by Watkins, TM
Where was I? Was I truly in heaven? Had I died on the floor as I believed I would? It was likely. Dorian said that he would be a while with Eva, more so if she was being difficult. I should have gone with him, he had offered and I said that for a while it would be wise to let her adjust to me being around. Dorian accepted it with a smile. But it was too late for 'should haves'. I was dead, this was heaven. Or was it? I thought that the ideal of heaven was that it was bliss, happiness and peace. Yet I had none of those things.
Maybe I was in hell. Maybe after all these years of espionage and the lies associated with it, refusing to talk to my mother, indifference to my father, maybe I was suffering in hell for it. Could it be that there was no fiery inferno with little red demons with pitch forks? Was it possible that instead of burning in the pits of hell for an eternity I would be stuck in a blinding and pain filled limbo of pure white?
The noise started again, having stopped for some unknown time. Repeating and annoying, constantly talking. The incessant nattering about nothing that I could understand was driving me crazy. It was like I was stuck with a parrot that spoke another language. Annoying and high pitched noise that was slowly becoming static. I was getting used to the white light now, it wasn't so harsh now that I had become accustomed to it. Also, the pain had lessened but not by much.
I hated Amber. If someone had told me a year ago that she would shoot me, that she would be the complete opposite of everything I believed she was, I would accuse them of being a liar. How could I not see who she truly was? She had played us all like the master spy she was. Amber Michaels had infiltrated our company and it was likely that she was feeding the competitor information for years. It was truly an unforgivable act. Sure, it was our industry and it was common practice but she pretended to be my best friend. Or rather, she was my best friend and betrayed me. I really didn't know her at all. When I had the opportunity to kill her, I couldn't do it. Instead I shot her in the leg. Yet give her the chance to return the favor and she planted one in my stomach.
I wanted out of this nothing land. I wanted to return to my life for one purpose only. Kill Amber. If there was a God and a devil, was it possible that I could do some kind of deal to buy my way back to my life? I hoped so. I really wanted to kill her now. I wanted to be with Dorian and my family but most of all, I wanted Amber Michaels dead.
I wanted to live again.
Chapter 48: KC and the man from the wilderness
The sound of beeping was the first annoying thing that I heard. Over and over again the monotonous sound roused me from my pain filled slumber. No, it wasn't slumber. I didn't dream, I thought. I thought about how much I wanted to kill Amber as retribution for shooting me in the stomach. A soft touch stroked at my hand, the gentle caress filled me with warmth. My hand gripped the touch, feeling the soft skin against mine. Something shifted, though it pained me to open my eyes I did so. More blinding bright light surrounded me, this time it was different. It was stark yet my eyes could adjust to it. White walls that had shadows from the play of light. I turned to the natural light that was peeking through the vertical blinds, a view of the city laid beyond it. The soft touch squeezed my hand and I could hear a muted whimper of happiness. I turned to Dorian as he kissed the palm of my hand with a relieved smile.
“You look like shit.” I rasped.
It was true, he really did look terrible. The once immaculate Dorian was replaced with a man that looked like he had been in the wilderness for a year. He had stubble that was almost a beard, something that I had never seen on him. He was down to a crinkled business shirt and pants.
“Thanks.” He grumbled with a playful smile. “Kind of happens when you keep a bedside vigil for a week.”
“A week?” I groaned. “Am I in hospital?”
I frowned at my question. Of course I was. Except that it didn't really look like one. He nodded grimly.
“They did the surgery and patched you up. Lucky for you it hit the side and was a superficial wound. She had pretty bad aim if she was intending to kill you.”
I scoffed and it hurt, wincing as the tears welled in my eyes.
“You are now in the post-surgery section and you'll probably be here for a while. They want to make sure you don't get an infection but other than that it's fine. The bullet passed through you and embedded into the window frame.”
Dorian sat on the edge of the bed, refusing to let go of my hand. It was the sweetest thing.
“She's dead.” He grinned darkly. “I know that you would yearn for your own justice but once your family found out they insisted that it was dealt with swiftly. As to who did the deed, I do not know but I believe that they might have had an argument over it. Walter mentioned that there might have been a bit of a scuffle until your father intervened.”
“My family, fighting over who would exact my vengeance?”
He nodded with a broad grin and leaned in to whisper.
“Walter had a black eye.”
I chuckled, wondering who it was that landed the punch and who won the right to kill Amber.
“I feel that I failed, is it not the duty of a man to protect his love?”
“Dorian.” I chided softly.
“And worse yet, I feel robbed that I could not redeem myself with killing her.”
“Stop it. You’re not trained for those kinds of things, my family is.”
He shrugged and scratched at the beard. I couldn't help it, I had to touch it knowing that once I was well again and he didn't feel the need to sit with me constantly, the beard would be gone.
“It's bloody itchy.”
Dorian leaned over and kissed me softly. I reveled in the moment, I didn't think that I would have my demands met. But I had. The woman who had caused this suffering was gone, my family cared enough about me to actually come to blows, arguing over who would kill my would-be assassin and then there was the wild and unruly man in front of me. He looked like he had died a thousand deaths in the past week and as sad as the situation for him was, I wanted to jump for joy. I didn't though. I willfully restrained the glee that I had found because of his love and need for me and smiled back at him.
“No more getting shot. I don't think I could handle it.”
“Aww.” I pouted. “At least you don't have to deal with the pain.”
“Oh but I do KC.”
He took my hand and pressed to the skin that was exposed in the v of his shirt. His skin was barely warm, the frosty temperature in the room had chilled his skin.
“This poor heart has been filled with so much pain, finding you slumped on the floor in a pool of blood, watching from the doors as Eva's medical team prepared you for the paramedics. You were in surgery for hours and then the coma. I thought that I'd lost you.”
“As if you could be rid of me that easily.”
His eyes rose to mine, I offered him a soft and sweet smile and hoped that it might cheer him up. Dorian grinned as he gazed at me.
“I wouldn’t want to be rid of you, I do happen to be rather fond of you.”
The free hand that was resting on the other side of the bed laced into my fingers, lifting the threaded hands to his lips. Gently kissing my hand, the smile increased.
“Rest for now, the sooner you are better, the sooner we can get you out of here.”
I nodded and closed my eyes, feeling the warmth of his hand on mine and the soft yet bristly kiss of his lips on my forehead.
Life could not get any better than this.
Part 7: At the dawn of a new day
The day begins at dawn, life begins anew with each day.
I could only hope that it would do the same for me.
Trouble free and ready for a new life?
It should have been an easy path.
Chapter 49: Doctors and Nurses
Dorian helped me onto the lounge, carefully moving my legs onto the seat beside me.
“I am capable.”
“Of course you are.”
“We could go to El Toro tonig
ht.” I said hopefully.
“We could however you are still recovering.”
Pursing my lips, I said nothing. A month had passed and I was still being treated as if it had just happened. I’d done my time in the hospital, the doctor said I was good to go home and yet Dorian was still treating me as if I was made of glass. It was frustrating.
“How’s Eva?” I asked, trying to change the subject.
“Grumpy. Previously I’d spend a lot of time with her but now there is a pretty distraction in my life and poor old sister is missing out.”
Oh.
“She’ll be fine. She’s got people to talk to and she has to be realistic, it’s not as if I would never find someone. She could have too, had she not been so stupid.”
“Once she’s better she’ll be able to go outside, won’t she?”
“Of course.”
Dorian offered a smile that looked genuine, even if it was a little pained. He said nothing more, instead he devoted his attention to covering me with a soft blanket and ensured that I was warm and tucked in tight.
“Is there anything that you need?”
“Just a little affection.”
“A little is all your getting KC.”
Dorian leaned over and kissed me. His eyes showed the burning hunger that was gripping him but he was determined to keep it under wraps. No playing doctors and nurses for us.
“I am feeling okay you know.”
“I know; you keep telling me.”
“I’d like to go out for dinner Dorian, I’ve eaten nothing but hospital food for far too long.”
“It seemed alright to me.”
He looked at me as he sat on the edge of the lounge and sighed, nodding his head.
“Alright but not for too long. Dinner but no dancing.”
I pouted, it earned me a mighty frown.
“Nope. No excessive movements. Accept that you’ve got dinner and be happy with it.”
“So I guess that means no playing doctors and nurses after dinner?”
Dorian huffed with a slight laugh, shaking his head.
“Definitely not.”
My pout increased and I fluttered my eyes, hoping to change his mind.
“Not going to work. Now stay put and watch television, I’ll be in the study if you need me.”
With that order, he leaned over and kissed me softly. It left me bereft of him and his touch, of everything that he gave in just one moment. I was still made of glass and I was not going to win this battle, no matter how desperate either of us were.
Watching him cross the room, I hoped he might turn back and see how much I missed him. Restraining a frustrated huff, I picked up the remote and began to flick through the television stations.
Reaching a news program, I saw the image of Eric Dunlop and his rat like smile. Belle Femme was being closed down. Under the increased pressure of complaints from customers and of course, the unsolved assassination of Dunlop, the stockholders and what remained of the management decided that it was for the best.
It was interesting that his death was still unsolved and I wondered what happened to the motorcycle and the gun that was left at the drug house. Clearly the cops hadn’t found anything worthwhile or maybe they didn’t bother with the tip-off that Dorian had clearly given them.
Feeling the sudden need to be elsewhere, I cast the remote and the blanket aside and slowly turned my legs on the lounge. As soon as my feet hit the floor, Dorian was at the door to the study, glaring at me as if I was a naughty child.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“Bathroom.”
Rushing over, he helped me to my feet.
“I am capable.” I muttered defiantly.
“Of course you are.”
It was like a broken record between us at the moment. I wanted to be normal again, to go back to the way things were before Amber decided to puncture me with a bullet. I wanted to do things and not have someone hovering around me, waiting for me to buckle under the pain, thus proving his point about my inability.
Of course, he’d never said it directly but it was always there, shown in his caring yet incredibly frustrating help. Dorian was gentle in his own forceful way. It was always on his terms, my care and what I did until I was better was not for negotiation. Accept it or go back to the hospital, something that I didn’t want and I knew that he didn’t either.
I suppose I could be more insistent but it wouldn’t do us any good, we were still in an odd place in terms of our relationship. We’d begun with a whole lot of lies and deception, making this work was not going to be easy. We would try because what we had was good and it was fun, we liked each other and dare I say it, maybe even loved each other.
That was lingering in my mind, the fact that Dorian had spent his days and nights by my side, waiting for me to wake up. He’d spend so much time with me after I’d woken, doing everything for me and ensuring that I got the rest that I needed. Giving him gratitude was easy, I just had to accept his help.
It was easier said than done.
Chapter 50: Creepy guy returns
Back on the lounge, I was brought lunch and told that I was to alert Dorian before I decided to venture to the bathroom by myself again. Thankfully he had left me to do all of the necessary parts by myself. If he’d tried to stay it would have ended in a fight, I did not want him or anyone around while I used the facilities. That was just gross.
So now I was engrossed in some soppy midday movie, clutching at the blanket as I tried not to cry. It was abysmal and I was a wreck. My phone buzzed on the coffee table, cautiously I looked at the study door and waited for Dorian to pounce. With no sighting of him, I reached over and grabbed it, looking back at the door. Still Dorian free.
The message was from Tilley, a picture of her scan. I couldn’t make the image out aside from a lot of black and white blurriness. Of course, I knew it was the kid but it did not make any sense to me. Another message came through.
What do you think, Aunt KC?
Oh lord, I’m going to be an aunt. How crazy was that? At least once the hello cuddle was over, I could pass the kid back to his or her mother and be done with it. As for having kids of my own, I suppose so, but definitely not any time soon.
Glancing at the door again, I wondered what Dorian thought of them. His days and nights were always busy, between the company and Eva, he was a man that rarely sat down. Now I was thrown into the mix and I guess I made his life all the more complicated. Children were probably somewhere in his hopes and dreams for the future but it was probably a long way off, like me. I suppose it would be a good idea to speak with him about, make sure we’re on the same level as each other.
“Is that the baby?”
I shrieked, clutching my chest as I turned and saw Dorian standing behind the lounge and looking at my phone. He looked at me and grinned like a madman.
“I am going to tie a bell on you.”
“Sounds like fun but not until you’re better.”
“Deviate.” I growled.
He leaned over the lounge and kissed me, still amused at freaking me out.
“Is that my new name now? No longer creepy guy?”
I gasped, turning to him.
“How did you know that?”
He grinned at me, tilting his head slightly. “I made it my business to know everything about you KC. That included what you thought of me.”
“Yeah well, maybe you are creepy guy again.” I grumbled. “Because that really is creepy.”
Dorian chuckled and wandered off, taking my lunch plate with him. I hadn’t seen this so called housekeeper as yet, I was beginning to think she wasn’t real. Maybe she was really quiet on her feet, like Dorian. The apartment was spotlessly clean, not a speck of dirt to be seen.
I was left to the movie that was now the credits rolling up the screen. Thankful that I wouldn’t be crying any more, I turned the television off and flicked the blanket away.
“I’m getting up now.” I said
quietly, testing out Dorian’s hearing.
Keeping an eye on the entry to the kitchen, I turned my legs to the floor and wiggled forward, waiting for him to scold me yet again. Still, there was nothing. Putting the remote back onto the table, I took my phone and stood up.
“What are you doing KC?” He snapped.
“I was wondering where you were.” I muttered.
Sweetly I turned and looked at the angry man.
“And I did tell you. I cannot be held responsible if you did not hear me.”
“Whispers do not count. Where are you planning on going?”
“To get ready, obviously.”
Dorian looked at me as if it wasn’t obvious. I huffed, rolling my eyes as I turned to move around the lounge. Slow and steady steps, I was always able to get where I wanted if I was careful.
He granted me those few steps and then insisted on helping me to the bedroom. I looked at the bed with longing, wishing that we could misbehave like we had originally planned. It was unfair, I’d lost a month of my life to this nonsense, a month of getting to know Dorian physically and moving our relationship forward. Now we were in this stagnant puddle that was him being overly caring and me being frustrated.
Maybe if tonight went well, I’d be able to convince him in a little sex free love. Like our first night together, almost naked, misbehaving and relaxing. It wouldn’t be anything strenuous, just gentle love that would make me feel wanted and hopefully would make him a little less stressed.
When we reached the bedroom, Dorian made me sit on the lounge while he held out dresses. Each one was assessed based on how much pressure it would put on my stomach. Dorian held out a silky dress that was predominately white, the flowers were large and colorful. It was an ideal choice considering that it was soft and would float around my frame. But there was one little problem.
I pulled back the material of my sweat pants and showed him what a month of not being allowed to tend to my own grooming had done. Dorian looked at the hairy drum stick and restrained a smile.