Resting my weight on one arm, I reached between us and closed my hand over hers. She let me guide her into just the right rhythm, and when my breath caught, when I shuddered, she took over, squeezing a little harder and moving a little faster.
That’s right. That’s the woman I know. Oh, fucking hell…
“God, yes, just like that,” I breathed.
“Like that?”
Closing my eyes, I moaned something that hopefully came across as a “yes.”
Our lips were nearly touching, and I felt more than heard her murmur, “Get on your back.”
Though I loved what she was doing, hell if I was going to argue with that request. Together we rolled over, and I shivered when she pinned my arms to the bed. She kissed me hard, her tongue demanding access to my mouth. I opened and closed my fists, but she kept me pinned down. We both knew I could have overpowered her and freed my arms if I’d wanted to, but I didn’t. I wouldn’t.
After a moment, she pushed herself up and looked down at me, wetting her lips. “I want—” She stopped abruptly.
“Tell me,” I whispered.
She bit her lip, wavering between bold and tentative. Then she took a breath, looked me in the eye, and blurted out, “I want to suck your cock.” As soon as the words were out, she looked away and her cheeks colored.
“Is that really what you want?” I asked.
Still avoiding my eyes, she nodded.
“Look at me, Meredith,” I said softly.
With much effort, she did, concerned creases forming between her eyebrows. I wondered what she thought I would do or say. If she was worried because she’d expressed her own desire to do something, or if she was just embarrassed at having said it. What’s going on in that haunted mind of yours, baby?
I pulled one arm free and reached for her face. I half-expected her to flinch away from my touch, but when she didn’t, I gently drew her down to me.
“If that’s what you want,” I said, my lips brushing hers, “I’m not going to stop you.”
To my great relief, she laughed. So did I, and the tension melted away.
“Well,” she said, “I suppose I’ve never known you to turn down a blowjob.”
I grinned. “Did you think I’d start now?”
“Absolutely not.” She sat up. Then she swallowed hard. “This may sound weird, but while I’m…” Her gaze darted toward my cock, then met my eyes again. “Would you mind keeping your hands up here? Like, on the headboard?”
I glanced up at the headboard slats, then looked at her with raised eyebrows. “If that’s what you want, yeah, I can do that.”
She nodded. “Thank you.”
“Can I ask why?”
“Do I have to explain it?”
I swallowed. I could read between the lines well enough, and asking me to keep my hands on the headboard wasn’t exactly the strangest thing anyone had ever asked me to do.
I smiled and reached up to grab on to the slats. “You don’t have to explain anything.”
She bit her lip, sending an uncertain look toward my hands. “You won’t let go?”
“Do you trust me?”
“Of course.” Another glance at my hands.
“Would you be more comfortable if I let you cuff me to the bed?”
She laughed quietly. “Are you serious?”
I shrugged. “Whatever makes you comfortable, babe.”
Her laughter faded. “I don’t think cuffs will be necessary.”
“You trust me, then?”
She looked me in the eye. “Yes, I do.” She kissed me, trailing her fingertips along the underside of my erection.
I shivered. “If you’re going to touch me like that, I am all yours.”
Something flickered across her expression, something there and gone too quickly for me to be sure it was ever there at all. Before I could ask, she shot me a devilish grin, kissed me quickly, then moved down by my hips. No long trail of kisses until she got to my cock, she was going straight for it.
Oh, hell yes. I closed my eyes. Anticipation made breathing damn near impossible as I waited for that first delicious contact with her mouth.
Still stroking me slowly, she said, “There’s one more thing I need to ask first.”
You want me to think while you’re touching me like that? I looked down at her, licking my dry lips. “Go ahead.”
“Don’t move. At all.”
Another puzzling request, but one I wouldn’t ask her to explain this minute, not while she had the boldness to make this move at all. And if her mouth was still as talented as it had been a lifetime ago, her request would be one tall order.
“Scott?”
I nodded. “I won’t move. I promise.”
She cast one last wary glance at my hands. Evidently certain they were bound, if only by my word and not a pair of cuffs, she came up and kissed me, then bent to kiss my neck.
Now she started the path I thought she’d skipped earlier. She kissed her way down, teasing every inch of my chest, my abs, my sides with the feather light touch of her lips. Whether she was doing it to turn me on or to work up her own nerve, the effect was the same. I struggled to stay still, my abs contracting and my back trying to arch every time her breath or lips brushed my skin.
Stay still. Stay still. Stay— oh God…
A moan escaped my lips as hers slid down my cock. I closed my eyes and held on to the slats, and I barely breathed, both because I didn’t want to move and because I just… couldn’t. Not when she squeezed just right with her lips, or fluttered her tongue all along the shaft each time she came up. Even when uncertainty crept in and made her hesitate, her mouth was fucking amazing.
She lowered her head slowly, taking my cock a little deeper. The next time, she came down a little farther, paused for a moment, then went a fraction of an inch more before she rose again.
She was challenging her gag reflex. That had to be it. That was why she didn’t want me to move. Whatever the case, she was more than welcome to use me for as long as it took to get herself comfortable, because, Jesus Christ, that woman knew how to suck cock.
My knuckles must have been completely white by then, and when she made slow, intoxicating circles with her tongue, my eyes watered. What I wouldn’t have given to have run my fingers through her hair just then, and more than once, I almost forgot myself and reached for her. No, no, I told myself through the delirium her mouth sent me into. Don’t let go. Don’t move. Don’t. Fucking. Move.
Oblivion was more and more difficult to ignore, though, and the electricity surging up my spine with every sweep of her tongue wasn’t going to let me hold still much longer.
When I spoke, my voice was little more than a breathless moan. “Oh fuck, baby, you’re gonna make me come.”
She backed off slowly, then looked up at me and grinned. “We can’t have that yet, can we?”
“Tease.” I groaned, not sure if I was frustrated that she’d let me come back to earth, or even more turned on because this wasn’t over yet.
“I’m not a tease.” She came back up to kiss me. “If I was a tease, I’d get on top of you so you were that close to my pussy, but still couldn’t fuck me.”
“And I wouldn’t put that past you at all,” I growled as she got on top. I put my hands on her sides, exhaling as she straddled me and pressed her pussy against my cock. I couldn’t wait to be her Dom, but I’d have been lying if I’d said I didn’t enjoy this. Every little bit of boldness and brazenness drew her out of her shell, loosened the past’s grip on her, and the Dom in me wasn’t going to argue.
“See?” She grinned down at me. “This is what a tease does.”
“Which is why I called you a tease.” I laughed. “This, and because I really, really liked what you were doing with your mouth.”
“Why thank you.”
I teased her nipple with my thumb and forefinger. “Now the question is, do you want me to return the favor?”
She tensed. Dropping her gaze, she swallow
ed hard. “Scott, I don’t know if—”
“If you don’t want me to, it’s okay,” I whispered. “But if you do, you know I’m perfectly willing.”
A quiet laugh relieved some of the tension in her posture. “You always have liked that, haven’t you?”
“Damn right I do.” I drew a light circle around her nipple with my fingertips. “If you want me to stop, all you have to do is say the word.”
She bit her lip, avoiding my eyes.
“Do you trust me?” I whispered.
“Yes, yes, of course,” she said. “It’s just… it’s been so long since…”
“Since someone’s gone down on you with your pleasure in mind?”
Her cheeks colored a little, and she nodded.
I drew her down to me and teased her lips apart with my tongue. When I broke the kiss, I whispered, “You know the only thing I have in mind is your pleasure, right?”
Another slow nod. She looked me in the eye, and three grooves appeared on her forehead as she said, “I don’t know if I can… if I can come that way, though.”
“You came the other night just by being fucked.”
“I know, but this… The thing is, I’ve been…” She cleared her throat. “I’ve been punished for coming this way before.”
“I know you have. And let me reassure you,” I whispered against her lips, “the only thing that’ll happen if you come tonight is I’ll be that much harder…” I dragged my lower lip across hers. “I’ll want you that much more…” I kissed her softly. “…and I’ll just have fuck you until you come again.” I didn’t give her a chance to respond before I kissed her full-on, but the shudder that rippled through her told me she’d gotten the message.
Once she’d relaxed a little, I looked into her eyes again. “Do you know how safe words work?”
“Not from personal experience, but yes, I know how they work.”
I released a breath through clenched teeth. “Have I mentioned lately that I think there’s a special place in hell for your ex?”
She laughed dryly. “You’ve mentioned it, yes.”
“Good.” I touched her face and kissed her lightly. “I use two safe words with all of my subs. Say the word ‘red,’ everything stops. Immediately, no questions asked. ‘Yellow,’ and I’ll back off with whatever I’m doing. Clear?”
She nodded.
“You okay with going on?”
Another nod. I eased her on to her back. Her body stiffened again, then relaxed against the bed. I trailed light kisses down her neck, pausing at her collarbone, then the hollow of her throat, before continuing down her chest. She ran her fingers through my hair, a hint of a tremor letting me know the apprehension wasn’t yet gone.
I closed my lips around her nipple and teased it with the same circles, flutters, and arcs I intended to use on her clit. I moved to her other nipple and did the same. She moaned, squirming beneath me, and I couldn’t decide if there was more arousal or uncertainty in her voice.
“Do you want me to stop?” I asked.
“No.” But she didn’t sound so sure.
“Tell me if you want me to keep going.”
“I want…” Her voice shook when she spoke again. “What if I can’t come?”
I dropped a light kiss between her breasts and looked up at her. “Then I’ll make you come a different way.” Another kiss, a half an inch or so lower. “I meant what I said, baby. I’m not asking you to perform.” Still another, still lower. “I’m doing this for you, not for me.”
At that, she relaxed a little more.
“Tell me your safe words.”
She took a breath. “Red to stop, yellow to slow down.”
“Good. Do you want me to keep going?”
Almost inaudibly, she said, “Yes.”
I continued, kissing my way down her belly. “I don’t know if I ever told you”—I paused to kiss her warm skin—“how much I love the way your pussy tastes.”
She shivered.
“And when you come…” I dropped a soft kiss just above her navel. “…Jesus, baby, the way you taste when you come…” Another light kiss, and her muscles quivered beneath my lips. I looked up at her. “Are you sure you want me to do this?”
The silence lingered long enough I was certain she’d had second thoughts. My blood turned cold when she finally whispered, “No.”
I raised my head.
“I’m not sure if I am.” Her cheeks colored when she looked down at me. “But I’m not ready for you to stop.”
“Then I won’t.” I dipped my head and let my lip touch her inner thigh when I spoke. “I won’t stop until you tell me to.” I kissed her inner thigh again, this time just a breath away from her pussy, and the light scent of her made my mouth water. “Do you want me to do this?”
Please say yes, baby. Please, please say yes.
“Yes,” she whispered. Then she cleared her throat and said it again, louder and with more confidence this time, “Yes.”
That first taste nearly drove me out of my mind. Oh my God, the way she tasted. Tangy, sweet, so intoxicating I forgot where I was for a few seconds. I teased her pussy lips apart with the tip of my tongue, and the way she moaned and squirmed made me as lightheaded as the way she tasted. I was rock hard, my entire body aching with the need to fuck her, but I could have done this all night.
I worked my way up to her clit, and she gasped when I circled it with my tongue. She moaned again when I slipped two fingers inside her. Curling them just slightly, I beckoned. A little more, a little more, until—
“Oh, fuck,” she whimpered, clawing at the sheets as her back arched beneath her.
There.
I made slow, gentle circles on her G-spot with my fingertips, moving them in time with my tongue on her clit. Every breath she took was sharper and shallower than the last, and I had to lay my other arm across her hips just to keep her from pulling away from me.
Her breath caught and her pussy tightened around my fingers. I could barely breathe myself, my heart pounding faster and faster as she neared the edge. A distant memory wandered through my consciousness, taking me back to those nights when I would make her come just like this, then fuck her absolutely senseless. Neither of us ever came as hard as we did like that, when her orgasm followed so closely on the heels of another, and her pussy was so, so wet, so—
“Wait.” Her voice jarred my wandering mind back into the present. “Scott, stop.”
Before the first word was off her lips, I’d stopped. Ignoring the disappointment tugging at my gut, I pushed myself on to my arms and came back up to her. “What’s wrong?”
“I—” She paused, then shook her head as she wrapped her arms around my neck. “I just can’t. I’m not ready for this yet.”
“Then I won’t push you.” I kissed her, shivering as she slipped her tongue between my lips. She’d always loved kissing me after I’d gone down on her, and at least that much hadn’t changed.
“Fuck me,” she murmured into my kiss. “Please, fuck me.”
“That, I can do.” I made quick work of getting a condom out and on, and as soon as I was on top of her again, she pulled me down into a deep, passionate kiss.
A gasp from both of us broke that kiss when I thrust into her. My eyes rolled back and a low growl emerged from the back of my throat. Just like going down on her, I could have done this all night. All damned night.
“You feel amazing,” I groaned. “Jesus Christ…”
“So do you,” she whispered, but something about the way she said it turned my blood cold.
I looked down at her. She met my eyes, but something was… off. Even as I fucked her, just as she’d asked me to do, she didn’t relax. Something in her eyes and the furrow of her brow spoke of lingering frustration.
“Do you like that?” I asked, testing the water.
She closed her eyes. “Yeah.” On just that single syllable, her voice cracked. Almost imperceptibly, but it definitely cracked.
Shit.
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I slowed my strokes and bent to kiss her. Physically, she enjoyed this, but in her mind, she’d lost. She’d tried to get past an obstacle, and though she’d made headway, it wasn’t enough for her. She was too proud, too strong, to accept that kind of defeat.
“Let me taste you again,” I whispered.
She looked at me with wide eyes. “But I…”
“I want to taste your pussy again.” I leaned down to kiss her neck. Then I whispered in her ear, “You just don’t know how much that turns me on.”
She shivered, but she was still tense.
“If you want me to stop again, I promise I will.” I raised my head again. “You know I’ll stop if you ask me to.”
She held my gaze.
I swallowed hard. Give me another chance to help you get past this.
Finally, she gave a single, slow nod.
Relief and arousal alike rushed through me. “Just say the word,” I said. “All you have to do is say stop. You remember your safe words?”
“Red to stop, yellow to back off.”
“Good.” I kissed her again and withdrew. She shivered, but didn’t protest while I trailed soft kisses down her neck and chest. I continued down, down, down, moving slowly enough to keep from unsettling her, giving her time to get used to me, to voice second thoughts if they came to her.
If they came to her, she didn’t make them known. I kissed her hipbone, then her inner thigh, glancing up at her in case there was any apprehension on her face, and there was. Worry creased her forehead. Her eyes were screwed shut, her lips pressed together in a thin, pale line.
“Do you want me to stop?” I asked.
“No,” she breathed, and the creases in her forehead diminished slightly. “No, I don’t want you to stop.”
Without another word—but with a silent prayer that I could help her over, past, through this wall—I went down on her again.
Reconstructing Meredith (Light Switch Book 2) Page 6