The girls couldn’t help themselves. They looked at Markie, then at one another. Then they burst out laughing.
“Sami, you’re my best friend in the world, right?”
“Of course, sweetie. Why?”
“Would you do me a big favor?”
“Sure, what?”
“If I ever come to you and say, Sami, I’m thinking of having some children of my own…”
She turned and looked at Sami.
“… would you take a baseball bat and beat me over the head until I come back to my senses?”
“Sure, honey. It’s the least I can do for a friend.”
“Markie, come on, sweetie. We’re finished. We’ll go chase the chickens now. But you have to put your clothes on first.”
Instead, he stood in front of them with his hands on his hips and announced “I gots peepee.”
Sarah said, “Yes, sir. We noticed. But you have to put your clothes back on if you want to chase chickens.”
“I gots peepee. Bullshit. Bullshit.”
Sami rolled her eyes.
“Oh, great, here we go again.”
After Markie wore himself out chasing chickens, he announced to the girls, “I tired now. I ready for my nap.”
Sarah muttered, “Thank God!” under her breath as she gathered him up and carried him back home to his RV.
They knocked on the door and Hannah shouted, “Come in!”
“Mommy!”
Sarah put Markie down and he went running to where Hannah was laying on the couch, watching a movie on television.
“Thank you guys for watching him. Was he any trouble?”
Sami and Sarah looked at each other, then shook their heads at the same time and said, “No, not at all. We had fun.”
Markie chose that moment to play some more with his new word.
“Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit!”
“Markie, no! Do not use that word!”
“Sorry Mommy. I love you.”
“I love you too, tiny sailor.”
Sarah said, “Hannah, I swear to God, we did not teach him that word!”
Hannah looked at her with an angry face. Then she laughed.
“Oh, I know. He heard it the other day when Mark and Bryan were arguing about their tunnel. They said it, and then he said it, and they thought it was so cute they encouraged him to say it some more. I wanted to kill them.”
Sami said, “I’ll help.”
The three enjoyed a bit of laughter while Markie fell asleep on Hannah’s shoulder.
“Did you finish your inventory?”
“Well, yes. With the counting part, anyway. We still have to do all the math, but we’ll have it all ready at the weekly meeting tomorrow night. It looks like we’ve got plenty of food for several more years. The kitchen staff is doing a great job of minimizing waste and using everything before it spoils.”
“Well, that’s great news. Did you happen to see the guys out there?”
“No, they’re playing in their tunnel again.”
“Have you two ever been in the tunnel?”
“No, why?”
“They keep it so hush hush. They never talk about it to anybody else, like it’s a top secret project or something.”
“I think they’ve regressed back to their childhoods. Like it’s their secret fort and they’re playing G.I. Joe or something.”
“Wait a minute. Remember you’re talking about Mark and Bryan. I don’t think they ever really progressed much beyond their childhood.”
“Good point. So it would be a very short trip back.”
“Hey, you don’t think that maybe they have strippers down there, or a secret topless night club or something?”
“No. Then the word would have gotten out and every single man in the mine would be down there every day. And the boys would be trying to sneak their way in.”
“What is it with men and boobs anyway?”
“Oh, don’t even get me started.”
“Hey, I know we can’t do it now because the baby’s sleeping. But how about if tomorrow we just crash their mine?”
“Literally, like blow it up?”
“No, silly. We crash it like we’d crash a party. We just walk in and check the place out.”
“Okay, that sounds like fun. Let’s do it.”
Sarah put her hand on Hannah’s forehead and said, “You look flushed, Sweetie, and you feel a little warm. Are you okay?”
“Yes, I’m fine. Just a little fever is all. I thought when we were all isolated in here we wouldn’t catch colds any more. I mean, how could I catch a cold when nobody else in here has one? Who did I catch it from?”
“I think you’re thinking of the flu, dear. I don’t think you really catch a cold. I think it’s just something your body does when it’s in a weakened state, and the right conditions come along. The flu, on the other hand, is a virus. It’s passed from one person to another. And you’re right. Since we’re no longer exposed to the outside world, none of us should ever catch the flu again.”
“Yay! No more flu shots!”
“Ever?”
“Ever.”
Chapter 16
The following day, Hannah tucked Markie safely in bed for his morning nap. She had asked her niece Anna to keep an eye on him. Anna was Debbie’s daughter, seven years old now and full of life. She’d been begging for the chance to babysit, and although Hannah thought she was much too young, perhaps it was time to ease her into it.
“Now, all you have to do is keep an eye on him. The TV won’t wake him up, as long as you keep it down low. Neither will the Wii if you leave the volume turned off. Just watch him, and if he starts to wake up, call me on the walkie talkie and I’ll come back.”
“Okay, and thank you Aunt Hannah.”
“Thank me for what, honey?”
“Thank you for not treating me like a kid. Everybody treats me like a kid, but I’m almost eight, for crying out loud.”
“I know, honey. They did the same thing to me when I was almost eight. And I hated it too. But it’ll change soon, I promise. As soon as they see how mature and responsible you are, they’ll change the way they look at you. Just try to be patient.”
“Okay. And I’ll take good care of Markie. You can count on me.”
Hannah smiled and kissed her on the forehead. Then she quietly left her RV and walked over to pick up Sarah and Sami in Bay 8.
They were in the TV lounge watching a movie.
“Oh, I’ve seen this before. I can’t remember the name of it. What’s it called?”
“Who cares? It has Richard Gere in it.”
“You’re hopeless, Sami. We need to get you a man.”
“Yeah, right. Easy for you to say. You’ve got one. And in case you haven’t looked around here lately, the picking is kinda slim.”
“I don’t know, I’ve seen Robert looking at you with those Paul Newman eyes of his.”
“Oh, please. Robert only has eyes for those vehicles he works on all day long. And he always smells like motor oil.”
“Well, he is a vehicle mechanic, after all. And I’ve always thought the smell of motor oil was sexy on a man. I think you should give him a chance.”
“If you think oil smells sexy, then you take him. I’ll trade you him for Mark.”
Hannah looked at Sarah and said, “Oh, no she didn’t.”
Sarah answered, “Hey, leave me out of this. I refuse to take sides because I think you’re both equally nuts. But I will say this, Sami. Hannah’s not right about very many things, but she’s right about Robert. I’ve seen the way he looks at you too. He’s not Richard Gere, but he’s not bad looking either. And he’s a great guy. You should at least talk to him.”
Sami shrugged and said, “Maybe. He is kinda cute when he grins.”
“There you go, girl. Now, let’s go visit the tunnel before my tiny sailor wakes up.”
They walked to Bay 24, past the orange traffic cones and the sign that said “CAUTION: OPEN PIT.”<
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They walked down the wooden stair steps at the mouth of the tunnel and were instantly amazed at what they saw.
For as far as they could see, a passageway stretched into the earth. Covered with wooden walls and an arched steel roof, with naked light bulbs installed in the upper right part of the tunnel every ten feet or so. On the floor to their right was a huge industrial fan, blowing a torrent of air into the tunnel. Up ahead, in the distance, they could make out a white cloud.
And as they watched the cloud, a figure took shape in it, and then emerged from it. A ghostly white figure that took the shape of a man, and then a man they recognized. It was Mark’s cousin Brad.
Brad put down the two buckets he was carrying and took off the respirator he was wearing to greet them.
“Well good morning. What brings you lovely ladies into the fiery pits of hell?”
“Oh, we just wanted to check the place out. To see if we could catch you guys playing cards, or watching dirty movies, or whatever you do down here all day.”
He laughed and said, “Well, if you’re going any further, put on a respirator. Pull the straps good and tight over the back of your head, to keep the salt dust out of your lungs. It can do a lot of damage if you’re not careful.
He pointed to the tunnel wall behind them. Several nails had been hammered into the wood, and on most of the nails hung respirator masks. Two of the nails were empty. Sarah guessed that’s where Mark and Bryan’s hung when they weren’t being used.
“Thanks, Brad. What’s in the buckets?”
“Salt. Chunks and powder. From the drills. We have a rule. You can’t leave the tunnel for any reason without carrying out two buckets. For chow, for bathroom breaks, at the end of each shift. For any reason at all. When we leave the tunnel, we haul out the waste. It’ll apply to you girls too, so I hope you brought your muscles with you.”
He went up the steps and out of the tunnel. The girls put respirators on and headed into the abyss.
Sixty yards later they entered the cloud of salt dust and their visibility decreased by half. After a minute they heard the high pitched whine of machinery. A little farther and they heard voices. On the floor to their left was a long line of bright orange buckets, like the two David had been carrying. Each of the buckets said “Home Depot Painter’s Bucket” on its side. And each one was filled about three quarters full with powdered salt.
On their right side about a hundred yards in was a second industrial fan, identical to the first, blowing another high powered blast of air down the right side of the tunnel. They noticed that on the left side, the cloud of salt was slowly drifting outward, in the direction where they’d come.
They guessed that the fans not only brought fresh air in for the tunnelers, it also served to help clear out the dust they were generating.
They kept going through the white haze until they came to Mark, standing at the end of the tunnel shaft, holding a portable drill with a six inch auger blade at a 90 degree angle from his body. Behind him, Bryan used a leaf rake to pull the debris from around Mark’s feet and back a few feet, where he could then scoop it up with a flat shovel and dump it into buckets. Bryan saw the girls first, and was totally surprised, although the look on his face was hidden by the respirator.
He tapped Mark on the shoulder, and Mark turned around to see the three girls. He turned off the drill, placed it on the floor of the tunnel, and used hand signals to motion everyone back, out of the dust cloud.
The girls started out, and Mark yelled, “Hey!” from under his respirator. It was really unintelligible, but loud enough for the girls to hear and it stopped them in their tracks. Mark handed each of them a bucket to carry back with them.
Sarah muttered, “Crap!” to herself, but each of them lugged their bucket back as instructed. The boys followed them carrying two buckets apiece.
When they cleared the salty fog, Mark pulled off his respirator and said, “That’s far enough, girls. You can put them down there and I’ll get them later. Thanks for your help.”
Hannah said, “Anytime, sailor. And by ‘anytime,’ I really mean never again. I’d kiss you but you’re all yuck.”
She was right. Mark and Bryan, like Brad had been, were solid sheets of white. They looked like skinny polar bears, except for the parts of their faces that the respirators had covered.
“What are y’all doing here?” Bryan asked.
“We just wanted to get the grand tour, and to see if you were really working, or just goofing off.”
Sami said, “I have to admit it’s pretty impressive. Much better than the little crawlspace I envisioned.”
Hannah looked at the tunnel wall and added, “Now I recognize these things. These are those eight thousand fence posts you had me order a few months before we came in here.”
Mark said, “Yep. Eight thousand fence posts, six feet tall and four inches square. And the metal pieces above your head are steel reinforced arches. Especially made for mine tunnels. Also four inches wide, with a load capacity of 12,800 pounds per square foot. It’s like a big tinker toy set, really. We dig out another four inches of salt, put a fence post on each side, and pound an arch support piece onto the top of them with a sledge hammer. Then we clean up the mess and grind out another four inches.”
“Pretty impressive. How far do you get in a day?”
“Well, when we first started, we were lucky to advance four inches a day. But like a lot of other things, this is something you get better at the more you do it. Now we have it down to a science, and we’re moving at twelve to sixteen inches a day.”
“Wow! Good for you!”
Sami piped in, “But hey, wait a minute. You’re all covered in salt. But you don’t look that way when you come back to join the rest of us every day. What’s up with that?”
Hannah suddenly realized why the pair had so many secrets.
“You guys are showering every day after you finish, aren’t you?”
Bryan held a finger up to his lips and said, “Shhhhh.”
Mark explained.
“Back at the end of Bay 24, about two hundred feet or so, we’ve set up some portable showers. Every day, we have an alarm set to go off at exactly five o’clock. That tells us it’s time to knock off. We hit the portable showers to get all the salt off us, change into clean clothes, and then sit around planning for the next day while we wait for our hair to dry. Then we rejoin everybody else at the other end of the mine.”
Bryan noticed the cold stare he was getting from Sarah.
“Hey, I promise, it’s not a luxury type of shower. It’s just to get clean. And the only reason we kept it a secret was so nobody would complain that we were getting more showers than anybody else.”
Mark added, “And the showers are set up over kiddie pools that catch all the water. It’s recycled with all the other gray water, so it’s not like we’re wasting it.”
He looked at Hannah and said, “Of course, if you want, we can skip the shower, and come back looking like this every evening.”
“Oh, no, I don’t think I’d like that.”
Mark gave Hannah a salty kiss. Bryan leaned over for a kiss from Sarah, but she backed away. “Na-uh, not me!” She reached for his hand and shook it instead.
Bryan looked at Mark and said, “We’d better get back to work if we want to make it to the two hundred yard mark today.”
The two put their respirators back on, and Mark pointed to his heart and then to Hannah. Then the pair waved and disappeared back into the white haze.
Hannah picked her bucket back up and the others looked at her. She said, “Hey, we’re heading that way anyway, right? Might as well help.”
Sarah rolled her eyes and Sami grunted, but both followed their friend’s lead and picked up their buckets.
After struggling with them to the top of the stairs, they encountered Brad, who had finished his bathroom break and was headed back into the tunnel.
Sami asked, “Hey, Brad, where do we empty these things?”
>
“Head toward the back of the bay about fifty yards or so. There’s a forklift parked back there, and just past the forklift you’ll see a big pile of salt powder and chunks. Just dump them and leave the buckets there. I’ll get them later. And thanks for your help, ladies.”
The girls followed his directions and dumped the buckets on a huge pile of tunnel waste.
“There’s their shower,” Hannah noted, pointing toward the back of the bay about fifty yards past the salt pile. They went over to check it out.
The shower was no more than a string of three shower heads, mounted onto a two by four about eight feet apart. The two by four was mounted on the wall and fed by a water hose coming from the front of the bay. A small electric water heater was placed between a water valve and the wall.
The last light bulb in the bay was directly over their heads. The bay stretched another hundred yards into the mountain, but this was where the light stopped.
They looked into the dark abyss, and could barely make out, thirty yards in, several stacks of fence posts and arches. Supplies for the rest of the tunnel.
Sarah looked at Hannah and giggled. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
They looked at Sami, who smiled a wicked smile and said, “Let’s do it!”
The boys had told them their alarm went off at exactly five p.m., at which time they wrapped things up and quite literally hit the showers.
At precisely 4:45, in stealthy movements that would have impressed the most proficient of ninjas, the girls snuck past the entrance to the tunnel. Dressed in dark clothing and carrying binoculars, they disappeared into the darkness at the end of the bay. They hid behind the pallets of fence posts, and because they were in the darkness, they could see without being seen.
Sure enough, at five after five, a trio of walking, talking snowmen came ambling through the bay toward them, each carrying two buckets of waste. They emptied the buckets, stacked them on the stack of three empties the girls had left there earlier, and turned on the water to their showers.
The girls watched through binoculars as the three men took off their clothes and stepped into the kiddie pools beneath the showers.
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