by Bonnie Leon
As if they had something of great consequence to discuss with her, the ladies gathered around Willa. Some appeared regretful, others eager.
Rebecca glanced at Cambria. She’d never avoided Rebecca. “She knows what this is all about,” Rebecca said and pushed to her feet.
“G’day,” Cambria said, offering a weak smile.
“It doesn’t feel like a good day.” Rebecca rested a hand on the side of the wagon. “It’s not lovely at all. There’s something wrong. Everyone is acting strangely toward me . . . even you. What have I done?”
“I’m not upset with ya.”
“And ya’ve done nothin’ wrong,” Elle Taylor said, joining the two. She threw an arm over Rebecca’s shoulders and gave her a hearty squeeze. “I’d say those old hens are bored and looking for trouble is all.”
“What does it have to do with me? Everyone seems angry with me, and they’ve been avoiding me.”
Elle shook her head. “There’s no need ta speak of it. It’s only gossip.”
“That’s roight, eh?” Cambria said. “I know ya wouldn’t do such a thing.”
“Do what? What is it I’m supposed to have done?”
Cambria and Elle looked at each other. With a sigh Elle said, “Well, the truth of it is, there’s talk . . . about ya and that Jim Keller fella.”
“What kind of talk?” Rebecca asked, understanding dawning.
“Wal, that the two of ya . . .” Elle set her jaw and looked directly at Rebecca. “That the two of ya are keeping company.”
“That’s preposterous!” Rebecca glanced at the clusters of people chatting over their afternoon meals. “They believe that Jim and I . . . ?”
“Yais. Sorry ta say they do. They’re always ready ta believe the worst about a person.” Elle’s blue eyes were full of fire as if ready for a fight.
“That’s not true, Aunt Elle. Not everyone believes it. It’s Elvina and Meghan.”
“Yais, well the others seem to be going along, I’d say.” Elle offered Rebecca a comforting smile. “And that’s not all of it.”
“Yais . . . There’s gossip about who the father of yer baby is.”
Stunned, Rebecca looked at those standing about. “How could anyone . . . How could they . . . It’s not true, none of it.”
“We know that,” Elle said.
What did Daniel think? Had he heard the gossip? She glanced around. He wasn’t anywhere. He’d missed church. “Have you seen Daniel?”
“I did,” Cambria said. “He was heading into town earlier. I’m afraid he looked angry.”
Had he believed the lies? “He should have come to me and asked me. I would have told him the truth.”
“People believe what they want.”
“Aunt Elle, ya can’t be so pessimistic. Most folks want ta be fair. They’re willin’ ta hear from the family.”
Rebecca turned to Cambria. “What about you? What do you believe?”
“How can ya ask me such a thing? I know ya too well ta believe such folderol. Ya’d never do such a thing.”
“Thank you,” Rebecca said, but she felt only a measure of relief.
Willa’s face looked stormy as she walked away from the ladies. She marched toward Rebecca.
“Oh no. She believes them,” Rebecca said.
“We’re leaving,” Willa snapped. “I’ll have nothing to do with people who are . . . no more than . . . than . . . gossips.” She rested a hand on Rebecca’s arm and offered a reassuring smile.
“Thank the good Lord,” Rebecca said. “For a moment I thought you might believe them.”
“Of course I don’t. I know you would never be unfaithful to Daniel.” She glanced toward town. “I only wish my son had as much sense.”
“He believes it?” Rebecca felt as if the ground had dropped out from beneath her. She grabbed hold of the wagon wheel. “How can he?”
“I don’t know, dear. Sometimes men have no more sense than a wild boar.” She took Rebecca’s arm. “Woodman will take us home.” She nodded at Cambria and Elle. “Good day to you, ladies.”
Once settled in the surrey, Rebecca could feel the sting of tears. She blinked hard and kept her eyes straight ahead. As they moved away from the church, people stared, their expressions laden with condemnation. A handful offered encouraging nods or smiles. At least some didn’t believe the lies.
Daniel and his father joined the family. His jaw squared and back straight, Daniel rode ahead of the surrey, unwilling to even look at Rebecca.
“Willa, how can I make him listen to me?”
“You can’t, not right away. Give him time. His good sense will return.”
Rebecca settled back. Anger was beginning to override her shock and her hurt. How can he believe I would be disloyal? I’m an honorable woman—he knows that.
When they arrived at Douloo, Daniel rode ahead, left his horse in the corral, marched toward the house, and disappeared through the front door.
“Don’t worry ’bout ’im,” Woodman said. “He’ll find ’is way soon enough. Just needs time, eh?”
“Time to what?” Rebecca asked, her anger boiling. “Either he believes me or he doesn’t.” She stepped out of the carriage and followed Daniel indoors and up the stairs to their room.
Standing in the bedroom doorway, she watched Daniel pack his clothes into a traveling case. He ignored her.
Finally she asked, “What do you think you’re doing?”
“I’m moving to another room. I’ll not share a bed with a . . . with a whore.” His eyes bore into hers.
“How dare you speak to me in such a way! You’re my husband!”
Daniel stopped packing and stared at Rebecca. “Maybe you should have remembered that sooner.”
“You know I’d never do such a thing. I’ve never been interested in Jim . . . Mr. Keller.”
“I’ve tried to deny it. But I’ve seen the two of you. He hangs around you like a moth about a lantern. You share a heritage. And we both know you’ve never belonged ’ere. You’ve never really belonged to me.”
“Up until this moment I’ve valued your character and have been proud to call you husband. And I’ve believed that as your wife my place was here.”
Daniel shook his head. “There’s nothing I can do to change what’s happened.” He shoved a pair of socks into the bag, then turned anguished eyes on Rebecca. “I can’t even be certain the child you’re carrying is mine.”
She rested a hand on her abdomen. “Of course it’s yours. I’ve never been unfaithful. Never.”
“I want to believe you. But I’ve seen too much.”
“Talk to Jim. He’ll tell you.”
“You really think I’d trust the likes of him?” He stuffed more socks into the bag. “Anyway, he’s gone. My father fired him.”
Rebecca felt lightheaded and gripped the door frame. What could she say that would make him hear?
“Maybe you’d like to go with him.” Daniel pushed past her.
Gazing through a pool of tears, Rebecca stared at her husband’s back as he stormed down the hallway and disappeared down the staircase.
She stumbled into the bedroom and sat on the bed. Heavy sobs shook her body. This couldn’t be happening.
Spent, Rebecca lay on her side, her knees bent and tucked in close to her abdomen. If only she could sleep. A floorboard creaked, and she pushed herself up on one arm. Bertram stood just inside the door.
For a long while he stared at her. “I’d like to have ya thrown out, but . . . we can’t always have what we want. Ya’ve broken my son’s heart . . . mine too. But worse, ya’ve broken God’s heart. His condemnation will come upon ya.”
Sitting up straight and squaring her shoulders, Rebecca said, “I don’t expect you to believe me, but I’m innocent. It’s all lies—utterly and completely untrue.” She met his hostile gaze. “I’ll be returning to Boston on the first ship. Soon you won’t have to worry about me.” The words sounded empty; Rebecca felt empty.
“That’s not possibl
e. The child yer carrying may be my grandchild. We won’t know until after it’s born. Ya’ll stay until we do know. I can tell a Thornton when I see one.”
Rebecca couldn’t think of anything else to say. She was powerless.
Bertram turned and walked out.
22
Suppressing a shiver, Rebecca stood at the sitting room window and stared out at a soggy world. The air felt chill and damp. She was dismal, alone. Callie and Willa seemed to be the only two in all of Queensland who hadn’t charged her with the crime of infidelity. Even Cambria hadn’t visited.
She missed Daniel. He rarely made it in before dark, filling his days and evenings with work. When he managed to make an evening meal, he said only what was necessary, then retired to his room or to the library.
In spite of her justifiable anger, she couldn’t help but notice the dark smudges beneath Daniel’s eyes and the considerable amount of weight he’d lost. She worried about him. The handsome, fun-loving man she’d met in Boston had departed. She longed to see his mischievous smile, the wink of an eye. Instead, he remained aloof, speaking to Rebecca only when necessary.
“Mrs. Thornton was hopin’ ya could join ’er,” Callie said, startling Rebecca.
Rebecca turned and looked at Callie. She didn’t feel like visiting, but Willa might help shake off the doldrums. “I guess I could use a bit of company,” she said, offering a smile.
She took a sweater from the coat rack, draped it over her shoulders, and stepped outside. The air was heavy with moisture. Plants and flowers drooped beneath the weight of rain. Droplets like jewels rested on broad-leaved plants, and miniature ponds dotted a muddy yard.
“Rebecca dear,” Willa said. “Come, have a cuppa with me. I’ve missed our chats.”
Rebecca moved to a chair across from Willa and sat. “I haven’t felt much like talking. I apologize.”
“No need. I understand.”
A small table with a teakettle and matching saucers and cups sat between the two women. “Tea?” Willa asked.
“Yes. Maybe something hot will drive away the chill.”
Willa filled a cup and handed it to Rebecca. “I dare say, you look tired. Are you all right?”
“I’m fine,” Rebecca said. Nothing could be accomplished by sharing her misery.
“And the baby?”
Rebecca glanced at her slightly rounded stomach. “Its growing, but I haven’t felt any movement yet.” Daniel and I ought to be sharing the joy of this child, she thought, sipping her tea and watching the rain. “I’m beginning to wonder if the rain will ever cease.”
“It will, soon. The men are planning to move a mob of cattle south to the railroad station as soon as the sun reappears. The grasses will be plentiful along the way. The animals should be in good condition when they arrive. We’ve done right well this year. The calves are strong and healthy, and so is the herd.”
Only half listening, Rebecca nodded. How could she be concerned about cattle when her life was in shreds? The entire district thought her an adulteress, including her husband. Each passing day her desire for home grew stronger. Aunt Mildred would believe her. In Boston she would be safe and loved.
“Rebecca, you can’t let your mood continue to be so sullen. It’s not good for you or the child.”
Rebecca’s anger churned. “If it’s not a Thornton as people claim, why would anyone care?” Setting her cup down hard on the table, she stood and walked to the railing. She glanced at Willa. “If your husband believes me an adulteress, why won’t he allow me to leave?”
“He explained that.” Willa’s eyes radiated tenderness. “Not everyone believes the rumors.”
Willa’s kindness deflated Rebecca’s anger. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude. You have been kind.” She leaned a hip against the balustrade. “But . . . I can’t stay. I must return to Boston soon. You understand, don’t you?”
“Yes, I suppose I do.”
“Couldn’t you speak to your husband?”
“I already have. He won’t budge. I’m sorry. I know this is dreadful for you, but you must trust God to work it out. He knows the beginning and the end of all things.” She offered a small smile. “I’d miss you terribly if you were to go, and I’m so looking forward to meeting my grandchild.”
Rebecca returned to her chair. “Have you spoken to Daniel about any of this?”
“He doesn’t want to talk about it.”
“Why won’t he believe me?”
“I can’t be certain.” She raised an eyebrow slightly. “Perhaps it has to do with your marrying him out of need. I’m quite certain he loves you.”
“Yes. He told me so. But it seems he should know me well enough to realize I’d never betray him.”
“Sometimes men are reasonable and strong and brave. I’m grateful for that, but . . . there are times when they allow uncertainty to rule their minds. Daniel’s always had difficulty with confidence. I fear his father had much to do with it. He was hard on the boys.”
Her eyes took on a look of reminiscence. “Elton wasn’t like Daniel. Right off he was stubborn. As he grew older he became defiant. That’s what got him into trouble.” Her eyes shimmered.
Rebecca held her breath. Willa had never spoken about her eldest son.
“He had too much brass for his father’s liking. The two never got on well. Of course, when he was a boy it was different. They’d tussle and play.” She smiled at the memory. “I can still hear Elton’s giggles.” She was silent for a long moment. “Right around the time he turned thirteen, things began to change. He stood up to his father and refused to do as he was told.” She shook her head. “The skirmishes began and continued until the day Elton left.” Her voice fell off, and sorrow lay in the lines of her face.
“What about you, Willa? Do you ever stand up to your husband?”
“My, yes. We’ve had our rows now and again. But I know my place, and I never push too hard. Over the years I’ve watched and prayed while Bertram carried his family’s and community’s burdens.” Her eyes settled on Rebecca’s. “He has overstepped the bounds, but he doesn’t understand that.”
“Have you told him?”
“Indeed, but he doesn’t see, and I can’t make him. He must be willing to open his eyes.” She set her cup on its saucer. “One day he’ll know the truth. I pray it won’t come at too great a price.”
A rider approached. It was Meghan. Rebecca’s annoyance immediately flared. Ever since Daniel and Rebecca’s falling out, the brazen interloper had stepped up her visits to the Thornton home. This time she dismounted, tied her horse to the corral fence, and strode into the barn.
“What is it she needs today?” Rebecca asked, her voice dripping with contempt.
Willa didn’t answer.
Rebecca eyed her mother-in-law. Something was wrong. “What is she doing here?”
“She’s helping the men prepare for the drive.”
“And?”
“She’s going with them.”
“I thought it was a man’s job.”
“It is. But Meghan’s not like other women. She’s joined them every year since her twelfth birthday.” Sympathetic eyes rested on Rebecca. “You have no need to worry.”
The rain stopped and the temperatures warmed. The drovers set out. Her arms folded over her chest, Rebecca stood at her bedroom window and watched while Meghan and Daniel rode away. Her heart ached. Was it merely jealousy or something more?
He didn’t even bother to say good-bye, she thought. Resting a hand on her abdomen, she considered what should have been, and the hurt grew. Pressing the palm of her right hand against her stomach, she opened her fingers wide. “Little one, I’m so sorry. I wanted better for you. I never meant for this to happen.”
Closing her eyes, she sought God, but he felt far away. “Lord, I ask for your mercy. You are able to do all things. I beg you to soften Bertram’s and Daniel’s hearts—help them to see the truth. Show them that this child belongs to Daniel and me.” She opened
her eyes and watched the dust rising from the riders. “And help me to love my husband.”
Although Rebecca did her best to fill the days with activities, they seemed long and meaningless. She worked in the garden when the weather allowed, helped Lily in the kitchen, and visited Callie. They chatted while feeding the chickens and collecting eggs. Rebecca even helped make up beds. And of course there was always needlework. One afternoon she rested on the settee in the sitting room, embroidering a spray of roses on a handkerchief. The ticking of the clock seemed loud, and Willa rocked and stitched in rhythm to each stroke of the pendulum.
When the chair’s creaking stopped, Rebecca looked up from her work. Willa was asleep, a nearly completed baby’s blanket in her lap. Rebecca reached for a coverlet draped over the settee and gently covered Willa. You are a treasure, she thought. If only the rest of the world was like you.
She walked out to the veranda. Sunshine brightened the yard and paddocks. How could the world look washed and clean when life was so foul? Maybe a walk will help, Rebecca thought, stepping off the porch and strolling toward the corral. Rena stood munching hay. A ride would settle me, she thought. But there would be no riding. She knew better than to go alone. Plus, the doctor had stated she was not to sit a horse until after the baby was born.
The mare trotted to her mistress and nuzzled her arm. Rebecca ran her hand down the front of the animal’s face, then caressed her soft nose. “I know, girl. I wish we could ride. I’ll give you a good brushing though. That’s nearly as good.” She walked into the barn to get a currycomb and a brush.
After the brightness of the yard, the inside of the building seemed especially dark. Rebecca knew her way and didn’t hesitate. She walked into the tack room and took the comb and brush off a shelf. When she turned to leave, her eyes fell upon a black man who worked at the station. He appeared to be sleeping on the floor. Then she saw it—a spear. It penetrated his stomach.
Rebecca suppressed a scream and hurried for the door, where she stopped and turned to study the man. He wasn’t moving. Was he dead? She stepped closer, then reached out and touched him. His skin was cool and unyielding. The spear protruded from his back. Rebecca dropped the comb and brush and ran for the house.