Secrets, Lies & Fireworks (Beautiful Saviors Book 1)

by Pamela L. Todd

  “Don’t forget the outside chalk,” Austin said. “Daddy said we needed more.”

  “Outside chalk?” I asked Marley.

  “You know, that stuff you can draw on the sidewalk with? It washes away, and Austin loves it. He and Blake draw all over the patio and I guess they need more.” Marley consulted the list on her phone. “And it’s on the list.”

  “Cool. Now let’s get this over with. I have a hangover to sleep off this afternoon.”

  Marley laughed. “What did you do last night?”

  “Well, when I finished work I took a nap. Actually, it was more like a coma—I think I slept for almost ten hours—and I woke up surprisingly refreshed. Seth had already gone to Hamilton’s, so I decided to drop in and pay him a visit. Last thing I remember is doing shots upstairs in the club.”

  “Nice.”

  “Do you miss it?” I asked her after a moment. “The partying? The freedom?”

  “Sometimes,” she admitted and grinned at me. “But I’d rather wake up at five a.m. because Austin had to tell me about this crazy dream he had, than feel what you’re feeling right now.”

  “Yeah, I don’t envy me right now.”

  “But it’s not like we’re total hermits. We still go out when we can. And I’m at parties all the time.”

  I nudged her with my elbow. “Organizing them doesn’t count.”

  “When can I come back to your house?” Austin asked, tugging on my hand.

  “Any time you want.”

  His eyes widened. “Today?”

  Marley smothered a laugh. “Yeah, how about today, Aunt Cassie?”

  “Um… Maybe not today, bud.”

  “How about tomorrow?”

  “How about the next? The day before the party?” I countered.

  “Fine,” he grumbled. “But can I sleep over?”

  “As long as it’s cool with your mom.” I looked at Marley. “We can bring him to the party with us?”

  “You mean I could set up without constantly yelling at him to stop eating all the food?” Marley laughed. “Where do I sign up?”

  “Sounds like we have a date, little man.”

  “Sweet.” Austin held up his fist for me to bump it.

  “Sweet,” I agreed.

  * * * *

  Featherlight strokes on my face roused me from sleep. I yawned and snuggled deeper into the cushion, loath to actually wake up. “Get the hell off. I’m sleeping.”

  Seth chuckled and pushed a mass of my thick blonde hair over my shoulder, uncovering my face. “When I left, you were sleeping.”

  “Mmm. I’m not done yet,” I mumbled.

  “Holy shit, did you sleep all day?”

  “No. Wish I had, though. Stupid Marley. Stupid flamingos.”

  “Uh… Am I supposed to know what that means?”

  I finally cracked my eyes open and pushed myself up. Seth sat across from me on the coffee table, elbows on his knees. “Marley and that kid of hers roped me into going shopping for the party.”

  He snorted a laugh. “With that hangover?”

  “How I made it to the end without puking is beyond me.”

  “Have you eaten? I brought food home.” Seth rose and extended a hand to me.

  I took his hand and he pulled me to my feet. “What kind of food?”

  “The kind that comes from Mr. Chow’s.”

  “Nice.”

  After I’d eaten my entire body weight in greasy Chinese food, I felt a million times better. I left Seth in the kitchen to tidy up our things—at his insistence—and sprawled out on the couch.

  “Hair of the dog?” Seth offered me a bottle of beer when he returned a few minutes later.

  I groaned, but accepted the bottle. “This will either cure me or kill me.”

  “Suck it up.” Seth sipped his own drink. Wow, he was sympathetic.

  “Want to watch a movie with me? Or do you have to go back to Hamilton’s?”

  “Not tonight. I’m all yours, gorgeous.”

  A happy smile spread across my lips. There was nothing I liked better than nights just like this—me, Seth, this couch. I kicked my feet up to make room for him and, when he sat, I draped my legs over his lap. Seth’s hand went immediately to my thigh, where he stroked me with his thumb.

  I was so relaxed I could have purred.

  Seth picked up the remote and skimmed through some choices before deciding on an action movie. He peered at me from the corner of his eye.

  “I think I’ve seen this before,” I said, then sipped my beer.

  “Oh yeah?” he mused, a playful smirk pulling at his lips. “When?”

  I shrugged, feigning ignorance. “I forget.”

  Seth took my drink from me and set it along with his on the coffee table. He gripped the backs of my thighs and eased me further down the couch so I lay flat. “Want me to refresh your memory?”

  Whatever glib retort I’d been about to say vanished at the heated look in his eyes. Seth had a voracious sexual appetite and I was always willing to sate his hunger. I’d never had this before, had a man look at me with such raw, animalistic need. My head spun. Seth made me feel worshiped and adored. Like a fucking goddess.

  Seth settled himself between my legs and drifted his hand from my thigh to cup my pussy. “Because what I remember about this movie is getting you off. Through your jeans.”

  “I think you should lose the jeans this time,” I breathed. My pulse rocketed to a frantic tempo, every nerve ending in my body tingling and sensitive.

  “Maybe we should watch the movie and see what we missed the first time.”

  “Jesus, you’re an asshole,” I said, frustration making my words harder than I’d intended. “Fuck the movie.” With that, I clasped the back of his neck and pulled him to me so I could smash our lips together.

  Seth ground his hips into mine and I released a cry. He slid his tongue into my mouth, caressing me, stoking the fire that rose to an inferno.

  I popped the buttons on his jeans and dipped my hand into his boxer briefs. His dick was hot and hard and all mine. I stroked the full length, running my thumb over the tip. Seth shuddered and kissed me so deep I would taste him for days. He thrust into my hand and I squeezed him a fraction harder.

  His cock throbbed and I knew, if I wanted him to, he would come in my hand. I pumped him faster, drunk on the effect I had on him. Seth groaned and broke our kiss. “Cass, you have to stop—I’m going to blow my load all over you.”

  I gave him a slow stroke. “And?”

  He gritted his teeth and squeezed his eyes shut. “Fuck, woman, you’re going to kill me.”

  “Nah. I like having you around too much.”

  Seth clasped my wrist. “Baby, I’m coming inside you.”

  “Who said you’re only coming once?”

  He laughed, a throaty sound that rumbled in his chest.

  A bead of moisture formed on the head of his cock. With my other hand, I caught it on a fingertip. I locked eyes with him as I slowly lifted my finger to my mouth and licked his desire off me.

  “Fuck me,” Seth mumbled.

  I smiled. “I’m trying to.”

  He was on me in a heartbeat. Seth ripped my T-shirt over my head and pulled my bra down to expose my breasts. He palmed one as he slanted his mouth over mine and fucked my mouth.

  I pumped him harder, knowing how close he was to release and not wanting to agonize him. This time, at least. Seth himself wasn’t any better. He loved drawing me to the brink, only to let me hover there and deny me the explosion I craved. Craved like I needed air to breathe.

  Seth’s muscles locked and he panted.

  “Do you want to come on me, Seth?” I whispered. “Come on me—wherever you want.”

  He made a noise low in his throat, almost a growl. Seth thrust into my hand once more, his back and shoulders going rigid. He lifted his body a little and came with a bellow. Seth spurted over my belly, hot and thick.

  He dropped his forehead to mine as he fought to
catch his breath. “Fuck, Cass, I feel fifteen again.”

  I laughed. “I’m not sure if that’s a compliment or not.”

  Seth chuckled. “You do things to me, woman. All sorts of crazy things.”

  “Good.”

  He reached for the box of tissues on the end table and cleaned me up. When he was done, Seth stripped me and shed the rest of his own clothes. I loved having our own place. I loved the freedom and opportunity. The possibility of each and every surface that we took advantage of. A lot. When we’d first gotten together, one of our first clashes had come about when I’d refused to fool around with him in my living room. I’d lived with two other girls, and it had been an unwritten rule to keep all hanky-panky in the bedroom. I loved my friends. I didn’t need to see them get their freak on.

  At the time, we’d had the apartment to ourselves, but I still wouldn’t mess around with him out in the open like that. Stuff had been going on in his head then, stuff that went deeper than I could have imagined.

  But anyway, roommates had quickly become a pain in the ass.

  So now, almost five years later, we hooked up pretty much wherever the hell we wanted. This was our house. No one else was walking through that door.

  This couch had seen some serious action.

  So much so that no one would ever sit on it if they knew.

  “You never stop, Cass,” Seth said in a quiet voice.

  “Never stop what?”

  “Stunning me.” He shook his head. “How the fuck did this happen? How did I land a girl like you?”

  I shrugged. “Blind luck?”

  He laughed before sobering. “I’m being serious as hell right now. I’ll never get used to this. I’m not complacent. I never will be. Every time I see you, you take my fucking breath away. So, you know, that could be a problem when I’m in my nineties. You might kill me. Are you cool with that?”

  “Cool with what? Killing you?” I lifted my eyebrows. “Jesus, Seth, you’re really weird.”

  “And you get it. I’m so fucking lucky, Cass. How did this happen?”

  “Blind luck,” I said again. “That morning in the coffee place when you checked out every other girl but me—”

  Seth frowned. “Hey. You know I would have checked you out if I’d seen you. I wouldn’t have been able to take my damn eyes off you.”

  “—and then tripped over my chair. If you had come in ten minutes later, or if I’d decided not to go for coffee, would we even be here? It was blind luck that we met. That’s not a bad thing.”

  “It’s a fucking miracle is what it is.”

  “I’d say.” I pushed him back and straddled his lap. “And just so you know, I’ve never gotten used to you, either.”

  His eyebrows pulled together. “The good way, right?”

  “Yes.” I dipped my head to press a delicate kiss to his mouth.

  His hands went to my hips, kneading the flesh. “I love you.”

  “I love you, too.” I traced his lips with my fingertip. “I’m not cool with killing you. You can’t leave me. Ever. Okay?”

  “Done.”

  I rocked my hips in a slow, sensual circle. Seth tightened his grip on me, held me more firmly against him. His dick hardened, and all it would take was the right move from me for him to be inside me.

  “I mean it. Never ever.”

  Seth cupped my throat with one hand and drew me closer, pressing his mouth to my neck. “Never ever. Ever. I swear.”

  I drew in a shaky breath and positioned myself over his cock. Seth locked his gaze with mine as I impaled myself on him. Slowly, to draw it out. My eyelids shuttered and I tossed my head back, my spine arching.

  Seth palmed one of my full, heavy breasts, dragging his thumb over my stiffened nipple. “Fuck, these are amazing. Have I ever told you that before?”

  “Only several thousand times,” I breathed.

  He lifted his hips, pushing into me with his delicious length. I loved this. Him inside me. Us joined on both a primal and spiritual level. I’d never connected like this with someone during sex before. It had mostly always just been sex. But with Seth, it was practically sacred.

  Seth didn’t take his eyes off me as I moved, rocking my hips and dragging us into a sexual fog. The world had shrunk to just the two of us. We were an inferno, and each touch, each breathy moan, stoked the flames.

  He groaned as I rocked harder, faster. I was lost. There would be no denying myself, no teasing, no drawing out the inevitable. I cried out his name as my release tore through my body, igniting every cell and scorching my soul.

  Seth ground his teeth and pushed harder into me, matching my movements and chasing his own ending. He wrapped a strong arm around my lower back, driving into me so hard that I had no idea where I ended and he began. We were one being. One heart. One soul.

  He came with such force that I gasped. Seth pressed his forehead to my chest as he fought to catch his breath.

  I draped my arms around his shoulders, my body going languid and boneless.

  “Hey, Seth?” I said a minute or so later when I’d regained the ability to talk.

  “Yeah, babe?”

  “How relieved should we be that this couch can’t talk?”

  “Cass—if it could, I think we’d have traumatized it into silence by now.”

  He was probably right. Oh, what depraved, lustful animals we were.

  Chapter Three

  The day before Marley and Blake’s epic Fourth of July bash, my phone buzzed as I sat eating breakfast, with a Snapchat from Marley. I placed my piece of toast down on the plate, wiped the crumbs from my fingers and slid my finger across the screen.

  The picture was an extreme close-up of Austin’s face, showcasing a lurid green booger in his nose.

  I laughed and turned the phone around to show Seth, who was making coffee.

  He grinned. “Man, that kid is nuts. Do you think they’ve figured out he sends those pictures yet?”

  “I doubt it. He doesn’t save them, so they disappear on their phones too. He’s crafty.” When Marley had first gotten the app, she’d done what all good parents did—she’d taken selfies with her kid using weird-ass filters. Since then, Austin pilfered his parents’ phones at every opportunity to send Seth and me Snapchats.

  And his parents didn’t have a clue.

  The best one had been when he’d snuck into their room in the middle of the night and taken a picture of him between them in their bed. Marley and Blake had both been passed out cold and Austin had been grinning like the maniacal genius that he was.

  “I seriously hope our kids are as cool as him,” Seth said. He turned to pour coffee into my favorite mug, missing what had to be a deer-caught-in-the-headlights look on my face.

  Somehow, in almost five years, we had never had The Talk.

  The kid talk.

  We’d come close when Austin was born. When Marley had been pregnant, my head had been a mess. So many memories, so many what-ifs, had plagued my every thought every minute of every day. Seeing her pregnant, with Blake the doting dad, had really fucked with my head. What would that even feel like? To bloom with pride and not shame? To have a man like Seth stroke my belly, whisper to our unborn baby and simply take care of me?

  I could see it as clearly as if it had already happened. Seth would be a perfect partner and parent. He wouldn’t leave me. He would never leave me.

  But I didn’t know if I could make that journey with him.

  The toast I’d eaten turned to a heavy lump in my belly.

  “Cass?” Seth said as he slid the coffee toward me. “You okay?”

  “Fine,” I said, forcing a smile. “I’m going to shower before our nephew gets here. We’re watching him today, remember?”

  “I remember.” Seth looked at me with a quizzical expression. He didn’t buy what I was selling, not for one second. But I couldn’t help the lie that fell from my lips anyway.

  “I’m fine,” I said again. “I’ll be back in a few.” I rose from
the stool and walked quickly toward the kitchen door.

  Seth caught my wrist, gentle but firm. “No, hold up.” He moved to stand in front of me, concern flooding his eyes. “What’s going on? Is it what I said?”

  The man was far too perceptive. “Of course not.”

  Something a lot like hurt flashed across his face. “Don’t lie to me.”

  I squeezed my eyes shut for a second. “I’m sorry. I’m having a weird reaction to what you said, okay? I just need a few minutes to process.”

  He shook his head. “You’re not having a weird reaction—you’re having a real reaction. And you don’t need to process it by yourself. Talk to me. What is it about what I said that freaked you out?”

  “Kids,” I whispered. “Our kids.”

  Seth frowned. “What about them?”

  Oh God… Was I about to break his heart? What if I couldn’t fix it? What if it ruined us? “What if… What if I don’t want them?”

  He took a step back. “You don’t want kids with me?”

  “No—”

  “Or you don’t want kids, period?”

  I dropped my head and wrapped my arms around myself. “No, I don’t know. But what if I decide that I really don’t want them?”

  “Then we don’t have kids,” Seth said.

  “What?” I snapped my head up to look at him. He didn’t look agonized, like it had killed him to say it. He simply looked like Seth. “But you love kids.”

  “And I’d love to have them.” Seth closed the distance between us again. He cupped my cheeks and tipped my face up to him. “But I love you more.”

  I pulled out of his grasp. “No, I can’t be the person that makes you not have children, Seth. I can’t ruin your life like that.”

  “Cass, Jesus Christ, you’re not—”

  “I’m so sorry, I really am.” A tear slid down my face. “I knew this would hurt you, but I didn’t want to lie.”

  “Cass—”

  “You deserve everything with someone. You deserve someone not fucked up and broken.”

  “Cassidy, would you shut the fuck up?” Seth barked.

  The sudden rise of Seth’s temper took me by surprise. I couldn’t even muster irritation that he’d spoken to me like that.