible to sink so low.
Not wanting to make her satisfaction noticeable to the men, Kaori suppressed a smile, waving a hand toward the tents to direct Therek and Ramis onward. “Shall we gather our commanding officers? There is much left to be discussed before we march south.”
“Shall we?” Therek’s brow rose quizzically. His questioning gaze left Kaori uneasy, glancing between him and Ramis to find them both looking equally curious by her request. Nervously, she began to wring her hands together, unsure why the men stared at her in that way. Had she done something wrong? Frantic, she went over her previous statement in her mind, the sound of Therek’s laughter nearly causing her to faint from humiliation at being the source of whatever joke passed unspoken between the men. “Do not ask our permission, Your Majesty. If you wish to gather our men and women, you must simply direct us to do so.”
“Oh…” She wanted to crawl behind one of the tents and hide, blood rising to her cheeks in a rush of heat. She had done it again. Fumbling over her role as royalty. Giving orders was going to take some time getting used to. “Well, then,” she swallowed hard, straining to regain the steadiness of her voice. Confidence was key. Without it, no one would put their faith in her as their Queen. “Have the commanding officers brought to a location where we can speak in private. Our plans must be finalized before morning, so make sure they are prepared. This could be a very long night.”
Seated behind a makeshift table, Kaori clasped her hands lightly over the rough wooden surface, posture erect in attempts to give an image of pride and confidence. Inside, she was far from prepared for what she was about to undertake. Between the war and her issues with Therek, she was ready to scream in frustration and fear – and she was about to face them both at the same time.
Her earlier meeting with Therek had been less painful than expected. Given the way they left each other in Namorea, she’d been prepared for worse. Therek had every right to be angry with her. She treated him with incredible disregard and deserved every bit of his hatred. And when he first approached her at the camp, he played the part convincingly. His demeanor had been harsh, keeping his interaction short and to the point. But by the end he had begun to release some of the tension. She noticed it immediately upon her decision to address him directly in the conversation. It made her wonder if he wasn’t as angry as she feared. Perhaps he shared a similar fear to that which she felt. Concern at the possibility that she remained upset with him. His final words in Namorea were far from hateful. On the contrary, they had been an expression of love. Heartfelt. Genuine. Vulnerable... He had opened his heart to her in a way she’d never seen him do with anyone before.
If that was true, it would make things easier. Therek’s lack of aggression may not prove an absence of animosity toward her, but it would at least give the impression of unity for the sake of the others. At the same time, it would help Kaori convince herself there was nothing wrong between them so she could proceed with the planning without the added stress of sensing the tension which had been so obvious throughout their time in Namorea.
Eyes locked on the entrance of the tent, she awaited the arrival of the others. Liurn stood next to the flap, his expression stern as he peered out into the camp. Watching him intently, Kaori’s mind began to wander once again, curious if he’d spoken with Therek since arriving in Avesian. It had taken some time to tie off the horses and settle into their chosen quarters before word was sent to the appointed command officers of the meeting. Throughout the afternoon Kaori lost track of the men, distracted by the people who came to see her, showering her with praise and affection for helping them stand up to Sulel. It was surreal to see just how many Vor’shai looked up to her. Respected her. They were loyal. Grateful to serve under her. Kaori’s mind swam at the realization that these people truly believed her to be their Queen. With every man and woman who approached, she felt the tears threatening to show
on her lashes to think how much she meant to them. The symbol she now stood for in the eyes of the Vor’shai. It hardened her resolve to take down General Deliao and his men. To defeat Sulel and end his tyranny over Carpaen. She only hoped the desire for freedom was enough to make her people fight better than the trained soldiers they would find themselves up against in Eykanua.
A rustle of fabric pulled Kaori from her reverie, sitting back in her chair as the tent flap opened to reveal Therek’s face. The very sight of him sent her heart into an uncomfortable rhythm, a wash of dizziness causing her to sway slightly. He looked handsome in his heavy doublet, the design bringing with it a sense of familiarity that Kaori couldn’t quite place at first. Something about it filled her with dread, afraid to remember why the garment aroused such fear in her heart.
There was no time to dwell on it before Ramis and Captain Ugaro entered behind him, both dressed in similar fashion to that which Therek wore though accented with symbols to represent their rank within the Namiren military. Distracted by her thoughts, Kaori rose to her feet in greeting, a strained smile crossing her lips as she tried to fight the discomfort which filled every corner of her heart. “Gentlemen. It is a pleasure.”
“The pleasure is all ours,” Ramis gave a sweeping bow before her in an ostentatious display more fitting for the local theater than a military command gathering. “I hope you do not mind that we took the liberty of designing uniforms for your Royal Army. Supplies were limited, but we were able to arrange doublets for majority of the men and women who will take to the battlefield.”
“That was very thoughtful of you,” Kaori let her eyes stray to Therek once again, taking a moment to examine the details of the uniform he wore. Golden cord accented the sleeves and hem, matching the perfectly polished buttons which adorned the front. On the right side of his chest she could see what looked to be a crest of some sort, her hand rising to rest just above her breast at the sight of it, the beat of her heart increasing until she feared it might burst forth onto the ground at her feet. “What… is that?” she questioned. Her voice trembled, belying the calm exterior she tried to uphold.
The Myatheira Chronicles: Volume Four: In the Beginning Page 78