by Beth Garrod
I took the money off the counter and, cringing so hard I swear Gary’s furry face was blushing too, I turned to get their change. But as I handed it back it was Adam who put his hand out.
“Thanks, I cannot wait to see my dog’s little face when she tries this.”
“And I cannot wait to see your little face, when you see your dog’s little face,” is what I wanted to say. But instead I just passed him the bag.
The two of them turned to walk out, but Adam spotted the toilet sign and stopped.
“Sorry – would it be OK if I washed my hands, they’re a bit…” He held them out. “Covered in your fluff” was the end of the sentence he was too polite to say.
I nodded and gestured towards the loo.
When he was out of earshot, Marcus politely filled the awkward silence.
“He’s made up about finding this place. His dog’s getting on, and he’s been extra sentimental about her.” It was weird Marcus talking to me like he thought I was a forty-year-old man. Still, probably better than him knowing the truth. “We’ve just been watching this, I dunno, dog display team or something, that practise near our football pitch. Ad always makes us stop and watch. He loves them. Anyway, it was them that told us about this place.”
Well, that was nice of them. Must ask Mum if she knows them. But before I could figure out how to reply without words, Adam came back out. And he was clutching a bunch of paper.
PLEASE NO.
“Someone must have left these in there,” he looked impressed. “It looks like the entire plot of Game of Thrones?!” Thank you, Lord of Pens, Queen Penelope, for not letting him recognize my handwriting?! “Whatever floats your boat, right?”
Little did either of them know that it was Adam who floated my boat. But all I could do was delicately nod my big dog head back. Marcus shook his non-dog one as if he couldn’t believe what he’d seen and walked towards the door.
I lifted Gary’s ear flap as discreetly as I could so I could catch every last chat morsel before they disappeared from my life for good.
“That was some seriously freaky fan stuff, dude.” Marcus elbowed Adam. “Sure they weren’t yours now you don’t have that girl to talk to about it any more?”
Sorry, what?!
Was I that girl?! Was I sliding all up into their real-life chat like I had some significance?!
If only I could see Adam’s face, not the back of his head. Reactions were a lot harder to tell from follicles.
Adam’s head shook as he laughed. “Remind me why we’re mates again?”
Noooooo. He’d moved the convo on. Hope of insight over. And in three steps’ time they’d disappear forever.
“Cos who else was going to go to that weird festival with you? Although granted, whenever I’m with Molly, I do get waaaay more girls coming over.”
OH GREAT. Could the world (or at least Marcus) just shut up about Molly already?!
But Adam swung his bag into the back of Marcus’s knee.
“Oi, my dog is not your wingman.”
OR NOT.
What the actual what?!
Molly, offa being my number-one most-envied human, was Adam’s dog?!
And I’d been all jealous and frosty and, “No, I won’t go on a date with you”, because I thought she was his girlfriend!?
Bella Fisher, you are the World’s Biggest Idiot! Why didn’t you listen when he talked about her rather than just gormlessly stare at his beauty?!
But then again, why didn’t Adam have an Instagram account for his dog like a normal person?!
But then again, again, why didn’t you just say yes to Hillfest and find out live?!
Thank goodness Marcus and Adam had both cleared the shop because I had to temporarily de-Gary-head to get enough oxygen into my brain which was whirling so fast it felt like a fidget spinner.
The last five mins had had more revelations that a week of Jeremy Kyle.
I did a little doggie happy dance. Like doggie paddle but with no water. Adam wasn’t going out with Molly. Other than in a “walking” sense.
And there might still be a glimmer of hope for us all?
And he’d just patted me?!
It was all too much.
I knew what I had to do. After I’d said no to Hillfest, I HAD to finish what I’d tried to start. Ask Adam out one more time. To find out if he liked me as a friend – or something more. And this time I had to make it unique. Something me. Something he couldn’t say no to.
But what?
I spent the rest of the afternoon serving what few customers we had, trying to think up ideas, until Mum arrived to pick me up for the dentist.
I couldn’t run the risk of leaving the shop as me, so had to fold myself into her passenger seat as Gary.
She pushed my tail out of the way of her gearstick.
“Soooo, how was your doggie debut?”
What one word could sum it up?
“Eventful.”
“And did we have many customers?” Her hopeful tone so desperately wanted the answer to be yes. I couldn’t bear to disappoint her.
“Loads. Your free ice cream was a big hit.”
True – I’d given away a hundred human ice creams. But I’d only sold ten dog ones. Mum beeped the horn with glee. OH GOSH. She’d changed it back to a cow sound. A confused old man stared at us as we mooed past. We must look quite something. A bellowing car with a dog shaking its head in the passenger seat.
“And sales?”
“Not loads,” her face dropped, “… but lots of people said they’d be back, so I’m sure they’ll pick up soon.” I didn’t want to tell her I’d only managed to add five new followers to the Instagram account as well.
Mum chewed on her bottom lip as she always did when she was genuinely worried about something. And for someone who giggled when a birthday-cake candle set fire to her hair, I knew this meant GADAC’s slow start was really getting to her.
I put my paw on her hand.
“We’ll get there, Mum. I promise.”
As soon as I said it, I regretted it. I didn’t like breaking promises – I just had no idea what I could do to help. But wait. There was something positive.
“Oh – meant to ask. Do you know an, erm, dog-display team?” It did the trick – her smile returned as she told me all about them. Apparently they were a “dog agility” team called the Furry Flyers and they’d been at the launch. And, as we sat in the waiting room, my appointment getting nearer, Mum turned the tables and tried to cheer me up by showing me clips of them in action.
Who knew dogs could look so happy bursting balloons?
Who knew there was a Jack Russell who had a genuine enthusiasm for zip wires?
And who knew that starting this conversation was going to turn out to be one of the biggest mistakes of my life?
CHAPTER
SIXTEEN
Whatever was in that sedative drink at the dentist they should put in drinking taps at school. I would never have to suffer a geography lesson again. Because when I finally woke up on Sunday I had three repaired teeth and zero recollection of it happening. RESULT.
So what with not having to face life semi-toothless, and the most amazing Adam development, I was on Cloud 9 for tonight’s semi-final. Maybe even Cloud 10 because Tegan could make it, so we could finally tackle it as a three.
Yup, for the first time ever, I had a tiny bit of confidence we might get through.
What a time to be alive!
I was so happy that even when I discovered an absolute shocker about one of the other contestants, it didn’t phase me.
When the other two arrived I couldn’t wait to tell them exactly what I’d found.
Letty, Queen of Evil, had struck again.
Rach tore open a bag of the Tangfastics she’d brought, put three in her mouth to channel her nervous energy and I explained.
“OK. So I was doing some last minute forum trawling. And surprise surprise, Letty had responded to one of Lis’s comments.” Rach grimaced.
”But it wasn’t just a suck up,” I paused – I almost couldn’t wait to see their faces when they found out. “… it was an attempt to get me kicked out.”
Rach gasped so hard I think she swallowed all three sweets. Tegan just looked pure furious. I brought the page up on my laptop.
HI GUYS. LIS – LOVING THOSE PICS OF YOU AT THAT CHARITY GIG LAST WEEK. YOUR OUTFIT WAS TOTAL FIRE!!
Tegan shook her head, “Could she BE more obvious?!”
I’M REAAAAALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO THE SEMI-FINAL. BUT, I WAS CHATTING TO MY DAD* AND WE GOT TALKING ABOUT BELLA.
*HE’S A LAWYER
Rach was pink with rage. “Erm, excuse me. Why is she so obsessed with you?!”
I shrugged. “Exactly what I’d been wondering too.”
OBVS I’VE TOTALLY LOOOOVED HER ANSWERS,
Tegan laughed. “Bet she has?!”
BUT IS IT FAIR THAT LAST ROUND YOU SAID ONE SENTENCE AND SHE BLATES USED TWO?
Tegan’s laugh switched into a splutter. “Sorry, what?! Is she really going full grammar police in desperation?”
Rach stabbed at my screen, like she was somehow poking directly into Queevil. “Is it fair you’ve been BRIBING STRANGERS to vote for you, you Queevilest douchebag?!”
I scrolled down. “There’s more…”
SOOOO IF YOU’RE CHOOSING THE TOP THREE ON SUNDAY, SHOULD SHE REALLY BE ALLOWED TO BE IN IT?
JUST FOOD FOR THOUGHT!
LOVE YOU GUYS!
LETTY XOXOXOXOXO
I nodded along as the other two reread it ten times, just like I had earlier. It was satisfying that they were reacting just like me.
“Yup, not content with stabbing us in the ears with her terrible advice, she’s stabbed me right in the back too. Well, sort of face actually.”
“The only thing I can think of is that she considers you her main competition. And that’s kind of great.” Hell yes, Tegan. “And whatever happens … we will beat her.”
I leaned over to high five her.
“In your face, Queevil.” And I meant it. I had tried to figure out why she’d taken this swipe at me, but much like understanding why Mum kept a cheese grater in the bathroom, I’d come to the conclusion, ignorance was bliss. Instead I was going to put all my energy into beating her.
Although, who knew if I could? I lowered my voice as if whispering meant long-term memories couldn’t hear me. “Guys, pleeease forget that I ever said this – but if, IF I don’t get through, will one of you hide me in your wardrobe and bring me snacks till I’m twenty-three and everyone’s forgotten?”
Rach nodded. “I’ve already cleared a space just in case.”
OK, not as positive as Tegan, but good to know I had options.
Radio Shire was keeping us hanging, and every minute that passed meant one more gazillion incoming good-luck messages from school randoms. Although “Good luck” definitely felt like shorthand for “Don’t mess this up, or I will hate you”.
But I was weirdly calm. Cos with my friends beside me, a positive Adam plan to make and, thanks to Rach, two more bags of Haribo (Starmix AND Super Mix), I felt OK. I didn’t even panic-hide anything when there was a knock at my door. Rach on the other hand was so on edge she rolled off my bed and on to the floor.
“Hope I’m not disturbing.” It was Shay, and she was holding what looked like chocolates. Double yes. Rach scrambled to her feet and smoothed her hair down. I could only make a generic “ymmm-hmm” noise as was mid-chew of two fizzy cherries.
“Bells meant, ‘Course not, come in.’ Right?” I nodded at Tegan. Our friendship transcended consonants.
“One more coming through!” Mum was in Shay’s slipstream, three bowls balanced under her chin.
“Anyone fancy some ice-cream-cone flavoured ice cream I’ve been working on?” Mum passed them out. “Let me know what you think.” She dropped her voice, thinking out loud. “It IS for humans this time… We really need something to help sales pick up at the shop…”
Shay stuck her plate out.
“Or you could try one of these? Somewhat healthier.”
I peered at what looked like a plate of lumps of soil. “No sugar, no gluten, raw cacao balls.” Tegan took one out of politeness. Rach took one out of deep love. I took one cos it was edible. But it was Mum’s ice cream that was the clear winner. She looked delighted, but Shay looked annoyed.
“Fine, hint taken. I’ll be downstairs if you need anything.” She gave me a reassuring look. “And don’t stress! You’ll be totally fine.” She paused. And winked. “I did mention Lis is really looking forward to tonight, right?”
CHATBOMB DETONATED.
Rach fell back off the bed. I was on the other side, so couldn’t see her and shouted a concerned, “Are you OK?” A shaky mouse-voice wafted back.
“Diii-iid you t-ell her a-bout ussss??!”
Was she about to cry?! Shay batted her eyelashes in an innocent “What, me?” way. I thought I better clarify.
“Rach – in case you couldn’t see that, Shay just batted her eyelashes in an innocent ‘What, me?’ way.”
Rach made the sound a jelly should make when it melts.
But when she sat up, her face had changed. Like she’d seen a ghost.
“Erm, do I recognize those shoes?”
Shay lifted up one of her feet. Or more importantly, one of the brand new coral shoes attached to it. The ones from Rach’s pic?!
“Oh, these?” She twirled it around. “Yeah. It was weird, I saw them in the shop and they seemed so much nicer. I meant to say” – Shay opened my door – “thanks for the recco – we’re the same size, right? You can borrow them anytime…”
Rach’s face was a mix of surprise, confusion and shoe-lust. She was like a living meme for “that time when you see the thing you wanted to buy on someone else and are kind of annoyed they have it and think they might have actually got the exact last pair you reserved, but are also impressed cos they look so great which proves you clearly did have excellent taste after all – in fact you have THE SAME TASTE, which is even better news – and now you’ve got the chance to borrow them, so feel conflicted.”
It was quite a specific meme.
If it was me I think I’d be pretty annoyed, but Rach seemed happy to have yet another Shay thing in common.
But Modger had already left, and Mum followed soon after. And soon, full of ice cream, the three of us were alone listening into Jaz. But there was still no question. Tegan was seriously unimpressed, so I tried to lighten the mood.
“Teeg – did I tell you that you’re basically a lifesaver? Cos after seeing Adam, the only thing that stopped me full-on fainting was that care package you brought.”
She smiled. “No biggie. Seeing you in that dog outfit was 100% worth it.”
“That’s a thought?!” Rach looked like she’d had a great idea. “If tonight doesn’t go well, you can always wear Gary full-time?”
It was worrying how pleased she looked with herself.
Tegan lay back on my bed. “Maybe drop the waistcoast in summer though?” I laughed. “I wish I could have stuck around longer, not dashed off to training… But next time, right?”
I nodded but I’d been hearing “next time” a lot recently.
EURGH. Brain, stop it. It doesn’t feel good when you’re negging on our best mate. I tried to de-guilt myself with something more positive.
“And hopefully this time next week you’ll have your place too, so we can figure out how we’re going to celebrate?”
Tegan’s face scrunched. “Imma not so sure.”
“Well we are, right, Rach?” With a slightly alarming screech Rach leapt like a flying squirrel on to Tegan and gave her a massive cuddle. “Damn straight!” But something Tegan had said was stuck on a loop. If she was dashing to training, why didn’t she have her stuff with her? Where was she going with that guy? And why hadn’t she mentioned him at all?
EURGH. What was up with me? There was probably a totally obvious explanation.
&nb
sp; “Sorry I had to duck out to deal with that customer. Did you get to do much in town after?”
OMG. Was I really fishing for details?
Teeg shrugged. “Nah, just the usual.”
Serves me right – if there was an explanation, I wasn’t getting it. But Rach had no idea I was digging for info (thankfully), and was still fully focused on Radio Shire.
“How long do you think Jaz is going to be? Do you reckon it’s too late to post a question?” She absently twizzled her hair, sticking the end in her own ear. “Cos what do you think the rules would be on me emailing in about this English essay?”
She’d restarted it five times already, and it was due in a week.
Tegan rubbed her arm. “Rach, you’ve GOT this.”
She winced. “All I’ve got is being put down a set. It sucks.” She huffed. “I suck.”
OK, something about tonight had thrown the world off balance. It was like me being so positive had somehow stolen all the good vibes the other two normally had. And I wasn’t going to stand for it. “Oi. The only thing that sucks is Mr Tucker making you stress like this.”
Tegan wiggled her feet, clicking her ankles. “And Shay buying your shoes after persuading you not to.”
Rach tilted her head. “People can change their minds! And at least I can borrow them now. For free-sies.”
Tegan shrugged and rolled back over to type on her phone. She’d been distracted by it all evening. Not that I had any idea who she was messaging.
But it didn’t matter – because, for once, I DID have an idea.
“Look. Mr Tucker wants opinion. And passion. And knowledge … right?”
Rach nodded.
“Soooo, why don’t you forget all those books he hinted at and do one you could write about for days?”
“Such as…?”
“Do I have to spell it out?!” Her blank expression meant yes. But Tegan jumped back in.
“OK, I only listened to the last two seconds of that and even I know.” She threw a pillow at Rach. “Clue: It starts with H and ends with Otter.”
Rach’s mouth dropped open.
“What?! You think I could write about Queen Joanne of the Rowling?”