“It wasn’t a problem at all. My kids will always be welcomed in my home.”
I stared up at him for a few seconds before hugging him again. “Does that mean I can call you Pops, too?”
“Of course.” He released me and took a step back. “If I never said it, thank you, for everything you did for Benjamin.”
I looked over at Benji and smiled. “It was my pleasure.”
Once everyone else said their goodbyes, Benji stepped up for his turn, chewing on his lower lip. He held my waist and lifted me onto one of the chairs so we were eye to eye. Pulling me near, he brushed my lips with a kiss then buried his face in my shoulder and spoke against it. “Don’t go.”
I leaned back my head and searched over his face. One of his tears had finally broken free and snaked its way down his face. “What did you say?”
His mouth opened, and then closed again. “Nothing.” He pecked my lips then pressed his forehead to mine. “I’m proud of you for fulfilling your dream. You’re so strong and determined. That’s one of the things I love most about you.”
I hugged his neck tight, fighting my own tears. “I love you, too.”
He leaned his head back with a smile spread across his face. “You gonna miss me?”
I gave a swift nod and blinked as wetness crawled down my cheeks. “Yes.”
He took my lips again, holding his against them for a long moment before meeting my gaze. “Enjoy yourself out there. Be happy on your journey, you deserve it.”
I held his face and looked him square in the eye. “You take care of yourself until I get back.”
He nodded in understanding then hugged me close, squeezing me tighter than he ever had. “I’ll see you soon, beautiful. Call me when you land.”
After a few more hugs and way too much PDA, we finally parted ways. As I strolled away I cast one last glance over my shoulder at my adoptive family waving at me. I waved back then blew Benji a kiss.
He caught it and pressed it to his chest before mouthing ‘I love you.’
Chapter Thirty-One
~ Benji ~
Fresh snow crunched under my boots as I trekked up the walkway to the ranch style home. I knocked on the door while opening a message from Cam. A grin spread across my face at the image of her blowing me a kiss and winking while standing in front of the Eiffel Tower. The caption read: Looking forward to our date later. From Paris with love. I pressed my lips to the screen then tucked the phone back in my pocket.
Since Cam had left, every week we had these ‘dates.’ Each Saturday at 9 p.m. in whatever time zone she happened to be in, we’d Skype over a candle lit dinner. I’d catch her up on my life at home and she’d proudly show me all of her photos with a smile twinkling in her eyes and stretched across her face.
There were also times when things got a little kinky. Like last week when she’d put on a strip tease for me. While I damn sure appreciated it, I was left hella frustrated as was she. Self-satisfaction was virtually impossible after a taste of Cam’s kitty. The next three months couldn’t pass fast enough. I needed my baby in my arms and I needed myself in her.
After a third knock someone finally opened the door. Sasha stood with Odom perched on her hip, smiling up at me. He was dressed in red overalls with baby converse on his feet. She bounced him up and down causing him to laugh. “Look whose here Odom. It’s your big brother.”
His mouth opened into a wide grin showing off his two front teeth. He reached out his chubby little arms. “BB.”
I took him from her and stepped inside to get the cold air off him. “Sup lil man.” Glancing around, I peeped the Kwanzaa decorations they had up already. “Smells good in here.”
Sasha stepped around me then beckoned me toward the kitchen. “Kwesi is making lunch.”
I stepped in behind her and gaze him a nod. We didn’t really have any type of relationship. More so a mutual respect for one another. After all he was the man who saved my mother’s life.
As the story goes, my mom overdosed and ended up in the emergency room of the hospital he worked at. After pulling her back from the brink of death, he spent the next few days checking on her during her stay. When she was released she went back to thank him. From there they’d become friends. He was to her what Cam was to me. Her rock. She’d relapsed a couple times but he never left her side and eventually got her on a clean path.
My relationship with them was far from perfect, but with my mom and I attending therapy together, it was getting better as time progressed. It’d be a long path, but maybe one day we all really would be a family.
We all sat down to eat with me holding Odom in my lap, feeding him, and my mom insisting that I was spoiling him rotten.
“How’s Camryn doing?”
I wiped Odom’s chin before looking up at Sasha. “She’s good. In Paris right now.”
“Really? I’ve always wanted to go there.” She looked over at Kwesi and smiled.
He laughed while shaking his head. “Ever since Camryn went on her trip your mother has been hinting about us traveling the world.” He reached beside him and took her hand. “One day sweetheart. Maybe when Odom is older.” They smiled at one another then went back to their food.
I was happy for them, for her, but a part of me often wondered why couldn’t she have been this way when I was growing up. Although I was healing and had forgiven her, I suppose the child in me still longed for the nurturing I never received from my real mother
Therapy had helped me clear up and move past a lot of things. I’d come to learn that it was never me she hated, but Nathan. I was simply a reminder of the pain he’d caused and in her drug ridden mind taking it out on me was her way of coping. In no way was it right, but I finally understood.
After lunch my mom walked me to the door then gave me a quick hug. Yeah, that was a thing now. As I turned to leave she took my hand.
“Benji, wait.”
I looked down at her with my brow raised. “Yeah?”
“I um,” she bit down on her lower lip while shifting on her feet. “I just wanted to tell you that I…I love you, Benji.”
Tightness rose in my chest, the back of my eyes stinging. “You, um…” Wetness burned its way down one of my cheeks. My mind tried to wrap itself around her words. Ones so unfamiliar to me.
Her eyes flitted around my face. “Are you o–”
I pulled her to my chest, squeezing her tight, and buried my face in her shoulder. After a minute or so of sniffling, I lifted my head and spoke barely above a whisper near her ear. “That’s the first time you ever said that. Thank you.”
She released me and smiled. “I’ll see you in a few days for Christmas. Tell everyone I said hi.”
“I will. See you later.
~ ♥ ~
I made it home with just enough time to set up my room for Cam’s call. Jay and I’s shoulders brushed as we passed one another in the hall.
“Damn, Ben. You don’t see me?”
“Sup,” I called over my shoulder.
Inside my room I sat my take out bag on my desk then shrugged off my coat and hung it up. Whistling as I worked, I grabbed a couple of candles from the drawers and sat them on the nightstands. A little ambient lighting for the occasion. Now I just needed to set up the speakers for my go-to playlist which included all of Cam’s favorite slow jams.
Jay leaned against the door frame with both of his brows raised and a half smile on his face. “Look at you.”
I paused near the bed. “What?”
“All in love and ish. Never thought I’d see the day when Benjamin Creed…was whipped.”
I snatched up a pillow and tossed it at him while laughing. “Get outta here, man. Ain’t nobody whipped.”
He kicked the pillow away then swept his arm around the room. “Really?”
Glancing around, I couldn’t help but smile. Candles, soft music, the whole romantic atmosphere was so far from who I used to be. “Whatever, man. You are, too. So shut the hell up.”
He c
huckled and folded his arms. “Never said I wasn’t, but I can guaran-damn-tee you, she is, too.”
“Yeah, okay.” I went over to the door and pushed him back. “Now get out.”
“Rude ass. Don’t come wanting to play the game when you’re done then.” He turned and walked down the hall.
“I am coming to play it,” I called behind him. “And you gone have that shit set up, too.”
“Yeah, whatever.”
I closed the door then glanced at my watch. Shit. Five past three. I hurried over to the desk and tapped the keyboard to remove the screensaver. My Skype program was already running. It was kept that way during the day in case of an impromptu call from my lady.
Settling into my seat, I pulled up my contact list and scrolled down to Cam. The mouse pointer hovered over the icon beside her name which indicated she was offline.
I glanced at my watch again and then at the time on my computer to make sure it wasn’t fast. Looking at her name again I bit my lip and leaned back in my chair. Maybe she was in the shower. She liked to do that before our dates. Teasing me with that damn water dripping down her neck. My dick twitched in my boxers imagining licking it off of her sweet skin.
While waiting for her to pop online I unpacked my food and spread it in front of me. Cam had gotten me hooked on Mexican rice bowls, or maybe it was that they reminded me of her. Whatever the case, I now ate at least one per week.
Thirty minutes passed and still no Cam. A slow breath released itself from my lungs then I picked up my phone and called her. It rung several times before I was forwarded to her voicemail. “Hey, this is Camryn. Sorry I missed your call. Leave me a brief message and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. Have a great day.”
Beep.
“Hey babe, it’s me. Um...call me back.”
With my phone in my lap, I turned my gaze to the ceiling. Where the hell was she? Cam had never missed any of our dates. She’d been late a few times but she always called or texted to let me know.
My gut churned thinking of her in a foreign land. Anything could happen. What if she got separated from her group? She could be lost right now. Alone and scared.
I plucked my phone up and dialed her again. Voicemail. “Babe, is everything okay? Call me please.”
Another hour passed and still nothing. I was starting to feel like a stalker with the way I was blowing up her phone. Pushing away from my cold, untouched food, I stood and paced the room while dialing her number for the hundredth time. My fist itched to punch a wall when I got her voicemail again. “Cam, baby. You’re worrying me now.” I sunk into the mattress and hung my head. “Please call me and let me know you’re okay. I’m going crazy here. This isn’t like you. Could you please, please call me back. Let me know you’re okay. I love you.”
I hung up, slid my phone into my pocket, and then headed to the basement to see Jay.
A plastic cup hung from his mouth as he sat forward playing Fable.
I flopped down beside him and grabbed some chips.
He glanced over at me then moved his cup. “What’s wrong with you?”
“Cam. She missed our date and she’s not picking up her phone.”
“That’s not like her.”
“Ya think?” I dragged my hand down my face. “I’m starting to get worried. It’s been almost two hours.”
“Maybe she’s just caught up with work or something. I’m sure she’s fine.”
“Yeah, maybe, but I don’t know.”
He paused the game and sat down the controller. “Bro, stop worrying. Cam’s tough, she can handle herself. Besides, I’m sure her teacher wouldn’t let anything happen to her nor any other student.”
After a quick contemplation I nodded. “Yeah, yeah, you’re right. She probably just got tied up with something. They have meetings sometimes.”
“Right, so you’re making yourself sick for nothing. Relax,” he grabbed the extra controller and tossed it beside me. “while I whoop your ass in Soul Caliber.”
I twisted my face up at him and picked the controller up. “Whoop my ass? Never that.”
He changed the game and we got our long waging tournament underway. It dated back to Game Cube days. “So…what’s up with you?”
“Whatchu mean?”
“Well, you’re not in school. Cam is gone. What do you even do all day?”
“I’ve been doing a lot of volunteering lately.”
“Oh yeah? Where at?”
“Animal shelters mostly.”
He sipped from his drink and nodded. “That’s cool. You’re really into this animal thing, huh?”
“Yeah. I enjoy it.”
“You ever thought about making a career out of it? Maybe being a vet?”
“I’ve been tossing around a few things. It’s on my list. I just don’t want to make any decisions until I’m sure it’s what I want.”
“That’s understandable.”
We played a few rounds which included Jay cheating as per usual. Sore losing ass. Our current session ended and he sat down his controller. “So, uh…how’s Will?”
The chip I was getting ready to munch on hovered in front of my mouth. “Will? As in my sponsor, Will?”
“Yeah, how’s he been?” Jay watched me from the corner of his eye while sipping from a water bottle.
I chuckled and shook my head. “If this is your slick, roundabout way of asking if I’m drinking again, number one: Fail. Two: No, I’m not drinking. I’m good, man.”
“Alright. Just making sure. You were depressed for a minute there after Cam left.”
“That comes and goes. I miss her like crazy and some days are hard, but I’m not gonna let it steer me from my path. My life is good now. I ain’t going back there. Ever.”
“Good to hear. I’m glad.” Several moments of silence passed then he took a deep breath and leaned back against the couch. “I’ve wanted to talk to you about something for a while now. It’s taken me a long time to put it into words.”
“What’s up?”
“I know we’ve had our differences in the past, butted heads a lot. But there’s this one thing in particular. One I can’t seem to get past.”
“Which one is that?” I turned so my back was to the arm of the sofa and I was facing him.
“That thing with you and Gabi. The Kiss.”
I nodded and took a slow inhale. “I know what I did was screwed up, but I’ve apo–”
“I’m sorry.”
My mouth snapped shut and for a minute I could only stare at him. “Come again?”
“I know we’ve discussed this matter before and you’ve apologized. The reason I can’t move on is because I didn’t. It took me way too long to acknowledge my wrong in the situation and I’m sorry for that as well. I overreacted and I apologize.”
“Don’t even worry about it,” I said, shaking my head. “It’s cool.”
“Nah, it’s not. You were going through something and I gave up on you for my own selfish reasons. It was wrong. It was foul. I was a jackass, and I apologize. I shoulda been there for you.”
“Uh, thanks man. I appreciate it. We good though.”
“Cool, cool.” He reached over and we slapped hands and then hugged.
I sat back again and grabbed a handful of barbecue chips. “You know what I just realized?”
“What?”
“It’s too damn quiet in here. Where’s Gabi?”
Chuckling, he picked up his drink. “Are you insinuating that my fiancé is loud?”
“Nah, I’m stating that at times she talks too damn much.”
“Man, leave my future wife alone. She talks a lot because she has a lot to say. She’s intelligent and opinionated. Those are good qualities.”
“I agree.”
“Anyway. She’s at her dorm hanging out with some friends.”
“Friends? I wasn’t aware she had any besides Cam.”
“She’s being more sociable these days. She, her roommate, and her roommate’s friend are
having a girl’s night later or something.”
“Oh, that’s cool. Expanding her circle and–” My phone vibrated against my thigh. I pulled it out and my heart leapt at Cam’s name. “Hey, baby. What’s up? You okay?”
“Yes, I’m fine. Babe, I am so sorry I missed our Skype date. Our lesson ran late then Marco took us all to this Christmas party and time just got away from me.” She paused and sniffled a bit. “I’m really sorry. I feel terrible. I am terrible.”
“Cam, Cam, calm down baby. It’s okay. I understand. I’m just glad you’re okay. I was worried.” I stood and started to make my way upstairs.
“Sorry I worried you. I didn’t hear my phone ringing over the music at the party, but as soon as I realized what time it was I came straight back here to call you. I’m so sorry, Benji.”
“Baby, stop apologizing. You’re fine. I’m fine. I understand, and I’m not upset. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“I would like to see that beautiful face though, so can you Skype me?”
“Of course. See you in a minute.”
I closed the door to my room, grabbed my laptop, and got comfortable on the bed. Her call came through moments later. “There she is.”
A cheesy grin spread across her face. “Hi.”
“Hi, yourself.”
“Did you eat?”
“Nah, but I’ll get something later. You?”
“Yeah, at the party.” She lay on her side with her head resting on her fist. “How was your day?”
“Pretty good. Spent some time with the folks. Odom is getting big as hell. Oh! Guess what?”
“What?”
“My mom.” I bit my lip to fight a smile. “She um, she told me she loved me.”
Cam’s eyes widened and she sat up a bit. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah.”
“Awww, I’m so proud of you guys.”
“Yeah, we’ve come a long way.” Sitting forward, I moved my computer aside and pulled off my shirt. “So, how was your day Miss Lady?”
Her gaze lowered to her bed and she picked at the fabric of her comforter. “It was good.”
I studied her a second, narrowing my eyes. “You sure?”
She lifted her head, flashing a quick smile. “Yes. It was fun. We went to a few places today. Marco says I have a gift for catching my subject at the perfect moment.”
Teach Me Page 26