by Rose Gordon
He was tempted to turn on his heel and return to the stables right then. It’d be better than the torture he was about to endure. But he’d promised her he’d come eat with her, so even if it might kill him to do so, he’d eat with her. He didn’t promise he’d enjoy it, though.
“There you are,”Jessie said, flinging the door open. She grabbed his wrist and tried to pull him inside.
Joel didn’t budge. He couldn’t move a muscle. Nor could he take his eyes off the beautiful woman standing before him clad in a green silk dressing robe with her wet, red hair hanging long over her shoulders.
“You look beautiful,”he breathed before he could stop himself.
“Thank you.”She blushed.“I couldn’t get any of my other dresses on…”
Joel nodded and followed her outstretched finger to where four gowns and another purse were draped on top of her bed. He frowned. He might be only a man, one who’d never helped a woman into or out of a dress, but none of those looked as if they required help. He looked down at the siren standing before him. What was her game? Jessie doesn’t play games. Not that kind. If she wants something, she says it.“Let’s eat.”
Jessie flinched, then smiled.“You have to come inside the room to do that.”
“I don’t haveto,”he muttered, brushing past her.
“Yah, ya do,”Jessie said, mimicking Joel’s mother’s German accent.
Joel’s irritation faded.“You do that so well,”he said with a laugh.
Jessie curtsied.“Thank you.”She walked over to the table and patted the back of one of the chairs.“Have a seat.”
Joel obeyed.
Jessie took her seat opposite him.“I miss her.”
“So do I.”Joel watched Jessie smooth her napkin over her lap.“She’d have had a fit, you know.”
A line formed between Jessie’s eyebrows.“About what?”
“Me taking you to Charleston.”
Jessie scoffed.“A fit? She’d have taken a switch to us both.”She giggled.“And you’d have had to snort like a pig and blink your eyes like a fan to keep from crying.”
“Didn’t you?”Joel asked, arching a brow at her.
“No.”She lifted the silver dome off her dinner plate full of beans, potatoes, and a thin slice of ham.“After the first time we got caught swimming in the creek together, I started bringing an extra shirtwaist with me to tuck into my drawers.”
Joel’s jaw dropped.“That’s how you did that?”He shook his head in amazement.“I always wondered why it always seemed I was getting hurt more than you. I just assumed it was because I had to go first.”
“No.”Mischief danced in Jessie’s emerald eyes.“Mutti was always so concerned with propriety that when she made me redress before she spanked us, I’d tuck my extra shirt in the back of my drawers. She never knew the difference.”
Joel removed his silver dome, revealing a thick cut of meat and a cloud of potatoes.“Thank you.”He meant it, too. He’d been nearly starved today. Well, maybe not starved, but his stomach wouldn’t have any difficulty holding that steak.“I tried a book once.”
“A book?”Jessie asked around a mouth of potatoes.
Joel cut the tip off his steak and popped it into his mouth.“I shoved a book in the back of my trousers.”
Did she tell your father?”
“No.”He shook his head at the memory and cut off another piece of his steak.“She laughed.”
Jessie reached for her water.“She was always laughing.”
“Except when we were being indecent,”Joel said with a chuckle.
“I still don’t know what’s so indecent about the two of us swimming in the creek.”
“We were wearing only our underwear.”
Jessie shrugged.
“The water made them transparent.”
Again, Jessie shrugged.
Joel scooped up a forkful of potatoes and brought them to his mouth.“You really are indecent,”he teased.
“I wouldn’t have swam in my underwear with just anyone,”Jessie said, crossing her arms.“I didn’t think you were looking at…at…my…”Her face flushed crimson.
Joel shifted uncomfortably in his chair, his head filling with memories he never wanted to forget.“I didn’t stare at you, no,”he said at last.“But it didn’t mean they weren’t visible.”
If Joel thought Jessie were one prone to swooning, he’d have been to her side in a trice to keep her upright. Instead, she held her seat and opened and closed her mouth like a fish.
Fortunately, they were both spared having to embarrass themselves when a hard knock shook the door to their rented room.
“Who’s there,”Joel demanded, pushing to his feet. Nobody should be knocking on Jessie’s door.
“Hot water,”came a muffled voice from the other side of the door.
“Hot water?”Joel was to the door in three steps and swung it open without ceremony.
A burly man holding two buckets of steaming water greeted Joel on the other side of the door.“For your bath,”the man said, lifting one of the buckets for emphasis.
Joel frowned.“She’s already had her bath.”
“But you haven’t.”Jessie came to stand by Joel and gave him a little nudge to the side.“Come inside. The tub is by the vanity.”
The man pushed past them and carried his buckets of water to the tub.
Joel crossed his arms.“What are you doing?”he asked through a clenched jaw.
“You need a bath, too.”
“No, I don’t.”
Jessie sniffed the air in front of him.“Yeah, you do.”
Joel didn’t find her nearly as humorous as she seemed to find herself.“Then I’ll get one when I’m ready.”
“Why wait?”she asked with a shrug, then gestured to the tub.“One’s ready for you.”
“I can think of a thousand reasons to wait.”All of which had to do with his feelings for her.
“I hope you don’t plan to list them all.”She twisted a lock of her hair around her finger.“The water won’t be warm past number eighty-two.”
“Has anyone ever told you that you’re insufferable?”
“Yeah. But I didn’t believe you the first time you said it, and I don’t believe it now.”
“Well, you should.”On their own accord, his eyes strayed to the waiting tub. How long had it been since he’d had a hot bath? Too long. Heating water for a bath took time. Something he’d rather not waste on a luxury that could be accomplished far easier down in the creek.
“When are you going to put aside your pride, Joel?”
Joel blinked down at Jessie.“I have put aside my pride,”he said flatly.“But putting aside my clothes is something else.”
“Is that what you’re worried about?”she asked with a slight laugh.“As you reminded me a few minutes ago, my parts were visible—”her eyes drifted down to his waist— “and so were yours.”
“I’m not worried about you seeing my parts.”He doubted any man existed who cared about such things when it came to the woman he loved. Loved. His heart slammed painfully into his ribs. This could not be happening.“I need to go.”
~*~
Jessie’s mind raced. She was losing him and needed to think of something fast to keep him in her room.
The way he’d held her earlier gave her hope that maybe…
Tears welled in her eyes. She cursed herself, never in her life could she remember being on the verge of tears as often as she had been the past two days. The hard expression on his face told her she’d misunderstood earlier. Joel wouldn’t think of her that way. They were only friends. And that wasn’t even such a strong bond. Go away, Jessie. I’m a man now. I ain’t got time for playing with a little girl.
The memory of Joel’s words stung as much now as they had when he said them.
“You’re right.”She took a step back, then another.“You need to go.”
“I—I’ll see you in the morning.”
Jessie murmured something resembling goodnight, th
en stood motionless as Joel left her room without another word.
Chapter Nine
With any luck this would be the final day of traveling to Charleston with Jessie. Joel had gotten up as soon as the first rays of light filtered through the windows of the stables. As he’d promised, he mucked the stalls, fed all the animals, refilled the water trough, and brushed the innkeeper’s horse in exchange for a room for Jessie and dinner. As other travelers came in throughout the night, Joel would offer to see after their horses for fifty cents. Five dollars worth of coins now jangled in his pocket.
Upstairs, Jessie was packed and ready to travel the last seventeen miles to Charleston when he opened the door to her room.
The ride was quiet.
Too quiet.
And then, it wasn’t…
“Why haven’t you married?”
Joel wished for the silence to return.“The same reason you didn’t,”he said casually.“No one in town suited my fancy.”He whipped his head around to face her.“Are you reconsidering showing me Mr. Perfect’s letter so I might be able to post a proper ad?”
“You could certainly use some of his charm, but no.”
Joel snorted.“I doubt he wrote the letters himself anyway.”
“Why wouldn’t he have written it himself?”
“I already told you. No man is a perfect gentleman.”He spotted a pond off the road just ahead and slowed the horses.“Nor do I think you’d want one.”
“Shows what you know about women.”
“Guess that’s why I’m still not married.”He loosened his hold on the reins to allow the horses easier access to the water.
“And with your cynical attitude, I think it’s safe to assume you’ll remain that way for a while longer.”
“Fine by me.”The last thing he needed was a woman milling around his house and blabbing his business around town.“Why the sudden curiosity, Jess? You vying for the position?”
“Of Mrs. Joel Cunningham? Absolutely not.”
Joel’s grip momentarily tightened on the leather reins. Need she be so adamant as to add the‘“absolutely?”He forced a lopsided shrug.“That’s too bad.”
~*~
Jessie’s mind spun in a thousand directions. Did he mean…? Equal parts frustration and excitement coursed through her. One minute Joel would say something that made her think he thought of her as only a childhood friend, and other times…Well, frankly, other times it seemed like he was ready to kiss her senseless. She’d certainly like the latter, but would die of embarrassment if she assumed he had such an interest in her.
Enough was enough. She’d ask him. If he did see her romantically they could turn this wagon around right now. And if he declined such an interest she’d be gone tomorrow and would never have to look at him ever again.
“Joel, would you want me to be your Mrs. Cunningham?”
“Did Jessie Wilcox just propose to me?”Joel wondered aloud, steering the horses away from the pond and back to the road.
Every drop of blood in her body rushed to Jessie’s face.“You’re the one who said it was too bad that I wasn’t vying to be your Mrs. Cunningham,”she defended.
“Because you could have saved me the time of having to ponder over what to put in my ad. Not to mention the expense of paper and postage.”
His words couldn’t have been more painful had he tried to be so cruel. She blinked rapidly to keep the tears that were stinging her eyes from falling.“Sorry to disappoint.”
Joel didn’t respond.
~*~
Joel couldn’t respond. His cold remark had been uncalled for. But he couldn’t take it back. Not now. Jessie deserved to be happy. Not that that meant for her to have to travel by train to the wilds and marry a stranger, but it also didn’t mean marrying her girlhood playmate because he was the convenient choice.
Nor would he allow her to. If she wanted to be his wife, it’d be because she wanted to and made no secret of it. Not because marriage to him was the lesser of two evils.
That still didn’t give him any right or reason to be so cold to her.
“I’m sorry, Jess,”he whispered.“That wasn’t the right thing to say.”
“It’s all right.”Her tone belied her words.“I’m used to your thoughtless remarks.”
“Good thing one of us is. They get me into trouble more times than they deflect it.”
Jessie snapped her fingers.“That’s where we’ll start.”
“Pardon? What?”
“With your ad.”Jessie opened her purse and pulled out a piece of paper. After scowling at it for a minute, she flipped it over and fished out a pencil.“All right, let’s see…”She tapped her pencil against her jaw.“Tall.”
Joel snorted.
“Do you disagree?”
After a decade of being able to see the tops of everyone’s head he passed by, he couldn’t possibly disagree.“No. But do women actually care about that?”
“The ones looking for a husband in the newspaper do.”
He couldn’t argue that.
“Mountain of a man seeks wife—”
“Don’t write that!”
She huffed.“What’s wrong with that? It’s accurate.”She shook her pencil at him.“You wouldn’t want some simpering miss to run away screaming when she sees you, would you?”
“Well, no.”Not that it’d be the first time his size had scared someone away from him.
“What kind of wife are you looking for?”
You.“Umm…I don’t know.”
“That’s not much to work with, Joel.”
“Your sarcasm is refreshing, Jessie,”he said, matching her snide tone.
“Hmmm…”She scribbled something down. Then sighed. Then stared out in front of them for a while, not that there was much to see other than dust and trees. Then wrote something else down…
Then repeated the process.
Twice.
“I think I have it.”
Joel groaned.
“Stop that. You’re the one who mentioned writing an ad.”
“You and I both know I didn’t mean it.”
“Oh, I see,”she dragged out her words as if to say she didn’t really believe him.
“I don’t need a wife.”
“What was it you told me the other day? Something about if I keep repeating something to myself, maybe even I’ll believe it some day?”
Joel grinned. He missed this. All of it. Throwing his hands up into the air, he said,“I concede.”
“Good. Now, listen to your ad. Mountain of a man seeks wife. Young and of able body, never married and without any attachments—seeking a similar wife.”
“It took you an hour to come up with that?”
Giggling, Jessie threw her palms up in a similar manner.“You know I’m not a writer.”
“You don’t say,”Joel remarked dryly.
“No, I can saya lot. I just can’t write it.”She set her pencil and paper down beside her and started digging in her purse again.“Do you really want to hear Caleb’s letters?”
“No. They’re private.”It was bad enough to know Mr. Perfect had swept her off her feet, knowing how he did it was of no interest to him.
“Joel?” Jessie shrieked, clutching onto him.
From the corner of his eye he saw a deer no less than ten feet ahead darting out of the trees and straight toward the road. He pulled on the reins and the horses whinnied loudly, stopping within inches of where the deer had pranced just a moment before.
“Are you all right?”he asked breathlessly, wrapping his arm around Jessie.
She nodded.
He patted her arm and pulled her close.“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.”She burrowed in closer to him.
“I’m sorry.”He idly rubbed her arm.“Had I seen him earlier I’d have stopped sooner.”
She patted his knee.“I know. Go check the horses.”
He set the brake and jumped down. The horses were fine. The wagon was not.
The
front right wheel was leaning on its side.
“Broken axle?”Jessie guessed, coming to stand next to where he was assessing the damage.
Joel stepped closer to it and eyed the axle.“Broke clean off.”He pulled his hat off and slapped it on his knee.“Sorry, Jess.”
“Don’t be sorry. We’re still alive.”
“And a good three miles away from the next town.”He put his hat back on and untied the horses.“Biscuits and Gravy haven’t been ridden in a few years—”
“Then perhaps we shouldn’t ride them now,”Jessie cut in. The last time she’d ridden Biscuits he’d nearly bucked her off. The horse was about as temperamental as the man who’d bought him. And for good reason, she supposed. Mr. Cunningham had been just as unkind to his horses as he had to his own son.
“As the lady wishes,”Joel said, relief stamped all over his face. He held the reins to Biscuits and Gravy in one hand and offered her his other arm.“Shall I escort you to town, my lady?”
“It’d be my pleasure, kind sir.”
~*~
Would it be in bad taste if Jessie were excited about this delay?
Or worse, if she secretly hoped it’d take them all afternoon to get to this nearest town?
She remembered quite vividly the way he’d rebuffed her earlier, and she knew it was foolish to hope he’d change his mind. But what if…
She peeked up at him. Wearing clothes that were no less than three days old and having had no bath in at least the same amount of time, he was still devilishly handsome. Of course that had more to do with his tanned skin, angular jaw, deep blue eyes, and dark brown hair than his attire. She’d always thought he was the most handsome boy in the county and foolishly hoped one day he’d ask her to marry him. He’d been right earlier, some of the younger girls back home were terrified by Joel’s size. But not her. Her lips twitched. Even his shadow dwarfed hers. What those scared little girls didn’t realize was that Joel was the kindest, gentlest soul she’d ever met. Just the opposite of either of their fathers.
“Joel, do you ever miss your father?”