He gave her a genuine smile that left her insides shaky. “You’re welcome.” She backed a step. “I’d better go unsaddle Bingo.”
“I’ll do it.” As he took the lead rope from her hand, their fingers brushed. He stared at her for a moment, then turned and led the pony away.
She stood watching him and wishing she could make sense of the emotions that had been running through her lately.
A moment ago, she had felt like a teenager in love all over again.
Last night after he had told her about being left at the altar, for another brief moment she had turned into a jealous teen satisfied at knowing he’d gotten a taste of his own medicine.
Yet a few hours later, long after that tiny burst of teenaged jealousy had faded, she lay in bed, sleepless at the thought of Cole marrying someone else.
If Ally had learned news like that from a man she cared about, she would probably have thrown something at him and then thrown him out.
That wasn’t Tina’s way.
And that was the problem.
As the night wore on, she had continued to toss and turn. And to worry.
She had felt stunned once she realized Cole would have wanted to know about Robbie. Watching them together in the sitting room had only added to her guilt. She never should have kept the truth from Cole.
No matter what he had done in the past, he had deserved to know about their child.
Chapter Nine
In her office a few days later, Tina finished checking the supply order that had arrived from their online distributor.
She heard a rapping sound and looked through the doorway. Jane stood on the other side of the registration desk.
Her cousins planned to stay for another week. Until then, she hoped she could keep their ideas for the renovation under control. Except for that worry, she admitted to an advantage to having them around.
Cole ate breakfast and lunch in the bunkhouse with the rest of the wranglers, but if he wasn’t in town with Layne, he came to dinner at the Hitching Post. Her cousins unknowingly continued to help run interference between her and Cole.
“Hey,” Jane said. “Andi just went to her room with the kids for a minute. As soon as she’s down here again, we’re ready for that tour you promised us this morning.”
“Sounds good.” She didn’t remind Jane it was Jed who had made the promise. And though she didn’t look forward to the tour, she acknowledged the afternoon could provide another advantage. If she heard her cousins’ more extravagant ideas before Jed did, she would have a better chance of squashing them.
“I’ll be in the sitting room,” Jane said.
“Great. And I’ll be back in a minute.”
She grabbed a stack of order pads and a box of pens from her desk. Then she marched down the hall.
Other than helping with the riding lessons, her trips around the hotel had been the extent of her exercise this week. Ally was working overtime doing inventory at the store, which meant they hadn’t been able to get together to walk.
Instead, she had received frantic daily phone calls. Ally was doing her best to get a date with her cute cowboy, who didn’t seem to be taking any of her hints. Tina had almost laughed. Though Ally didn’t know it, Ally had had more time alone with her cowhand than Tina had had with Cole.
On a couple of the nights Layne was working at SugarPie’s, Cole had brought Scott to the hotel for supper. And again to his credit, even with the two younger boys and a handful of adults around, he managed to spend time talking with Robbie.
Seeing them together made her heart beat faster, both from happiness and worry. Cole had the right to spend time with his son. She had admitted that to herself. Yet he had told her he was “meant to roam.” He had come back to Cowboy Creek “to give Layne a hand.” Neither comment left her reassured he wanted an ongoing relationship with Robbie.
She entered the kitchen, where Abuela and Jed sat at the table talking in low voices.
“Am I interrupting something?”
Startled, they glanced at her and then each other.
Her grandparents had begun to concern her, too. This wasn’t the first time this week she had found them in here in quiet conversation, as if they were discussing something they didn’t want anyone else to hear.
Abuela rose and went to the sink.
“Just figuring out the grocery list for next week,” Jed said, leaning back in his chair.
“Oh, really?” Tina said lightly. She put the pens and order pads in the drawer of the china cabinet. “Since when do you get involved in the menu planning?”
“Since we’re having a chuckwagon before the girls head home again.”
That made sense. The chuckwagon and campfire supper was always a joint effort. Everyone who worked on the ranch and was around that day pitched in to help.
It was also a huge hit with their guests. They roasted their own hot dogs and marshmallows over the fire, while Pete and the cowhands took care of grilling burgers and steaks. Abuela made the salads and sides, and Tina did whatever she was called upon to do. Jed, of course, acted as master of ceremonies.
What didn’t make sense at all was Abuela and Jed huddling over the kitchen table to discuss a menu that seldom varied.
He rose. “It’s about time for you to show Jane and Andi around the place, isn’t it?”
“About,” she agreed.
“I’ll just go remind them.”
“How could they have forgotten? You only suggested it at lunchtime. I see right through you, Abuelo.”
He started. “You do?”
“Of course I do.” She laughed. “You want more time with those great-grandkids of yours.”
He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and gave her a hug. “You know, I think you’re right.”
“You shouldn’t have to wait long. Jane said Andi will be on her way downstairs with the kids any minute.”
“Well, then, why don’t we both just head out to the lobby to meet them.”
With his arm still around her, he escorted her from the room.
It wasn’t till they were halfway down the hall that she realized how smoothly he’d gotten her out of the kitchen. And how odd it was that Abuela hadn’t said a single word.
* * *
HER STEPS HEAVY, Tina led her cousins through the upper floor of the hotel.
“I was right,” Jane declared. “This could be a real showplace.”
Tina swallowed a sigh. In her eyes, the Hitching Post already was a showplace, one filled with charm and beauty, complete with a long, rich history.
If not for her concern about the way her cousins wanted to change the hotel, she wouldn’t have played tour guide. Though Jane and Andi hadn’t visited often in the past few years, they had spent plenty of time here during their school holidays and most of their summer vacations.
But to her surprise, all afternoon her cousins had exclaimed over parts of the hotel they had never seen before, pointing out some of the features she thought made her home so special. The handmade furniture and intricately carved headboards in the bridal suites... The deep built-in window seats at either end of the upper halls...
“And those original claw-foot tubs in some of the bathrooms!” Andi exclaimed from behind her.
“Great character,” Jane agreed. “I’ll have to get some shots of those.”
Tina smiled, listening to their chatter and feeling proud as if she owned the property.
While still in grade school, she had begun helping the maids polish that furniture, wash those windows and clean all those tubs and more. None of the chores bothered her and she had never complained. She loved every room and hallway, every nook and cranny of the hotel.
“This must go to the attic,” Jane said.
Tina stumbled over her own feet. She had deliberately passed the attic stairs without mentioning them. When she turned back, she found Jane and Andi halfway to the floor above.
She put her hand on the railing and took a deep breath. “There�
�s not much up there,” she called.
Their footsteps clattered on the bare floorboards.
Frowning, she trudged up the stairs.
Even years ago, neither Abuela nor Jed had ever cared about making the climb to the unused highest floor of the hotel. With no guest rooms on this level, the maids never felt the need to come here, either. Except for a room designated for storage, she had always had the huge open attic all to herself for a playroom, a library, a dance hall. For whatever her needs and imagination made of it. Eventually, she had turned it into her own private sitting room and library.
As much as she had wanted her cousins’ companionship when they visited, she had never once thought about showing them her sanctuary. Now they had invited themselves in.
“Very nice,” Andi said. “The dormer windows make it cozy but still allow plenty of headroom.”
Jane eyed the rest of the area. “For the crowd Grandpa intends to attract, he’ll need to think about remodeling up here, converting all this into guest rooms.”
Tina held back a groan. If she had to give up her private space...
But it wasn’t her space.
Her spirits sank even lower as the women discussed their thoughts for renovations.
“That would mean a substantial investment,” she objected.
“As they say, you’ve got to spend money to make money,” Jane said flatly.
“And it’s not just about money.” Andi turned to Tina. “This is about helping Grandpa achieve his dreams.”
But at what price?
If Jed wanted to go along with some of these latest ideas, and no doubt he would, she would face even more trouble ahead. The Hitching Post didn’t generate enough income to pay for these kinds of upgrades. But she didn’t feel comfortable sharing that with her cousins.
Jane glanced at her watch. “I’ve got to make a quick phone call.”
“Thanks for the tour, Tina,” Andi said. “I’d better check in on Grandpa and the kids.” She smiled. “I’ll bet Cole’s downstairs with them by now, too. You’ll probably want to look in on all of them.”
“I’ll bet Cole will want to see her.”
Tina frowned, unsure how to take the comment.
“Grandpa’s experienced,” Jane continued, “but Cole sometimes has that deer-in-the-headlights look when he’s around the boys. I wouldn’t mind a shot of that expression.”
This week, Jane had spent quite a bit of time watching Cole. Tina swallowed hard. Any flicker of jealousy she might have felt disappeared under a flood of new worry. Was Jane the only one paying attention to Cole’s interactions with the kids? Or were Abuela and Jed noticing, too? She thought of those whispered conversations they had been having in the kitchen.
She had to tell them the truth before they discovered it on their own.
“Not that I blame him,” Jane went on, starting down the stairs. “I don’t know anything about kids.”
Andi followed on her heels. “I know what you mean about Cole, though. I just don’t picture him around kids, either. Of course, I’m still thinking of him when we were all teenagers. He’s grown up since then.”
“I’m surprised you noticed a difference, cuz.” Jane’s laugh echoed in the stairwell. “Back then, I always thought you had your eye on someone else.”
“And do you remember what I always used to say about thinking too much?”
Jane simply laughed again.
It came as no surprise that her cousins didn’t bother to share the inside joke with her. Years ago, they had always kept their secrets.
And who was she to take offense? She now had secrets of her own.
Despite Andi’s light tone, she was flushing. The woman even did that beautifully, her pink cheeks making her eyes look more blue.
“See you in a few minutes.” Jane continued down the stairs to the next floor.
Tina began to follow.
“Tina, wait,” Andi said. She looked down the stairwell. Jane had disappeared from view. “Don’t mind Jane,” she said in a low tone. She sighed. “It’s great having this week to catch up again, but I’m worried about her. She’s changed a lot in the past couple of years.”
“Has she?”
“Yes. And it’s funny. She’s as outspoken as ever, yet at the same time she’s gotten more introverted. More like you.”
“Me?”
Andi smiled. “You were always so quiet whenever we came to visit. You still are.”
“I guess I don’t have Jane’s outspoken side.”
“Maybe not. And that could be a good thing.” Suddenly, Andi turned solemn. “But it’s her quiet side that bothers me. I guess it’s not surprising she’s changed so much, considering what she does for a living.”
Puzzled, Tina frowned. “She’s a photographer.”
“Yes. A freelancer, which can be a tough enough job, according to some of my friends in the business. They work for themselves, mostly doing portraits and parties close to home. Jane does a lot of work in the fashion industry, especially in New York. But that’s not what I meant. She was telling me about some of the other assignments she’s had. About some of the places she’s been to and the things she’s seen. The kids...the conditions...” Her eyes filled with tears. “I don’t know how she handles it.”
“That sounds awful,” Tina murmured, stunned. She always pictured slim, fashion-savvy Jane in fabulous settings with glamorous people.
“It is awful. I can see why it makes her introverted part of the time. Why she sometimes seems so...so abrupt and unfeeling, I guess. You know she wasn’t always like that.” Andi took a deep breath. “Anyhow, what she said about Cole...I don’t think she meant anything by the way she said it. Grandpa told us Cole barely knows his nephew. I think somebody ought to give him a medal for trying to make up for lost time. And for what he’s doing for all the boys.”
Tina stiffened. “All the boys...?”
“Well, I guess I shouldn’t speak for your son, only mine. Since Grant died, Trey has been so withdrawn.” Andi’s voice shook, reminding Tina of how traumatic the past few months had been for her. “Cole’s doing a great job making him feel like he fits in.”
“Is he?” she murmured.
“Yes. You know how it goes with kids. The little ones all want to feel like ‘big’ kids. And the older ones don’t want to hang out with the younger ones.” Andi ran her hand along the stair rail, not meeting Tina’s eyes.
Was she attempting to explain what she and Jane had done? Was she saying they hadn’t excluded her for any personal reason, but simply because she was a couple of years younger?
“Teenagers feel that way, too, I suppose,” Tina said slowly.
“Teenagers, especially. Until they grow up and get over themselves. Maybe if Jane and I had visited more often in the past few years, you’d have seen sooner that we’ve grown up. Like Cole.” Though her cheeks had turned as pink as they had when Jane had teased her in the attic, she smiled tentatively.
Tina hesitated, then smiled back at her.
As she followed Andi down the stairs, her heart felt just a bit lighter...until she thought of what she needed to do now.
* * *
AFTER TUCKING ROBBIE in that night, Tina checked the kitchen and found it empty, as she had expected.
She had asked Abuela and Jed to meet her in his den.
They were both waiting for her when she arrived, but she had to pause to take a deep breath before she could step into the room.
Jed rested back in the swivel chair with his fingers laced crossed his middle and his crossed feet propped up on the edge of the desk. Abuela sat on the couch with the almost-finished afghan she was crocheting spread across her lap.
She adjusted the guest chair to face them both.
While she was growing up, the three of them had often gathered here for discussions, taking the same comfortable seats. Tonight, she didn’t feel at all comfortable.
“Did you get Robbie set for the night?” Jed asked.
; “After a while. He wanted to talk about his ponies more than he wanted to focus on sleep.” Even to her ears, her laugh sounded forced. She gripped the arms of the chair.
Jed’s head tilted thoughtfully, and he eyed her.
Abuela set down the afghan but still held the crochet hook. She was waiting, possibly trying to think of a reason to leave if the conversation drifted where she never liked it to go.
Tina wished this conversation didn’t have to happen at all. Suddenly, she was trembling from head to foot. She took a deep breath and clutched the arms of the chair more tightly. “Even though I told you I wanted to talk with you both, I’m not sure how to start.”
“That’s easy enough,” Jed said. “You know I like to hear everything flat-out straight.”
“Yes, I do know. But it’s something I’ve never talked about before. Something I never told you. About me. About Robbie.”
Jed and Abuela exchanged a quick glance. Her short, rapid sentences sounded nothing like her, and they realized it.
She took another deep breath, struggling to find the way to explain something so complicated, so emotional. The analytical part of her mind said Jed had already given her the answer.
“All right,” she said. “Flat-out straight. When I had Robbie, I never told you who his father was. That was partly because I never planned to let the boy know he’d gotten me pregnant. But now he’s found out, and I want you to know who he is.” She took another deep breath. “Cole.”
Abuela gave a low moan.
“Don’t,” Tina said. By the time she had moved to the couch, tears were trickling down Abuela’s cheeks. “Please, don’t cry, Abuela.”
“Mi vida.” My life.
The familiar endearment and her grandmother’s distress made Tina’s eyes fill, too.
“Now, this won’t get us anywhere,” Jed protested. She could hear tears beneath his gruff tone. He grabbed a couple of tissues from the box on the coffee table and gave them each one. “You girls take these and pull yourselves together. I’ll go start a pot of tea.”
Despite the situation, Tina almost smiled. Abuela didn’t like conversations about the past, and Jed couldn’t handle tears.
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