I took Reed to The Pit, one of the newest, coolest barbeque places in town with its down home décor, large outdoor patio with dance floor and stage where live bands performed almost every night.
“You’ll love it,” I said with a smile.
Reed’s gaze moved over the large tin roofed building with the American and Texas flags flying at the entrance. “I already do.”
I couldn’t help but smile at the pleasure in his voice. “It opened last August and it’s been one of my favorite places ever since.”
Reed got out of the car, and before I knew what he meant to do he was opening my door for me and placing his big hand at the small of my back as we walked toward the restaurant. A warm fire unfurled in my lower belly, and I felt all tingly and alive beside Reed.
He towered over my slender five-foot-four frame, making me feel delicate beside him. Beneath his shirt his muscles bunched, rippled and tapered over his cut abs. I tried not to stare, but my eyes kept flicking over his chiseled body.
Reed was watching me with a knowing-look in his deep, ocean blue eyes and I knew he was aware of the affect he had on me. I thought I caught him checking me out with a similar look, but I wasn’t sure.
We both ordered the special, which was sliced beef, sausage, potato salad, coleslaw, a roll and sweet tea. Taking a table on the outside deck, we sat down to eat just as the live band began another song.
To distract myself, I asked him the question that I’d been curious about for years. “What made you decide to join the army?”
Reed’s hand, which was holding the salt, stilled and he seemed to consider the question. It was a moment before he answered. “I didn’t have any money for college, and I knew I had to do something. Four more years and they’ll pay my way through college.”
“Four more years?” I hoped he didn’t hear the disappointment in my voice, but I knew that he did.
“I just signed on for the additional four.” He didn’t seem happy about it, and I was suddenly sad. “It’s my turn to ask you a question.”
“You want to know why I’m going to school to be a nurse?”
He shook his head, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “I think I already know the answer to that, stop me if I’m wrong. You like helping people and it gives you a sense of satisfaction to know that you’ve made a difference in someone’s life.”
I smiled. “You’re good.”
His eyes darkened. “Not always, Ellie.”
“You’re flirting with me again?”
“Is that okay?” His eyes locked with mine.
“It’s okay.” The words shook a little.
“You still have your dog, Jack?”
I couldn’t help but smile to know that he remembered my dog, and I wondered if he ever thought of that stormy afternoon when he’d driven me home. “Jack lives with Dad, but I see them as much as I can.”
“I always wanted a dog.”
“Maybe one day you’ll have one.”
“Maybe.”
“Do you want to get married?” I asked, curious about his plans for the future. Unfortunately, as soon as I asked the question I realized how it might sound to him. My cheeks began to burn with embarrassment.
Reed stopped chewing, swallowed and grinned. “I’ll be overseas for the next few years but what the hell, if you want we can fly to Vegas.”
It took me a moment to realize how he’d misunderstood my question. “I meant one day. Do you want to get married and have a family one day, but not with me,” I said, stumbling over my own words. “Not that I wouldn’t want to marry you, but, well, you know what I mean.”
Reed seemed like he was trying not to smile.
I put my hand over my face, and laughed along with him. “I’m making a fool of myself.”
“It’s okay. I have that affect on women,” Reed replied, sitting up a little straighter.
“At least you’re used to it,” I told him, but I didn’t like thinking of other women making throwing themselves at Reed.
The sound of his deep laughter seemed to tickle my skin and goose bumps popped over my flesh.
“I was joking, Ellie. I’m not that full of myself.”
“I didn’t think that. You’re gorgeous and I can see women falling all over themselves for you.”
I’d surprised him again. “You’re the one that’s gorgeous, and you don’t even seem to know it.”
I laughed nervously, ducking my head.
Reed reached across the table and took my hand. “You have no idea how desirable you are, do you?”
“Reed, I appreciate it but you don’t have to say that.”
“After everyone thought you wrote that letter practically asking me to take your virginity, guys went crazy over you and wanted to volunteer to take my place if I wasn’t interested. Every time I heard someone talking about you that way, I was mad as hell. I threatened to kick the ass of anyone that touched you.”
I was stunned. I’d had no idea.
“There’s something about you, Ellie McAllister. I knew it four years ago, and you turned me inside out. That’s why I never spoke to you again after that day. I felt guilty for thinking about you the way I did. I had a girlfriend, and you were only fourteen and too innocent to know what you did to me.”
I swallowed the knot of emotion in my throat. “You were attracted to me?” This was something I couldn’t wrap my mind around, because I’d always assumed my feeling for Reed were one sided.
“Yes. I’m not proud of it. You were too young for me.”
“I always thought it was just me. When I’m around you, I’m so aware of you that I can hardly think straight,” I told him, watching his eyes heat.
“Don’t say anything else,” Reed replied, looking almost as if he was in pain.
I frowned, worried I’d revealed too much.
His eyes darkened. “I haven’t been with a woman in a long time. You shouldn’t say stuff like that to me when we’re in public.”
All of the sudden, I knew exactly what I wanted from Reed tonight, and I’d never been surer of anything. “Cora is in Austin this weekend. Do you want to come to my place?”
“I think you already know the answer to that.”
I stood up so quickly I knocked over my chair, but Reed caught it, with super-quick reflexes, before it reached the deck. He took my hand and I thought we were leaving, but he led me onto the dance floor and pulled me into my arms. Reed moved effortlessly to the beat of the music, and his body felt incredible pressed up against mine. Resisting the urge to bury my head against his chest, I concentrated on the steps and prayed I didn’t stomp on his foot.
“Ellie, I’m leaving in three days and I don’t know when I’ll be back.”
He left it unspoken, but I knew what he was trying to tell me. We’d have only tonight, nothing more, and he was giving me time to change my mind.
I looked into his eyes. “If we don’t have much time, then we shouldn’t waste it.”
We didn’t wait for the song to end. Taking my hand he led me down the ramp, toward the parking lot, then he stopped, turned and gently pushed me up against the building. His gaze dropped to my mouth, and my knees went weak with anticipation. Reed was going to kiss me. His mouth captured mine, kissing me deeply enough that my heart raced and shimmers of excitement shot down my spine.
Later, I’d wonder how we ever made it to my apartment.
As soon as we shut the apartment door, Reed hauled me into his arms again and we kissed some more, unable to get enough of each other. I’m not sure I remember how we got to my room, but I do recall falling into my bed with Reed on top of me. We touched and kissed and stripped each other bare until we were both shaking with need.
“Ellie, are you sure?” Reed asked in a strained voice. His arms were braced on either side of me, as he looked down at me with a hunger in his dark blue eyes that I felt as well.
“I want you, Reed. Please.”
That was all the encouragement he needed. Reed b
uried himself inside of me, taking my virginity in one sure, swift stroke.
I flinched.
Reed froze.
After a moment he said my name and it sounded pained, as if it had been physically torn from him.
“I’m okay,” I whispered, sliding my hands down the smooth, taut muscles of his back.
Reed swore. “I should have known you were a virgin.” He started to withdraw, but I reached up and held him tightly against me.
“No,” I pleaded. “Finish what you started. Please.”
He looked uncertain, his eyes searching mine, and then he started to move within me, slowly at first until all of the sudden he pulled out of me and rolled onto his side. “Shit! I don’t have a condom.”
“Nightstand,” I told him.
He opened the nightstand drawer and retrieved a jumbo-sized box of condoms. His gaze shot to mine, and I read the question in his eyes.
“My cousin Brooke gave them to me as a housewarming present.”
“I’ll have to remember to thank her for that,” he said dryly.
I laughed. “Just don’t do it in front of my dad.”
“Don’t mention your dad now. He’ll likely want to shoot my ass if he finds out about this.”
We both laughed. Then we made the sweetest love. Afterward, Reed held me against him as if he treasured me and pressed a light kiss to my temple while he stroked my hair. I felt safe and happy and peaceful.
All night long we talked and laughed and made love. Reed was worried about hurting me, but I was insistent that I was fine. “If tonight is all we have then I want to make the most of it.” Later I asked, “Won’t Isabelle wonder where you are?”
Reed hesitated before answering. “She’ll think I’m with Amber.”
The last time we made love that night, Reed looked into my eyes and I shook my head. “You don’t have to say it. I already know.”
He frowned. “What is it you think you know?”
“This is just for one night.”
“Ellie—“
I pressed my fingers to his lips then kissed him into silence. Tomorrow would come soon enough and I wasn’t going to regret anything or spoil the time we had with talk of the future.
The next morning Reed sat on the edge of my bed, looking grim. When he saw that I was awake he asked quietly, “You okay?”
“I feel incredible.”
“Any regrets?”
“How can I regret something that makes me feel this amazing? I wish we had more time.”
He moved beside me on the bed and took me into his arms. “I want to see you again before I leave.”
“No.” The single word was difficult to say, but I knew it was for the best.
He frowned and looked uncertain. “I don’t mean I want to have sex with you. I just want to be with you.”
“I know what you meant, and it’d be too hard. Plus, you should spend the time with Isabelle. Thank you for tonight, Reed,” I said dropping a kiss on his mouth. “I’ll never forget it.”
Reed gave me his AKO email address before he left, and he called several times over the next three days. On the day he left, I broke down and cried. Cora came home from school, and I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I told her everything, and she hugged me and told me it would all be okay. She bought plenty of chocolate, coffee and a dozen sappy, romantic movies that were our favorites.
Two days later I pulled myself together and went on with my life, but I’d still think of Reed occasionally and remember that wonderful, bittersweet night I spent in his arms.
Chapter 3
2 years later
“Brown or blue eyes?”
I glanced over at Cora, who was eyeing at couple of guys at the bar. “Are you picking out a date or a doll?” I joked.
“You’re not funny,” Cora said, but she laughed.
“She is kind of funny,” Isabelle added, spotting the cowboys that Cora was watching and smiling. “If Ellie’s not interested, I’ll split them with you. I like blue and brown eyes.”
“Their backs are to us and you can’t see their eyes,” I said, laughing at the absurdity of the conversation that was typical for three of us.
“With the way they fill out those jeans, who gives a damn about eyes.” Isabelle took a pull of her longneck. “Check out those butts—small, tight, round. I’d give the guy in the dark jeans a ten. The babe in the faded jeans is off the charts. I call dibs on him.”
“How would you feel if a guy was ogling you like a piece of meat?”
Isabelle peeled the wrapper off of her beer bottle, while she thought about the question. “I doubt I’d know about it, and if I did it wouldn’t bother me. That’s honest, right? Better to know he’s with me because of my hot bod than to think he actually cares and wait until I fall in love with him to break my heart.”
Both Cora and I started to speak, but Isabelle cut us off.
“No drama tonight, girls. I just want to have fun, and I definitely don’t want to think about Scott.”
Cora shot me a questioning look and we’d been friends long enough that I knew what she was silently asking me, ‘Is she okay?’
I wasn’t sure of the answer, but I understood that Isabelle wanted to have some fun without having us fuss over her all night. I nodded at Cora, and she went back to watching the cowboys.
“Dark Jeans has blue eyes and Faded Jeans has brown. I noticed as they passed us. Eyes are always what I notice first about a guy.”
“Seriously?” Isabelle flipped her long, straight, shiny black hair. “I always notice how tall they are, then I do my ABC’s—abs, butt and chest.”
Cora and I laughed.
“What about you, Ellie?”
“I also notice eyes, but the ABC’s sound interesting.”
Isabelle frowned. “I feel like I’m a bad influence on you two virgins.”
I felt Cora’s eyes on me and knew she was likely giving me the same concerned look she’d given Isabelle. We never talked about that night I spent with Reed, but Cora knew that I hadn’t forgotten him. Picking up my beer, I tilted the bottle to my lips and took a drink of the lukewarm liquid.
“Why are you looking at Ellie like that?” Isabelle asked, as if she knew something was off. “You are still hanging on to your V-card, right?”
The question caught me off guard, and I looked into her eyes unable to lie.
Isabelle’s dark blue eyes, so much like her brother’s, fastened on me. “Holy shit! You slept with Davis?”
I choked on my beer. Davis Buchanan was a guy I’d dated for a couple of months last year, but he broke up with me after he’d met my cousin Brooke and now they were planning a wedding. Luckily, I’d never slept with Davis.
“You told Cora and not me?” Isabelle asked, hurt.
I opened my mouth to tell her I’d never slept with Davis, but Cora spoke first.
“I found out by accident,” Cora lied smoothly. “You know how Ellie never likes to talk about herself. If I hadn’t of come home early that day, I’d never have known.”
“You walked in on them?” Isabelle asked, fascinated.
I saw the flash of uncertainty in Cora’s green eyes, but I gave her I nod of encouragement. Isabelle was too smart and knew Cora and I too well to believe I was still a virgin so, what difference did it make if Isabelle thought I’d slept with Davis if it took the hurt out of her eyes.
“Did you actually see them naked?”
“I’m glad ya’ll are enjoying yourselves at my expense.” I tried to sound irritated when I was really relieved. “Focus, ladies.” I nodded in the direction of Dark and Faded Jeans who were taking a seat by the dance floor. And with that redirection, all talk of my currently non-existent sex life ended.
Several guys stopped to stare at Isabelle; she had that the kind of heart-stopping beauty that made people notice her. Cora and I got a few looks as well. Together, we made a striking threesome—a raven-haired beauty, beautiful red head, and a blonde.
Isabelle wa
s the stunning, dark haired beauty, tall and slender with legs that women envied and me likely imagined wrapped around them. Guys usually approached Isabelle first, probably because of her vibrant, outgoing personality. Something about her attracted people and made them want to be around her. It was the same magnetic appeal that her brother possessed.
Cora was as striking as Isabelle. When we were younger Cora had jokingly referred to herself as the ugly duckling, and now she was most definitely a beautiful swan. I couldn’t wait for our high school reunion so that Cora could show up and amaze everyone that had once been mean to her. Cora’s hair, which had once been the color of a carrot, was now a deep, burnished auburn. She’d gotten contacts after graduation and now, along with perfect skin, Cora’s sea-green eyes were one of her best features.
I wasn’t sure how to describe myself. I have blue eyes, blonde hair that never needs highlights (I’m thankful for that), but my locks have a mind, or you could say a wave of their own, and they don’t like to be tamed. They’re always escaping a ponytail and have declared a personal war with the flat iron.
My skin is clear, but I have duck mouth—my top lip is slightly fuller than my lower lip. My Aunt Lacy says that I could fix my mouth with collagen injections, but my dad said not to listen to her and that I’m beautiful as I am. Of course, he’s my dad and has to tell me stuff like that, but I still love hearing it and I love him.
Running is one of my favorite things to do when I need to think, and because of it, I don’t have to watch my weight. My chest is small, but I’m happy with my 32B bra size and would never want to change it. Mama used to tell me to love myself, and I try to do that. I’d never want to change anything about me even the flaws.
“What happened to Amber? I thought she was meeting us here.” Cora glanced at Isabelle.
“She wanted to stop by the hospital and visit Reed.”
My heart tripped a beat just hearing his name.
I refused to look over at Cora, knowing that she would be watching me with the same concern she directed at Isabelle whenever someone brought up Scott. Cora knew me better than anyone so I didn’t really understand her friend radar going all red-alert whenever Reed’s name was mentioned because Cora, of all people, should have known I was strong enough not to fall apart whenever I heard the name of my ex-lover.
Fireflies From Heaven Page 3