by Lily Brett
Ruth stared at Zofia in disbelief. She was sure Zofia was making this up.
Making it up in an effort to align herself with Ruth. “My sister had twins,”
Zofia said.
“Identical twins?” said Ruth.
“Yes,” said Zofia.
“Lucky woman,” Ruth said.
“My sister did feel very lucky to have her twins,” Zofia said.
So Zofia was telling the truth, Ruth thought. Or was she? She could be making up the whole sister story. She might not have a sister, let alone a sister with identical twins. Ruth knew there was something very unpleasant about her own suspicions, but she couldn’t discard them. She had to get out of Poland, she thought. Poland was turning her into someone else.
Someone she didn’t like much. Maybe being in Poland was revelatory.
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L I L Y B R E T T
Maybe she was seeing aspects of herself she should know about. She didn’t like that thought, either.
“Identical twins are not hereditary,” Ruth said to Zofia.
“I know that,” Zofia said. “Otherwise I would have tried.” Ruth wondered why Zofia had wanted twins. She thought her own desire for multiple units of the same person was a desire to replicate those who had been lost. She corrected herself. The word “lost” was too amorphous. Those who had been killed. She had wanted twins or triplets to make duplicates.
Duplicates of people with similar traits and faces. It was lucky that it hadn’t been possible. Lucky that technology could induce only fraternal twins.
She thought she would have gone to any lengths to have identical children.
It was such an intense longing. She really was lucky it wasn’t possible, she thought. She couldn’t imagine herself as the mother of twins or triplets or quadruplets.
She had to veer this conversation back to more subdued ground, she thought. To animals. Animals were always a safe subject. “Do you know,”
she said to Zofia, “that in Australia they have invented a protein injection for sheep that makes the wool come off by itself?”
Zofia laughed. “I don’t believe this,” she said.
“It’s true,” Ruth said. “It was developed by government scientists.”
“What happens?” Zofia said.
“They inject the sheep with this protein,” Ruth said, “and a week later the fleece falls off.”
“Exactly a week,” Zofia said. “This is very well planned.”
Ruth laughed. She hadn’t thought about the precise timing. The precision of the procedure made her laugh. “It would not be good,” Zofia said,
“if the wool fell off at the wrong moment.” Images of sheep losing their fleece while shopping or strolling in the street or having their hair done came into Ruth’s head. She fell about laughing. Tears ran down Ruth’s face at the thought of groups of sheep losing their fleece at inopportune moments. Zofia was laughing hard, too.
The two women were still laughing when Edek arrived. Ruth saw her father. She sat up in mid-laugh. Edek was beaming. “I was just telling Zofia about a new invention by the Australian government,” she said to Edek, and told Edek about the self-shearing sheep.
T O O M A N Y M E N
[ 4 4 3 ]
“I did not know anything about this,” Edek said to Ruth. “My daughter does know everything,” he said to Zofia.
“Maybe not everything,” Zofia said, with a broad smile. She stood up and kissed Edek on the cheek. “I will see you later,” she said.
“I am very glad you did get on well with Zofia,” Edek said to Ruth as they were walking in the Market Square.
“I was being polite,” Ruth said. “Because she’s your friend.” She waited for Edek to deny that he was Zofia’s friend. She had expected him to brush off the suggestion that theirs was a real friendship. Edek said nothing. Ruth began to feel nervous that her father had made plans she was unaware of.
“We are going tomorrow, aren’t we?” she said.
“Of course,” Edek said. Ruth felt her tension dissipate. “Maybe we will go even a little earlier than what we did plan,” Edek said.
“Okay,” she said. “But why?”
“I will explain to you while we have a cup of coffee,” Edek said.
Ruth felt relieved. They were definitely leaving. Possibly leaving for Warsaw even earlier than they had planned. An earlier departure for Edek was definitely not on Zofia’s itinerary. Maybe Edek was trying to get away from Zofia. Ruth could feel herself relaxing. She would be home very soon.
She would be going home to New York. Home to her apartment. To her office. To her routines. Life would be back to normal, very soon.
“This café does look good,” Edek said, pointing to a café with a large display of pontshkes in the window. They went inside.
“I’m glad to be in a café,” Ruth said. “If I see one more of those anti-Semitic carved wooden caricatures of Jews, I’ll scream.”
“Do you want a pontshke, Ruthie?” Edek said.
“No thanks,” she said. “You have one.”
“I will have just one,” he said.
“Excuse me,” a man sitting at the next table said to Ruth and Edek. “I heard you saying that the Polish people are anti-Semitic,” he said. “Please forgive me but I had to say something.” Ruth looked at the man. He was in his mid-thirties, with an intelligent, well-defined face. “There is a reason why Polish people are hostile to Jews,” he said. Ruth turned around to face him.
[ 4 4 4 ]
L I L Y B R E T T
“Yes?” she said.
“Ruthie darling, please,” Edek said.
“Polish people did suffer greatly at the hands of the Jews after the war,”
the man said. Ruth could feel her blood pressure rising. She knew that the elevation of one’s blood pressure was supposed to be indiscernible, but she knew that hers was rising. She could feel it.
“Really?” she said to the man.
“Ruthie,” Edek said. She ignored him.
“Yes?” she said to the man again.
“Yes,” he said. “Before and during the war, the Jews, who were Communists, ran off to Russia to save their necks when the Nazis arrived.”
“You think all the Jews escaped to Russia when the Nazis arrived?”
Ruth said.
“Not all of them, but quite a few,” the man said. “After the war they all came back and occupied top positions in the Communist government, and persecuted the Polish people.”
Ruth was speechless. This man looked so presentable, so reasonable, so intelligent. His English was immaculate. He was clearly educated. How could he have gotten things so wrong? And what hope was there for other less educated Poles?
“They all came back after the war?” she said. “No one came back. Two and a half Jews came back. The only Jews in Poland are the imaginary Jews, and the carved wooden Jews. Do you understand me?” she shouted. “No one came back. Maybe a few lucky Jews did manage to get away from the Nazis, and survive, in the Soviet Union. And maybe they were Communists. But you can’t translate that into Communist Jews persecuting the Polish people.”
“Ruthie, Ruthie, please column down,” Edek said.
The man looked at Ruth. “I did not expect you to agree with me,” he said. “But I did not expect you to be rude.”
“Rude?” Ruth shouted. “You people are the rudest people on earth.
Vulgar, coarse, bigoted, obscene assholes.” Ruth looked at him. “If you stay here any longer, I’ll slug you,” she said. She was in a sweat. How could this man say what he had just said? The country was full of ignorant imbeciles and every one of them was hooked up to an intravenous anti-Semitic drip.
The man stood up and began to walk out. “I wish you every misfortune in the world,” Ruth shouted out after him.
T O O M A N Y M E N
[ 4 4 5 ]
“Ruthie darling, you got to take it more easy,” Edek said.
“He’s an asshole,”
Ruth said.
“I know,” Edek said. “But you cannot take it all so hard. It is not good for you.”
“I’m all right,” Ruth said. “Maybe I will have a pontshke.”
“Good,” said Edek. “I will go and get us a couple of pontshkes. Do you want also a hot chocolate?”
“No, thanks,” Ruth said. “I’ll have chamomile tea.”
“With lemon?” Edek said.
“With lemon,” she said.
She took off her jacket. She was still hot. Edek was right, she had to calm down. She took a couple of deep breaths. She was pleased she had shouted at the man. It felt good to say what she wanted to say. Or rather to shout it. In New York, she never shouted at anyone. In New York there was little cause to shout. The city wasn’t populated by Poles.
She couldn’t wait to be out of Poland. She decided she would call Max and ask Max to put some fresh fruit in her apartment. It would be nice to come home to some fresh strawberries and mangoes and kiwi fruit. You could get the best fruit in the world in New York. She made a vow to herself. She would never criticize New York again.
Edek came back with four pontshkes. “Four?” Ruth said.
“You need to eat,” Edek said. Ruth laughed.
“I’ll have one,” she said. She wanted to mention Zofia. To see Edek’s reaction. She really wanted to ask him how he felt about Zofia, but she didn’t want to imbue the issue of Zofia with any more importance than it already had. If, in fact, it was important at all. She wished she knew what Edek felt about Zofia. It couldn’t be much. He seemed to be leaving Kraków without any evident regret.
She decided to bring up Zofia’s name. “Zofia doesn’t like dogs,” she said. Edek looked puzzled. Ruth thought she should have introduced the subject of Zofia more languorously. This fact about Zofia and dogs obviously seemed out of context to Edek. As out of context as it was, she thought.
“I was just thinking about it because I saw a dog go by,” she lied.
“Where?” said Edek.
“It’s gone,” she said. Why was she behaving in this adolescent, juvenile
[ 4 4 6 ]
L I L Y B R E T T
manner? Why didn’t she just ask her father how he felt about Zofia? “She doesn’t like cats either,” Ruth said. Edek looked at her again.
“You do not like dogs, too,” he said. “It looks like there are many people what do not like dogs or cats.”
Well, she hadn’t got very far with that opening gambit, Ruth thought.
She had learned nothing at all. She cut her pontshke into quarters. Edek had already finished his first pontshke. He took a bite out of a second pontshke. “Ruthie darling,” he said. “I want to tell you something and I want you to promise not to be angry with me.” Oh no, Ruth thought. She stiffened. Here was the news that she didn’t want to hear about Zofia.
What was Edek going to tell her? That he was madly in love with Zofia?
That he wanted to run off with her and live in Sopot? That he was going to live in Poland, surrounded by Poles? She prepared herself to respond to the news with moderation, reasonableness, and understanding.
“Okay,” Ruth said. “What is it? I hope it’s not something terrible.”
“What could be terrible next to what we been seeing and thinking about in Poland?” Edek said. Ruth wondered if Edek was bringing in the anti-Semitism and the absence of Jews and the horror of the past in order to make the news of Zofia seem less disastrous. No, she decided. That was unfair of her. Edek was not that manipulative.
“I want to tell you,” Edek said, “that I did see Garth just before I came to Poland.” Ruth felt a flood of relief. The news was not about Zofia.
“That’s fine,” she said to Edek. “You can see him as often as you want to. It’s no big deal to me.”
“I saw him in Sydney,” Edek said.
“When were you in Sydney?” said Ruth.
“I was there on my way to Bangkok,” said Edek.
“But that was only a two-hour stopover,” Ruth said.
“Yes,” said Edek. “It was such a big rush. I never did anything like this in my life before.”
“What did you do?” said Ruth. She couldn’t see what Edek was worried she would be angry about. She had often told him she had no objection to his seeing Garth. It was extreme though, she thought, of Edek to try and fit in a visit to Garth while he was in transit on his way to Poland. But she wasn’t annoyed.
“I did catch a taxi and go to Garth’s place,” Edek said. “I do not have to T O O M A N Y M E N
[ 4 4 7 ]
tell you how this did make me nervous. I was frightened I would miss the plane and you would be annoyed.”
“If you had missed the plane I would have been worried, not annoyed,”
Ruth said. “Anyway, you didn’t, so it’s all okay.”
“I was frightened,” said Edek. “I never been to Sydney before. I did not know how far was Garth’s place from the airport. I did just get a taxi and I did give the driver the address.” Edek shook his head, still surprised at his own boldness. “I did ask the driver to go very fast,” Edek said.
“I can’t believe this,” Ruth said. “You were speeding through Sydney, endangering your life to see Garth?”
“It was lucky he was home,” Edek said. “I did ask the driver what did drive me to wait for me in case there was no one home. If there was no one home he could take me straight back to the airport. As it was, Garth did take me back to the airport.”
“Why did you do all of that rushing around when you were about to begin a long plane flight?” Ruth said.
“I did want to ask Garth something,” Edek said.
“Couldn’t you have just called him?” Ruth said.
“No,” said Edek. “This I did have to ask him in person.” Ruth felt apprehensive.
“What did you want to ask him?” she said.
“You promise me you will be column,” Edek said.
“I’ll try,” she said.
“I did ask Garth to meet me in New York,” Edek said. He looked at Ruth as though he was expecting an explosion.
“What?” said Ruth. “How could Garth meet you in New York? You’re not going to New York.”
“Maybe I am,” Edek said.
Ruth’s head started to spin. Was everything in her life not what it seemed? Not what she thought it was? Why was so much up-ended?
Unraveled and unfastened? “What’s happening?” Ruth said to Edek.
“What do you mean you may be going to New York?” She looked at Edek.
“Tell me, clearly, what’s going on,” she said. “I can’t take too many more unexpected and unexplained things. This trip has been difficult enough as it is for me.”
“This trip is difficult for you?” Edek said. “This trip was your big idea.
[ 4 4 8 ]
L I L Y B R E T T
You was the one who did want so very much to come to Poland. Do you think I did want so very much to be in Poland? No.”
“Okay,” she said. “Let’s not argue about that. Tell me the rest of the something you don’t want me to be angry about.” She tried to calm down.
In the context of other possible occurrences, seeing Garth wouldn’t be all that terrible. She would keep herself in check. She would be friendly and cheerful. She would make sure the subject of their past together was kept at bay. It wouldn’t be too bad. Nothing seemed too bad as long as it was out of Poland.
“I can invite Garth to New York if I do want to,” Edek said.
“Of course you can,” Ruth said. “But as he was part of my life, it would have been a good idea to discuss it with me first.”
“You would say you did not want to see him,” Edek said.
“Well, I would be saying it for a reason,” Ruth said.
“This reason is not a reason I can understand,” Edek said. He looked at Ruth. “Garth is like a son-in-law to me,” he said.
“Great,” Ruth said. “You’ve married him to
me despite any participation on my part.”
“He can be a son-in-law to me even if he is not married to my daughter,” Edek said. “He is like a son to me.”
There was a silence between them. Ruth looked up, and to her horror saw that Edek was on the verge of tears. She felt terrible.
“I understand, Dad,” she said. “I understand how you feel about Garth.” Edek started to cry.
“He is like a son to me,” he said. “Garth is the only company what I feel very happy with since Mum did die. Except for you, Ruthie. With other people I do feel okay, but with Garth I feel comfortable. He does know me and I do know him.”
“Don’t cry, Dad,” she said. “I’m sorry I sounded upset. I do understand.” She did understand, she thought. Garth loved Edek. Garth lit up with love when he was with Edek and Edek was all right, in Garth’s company. She was glad Edek had Garth. She realized she had been holding her breath. She breathed out. Well, at least Zofia seemed to be out of the picture, she thought.
“I’m not angry,” Ruth said to Edek. “You can see Garth. But in New York? You’re not going to New York.”
T O O M A N Y M E N
[ 4 4 9 ]
“I am going to New York,” Edek said.
“When?” said Ruth.
“With you,” said Edek.
“With me?” Ruth said. “What do you mean?”
“That is what I was doing in the airport in Warsaw,” Edek said.
“What?” she said. She was finding it hard to follow what her father was saying.
“In the airport, in Warsaw, I did change my ticket,” Edek said. He looked at Ruth expectantly and nervously. She still didn’t understand what he was saying. “I did change my ticket to go via New York from Warsaw,”
he said. “Now my ticket is from Warsaw to New York, then from New York to Sydney and then Melbourne.” Ruth was speechless. “I will stay with you a few days in New York,” Edek said.
“When did you change your ticket?” Ruth said.
“You did see me,” Edek said. “At the airport.”
“When you were getting upgraded?” Ruth said.
“I did not get such an upgrade,” Edek said. “There was nothing wrong with my seat. I did tell you this about the rest for the feet so you would understand why I had to go to get something fixed up.”