by Gail Dayton
With both hands he tore the fragile-seeming garment that attempted to cover her sex. Stronger than it appeared, the elastic around one leg defied him, but it didn't matter as Ellen guided him inside her. With one thrust, he seated himself deep, the side of his face pressed against the rough plaster of the wall. His hands cupped her buttocks to hold her tighter. The glorious feel of her wet heat enfolding him told him of his careless neglect of protection, but he did not care. If he got her with child, he would have at least that link to bind her to him, no matter the miles between.
"Rudi," Ellen whispered, and touched her lips to the tender spot beneath his ear.
He captured her mouth in another kiss to prevent her from saying more. She twined her leg high around his back, hooking her toes between his thighs. Rudi groaned. His hips began to move, quickly finding the rhythm his body required. Ellen met him, thrust for thrust, until she sent her cry into his kiss and her climax demanded his equal response.
Long minutes later, when he finally began to catch his breath, Ellen's leg slipped slowly down the back of his until her foot reached the balcony floor. Only then did the realization of what he had done truly hit him, like a boulder to the head.
He had made love to Ellen on a balcony, open to the gardens in view of anyone who happened to look in this direction. He had made love to her standing up, fully clothed—or almost—and in such a hurry that he had not thought about protection until too late.
Rudi groaned, hiding his face in her neck. He could not bring himself to pull his clothing together, for that would require space between them, space that would allow him to see the anger in her face.
But the fingers trailing through his hair did not feel angry. They felt nice. Comforting. Contented. He took a deep breath, inhaling essence of Ellen.
"Rudi?" She spoke again.
He took another deep breath and let it sigh out. They would have to speak sometime. Now was as good as any.
"Yes, Ellen?" His words were muffled by her neck.
"You never did ask what the dare was that brought me here."
She twined one of his curls around her finger. He did not want to move, did not want her to stop, but it was time. He summoned up his resolve.
"No, I did not." Rudi stepped away from her, her skirt falling into place again as he did. He took a moment to retie his drawstring and smooth the tunic down over his pants, aware of her eyes watching him.
Ellen reached beneath her skirt and pulled off her torn undergarment, leaving it lying on the floor where she stepped out of it. His passion stirred as he watched her, desire lifting its head, but he could deny it now.
Her gaze caught his and held it. "I dare you," she said, "to ask me what dare brought me to Qarif."
Rudi shrugged. "What matters is that you are here. Is why of any importance?"
"Are you afraid to ask?"
She stepped toward him, and he backed away. Knowing what she did not wear beneath her skirt made it imperative that he keep his distance.
"Ask me," she said, taking another step.
"Ellen, if we are to talk…" He sent a significant glance downward. "Please, do not come closer."
"Ask." She held her ground, her eyes insisting along with her voice. "I dare you."
"What brought you to Qarif?" He snapped the words out like the crack of a whip.
"Ibrahim dared me."
Rudi waited, refusing to ask for more.
Ellen sank onto the foot of the lounge and looked up at him. The vulnerability in her eyes made him want to kiss it away, but if he kissed her, it would not be enough.
"Ibrahim said I was wrong about why you left Oklahoma in such a hurry. He dared me to come here and prove that he was wrong and I was right."
"And are you? Right?" His heart began to beat harder with hope, though his head knew there was none.
"I don't know." She bit her lower lip to still its quivering. "I can't— That was some hello you gave me, but I still can't quite believe…"
She stopped and took a deep breath. "Rudi, do you hate me?"
"What?" The word burst from him as her ridiculous question brought him to kneel beside her. Rudi took her hand and held it tight as he searched her face. "How can you believe such a thing?"
"I brought those terrorists down on you. They only found you because they followed me." Tears flowed down her cheeks faster than his fingers could wipe them away. "And then I was useless—worse than useless—when they came after you with their machine guns. I'm a failure, Rudi. How can you not hate me?"
"How can I hate you, when I love you, zahra?" He sat on the lounge and gathered her in, rocking her gently back and forth. "You saved my life when you pushed me away from the car explosion. You took my injury, my hurt upon yourself."
Rudi touched the spot on her forehead where she had hit it, knocking herself semiconscious, then he kissed it. "Will you not allow me the privilege of protecting my beloved, as a man should?"
Ellen sniffled, wiping her eyes on his shoulder. "You love me?"
"I do."
She punched him gently on the arm. "Then why did you leave? Why did you go away and leave me to wake up all by myself with Frank pounding on the door? I thought you were giving me another chance, and then you were gone before I could even take it."
"I am sorry, my flower." He kissed her forehead again. "I wanted to protect you. Only two of the terrorists were captured in Oklahoma. I feared if they came after me again, the next time they would not simply bump your head. I never meant to cause you any pain. I never dreamed that my leaving would do such a thing."
"You never—" Ellen sat up and stared at him in disbelief.
Rudi smiled, brushing back the hair that had fallen into her face. "You have never said that you care for me, my Ellen. I believe—now—that you do. But you have never said it."
"Oh, Rudi." Fresh tears welled up in her eyes. "I'm such an idiot. I—"
"Just say it. Please?" He needed to hear it. A man should be strong enough to say the truth without needing to hear the same words in return, but Rudi was not so strong.
"I love you, Rudi." She cupped his face between her hands. "I love you, Rashid ibn Saqr ibn Faruq al Mukhtar Qarif. I love you by whatever name you want to use. I love you wherever you are. I love—"
Rudi couldn't wait for more confessions of love. He kissed her, sharing with her all the feelings he'd kept imprisoned inside himself for so long.
"I want you to know, Rudi-Rashid," Ellen said when he finally let her go, "that no matter where you go or what you do, I can find you. I will find you. I've already done it more than once, so you know I can. You're never going to get away from me again. So you can just forget that 'I left to protect you' junk. We'll just have to look out for each other. You got it?"
"In that case…" Rudi placed careful kisses across her forehead, her eyelids, her cheeks, lining them up in rows. "You should marry me. Since you have already promised that I have no escape. We should be equally bound, do you not agree?"
"Do you mean it?" She looked up at him, eyes wide with uncertainty.
He sighed, exasperated. "Ellen, I have already asked you once to marry me. This is twice. Do not make me ask you a third time. If I did not mean it, I would not ask it."
"What about—?" She waved her hand vaguely at the palace surrounding them.
"We have time to work out the details. Ibrahim dared you to come. My family will not object." He took hold of her shoulders and looked her in the eyes, letting his determination show. "I insist that you make an honest man of me. Say yes, Ellen."
She smiled, and his sudden worry left him.
"Yes, Ellen," she said.
Rudi lifted his eyes heavenward to offer a quick thanks before he wrapped her in a close embrace. Holding her tight, he pressed a kiss to the top of her head.
"I love you, zahra. And I swear that you will never have to go in search of this prince again. Where you are, there I will be, and wherever we are together, that will be home."
Gail Dayton, Hide-and-Sheikh