I forgot my glasses, but instinctually knew the way to my secret garden. I visited almost every day, and have done so since the first day of my arrival at the Addison estate, two years ago. I glanced down at my bare feet. The ground beneath them felt cool. One of the straps to my powder-blue nightgown fell from my shoulder. I slipped it back in place. The baby-doll nightgown was a hand-me-down from Bentley, so it was much skimpier than I would have bought, but I liked it. Wearing my sister’s clothes, I pretended to be someone else.
When something rustled in the bushes, I stopped. For a moment I considered going back to the house. I should get back in bed, but I couldn’t take any more nightmares. I wanted the peace, and the soothing quiet of my garden. I needed to feel the tranquility I always felt as I sat on my bolder and listened to the breeze tussle with the leaves of the maple. I longed to feel the echo of the wind whisper across my skin. I wished to focus on the soft gurgle of the fountain. I required serenity so much so, that this desire, this need, outweighed my fear of the dark.
As I ducked into my garden, a beam of light scattered across the path. I figured it was Reid, coming home from a date. Date. I gritted my teeth with the thought, and heard the familiar humming sound of his motor as it pulled up the long drive. I would know the sound anywhere. He drove a slick black Jaguar.
I found my boulder bench and sat. I brought my knees up to my chest, tucking my head down. Here in the dark, with only the dim light of the estate, and the moon that popped in and out of existence, playing peek-a-boo from behind the clouds, I finally felt like I disappeared. I wanted to hide away from the nightmares, from the fears. I hoped to vanish. Lose the scared little girl who stayed trapped within those nightmares. If only I could evaporate. Change from whoever this Trinity had become.
There was a noise somewhere close. I didn’t want to move, to look.
“Baby bird, it’s just me,” Reid said, assuring me in a calming tone.
“Reid, what are you doing?”
I adjusted my legs. Put them down. Folded my arms over my breasts, and crossed my legs. I wanted to blend into the bolder. Mesh into the structure. Dissolve.
“I thought I saw you. I was wondering why you would be out here in the dark?” Reid replied as he sat down beside me.
Feeling weary to the bone, I decided not to lie, not to hide the truth. I was tired of hiding the truth. Reid already knew I was a freak so one more confession wouldn’t change his opinion.
“I have nightmares.”
I dropped my face from view. Reid reached, lifted my chin up.
“About what?”
“Different things,” I confessed. “Sometimes about darkness, sometimes about open spaces, sometimes—”
“Trinity, have you always been so frightened, so scared of everything?”
I did something I would have never thought; I grabbed Reid’s hand. I held on to it in an attempt to absorb some of his strength.
“No,” I confessed.
“Then what happened?”
I skimmed my lips over Reid’s knuckles. I had nothing left to lose, I figured. He was leaving soon. He may not come back. Someday he wouldn’t come back. I feared that, the thought of him moving on with his life and leaving me and my fantasies of him behind. I considered for a moment. I knew my fear never got me anywhere so I was going to give a part of my fear up.
I clenched my smaller hand around his large one.
“I almost died,” I said. The sound of my voice seemed to come from nowhere as if it were part of the night itself.
“Tell me how, baby bird?”
“We haven’t always lived here in California,” I said. “At one time we lived in New York. My father was an architect. Anyway, I’d gone into the city with him. I’d been bugging to go with him. I was closer with him than my sister Bentley was.” A shudder racked my body. He brushed his hand down the back of my head, twined his fingers into what had to be wild tangles.
“It’s okay, Trinity. Tell me.”
“We’d gone to meet one of my father’s friends. After their meeting, we would spend the day together. He planned all the events. There were some buildings he wanted to show me. He knew I liked architecture. So he was going to show off ‘some of the best’ as he called them.”
I pulled back from Reid’s hold. He was looking at me. Really looking. I shivered.
“We were walking. I found a penny. I remember the bright shining color of copper flickering on the ground. I picked it up and showed it to my father. He told me to ‘make a wish.’ I remember his smile, the way his face looked. His eyes were deep green, you know, like Bentley’s.”
“Like yours,” Reid offered.
“Then the world came apart,” I said
“I don’t understand. What do you mean the world came apart?”
“At the time I didn’t know. I didn’t understand what was happening. Someone pulled me out of the gray, out of the vast nothingness. I’d never been so frightened, so confused, so scared.”
“I don’t understand. What happened?”
“I lost my father that day,” I said. “In truth, I lost myself somewhere in that large open space of darkness, of gray.”
“Trinity—”
“Everything tumbled down around me,” I continued, as if I didn’t hear Reid. If I stopped talking I’d never free this pain. “The earth quaked. The sky went dark. People started screaming. People fell from the sky.”
“People fell from the sky?”
“Bodies. They floated in the breeze. They wanted to fly away, but they couldn’t. We were never meant to float in the sky.”
Reid’s brow creased. “Trinity, I don’t understand.”
“The day was September eleventh, two thousand-one.”
Reid sat silent for a ceaseless moment.
“I’m so sorry, baby bird.” Reid’s hand skimmed my cheek, traced down the line of my neck then stopped. “Can I kiss you?”
“Why, Reid?”
“Because.” He paused for a moment. “I want to kiss you right now,” he said.
I glanced up and met Reid’s gaze. The moon enhanced the silver within his eyes. To me, his eyes danced. He wasn’t messing around. He was serious. A chill swept over my body.
Reid palmed my shoulder. It fit perfectly. “Let me kiss you, Trinity,” he said.
I closed my eyes in an attempt to find the strength to do this, to feel something real.
“All right,” I whispered.
Reid pulled me into his hold. He brushed his lips lightly over mine. My mouth parted. I opened to him. He molded his mouth to me. He slipped his tongue into my mouth, taking my tongue with his. I tasted him. Sweet, mixed with cinnamon.
I gave way to Reid. I would allow him to take me where he wanted to lead. He kissed me harder, deeper. His hands moved down my body. Soon, they made their way beneath my gown. Without hesitation, he located my breast. He cupped it in his hand, found my taut nipple, and squeezed it in between his fingers.
“Ah…” I moaned against his mouth.
“Am I hurting you?” he asked.
I shook my head. Welded my eyes shut, and felt the strength of his hand, the warmth of his hand, and an unfamiliar fiery sensation that blasted through me as he rolled my nipple. Reid’s mouth moved from my mouth. He located the column of my jaw and kissed.
I bound my fingers into Reid’s hair, and threw back my head, allowing him access to my flesh, my neck. Reid’s nose played in the hollow beneath my ear. He bit at my earlobe then flicked his tongue out, tasting me. He mapped my body with his tongue down to my throat where he kissed. He moved lower, and lower, until he came to my breasts.
“Reid…” I bit my lip, pulling it tight between my teeth. I wanted this.
“It’s okay,” he assured.
As he kissed me, his large hands slid over the contour of my neck and kept going until he nudged the material of my nightgown aside, and held both of my breasts. He pushed them together. Kissed the soft mounds of flesh before slipping his tongue down
and over, moving his hand to take one pert tip into his mouth. Reid circled his tongue around the bud, flicking the tip, then sucked my nipple.
I arched into his mouth and moaned. I wondered if this was really me, my sounds. My body flamed. Was I on fire? The sensations swirling through me as Reid worked my nipple with his mouth were so good.
“Reid, please…”
His name fell off my lips like a prayer. He moved his mouth to the other breast. He sucked that nipple while his free hand kneaded my right breast. He dined upon me. I writhed with every flick of his tongue, with every sensation of his suckling. His hands meandered lower.
I’d lost any fear of what I was doing. I wanted to feel more. I wanted Reid. I’d always wanted Reid. Part of me said this is a dream. And if this were a dream, I never wished to wake. He doesn’t love you, but I didn’t care why he was doing this. I could pretend. I didn’t need to pretend about loving him.
Stop this, Trinity that voice inside my head warned. He will only break your heart.
My hand slid down his shirt to the buttons. Reid pulled back and took my hands with his. He ripped the buttons of his shirt loose. I reached out for the pristine sun-kissed flesh of his chest. My hands shook, but I didn’t stop.
He was so different from me. He was strong, confident, and I wasn’t. The feel of his body was hard like steel wrapped beneath his flesh. I was soft. Where my body curved, he was straight. The lines of his body stretched tall, while the lines of my body were compact. He moved with precision and touched me with knowledge. I moved in apprehension and touched him in exploration of learning.
I felt the cut of his chest, the hard contour of his pectorals, the ripples of his stomach. I counted the ridges in my head, cataloging every curve of his body. Committing his body to memory. With my touch, the jerks and flexes of his muscles made themselves known beneath my hands, as he responded. For a moment euphoria danced through me because this was Reid, and he was responding, to me. Electricity flooded my body, wanting more.
We were impaired by our position on the bench. Reid lifted me up without effort. Cradled me with his arms. Carried me over to the patch of soft green grass where he laid me down. He placed me beneath the spread of the maple branches that darkened the ground in deep shadow. He placed my arms up over my head, crossed my wrists before he moved his hands down my skin. His hands roamed around then under my shoulder blades. He tilted me into an arch, which forced me to press my breasts out. Reid smiled.
By his expression and the way he looked at me, this position pleased him. I stayed that way.
I watched him tear the shirt from his body. He dropped it to the ground beside him. The light of the moon shone over his skin and captured me. I never wanted to look away from him. He unbuckled his belt in one smooth movement.
Reid kept his gaze upon my body as he moved his hand to unbutton his jeans. The clanking of his belt buckle sounded out before he completed the task. He kneeled down beside me. Placed his mouth to my hip, and kissed. Kissed my outer thigh. Reached up and pulled the front string of my nightgown, setting it free.
Reid completely exposed my breasts. He slid aside the material until my breasts, nipples taut, chest heaving, glowed in the light of the moon. He leaned over and began kissing them, caressing them, found the pink centers and teased them.
“Don’t stop,” I moaned.
I was caught somewhere between bliss and aching. I whimpered. Reid’s mouth engulfed my plea. His tongue speared me deeply, tangling with my tongue. I surrendered, completely, and without question.
Reid nibbled the line of my neck, my throat, my breasts, my ribs, down the length of my stomach, around my navel then his fingers weaved into the material of my sheer panties. In one tug, he pulled them off. My body quivered. Goose bumps splayed across my thighs, my stomach, my arms.
“Trinity, you are beautiful,” he said in a low raspy voice.
I closed my eyes. Tears flowed down my cheeks. I whispered, “Say it again.”
“You are beautiful.” He skimmed his mouth over my inner thighs, his tongue moving closer to my wanting. “So beautiful,” he murmured against my flesh.
I arched. My hands balled into fists. To me, the world slowed down. Time stood still. I held on to the feeling of the breeze as it blew over my body, his body, encasing us together beneath the beam of the moon.
The sway to the maple leaves dappled the shimmer of the shadowed moonlight across his face. I buried my fingers in his hair. The darkness enclosed the white of my fingers into blackness. Midnight, feeling of silk just like I’d always imagined.
Reid kissed across my inner thigh, obscuring the perfection of his face from my view. His lips moved so close to my wanting. I shook with intensity, with anticipation, then as if a gift, I felt his warm breath dash across my feminine secret.
“I-I,” I stuttered only to find I could not say I can’t.
“Don’t be afraid. Let me touch you,” Reid said.
His fingers strummed over my intimate folds. I bit at my bottom lip, more than conflicted. Part of me said this wasn’t right, not proper, but part of me begged for this and told my fear to shut the hell up. God, how I’d dreamed of this. His mouth on me, his tongue bringing me pleasure. I wasn’t sure what it would actually feel like, but I imagined.
I shook again as he embraced my legs, my thighs, spreading me open to his hunger. I did not tense. I did not fight. I spread for him. Reid groaned. He parted my petal soft flesh with his fingers and placed his tongue to my clit. I jerked at the foreign touch.
“Shh, baby bird. I’m going to lick you. Make you feel good. I promise you will like it. Relax and let me.”
The warmth of his breath along with the vibration of his voice buzzed across my intimate space. A spasm rocked my body, shivered between my legs, and gathered moisture there. I wondered if the moisture was normal. Maybe Reid would be repulsed? But he didn’t seem to be repulsed.
Reid swiped his warm tongue over my budding clit once, twice. I moaned. My head fell back. My curls splayed across the ground. My legs relaxed. I opened farther. He pressed harder, lashing my clit with his tongue, swiping, twirling, and sucking. Reid cursed under his breath as he supped.
I was undecided. Was this heaven or hell? I’d never experienced such a feeling. I knew this was too good to be right, too right to be wrong. Thoughts bounced through my head, pinging back and forth. Good girls don’t do this, but I didn’t care. By my fantasies alone I couldn’t truly be considered a good girl. But as in everything else, I wasn’t sure my fantasies were normal. Being a virgin isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. I was eighteen, more than old enough to do this.
Reid nuzzled my clit in a swirl. My hips shot up. I pressed into Reid’s mouth with the knowledge I should be mortified at my behavior, but I wasn’t, I required more.
“That’s it, Trinity,” Reid encouraged. He licked me. “Feel good. Don’t hold back, don’t be scared.”
Reid tucked the tip of his tongue into my snug opening. I wasn’t sure what to do. Move or lie still. He glided his tongue up my pussy, riding the wave of my pleasure until he found my swollen tip. He took my clit between his lips, sucking on it until I bucked and writhed upon his mouth and tongue.
“You want this.” Reid growled the words into my spread parts.
My head whipped from side to side, unsure of the intense pleasure.
“Tell me you want this,” he demanded with the lash of his tongue.
“Um…” I bit at my lip, my body tensed, my thighs shook. “Yes.”
As though a reward for my answer, Reid increased the pace. I marveled in the feel, the flat of Reid’s tongue, licking me in long hungry strokes over and over. He twirled around my pert flesh, sucking my enflamed nub. I felt teeth as he bit, lips as he sucked, tongue as he flicked me in quick movements before moving back into long strokes. Reid grabbed my hips. He lifted me up, pulling me forward into his mouth.
“Trinity,” he growled as he devoured me.
Something flowed through
my body. Whatever it was, burned. It was a building sensation as wave upon wave began to crash against me. I was scared of the feeling, unsure. I wanted to come apart, explode.
“Reid!” I cried out, needing assurance, “I … um …”
“It’s okay; I want you to come on my tongue.”
Reid placed my clit between his teeth. He bit softly then sucked harder and harder before flicking my clit. He sucked, pulling my clit, tugging at it. My body bucked. He held me there, suspended within the pleasure. With one sucking twirl of his tongue, I exploded.
“Oh!” I cried and wrenched upward. The exquisite pleasure rolled through my body. It rumbled like thunder then burst outward, upward, and rested before the feeling transitioned into a throb that slowed into a quiver.
He yanked his jeans down over his thighs, hard and ready. He grabbed at his erection, slid up between my trembling thighs, and allowed the hardness of his manhood to ride the slick folds of my pussy. Reid placed his mouth to the pulse in my throat.
“Kiss me,” I said.
Reid rode my tongue like he rode my pussy. His cock jerked between my feminine crease. If I didn’t know better, I’d think he was holding himself back. I wanted him to plunge into my tightness. He was as hard as steel, slick, and wet from my juices. Why was he waiting? Finally, he glided to my wanting, pressed himself toward the goal. His rock hard cock felt like a weapon against my small opening. This was probably going to hurt, but I didn’t care. I wanted him.
“Reid, make love to me, please,” I begged.
His muscles flexed, bulged in his shoulders. He moved against my untouched opportunity. I was his for the taking. The residual spasms of my orgasm quivered against him.
“Please…” I moaned as I lifted my temptation to him.
“Trinity,” he groaned.
He grabbed my hands, pinned them in one of his hands over my head. He growled, pressed forward, and bit the crook of my neck. I cried out. My hard nipples brushed across his steely chest when I writhed against him.
The Good Sister: Part One Page 5