“Shush, baby.” Quill? Quill is here?
“Don’t blame yourself, Luisa is a strong woman. She made her choice, and I’m so thankful she did. She saved Jack,” Quill explains. I hear Jasmine cry again.
“I know you’re right, it’s just… she looks so pale. Why won’t she wake up, goddamn it?” Tears… more tears. Jasmine, I’m okay. Jasmine, Jasmine. Tired, so tired. Then darkness again.
Beep, beep, beep. Why won’t someone shut that off?
“It’s been eight days now, goddamn it. Eight days. Why hasn’t she woken up yet?” Hawke, Hawke I’m here, I’m here. Please, why won’t my words come out?
There’s another voice but I can’t hear what they’re saying, their words spoken so low.
“I don’t give a shit, doc. Do something. This can’t be good for the baby.”
Baby? He must be confused. Darkness. I’m so tired.
Beep, beep, beep. That sound, someone shut off that sound! I feel different. My senses are stronger, I can hear better, smell better. I try and move my right hand, and I’m able to slowly move my fingers a little. I feel cool material beneath them, and then repeat the same movement with my left hand this time. Something is clipped to my finger, though, and it’s annoying me. I want to rip it off but don’t have the strength. Slowly and steadily my eyes flutter open. So bright. So bright it’s blinding me. I quickly close them. Come on, you can do this. I try a second time, and this time when I open them, I keep them open. I begin to cough uncontrollably. There’s something stuck in my throat.
“Luisa? Oh my God, you’re awake. Sit tight, honey, I’m going to go and get the nurse.” I hear my mom run to the door and open it, screaming for the nurse, and then yelling, “She’s awake!”
She comes running back in with my dad, and Jasmine by her side as well. “Oh, thank God,” my mom cries, leaning in and kissing me on my forehead, tears rolling down her face. I want to hug her back, but I can’t. I can’t move. I have all these wires hanging off me.
“Excuse me ma’am, if you can just step back for me so I can check her vitals.”
My mom does as she’s asked and steps back. “Yes, of course.” Her hair, usually perfect, is tied in a messy bun, and her face is clear of any makeup, dark smudges under her eyes making her look so tired. Jasmine is standing at the end of the bed with my father, and they both have tears in their eyes. I search around for Hawke, but I don’t see him.
Just as the nurse is about to shove some torch in my face to check my eyes, he comes rushing into the room, only stopping when he reaches the side of my bed. He looks tired, so tired. He has more scruff around his face, bags under his eyes, their usual bright blue shade now dull. His shirt is creased, and his hair looks oily and messy. Hawke looks the picture of exhaustion.
“Babe, you’re awake.” His eyes crease at the edges and fill with tears. He grips my hand, his warmth traveling through me. I want to smile and tell him I love him but I can’t, and then he breaks down. He falls to his knees and rests his head on the bed, all the while kissing and cupping my hand in his. He cries. The sound of his tears breaks me in two. He’s broken. I want to run my hand over his head and tell him it’s going to be okay, but I can’t do that either. This damn thing in my throat is stopping me from talking.
“Sir!” the nurse says, and Hawke’s head snaps up to look at her. She smiles at him. “Can you please give me a minute, let me take this tube out of her mouth and check her vitals.” Hawke stands, sniffling as he does. He wipes his tears away and leans down and kisses my forehead, then looks up at the nurse and nods for her to continue on.
Once the tube is removed, I whisper, “Water.”
The nurse quickly turns and pours some water into a glass on the bedside table, placing a straw in it. “Here, honey, just small sips.”
She pushes the straw against my lips, and I open my mouth and slowly suck some in. I begin to cough, and slouch when pain shoots through my side.
Hawke is over to me in seconds, and pushes my hair off my face. His look of concern has my heart so full of love for him, and I smile. “Here,” he says taking the water out of the nurse’s hands. “I’ll do it.”
I smile warmly at him, and croak out, “Thank you.”
He replies with a smile, and places the straw in front of me again. “Here, do you want more?” I lean a little forward and sip on the straw again, enjoying the coolness that travels down my throat. It feels like it’s on fire.
“Thank you,” I repeat, and my voice comes out all scratchy.
The nurse continues to check my pupils and blood pressure, then explains that everything is looking great. Hawke straightens and folds his arms, looking as if he’s going to hit something.
“Are you okay?” I clear my throat, trying to get it to sound normal. I reach my hand out to him, and he instantly takes it.
The nurse interrupts. “I’m going to page Dr. Salvator, to let him know you’re awake. We’re so glad you woke up, honey,” Nurse Betty says. Well, that’s what her badge says anyway.
“Thank you,” I reply and watch her head out the door.
My eyes land on my mom, and she comes running over to my bed, crying. “Oh, thank God.” She hugs me and I cradle her head, letting her tears fall. “We thought we lost you. We thought….”
“It’s okay, Mom,” I whisper.
My dad joins her, and leans down and kisses me on my cheek before cupping it in his warm, familiar hand. “You’re fine now, baby girl. Your mom and I will take care of you. We’re gonna fly you back down with us to Tennessee where you belong.”
My eyes widen and I instantly snap my head over to where Hawke is standing. His jaw is clenched, I can see he’s holding back. I look back at my father and smile. “There’s no need, Dad, I’ll be fine here with Hawke.”
My dad looks over at Hawke, then back at me. “You can’t be serious about that man over there,” he states pointing his finger at Hawke. “He’s the reason you’re in this bed. Now, you’re gonna come home with us, where we can take care of you. It’s about time you left New York and came home. There’s nothing for you here.”
“But Dad,” I cry. “I love him.”
He shakes his head. “He’s a thug, sweetheart, you deserve better.” My dad narrows his eyes at Hawke.
I glance back at Hawke, surprised he’s not telling my father to shut the hell up. He just keeps his gaze focused on me. I look back to my parents. “I want to be alone, please.”
My dad nods at me and straightens. “All right, sweetie,” my mom says in agreeance. “We’ll just be outside if you need us.”
“Thanks, Mom.” I don’t miss the pissed-off look she gives my father as they walk away.
Once they’ve gone Jasmine quickly runs up and hugs me. “Ah, ow.”
“Oh shit, sorry, Lu.” Her eyes are filled with tears, her face showing how scared she was for me. Quill walks in and smiles at me when he reaches Jasmine.
“How’s… how’s the baby?” I ask, fear running through me as I look at her now flattened stomach. Then my eyes lift to hers, and all I see is happiness there.
“We had a boy,” she says excitedly, and I watch as Quill steps closer and rests his hand on her shoulder.
“A boy?” I repeat excitedly. I cover my mouth with my hand, shocked that she’s already had the baby. The memory of her telling me this news comes back to me, and I whisper, “Jack.”
“Yes, that’s right, Lu, we called him Jack.”
“After your father….”
“Yes, that’s right. You mean you heard me?”
I raise my hand to my temple, feeling a little dizzy all of a sudden.
Jasmine quickly jumps up off the bed, and Hawke moves her aside to lean over me. “Luisa, you okay? Talk to me, baby.”
“I… I just feel a little dizzy, that’s all.”
“I’m gonna go get the doctor.” Hawke moves to leave, and that’s when a doctor comes walking into my room. He’s tall, quite thin, with black hair and kind blue eyes.
My eyes widen. “Ten days?”
“That’s right. We operated on you right away. You lost a lot of blood from the gunshot, but luckily it didn’t do more damage, other than hitting an artery that is, which we were successful in fixing.”
Gunshot? I remember being shot. The memories come flooding back. A man was holding a gun to my head, when suddenly Hawke shot him… and then the man standing behind Hawke shot me, and that’s all I remember. The pain, and Hawke hovering over me before I blacked out.
“I’m… ah… feeling a little dizzy,” I admit as I touch my forehead again.
“That’s normal, Luisa. Your body has been through a lot, it will pass. What you do need is plenty of rest. Now, how is your pain on a scale from one to ten?”
I think about his question. “Seven.”
“Hmm, I’ll organise for a nurse to bring you some pain relief.”
“Thank you, doctor.”
“The pleasure is all mine, I’m just glad to see you’re awake. Now, rest up, you need to get your strength back.” I nod at him as he gets up off the bed, Hawke immediately moving into the space where Dr. Salvator was only seconds ago.
“I meant what I said, Reece, she needs rest. Don’t stay too long,” the doctor says sternly.
Hawke turns to face him and growls. ”I’m staying here, just like the other ten nights. I’m not leaving her.”
Dr. Salvator looks over to me.
“It’s okay,” I assure him.
“I’ll give you some privacy then.”
Jasmine and Quill wave goodbye as well. “We’ll leave you guys alone.”
A nurse walks in with my pain relief, and I swallow it with no hesitation. She checks the machines attached to me once more before leaving again.
Once everyone has left the room, Hawke looks down at me. “Alone at last,” he says, his smile taking my breath away. He reaches and swipes his thumb across my bottom lip. “You scared the shit out of me, Lu.” I swallow hard trying to clear the lump in my throat. I could have died, never seen his face again. Tears threaten to fall, and one does escape. Hawke immediately wipes it away with his thumb. He leans in and whispers, “I love you, don’t you ever leave me again.” He kisses my lips briefly, then pulls back. “You rest. We have a lot to talk about, but right now, you need to get some sleep.”
He starts to get up from the bed, and I shoot my hand out to his. “Please, don’t leave me, stay with me,” I beg.
His eyes soften and he cups my cheek. “I won’t ever leave you.” He makes himself comfortable on the bed beside me, and rolls on his side. He tucks his arm under my head and rests his chin there. “Sleep now, babe. I’ll be here when you wake up.” Feeling his warmth, my eyes start to flutter closed.
Hawke
Hearing the door to Luisa’s room open, I look up and see a nurse walking in. I rub my eyes with the heels of my palms, and glance at my watch. It’s 7:30 a.m., too early for this shit. The nurse approaches, and is about to speak when I quickly raise my finger to my lips to let her know to keep quiet. Luisa needs all the rest she can get. The nurse smiles, and picks up a clipboard and begins to write notes, looking at the monitor attached to Luisa. Once she’s done she pops the clipboard back on the side of the wall, and walks out the room.
Luisa is fast asleep and nestled into my side. She’s so beautiful, even while she’s sleeping, long eyelashes fanning her cheeks, her full lips slightly open as she takes her breaths. When she woke up yesterday I was so desperate to tell her about the baby, but I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t just come out and say she’s having our baby when she’d just woken up from being in a coma. Fuck, no one knows about the baby besides Quill. I told him to keep it hushed for now, till I tell Luisa, but when Jasmine’s gaze meets mine, she has this mischievous look on her face, like she knows. It wouldn’t surprise me, that even though I told Quill not to mention the baby to anyone, he has. When it comes to Jasmine, there’s no holding back for Quill.
I’m starting to get it. Looking down at Luisa’s sleeping figure, a knot forms in my gut. She could have been killed under my protection. I don’t know how, but I’m going to make it up to her. She deserves to be happy, and I want to be the guy to give her everything she deserves.
I called St. Jude’s, the rehab centre, yesterday, and they tell me Josie is doing well. She’s actually going through with it, sticking with the program. According to the doctor I spoke to she’s been joining all the classes, and has passed through the hardest part of the program. I’m glad she’s following through and getting the help she deserves, and with Santana and his men dead, they won’t be out there trying to kill her.
Luisa begins to stir, and not able to control myself any longer, I lean in and kiss her lips. Her eyes fly open and for a moment I see panic in them, but they soften when she realizes it’s me.
“Morning, baby. How are you feeling?”
“Sore,” she admits, squinting as her eyes adjust to the sunlight coming through the window.
“I know, baby.” I kiss the top of her head. “Do you want me to call the nurse?”
She stretches, and shakes her head. “No, I like being close to you. Just us.”
Her words are like music to my ears. After everything she’s been through because of me, she still wants me.
“Lu, listen. I need you to know that I never meant for you to get hurt. The….”
My words cease when she places her finger against my lips, and whispers, “It’s over. You need to stop feeling guilty, Hawke. I love you, and what I did that night was to protect my friend. What did they want, anyway? Why did they blow up the club and want to kill you?”
I sigh and run my hand down the back of my neck. I scratch my chin, then tell her the story, starting from when I got the call from Santana at Quill and Jasmine’s wedding.
All the while I’m explaining things to her, her eyes widen gradually in shock. “That’s why you went to her, isn’t it? Why you left the wedding? To help Josie.”
“That’s right, baby.” I tuck her hair behind her ear. “I just couldn’t let them kill her because of the club. As much as she’s hurt me in the past, she still meant something to me once upon a time. She didn’t deserve to die. So I had to leave. As much as it killed me to leave you there, I knew you’d be fine.” I grasp Luisa’s face between my hands to gain her full attention. “You are the one I love. You are the one that I want a future with, no one else.”
“A future?” she says frowning.
I move in closer, so my lips are now only a mere hairsbreadth away from hers. “That’s right, a future with you and….”
She pulls her head back. “And what?”
“There’s something you need to know, baby,” I begin to explain, pulling her face in closer to mine again. “But promise me you’re not going to freak out.”
“What is it? You’re scaring me, Hawke,” she says covering my hands with hers.
I feel a lump form in my throat, and when I speak I’m filled with so much emotion my voice breaks. “You’re pregnant, we’re going to have a baby.”
Luisa’s eyes widen again, filling with unshed tears. “No,” she says shaking her head. “I can’t be, I mean… we didn’t plan this. We were careful. How did…? When did…?”
“I don’t know how, baby, or when. All I do know is that you’ve got our baby growing inside of you, and I’m fucking thrilled.” My heart is beating at double speed.
Tears fall from Luisa’s eyes, and I lean in and kiss each of them, either side of her face. I cup the back of her neck and kiss her lips tenderly, softly, showing her how much I love her with each one.
“I love you so much,” she says against my lips, and those words do something to me. I run my hands through her hair and tighten my hold, pulling her head back so I can have better acce
ss to her mouth. I devour it—kissing, sucking, tangling my tongue with hers. Feeling as if I can’t get close enough to her, I reach around her back and pull her in closer to me. I’ve missed her so fucking much. Need her, want her, but I have to be gentle.
Just as I’m about to pull back, she brings her hands up to my face and holds me captive to her kiss. Her tongue delves inside my mouth, and I moan when she grabs my hand and places it on her breast. I squeeze, rubbing my thumb over her nipple, and it hardens instantly. Her hospital gown is loose around her neck, so I pull it down and squeeze her bare breast in my hand, loving how it fits perfectly. My lips make their way down her neck, my tongue leaving a wet trail, and reach her breast. Taking her pink nipple into my mouth, I groan as I lick over the peak, and begin to suck. But it’s not enough; it’s never enough when it comes to Lu.
Her moans and gasps make me harden instantly, to the point I’m gonna come in my jeans. Her hands fly to my head and she runs her fingers through my hair. I feel pressure at the back, letting me know she wants me even closer. Before I lose total control and someone walks in on us, I make my way back up her neck to her lips, hearing her sound of disapproval when I cover her breast back up.
“Why did you stop?” she says, breathless.
“Baby, I want you so fucking much, believe me. I wanna fuck you so hard you won’t know where my cock starts and ends.”
“So do it?” she says, licking her moist lips, swollen from our kisses.
“Don’t fucking tempt me, Lu. I don’t want to hurt you. And someone could walk in any minute.”
“Since when do you care if someone catches us?”
“Since it’s been over two weeks since I’ve had you, and when I fuck you the next time, I don’t want you to cover up your screams. Because, baby, I will have you screaming.” I smirk, her intake of breath letting me know she wants me just as much as I want her. “Plus, I’ll hurt you. You’re sore.”
“I can take it.” She pouts.
“I know you can, baby,” I reply, smiling and cupping her cheek. Her eyes glaze over, her mind seeming to drift somewhere, and she begins to chew on her bottom lip.
Taming Hawke: Book #3 in the Blood Brothers MC Series Page 20