“Come on, Smurf, let’s go. First stop is the bank.” She pulled back and pulled on my arm.
“My check and the letters. Where are they? I don’t remember what I did with them, Ocean… oh my god, I lost the check!” I pulled her into a hug again and held her for a minute.
“Liv, relax. Everything’s in my glove box. Come on, we have to go.” I pushed her to the passenger side door and opened it for her. I walked around the Range, and she pushed my door open for me from the inside. I hopped in and handed her our phones from my back pocket. She took mine unlocked it as she started searching it for something. I had no idea what, and I had nothing to hide so I let her. As far as I was concerned, what was mine was hers, and she’d never have to ask me for anything.
I started the truck and pulled out, following Law onto Vineland Ave. Liv switched on the Bluetooth in the car, and the sexy base and rhythmic sounds of Reggaeton blasted through my sound system. I pressed the switch to open the moon roof, and all four windows came down. Liv was dancing and grinding in her seat, and screw me if I didn’t want to be that seat right now. Her hair was flying in the wind, and she was smiling, singing along to the lyrics, and taunting me as she moved her hips in her seat. I laughed and tried to keep my eyes on the damn road, but she was making it impossible.
Once we got downtown, I let Liv go with Law to handle their bank accounts and decided to visit some jewelry stores. I wasn’t ready to propose to Liv, even though I knew I’d do it at the drop of a dime, if that’s what she wants from me. Instead, I wanted to get her something special, something unique, and something that would tell her that I loved her more than anything, and more than any other woman I had ever met. When the idea of the picture perfect piece came to me, I just about skipped all the way to Trabert & Hoeffer Jewelers.
I opened the jeweler’s door and walked in with a million butterflies flying blind in my stomach.
“Hello, sir. Is there something that I may help you find?”
I looked up and a cute blond was standing behind the counter. She was the kind of woman I was used to. Well-polished and put together on the outside, but on the inside, she was dying to get bent over and fucked hard. It was written all over her face, and in any other time in my sorry life, I would have done just that. However, this time I had Liv, this time I had someone to want to be better for—and there was nothing this blond chick could give me to prove me wrong.
I walked to the counter she was practically leaning over trying to expose her tits that were fighting to bust out of her low V-neck blouse. I extended my hand and introduced myself.
“Ocean Hawthorne. I’m looking to have a customized charm bracelet made. I prefer it to be a 24 karat linked bracelet encrusted in black diamonds, and I’m not sure what your collection of charms are, but they may need to be custom made, as well. Is that something your jeweler can accommodate?” I asked pulling my hand back.
She licked her lips, and I fought hard not to roll my eyes in front of her. “Yes, of course. I’ll grab the paper work to get started on your design. She must be a special lady,” she said as she swished her narrow hips and long legs over to the back office. Yeah, yeah, she is.
My cell phone went off, and I pulled it out to see a text from Liv. I looked out of the storefronts glass windows to make sure she hadn’t spotted me.
Liv ~ where u disappear 2? Casanova almost got drop kicked in the bank
Me ~ LOL wat did he do?
Liv ~ he tried to switch the acct # of the acct I wanted to deposit my check in2… I threatened to smash the owners Audi windows so the clerk switched back the accts.
Me ~ LMFAO! U make me proud baby
Liv ~ stopping by starbucks want n e thing?
Me ~ u whip cream hold the cup sugar n coffee…
Liv ~ sorry pool boy already been there
The next time I saw a pool service truck on the road, I swear she was going to make me kick the driver’s ass just because. I was getting ready to text her back but decided not to. I would let her sweat this one out, instead.
The blond came back with the paperwork, and I filled it out as quickly as I could. I didn’t want her and Law strolling in and finding me here. I signed my signature on the bottom of the form and handed the papers back to blondie. She took them and slipped them into a folder.
“How long will it take for the charms to arrive?”
She opened up the folder and looked over the details. “Well, these are pretty unique pieces, so I would say two weeks at most, but worst case three weeks tops.”
I think I could live with that, besides Liv wasn’t going anywhere, and neither was I. She slid a card over the glass case, and I grabbed it reading her name. It read Claudia Hammond. I was getting ready to pocket it when I flipped it over and saw her name hand written along with a cell phone number and red lipstick stains of her mouth.
When I looked at her, she smiled at me. “If you need anything just give me a call.”
I slid the card back to her and her smile turned upside down. “As soon as the pieces are in, just call me.” I said turning around walking out the door. I pulled out my cell, and I missed one call and one text both from Liv. I opened the text first.
Liv ~ big BABY!
I pocketed my phone and headed toward Starbucks. Opening the door to Starbucks, I instantly heard the bickering of Liv and Law. They were arguing about Law finding a girlfriend, or something to that effect. I walked up behind Liv’s chair and pulled her hair as I took the seat next to her.
“Hey! That hurt! So now you decide to show up?” I ignored her and reached for her coffee, but she slapped my hand away and snatched it out of my reach. She was pissed and I loved it.
“Get your own damn coffee,” she said taking a sip of hers and slamming her cup down on the table. I looked up at Law who was frowning at her.
I grabbed the back of her hair pulling it back and brought her lips to mine, and I plunged my tongue down her throat. Funny how she didn’t put up a fight, because I knew she wanted it. I sucked on her tongue and swallowed the taste of cinnamon and coffee as she moaned in my mouth.
“Gross, guys, get a room!” I pulled away abruptly and Liv was livid. I grabbed her coffee and her hand, yanking her up out of her seat.
“Come on, Zena, time to hit the studio.”
Chapter Forty-Two
Lawrence
On my ride to the studio, alone might I add, I started thinking about the words Sunshine said to me at Starbucks about needing to find a girlfriend. Easy for her to say now that Ocean found her, but shit wasn’t that easy. I tried to settle down with an okay girl… yeah, the bitch ended up being crazy as hell, but I tried it and it wasn’t right. It didn’t feel right. I don’t feel like I should settle for any girl, granted I had plenty to choose from. Finding a willing participant wasn’t the issue, but finding someone that I could fall in love with… well, that was the issue.
Yeah, I loved to screw around, fuck random chicks, get blowjobs from models, but ever sense I met Sunshine, I didn’t want to be that guy anymore. I wanted the crazy love that Hunter Hayes sung about. The kind of love where you can’t sleep, can’t eat, can’t think, and just can’t fucking function without her in your life. Sunshine was taken, and there was no way I would really try to take her away from Ocean. For one, he really would end up killing me, and two, I didn’t love her in that way. Pulling into the studio’s parking lot, I shifted my train of thought to focus on my business.
Law, no time for games, no time for chicks, and unfortunately, no time for pussy. I had a business to run, and if I wanted to do this shit right, I needed to focus one hundred and ten percent. I stepped down my from truck as Ocean’s ride pulled up next to mine, and I headed for the front door. This was the first time Ocean would actually see the inside, and I couldn’t wait to show him all of my ideas and bounce shit off him. Ocean didn’t take enough credit for having brains, but he had a serious knack for this business, and having him as my partner was everything I’d ever dreamed about w
hen we were kids.
As he walked up to the door with Sunshine in hand, I turned to unlock the door.
“Okay, cuz, hold on to her panties because this place is going to make you wet.”
I heard Sunshine start to make gagging noises and laughed as I pushed through the door and into the studio. The place was just as I left it days ago. “I’ll lock the door behind us. Go show Ocean around, and I’ll hang out up front.”
Like a little kid, I grabbed Ocean by the arm and I drug him around speaking a million miles an hour about what would go where, how it would look, and every time I asked his opinion, I would cut him off and move on to some other random thought. He just laughed and went along with it, because he couldn’t hide the fact that he was starting to get excited, too. Damn, it felt good to have my cousin back!
Livie
I listened and watched as Law was dragging Ocean around the studio like two little kids the day after Christmas. It’s like Law was showing off all his toys he’d just opened, and it was the cutest thing ever. It didn’t take long for Ocean to loosen up and feed off Law’s excitement. My phone went off, and I didn’t recognize the ringtone right away, but as I pulled out the phone from my back pocket the name on the caller id made my blood run cold, and my heart stop. I mean really stop. I leaned onto the counter for support, and my head started throbbing instantly bringing back all of my pain and insecurities and fear of being left alone.
The number was the only number I’d ever feared receiving a call from. The phone went off again and again, and the caller id read ANGELICA ACOSTA, CFO. There was only one reason Angelica would bother to call me, and I remember my dad explaining it to me very well in his letter’s he’d sent. Something terrible was wrong, and she was calling me to deliver the bad news, only I wasn’t strong enough to bare it. I silenced the phone as I heard the heavy footsteps of Ocean and Law come up behind me. I quickly slid the phone into my back pocket and grabbed the counter top with both hands to keep my body from swaying back and forth.
Ocean’s body came up behind me pressing my stomach into the counter, and I would have melted into him, but at the moment, I was trying my hardest to lose it. “Hey, I convinced Law to give you one of the rooms for a yoga studio. What do you think?” I wanted to respond, I wanted to sound okay, but instead, I stood frozen, a statue all over again.
“Baby?” I shook my head in a yes motion, but I had no idea what I was agreeing to.
Ocean stepped to the side and looked at my face, and the excitement on his face left quicker than a lightning strike. He pried me away from the counter and held my face in his hands.
“Baby, Liv, what is it? What happened?” I stared back into his warm brown eyes, and I wanted to tell him, but I’d burdened him enough with my problems. I couldn’t be the one to drown him in my pain; I’d rather do it alone. He didn’t deserve my crazy; he deserved a sane woman, a woman who didn’t mutilate her body to feel good about herself.
I reached up and clasped my hands around his wrists.
“I’m not feeling well, Ocean… I think I need to go home.” He rolled his eyes seeing straight through my bullshit, and it hurt. It hurt, because I wanted him to help me get through this.
“Bullshit, Liv. What happened?” I squeezed his wrists tighter.
“I just want to go home. I thought I could do it, but I want to go home and put on some sweats. I can’t do this anymore.” It was half true, so I thought it sounded believable. Law came up, and he froze as he turned the corner.
“What’s up, guys? Sunshine, you okay?”
I stomped my foot against the cabinet out of frustration wanting to run away from this situation.
“I’m fine, Law; I just want to go home.”
“Bullshit, you’re lying. Tell me what the fuck happened, Livie.” Ocean was furious, and he had every right to be. He knew I was lying, and he also knew he should be the last person I should be lying to. I pulled his hands off my face and scooted to the side.
“I’m going home, I don’t feel well, and I don’t have to explain to you why that is. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m leaving!”
“Fine. I’ll go with you.” I grabbed Oceans shirt and stopped him from walking around the counter.
“You will not! Law isn’t done with you. If we’re going to open this place up in a month, you two need to start planning and drawing out the layout. I am perfectly capable to taking myself home. You need to stay!” The tears were welling up in my eyes and I was having a hard time keeping my voice from cracking. I was yelling at him to stay when my heart wanted him to take me away, and take the pain away forever.
“Ocean, maybe you should let her go. It’s only a couple blocks away. If you need us, you’ll call, right, Sunshine?”
I nodded in agreement and let go of Oceans shirt, only he grabbed my arm before I could move away.
“I’ll be around back,” I heard Law say as he disappeared around the corner.
“Livie, I’m not stupid, so just tell me what’s wrong.”
“Ocean, please,” I begged, not able to keep up my terrible front.
“I just want to go home, so let me go.” The words sounded too much like a final goodbye, and my heart shattered even more into tinier, sharper pieces.
“Let me go with you, baby. I’ll give you your space… but I want you close. Let me go with you,” he begged.
He picked me up by the hips and placed me on the counter. He laid his head on my shoulder and rested his lips on the special spot.
“Ocean, please, I’ll be home. I’ll be safe. I just want to go home. Law needs you here.”
“But Livie, I need you more, so let me go with you,” he begged. The only way he would let me go is if I got mad, so I got mad at myself for being so week and took it out on him.
“No! Just give me the damn keys so I can go, Ocean!” I pushed him off and he stood back with a wild look in his eyes. I could feel the heat radiating off him, and he wanted to throttle me for refusing his need to comfort me, but I needed out soon before I caved. He reached into his pocket and slammed the keys onto the counter causing me to jump.
“Go! You want to be left alone, you got it!” He turned and stormed toward the back were Law had disappeared, punching the walls as he left.
Chapter Forty-Three
Livie
Not wanting to think twice about the dumb decision I had just made to push Ocean way, I spun around on the counter and hopped off quickly, walking to the door before he could come out of nowhere and trap me here. Once out of the studio, I ran to his car, jumped in the driver seat, started it, and threw the car in reverse. The tires squealed as I shifted the gear to drive and I took off like a bat out of hell toward the condos.
My phone was vibrating in my back pocket with a voice message most likely. A voice message that had the power to end me if I weren’t strong enough to hear what Angelica had to say.
I already knew that I wasn’t strong enough, but it was only a matter of time before I snapped and did something so drastic and irreversible. I was meant to be alone and tortured by my demons. I didn’t know any other way to live. Ocean was my salvation, but even Ocean couldn’t completely convince me I was worth saving, no one and nothing ever would.
My own mother stopped loving me years ago. The woman who labored for hours giving me life and bringing me into this world stopped loving me. I wasn’t worthy of anyone’s love, no matter how badly I craved it and needed it.
The front gate opened slower than usual, of course, because I was having a nervous breakdown. Once it cleared enough for me to pass, I stomped on the gas and flew through the speed bumps. Slamming on the brakes, I put the car in park, grabbed the keys, and jumped out of the car kicking the door shut behind me. I ran up the flight of stairs, taking two and three sets at a time. Once I got through the front door, I closed it behind me leaning my back against it, letting my body slide to the ground. I reached for my phone and viewed Angelicas three missed calls, one voice message, and one text. I opened the t
ext first feeling my chest tighten, and the air restrict in my lungs.
Angelica ~ Livie please call me… URGENT.
My body broke out in violent tremors, and I could barely keep the phone steady in my hands. It slipped from my grip and hit the tile sending an eerie echo throughout the condo. My tears finally broke free, unable to hold in the pain that was burning me alive from the inside. I grabbed the phone and played the voice message, trying hard to numb my brain before I heard the words that could possibly be the last I would hear.
“Livie, sweetheart, this is Angelica, I’m sure you’re aware. I have something I need to share with you and prefer that you called. Please call me, Livie.”
My inner demon wanted me to call, so that I could fall into its web. I retrieved the number and called back. Angelica picked up on the first ring.
“Livie, is that you?” I hiccupped and sucked in a breath as best I could to speak, but the sobs hindered my attempt.
“Ye…Yes.”
“Oh Livie, sweetheart I’m so sorry to have to tell you this. Your father. He suffered a severe heart attack, and he’s not going to make it, Livie. Sweetheart, I’m so sorry, I…”
I let the phone fall to the floor as the screams erupted from my throat. “NOOOOOOO! NOOOOOO! DON’T, DADDY, DON’T LEAVE ME! Y.. YOU CAN’T FUCKING LEAVE ME, DADDY!” I banged my head hard against the door behind me, and the pain did nothing to dull my hurt. I got on my hands and knees, crawling my way to the kitchen frantically looking for something… I needed something sharp, something that would cause me the most pain imaginable. I grabbed the counter top and pulled myself up as the room spun around me. I pulled out drawer after drawer searching for something, anything, a fucking KNIFE! The assholes must have hidden them or thrown them out. I knew I saw them the other night. I ran my hands along the counter tops, knocking down everything in sight, and everything in reach. I kicked the cabinets, screamed until my throat felt raw, and soar.
Oceans Collide Page 21