by Janey Fraser
‘Mrs Merryfield, Mrs Merryfield, my mum’s just sent me a picture text to say she can’t come. But our au pair is coming instead.’
‘Mrs Merryfield, Mrs Merryfield, I need a wee wee.’
Too late.
‘Anyone got a cloth? And a spare pair of pants?’
‘Gemmie, darling?’
Gemma blinked. When she’d casually issued an invitation to her parents, she hadn’t thought they’d come. What was it her father had said again? Something about a first-class degree being wasted on a nursery career, if her memory was right.
‘Mum! You came!’
‘Yes, dear. A nice man called Mr Balls showed us where to sit. He said he worked with you.’
It was then that she noticed her mother’s eyes were damp with tears. Don’t say something had happened to Tom! Gemma reached out for her arm. ‘What’s wrong, Mum?’
‘Nothing, darling, nothing.’ Her mother blew her nose. ‘It’s just that we didn’t realise, your father and I, how much they all love you here.’
Thank heavens the tears weren’t due to her brother. A huge tide of relief went through her as her mother babbled on. ‘Every time we mention that you’re our daughter, all the parents tell us how amazing you are Look at your father over there with your headmistress!’
Dad was talking to Beryl, who was nodding animatedly and glancing over in her direction with approving smiles.
‘Actually Mum, I’d quite like you to meet someone.’ Gemma looked around for Barry, who was also meant to be here. She should have told them about her engagement before but something had stopped her. Was it because, deep down, she’d always had doubts? Or was it, as she’d told herself, there was too much going on at school and she’d wanted to wait until she saw them? Well, now the time was finally here. ‘Remember me telling you about the paratrooper I’d met?’
Her mother blew her nose. ‘Goodness me, dear, you don’t want to get distracted by some young man. Not when you’ve got a career like this. Now, what time does the curtain rise? I just can’t wait! By the way darling, you look lovely. Absolutely lovely.’
Gemma wove her way through the demands, pleas and compliments towards the children’s loos. She remembered the time she had caught Joe in there. Poor man had been mortified! How cruel she had been to laugh about it afterwards. It was only a few months ago, but now, she told herself, standing in front of the mirror over the basins, it seemed like a lifetime.
Gemma had been wearing the dress for an hour now, and had merely felt a very small twinge when she had slipped into it. It was slightly tight round the waist, but the only other difference was in her state of mind. When she’d worn it for her wedding, she had felt sick with excitement and a sense of daring.
‘Let’s get married,’ Sam had said five long years ago, and because she hadn’t expected this and because everything seemed so new and full of possibilities now exams were over and they were able to go off back-packing, she had found herself saying yes and then buying the dress from a shop whose windows were dominated by glittery Elvis Presley outfits.
Now, as she looked in the mirror, she felt sorry for the dress and its previous owner, a different Gemma who had literally leaped before she had looked.
‘We’ve grown up, you and I,’ she told the dress. ‘We’ve learned a lot, don’t you think?’
There was a knock on the door. ‘Gemma,’ called Bella. ‘Are you there? You’re first on, remember?’
Smoothing down the cream silk, she swished her way out – bang into Sam. ‘What are you doing here?’ she gasped.
He took a step backwards. ‘I’m so sorry but I needed to find you. To tell you something.’
He glanced behind him to check no one was listening. Bella had gone. ‘The doctors said Danny could come and watch the play. That’s why we’re here. He got so upset at missing it that they said it might do him more harm than good not to come. He’s got to go back tomorrow, just for a day or so, and then they reckon he can be discharged.’
Gemma almost wanted to hug him. ‘That’s amazing.’
Sam was looking nervous. ‘There’s something else too. Nancy. She mustn’t know. About us. I hope that’s not being cowardly but somehow, after Danny, we’ve managed to sort ourselves out and . . .’
Another wave of relief. ‘I absolutely agree.’ The last thing she wanted was to break up a family. ‘It wouldn’t be right.’
Sam was still shifting from foot to foot. ‘But I also wanted you to know how grateful I am. We are. For what you did.’
Gemma bit her lip. ‘It didn’t work though, did it?’
‘But you tried.’
‘Maybe I should have tried to make us work too,’ she said, glancing around to make sure no one was there. ‘I was just so upset when you said you didn’t want children. Now I can see that we should have talked about it first.’
‘Gemma.’
He was taking her hands now. It didn’t feel right.
‘Gemma, we were so young then. Mere babies. We shouldn’t have got married on the spur of the moment like that. It was crazy!’
He was hugging her now.
‘But it all worked out,’ he added, finally stepping back. ‘I have my family and, from what I hear, you’ve got engaged, so it won’t be long before you have yours. I just want you to know that Nancy and I will never forget what you’ve done for us.’
And with that he had gone, wending his way back through the curtain to the audience. What about the dress? Gemma could almost hear Kitty hissing. No problem. Sam hadn’t even noticed it.
‘Gemma!’ Not another interruption. She was on the stage now, behind the closed curtains which were about to go back any minute. Besides, weren’t you meant to give flowers after the performance and not before?
‘I wanted you to have them now.’ Barry stood before her with a bunch of stargazer lilies. He knew they were her favourite but not now, not right now. ‘Thought you might like to carry one along with that wand of yours.’ His eyes swept over her dress. ‘You look lovely.’
Go on, urged Kitty in her head. Tell him. See what he says.
‘It’s my wedding dress.’ Gemma tried to speak casually.
Barry went quiet for a moment, and then threw back his head and laughed. ‘You’ve bought it already?’
‘No.’ Gemma tried to keep her voice steady over the rise of excited backstage chatter. ‘No, it’s the dress I got married in. The first time round.’
Barry’s face tightened. ‘You kept it?’
Gemma nodded.
‘Then it must mean something to you.’
She paused. ‘I thought it did but actually, now I find it doesn’t.’
Barry’s eyes narrowed. ‘I’m not sure I believe you.’
Was this the same man who’d just given her flowers? Not only did his voice sound completely different, but his angry face looked like that of a stranger.
‘In fact,’ he continued, ‘I’m not really sure I believe your story about not finding your husband after your marriage split. It sounds suspiciously to me like you still feel something for him, and that’s why you didn’t look hard enough in case he rejected you. This way, you still had some hope.’
A few weeks ago, he might have been correct. Yet now, as he blustered on, and some of the mums helping backstage looked at them with undisguised curiosity, she felt different. ‘There’s nothing between us now.’
‘Then take it off.’ Barry’s eyes were flashing. ‘If it doesn’t mean anything to you, take it off and wear something else.’
A voice called out from the wings. ‘Two minutes until curtain up, Gemma.’
‘I can’t,’ she whispered. ‘There isn’t time.’
‘Can’t or won’t?’
‘Both.’ As she spoke, Gemma felt her chest lighten as though someone had just burst a huge balloon inside it, allowing her to breathe again. ‘I’ve got to be honest, Barry. I don’t like being told what to do, and you don’t like it when other people don’t do as you think they should.’ G
ently, she eased his ring off her finger. ‘I think you’d better have this back. I’m sorry, but you’ll thank me in the long run.’
‘Gemma! Thirty seconds.’
Feeling amazingly calm, she stepped out towards the curtain just as it was drawn back. In front of her was a sea of faces, and there in the middle of the second row were Sam, Nancy and Danny, staring at her as if they had seen magic, pure magic.
‘Welcome to the Puddleducks nativity play,’ she said. And as she spoke, she could see a tall, lean man with a short army haircut make his way up the side of the hall and out through the back door of her life.
Chapter 63
Welcome to our nativity play!
We hope that later you will stay
For a cup of tea and a biscuit or two
Although there may be a bit of a queue!
But now please sit back and enjoy tonight.
We’ve been practising with all our might!
There’s plenty to entertain you all
No matter whether you’re big or small!
NANCY WATCHED GEMMA standing on the stage as she recited the ‘welcome’ rhymes in that beautiful dress that made her, as Danny had whispered, look like a fairy princess. One of the other mothers had said that Gemma had written the script herself. Nancy wished that she could have been like Gemma, so sure of what she was doing and so nice with it.
Who else would have donated her bone marrow so willingly after being tested, without being asked? Sam was grateful to Gemma, too. When Nancy had gone backstage just before the curtain went back because Brigid urgently needed a safety pin for Billy’s outfit, she’d seen Sam give Gemma a thank-you hug. If there was one good thing that had come out of Danny’s illness, it was Sam being able to show his emotions.
Her heart melted to see him now, with Danny on his knee sitting up bright-eyed and excited. Sam had his arms around his son’s waist to make sure he didn’t slip. Yes. There was no doubt about it. The two had definitely become closer during Danny’s illness.
Her mother leaned towards her, talking in what the English called a stage whisper. ‘Nancy! I’m still not happy about Danny being here. It’s very cold outside. Supposing he catches consumption?’
Her mother had been adopting what she saw as English mannerisms and vocabulary ever since she arrived. The trouble was that the vocabulary belonged to English books published in the 1950s or even earlier. No one used the word ‘consumption’ nowadays, as far as she knew. Besides, they’d been through all this before.
‘The doctor said it was all right,’ whispered Nancy, nodding towards the platform where the Puddleducks were doing a dance. Couldn’t her mother see that they ought not to be talking? Clearly not. Just as she hadn’t taken Nancy’s point the other day that it was time for both her and Patricia to go back to their respective homes.
‘We do love Hazelwood,’ they had chorused when she’d raised the subject. The shops are so pretty, Christabel had said wistfully, while Patricia had made noises about not wanting to go back to an empty house when she could be with her grandson.
‘Shhh,’ said a father in the row in front, turning round to glare at their murmured conversation.
‘Sorry,’ mouthed back Nancy.
Just then a telephone rang, with that shrill tone of a mobile pretending to be a landline. ‘Whoops!’ said a pretty woman in a smart black suit with glossy heels. Getting up from the seat next to the father in front, she noisily made her way past jutting-out knees towards the back. ‘It’s my call from head office in Toronto,’ she exclaimed happily. ‘I do apologise!’
That was Honey’s mother, who’d gone back to work and was now taking conference calls in the middle of her daughter’s nativity play.
‘Sshh.’
That man in front again! Just as it looked as though he was going to say something, a ripple went through the audience as a small, slightly bowed figure bounced on to the stage, wearing a red costume with what looked like maroon jumper sleeves underneath.
‘It’s Bri . . .’ began Patricia excitedly.
‘Mum!’ This time it was Sam shooting his mother a look.
Danny was sitting so far forward that he was in danger of falling over. ‘Father Christmas,’ he said in a hushed, reverent voice.
He leaned across his two grandmothers and grabbed Nancy’s arm. ‘Do you think he’s got my letter?’
Nancy didn’t need to worry about the disturbance this time. Santa’s appearance on stage had got everyone excited. The children in the audience, who didn’t seem to recognise Brian, were leaping up and down in their seats, while the children on stage seemed equally mesmerised.
Brian’s surprise appearance was also causing ripples amongst some of the adults who had spotted the former teacher, and were giving him a warm ‘welcome back’ clap. His popularity couldn’t have been easy for Joe, his successor, to live up to. Joe was, so she’d heard, leaving after only one term. She’d never be able to thank him enough for giving up his apartment to them.
‘Cuts a very fine figure, I must say,’ murmured Christabel, patting back an imaginary stray hair.
‘If you don’t mind me saying so, there’s nothing like an Englishman,’ retorted Patricia, getting out her powder compact and bright red lipstick. She smiled at her rival, completely unaware that she had left a trace of Elizabeth Arden on her front teeth. ‘We know how to make them in this country, and they, in turn, know the value of a good Englishwoman.’
Brian had left the stage now and it was time for the three wise women to take over.
‘They’re girls!’ hissed Patricia in horror.
‘Shhhhhh,’ said the man in front, turning round and glowering again.
‘Three wise women?’ repeated Christabel. ‘I can see you feel as I do, Patricia. It simply isn’t on. Frankly, I’m thinking of becoming a Buddhist.’ She reached into her terracotta-coloured tapestry knitting bag. ‘I’ve got this wonderful new book about it. You can borrow it if you like.’
Sam sent Nancy a look that said we’d better let them get on with it, and she sent one back to say she agreed. One look at her son’s face proved that none of this mattered if he was happy and, touch wood, on the mend.
Meanwhile, Toby and Giles, dressed as shepherd boys, were walking together across the stage, and there was a collective ‘ahhh’ from the audience. ‘We’re looking for . . .’ began Giles. He stopped.
‘Baby Jesus,’ whispered Jean loudly from the wings.
But Giles was moving away from Toby, giving him a disdainful look. ‘Ugh! He’s farted,’ he announced loudly and the audience cracked up with laughter.
Thankfully there was the interval after that, which might, Nancy hoped, give the two grannies time to compose themselves after the excitement of seeing Brian. Ever since the charity disco, she’d been hearing nothing but that man’s name from both of them. Brian seemed a nice enough man, but a maroon jumper? Bet he had patchy hair under that hat. Yes, she was right! He was coming towards them now without his Father Christmas costume, wearing brown cords, that jumper and a shirt with a collar that had seen better days.
‘Christabel,’ he was saying. He was actually kissing her mother’s hand. ‘And Patricia!’ Now it was Sam’s mother’s turn.
‘May I buy both of you lovely ladies a nice polystyrene cup of coffee?’
Open-mouthed, Sam and Nancy watched him leading the two women towards the back of the hall, where refreshments were being served by adult-sized angels. One of them waved gaily to Nancy and, abandoning her duties, skipped over to them.
‘So lovely to see you!’ Annie bent down next to Danny. ‘And how’s the brave soldier doing?’
Danny eyed her wings distrustfully. ‘I’m not a soldier.’ He pointed to the stage. ‘I was going to be a shepherd.’
Annie clasped her hands together. ‘And you will be, I’m sure. Maybe next year.’
Nancy looked up at Sam, who seemed to know what she was thinking. Since Vietnam and the hospital, they had begun to read each other’s th
oughts.
‘Think I’ll take Danny off to get some juice,’ Sam said. ‘Leave you two girls to have a natter.’
Nancy waited until their son was out of earshot. ‘The thing is, Annie, that we’re going.’
‘Going? Where?’
Nancy felt as thrilled as she had when Sam had come back the other evening and told her about his promotion. ‘Sam’s being moved to Boston. It’s a great package and we’d be crazy to turn it down. Of course, we won’t go until Danny is completely better, but we’re due to make the move by February at the latest. We’ve found a great school for Danny right next to the university, where I’m going to be doing an art course. I’ve never done anything that’s not purely academic before, and I’m really excited about it.’
Annie’s eyes filled with tears. ‘I’ll miss you.’ She moved towards Nancy and gave her a hug. ‘I take it Danny doesn’t know yet?’
Nancy shook her head. ‘I’m worried it’s going to upset him. He won’t want to leave his friends. And then of course there’s the puppy.’
‘What puppy?’
‘Didn’t I tell you?’
Just as she was about to explain, someone tapped her on her back. It was Tracy’s mum, who some time ago she’d mistakenly thought was pregnant. Tracy’s mum had lost a lot of weight, and wore a tight smile on her face to say she knew it.
‘I’m so glad your boy is better.’
‘Thank you.’
The smile faded. ‘However, I think there’s something you ought to know. Something I overheard at Parents’ Evening actually, between Miss Merryfield and your mother-in-law.’
Nancy felt a strange prickle down her spine, just as Patricia herself loomed up behind Tracy’s mum with a grim expression on her face.
‘Excuse me, young woman, but I couldn’t help hearing what you said. Contrary to what some people think, my ears are as sharp as they used to be. And my eyes, too. So if you don’t mind, I’d like a word with you.’