I think she was a bit taken aback at that rather sudden shift in my attention, but if I hadn’t managed to convince her by then that I was chronically shy, then I was losing my touch. She carefully picked up her laden tray and headed off with it, and I had another mouthful of fruity, melting creaminess, feeling rather pleased with myself. First a testing toe, then a whole foot, and soon, I’d be swimming away merrily.
“… seems terribly shy, so please don’t scare him away. Just stick to the van topic until he feels more comfortable. What?” The whispers dropped further in volume. “Hard to tell under all that camouflage and everything, Lindsay, but yes, unbelievably so.”
I smiled to myself as I scraped up the last mouthful from my plate, resisting the temptation to lick it clean. ‘Not in public Shay, please!’ I gave them a few more minutes to find something else to talk about and settle down a bit and then wandered off to the loo. Coming back, after, I picked up my half-empty glass and my things and approached their booth.
“Hi.” I said hesitantly, “Abby invited me over, if that’s alright? I don’t want to intrude.”
“Don’t be silly, Shay!” she exclaimed. “Paul and Stephen are dying to quiz you about your van.” Emphatic murmurs of agreement as she made Lindsay shuffle back a bit so she could move down herself. I dropped my gear and snagged myself a chair from a nearby table as soon as I saw that happening though.
“No need for anyone to squash up,” I assured them hastily, dropping into the chair. “You all seem so comfortable where you are.” I put my glass on a spare beer mat at my end of the table and Abby sportingly picked up my hastily discarded jacket and hat to put on the bench by her side before giving me another friendly smile.
“Shay, this is Lindsay, that’s Paul, and that’s Stephen. We’re all students from Edinburgh, working on a project up here.”
“And all staying in camper vans while we’re here,” Paul elaborated. “But none of them has much character, except Miguel’s, and even that one isn’t a patch on your little beauty. What year is she?”
“Seventy-three,” I told him with a quick little glance, allowing myself to relax a bit. “I found her at an auction about seven years ago, in the most god-awful state. I don’t think she’d been on the road for about fifteen years before that.” He looked suitably saddened to hear it.
“How much of the original did you manage to salvage?” Stephen asked.
“Well, the engine was a total write-off, but my uncle sorted me out with a new one, a bit of an upgrade, actually. We replaced the gears and electrical systems too. Most of the bodywork was sound. It just needed a few repairs here and there.” I risked a peep up at him and gave him a little nervous smile. “And I didn’t like the side door, so I panelled that section over and put in the rear doors instead. That gave me more room for the fittings inside.” And down again, to watch my hands fiddling with each other in my lap. “The chassis and axles and wheels were all in pretty good condition too, but the whole interior was absolutely rank, all rats’ nests and bugs and foulness. I had to rip the lot out and start again, but that was fine by me. I was happy to work with a clean slate there.”
“I’ll bet! That sounds horrible. And the roof? That didn’t look anything like any of the old standard pop-ups that VW fitted on the different models.”
I stared at the table and, in a rather embarrassed voice, said, “Well, no. I decided to try an idea I had for a new design. It worked out fine.” They were itching to ask me for a nosey around, so I decided to pre-empt them. “I can show you what I’ve managed to do with her after, if you like?” Gosh! I can’t believe I just said that! I picked up my beer and took a nervous swallow, then another one.
“That’d be great! Thanks!” Both lads grinned at me excitedly, and I made what looked like an effort to keep my head up and smile back at them.
“What brings you up this way, Shay?” Abby asked, risking it now that the ice had been nicely broken, and I didn’t look ready to bolt.
“Oh, well, I’ve got a stall booked at the local craft fair this weekend. I piled up quite a bit of new stock over the winter, somehow, and I fancied getting out of Edinburgh for a bit of a break. Thought I’d get up here a couple of days early and have a bit of a holiday.” Then, before she could keep prying, “What about you lot? It’s quite a way to come to work on a student project, isn’t it?”
So they took it in turns to tell me all about their class project, and about Miguel and the Kerrs and how great they all were. And I heard how Abby and Lindsay were old friends of Debbie and Katie, who were Uni pals of Jessica’s, and how it had all come about. They all seemed very enthusiastic about the whole thing.
“We’re so lucky that Mr Kerr offered to let us set up the project there,” Lindsay told me. “You have no idea how hard it is to get the use of suitable land for a proper, purely organic study like ours. It’s quite shocking, really. But even our professors said they didn’t see such clean soil samples very often. The land is amazing.”
They trooped off to the loos in pairs as we were finishing off our drinks, probably one of the main reasons they came here so often at lunchtime, and then we all headed out to see my van.
I got plenty of appreciative oohs and aahs as I showed them the thin, exterior storage spaces I’d made by replacing some of the panelling with matching little hinged doors along the sides. Those were the back compartments of my inside lower cupboards, handier for getting at toolsets and the portable shower and odd bits like that. The rear deck was a hit too, when I pulled it out, and its adjustable legs dropped to the ground. Then I opened the door and let them all troop in with an, “All go on up and sit down if you like,” as I put my outdoor gear back in the closet.
There were some impressed but puzzled looks at the quality and the scarcity of visible features inside until I started popping things open and they began to get an idea of how much I’d managed to pack in there. Sink, stovetop, little built-in oven, fridge freezer, pull out narrow crockery racks, all nicely secured, no chance of breakages, sockets, cupboards; I even swung my office out for them to admire.
“The woodwork in here is just stunning,” Paul told me, looking a bit shell-shocked. “I’ve never seen anything quite like it. Pleased by their reactions, I pressed the little hidden catch set low in the wall that released the table with a quiet click. I pulled it up until the legs locked and they all ran their hands over it wonderingly.
“I didn’t even notice this was there!” Stephen exclaimed. “The floor looked like smoothly fitted planking. You’re a bloody genius at all this stuff, Shay” Paul was eyeing the ceiling with mounting curiosity, so I asked them all to move down to the middle section and sent the table back into the floor before I reached up and turned it on.
“This pulls some power, so I don’t use it much unless a bunch of us are on a camping trip,” I told them. “My solar set up is pretty good, but it does have limits.”
With a quiet humming sound, a trapdoor in the ceiling just behind the front cab slid open sideways, and the upper section of my creation rose up to form the walls and roof of the ‘bedroom.’ I pulled the little steps out and swung them down before inviting them to take turns to climb up and have a look.
“You can sit up in there, no problem, but you have to keep crouched down low when you’re moving about,” I warned them.
“This is brilliant,” I heard Abby exclaim. “Come up and look, Lindsay, there’s plenty of room for two.”
Lindsay disappeared, arse and feet last as she crawled over to the sunken mattress in its double frame. I’d added in a raised bit of floor above the ceiling level up there, so the top of the mattress was flush with that, and that had given me somewhere for running the wiring, and a few hidden extras. It was a thin but extremely comfortable mattress.
“Look, sockets and lights on both sides and what are these things? Oh, they pull up to the height you want, look.” They’d found the swing over tray tables on both sides. “And you can push them away along the side of the b
ed too, for watching videos.”
“This pop-up headboard is a clever touch. I’d never have guessed you could pack so much into a little van like this. That roof was only sticking out a few inches when we were outside. I wonder if he takes on any commission work? Imagine what he could do with a big van like mine, if I was wealthy enough to hire him.” They came back down, eventually, and Paul and Stephen had their turn checking it out.
“This craft fair of yours?” Stephen asked, when they were all standing around again, and I’d closed the roof down. “More woodwork?”
I nodded, opening one of the bench lockers so they could see some of my ‘stock.’ More oohing and aahing. I hadn’t brought any of my favourite pieces along, but there were some nice phone and tablet stands and clamp-on cable sorters and adjustable laptop tables and things like that for the younger people, and various decorative boxes and knick-knacks for the older set. Some toys and puzzle boxes too. Those were fun to make, but I suspected my later designs were getting a bit too hard to solve for most people to enjoy them.
“It’s just a hobby really, but it gives me an excuse to take a break from work when I fancy one,” I told them, when I thought they were overdoing the admiration a bit.
“This isn’t your main job?” Abby looked surprised.
I shrugged. “No, I need to be in the right mood for it, and sometimes I’m just not. I’m a freelance translator, that’s where I make the bulk of my income.”
“Which languages?” she asked, curious. I shrugged.
“I get quite a variety of different things these days,” I said, deliberately missing the point and being vague. But I had a brand new ‘long-established’ website with lots of samples of my work and some great reviews from satisfied clients. “Here.” I opened a cupboard in the office section and pulled out a business card to hand her. “That’s my website if you want to have a look sometime.” And if anyone phoned that number, they’d get an answering service, currently primed with an ‘out of office’ response.
“Where are you staying while you’re up here, Shay?” Stephen asked, as I went back to where everyone was putting my items carefully away again. “Parking at a friend’s or something?” I shook my head.
“No, I don’t want to stay in town, or get caught up in late nights out or any of the usual nonsense that always involves. I was checking out good local spots over my lunch, here…” I fished out my phone and pulled the map up again. “I was thinking one of these two lay-bys, they look like good places. What do you think? You know the area.” He frowned.
“Normally I’d say those were both good choices, but I don’t think you want to be so isolated, not just now. You see, a local farmer was murdered only a few miles from here on Tuesday, and the police haven’t caught the killer yet. Could be some psycho on the loose out there…” I was in a good position to sit down on the bench behind me abruptly, looking rather shocked. I put my head down and pulled my glasses off to rub at my eyes. Then I pushed at my hair and stared up at them all nervously.
“Seriously? Because if you’re pulling my leg that isn’t funny.” My gaze flicked from face to face questioningly but they all looked suitably aghast at the idea of it being a joke, or at something anyway. There are a lot of drawbacks to looking like I do, but sometimes it could be a very useful tool, and I wouldn’t hesitate to utilise it whenever that was the case. After a brief, shocked silence everyone turned to look at Abby with appalled, ‘We can’t let him go off on his own! Just look at him!’ expressions on their faces.
Poor, defenceless little me, I was quite touched.
“I’ll be back in a minute,” she said and went out to make a phone call. Jessica Kerr must have taken a bit of convincing, because Abby was out there for a good fifteen minutes while the rest of them worked hard to keep me occupied with idle chatter. Then, after she came back, I let them all talk me into following their car to the camp, because of course, everyone would love to have me stay with them, and they were all really nice and friendly, and it was my best option, honestly. They wouldn’t be able to sleep if I said no, etc. etc.
I’d tested the water and had a bit of a paddle. Now it was time to dive in properly. How else could I get close to the Kerrs quickly?
Fifteen
We sat down to lunch with Douglas and Jessica Kerr, promptly on time and newly freshened up. Back at the kitchen door, Martha had shown us where we could scrape our boots clean and then taken our coats, before directing us to two adjoining restrooms to wash and tidy ourselves up. Mine was nice, in a dated but well-kept way, and I’d been happy for the chance to make myself look a bit more presentable. My hair wasn’t in the mood to behave though, not after contrary winds had been playing with it on and off all morning. I did what I could with the tangled bird’s nest on my head, but it was no good. It still looked like I’d just got out of bed after an especially restless night. When I met up with Caitlin again, she looked immaculate, not a hair out of place; it was all very well for some people.
We met Douglas and Jessica Kerr heading for the dining room from the other direction, so we all walked in together and took our places; Douglas and I facing each other on the window side, with Caitlin on my left and Jessica on his right. With its wings folded down, the table did not feel uncomfortably large for the four of us, and it had been laid with tasteful, meticulous care over an embroidered white cloth and a longer hanging under cloth beneath. In deference to our ‘on duty’ status, glasses of chilled water sat by each place setting, with frosted, cut glass carafes for refills placed within easy reach of each pair of facing diners.
“I gather you’ve already popped in at the cottage, Inspector?” Douglas opened the conversation as he shook out his serviette. “I hope everything was satisfactory in there?”
“Very much so, thank you,” I answered, sliding my own rolled cloth from its ring. “Your factor made sure my people were well looked after.” When had I last spread a white, linen serviette over my lap? Granny O’Brien’s again? No, much later than that, the formal graduation dinner at St. Andrews. But that had been a one-off event and entering this house was still like walking into odd little fragments of my childhood.
Martha came in, wheeling a little catering trolley bearing a silvered soup tureen, and went around the table clockwise, starting with Caitlin, serving modest helpings of a clear, vegetable consommé into the wide, shallow dishes sitting on our dinner plates.
“Lovely.” Douglas beamed at her delightedly. “Martha only uses vegetables from our kitchen garden Inspector. I do hope you and Sergeant Murray enjoy it.” Martha, I noticed, served me an extra little ladleful.
“Thank you,” I murmured politely. She resisted the urge to pat me on the head and trundled off again. The clear, golden soup was piping hot, as it should be, and absolutely delicious. Remembering my manners, I scooped it up by gently pushing my spoon away from me before lifting it, making sure I kept the straight posture granny had always insisted upon. Douglas smiled round at us all benevolently, and I resisted the urge to start asking Jessica any questions, focusing instead on unhurriedly emptying my bowl. Business talk was for after the main course; anything else just wasn’t civilised.
“You are not local to these parts, Inspector?” Douglas stated more than asked, making polite conversation. “Have you been in Inverness for long?”
“Not quite two years yet, Sir, although I had visited the county before, several times.”
“Ah, yes, I thought there was more of East Lothian in your accent. You have a very pleasant voice if you don’t mind me mentioning it. You must know Dunbar quite well, and Haddington, of course.” I belatedly remembered him expressing his disappointment that none of Jessica’s young friends were linguists. Like my cousin, he was one of those people with a good ear for such distinctions.
“I do,” I admitted. “Actually, I have a little place down there, just a few miles inland from Dunbar, but it’s been rented out since I moved up here.”
“Quite right, quite right.” Douglas
nodded approvingly. “It doesn’t do to leave a house empty for so long. One has to catch any signs of damage good and early, to avoid much larger repairs being required later.”
We continued to consume our soup in a leisurely fashion. I glanced at Caitlin, who seemed perfectly happy to be left out of the chit chat, thank you, and Jessica seemed so immersed in her own thoughts that I didn’t expect any help from there. Which was all very well, but a good guest was supposed to make some effort to keep a little polite conversation going.
“And have you always lived here yourself, Mr Kerr?” An innocuous enough question. “Your estate is very lovely.” I looked at him with polite interest, spoon in mid-transit.
“Thank you. I believe it is. Yes, I grew up in this house and have spent most of my life here.” His spoon dipped and rose again before he continued, “I was away for a good while, at Oxford, long ago, first studying and then teaching, once I’d obtained my doctorate.” Another mouthful. “But then the responsibility for this place fell on my shoulders, and I came home permanently.” He didn’t sound in the least regretful of giving up his professorship. “Still, I’ve always been able to get away quite regularly, when I’ve felt the urge to. My factor deals with most of the day to day running of things for me.” He finished with his soup and laid his spoon down. “And of course, I’ve had the leisure to continue to pursue my studies, publish my papers and so on. Some of my old colleagues still visit, and I go down to see them occasionally too.”
Some sixth sense of Martha’s must have told her that we were now done with our soup, because she came trundling back and began to collect the used dishes up.
“That was delicious, thank you,” I told her as she scooped up my empty dish.
“Really delicious,” Caitlin echoed dutifully. We were both rewarded with pleased little smiles before Martha turned to stack the used tableware on the lower shelf of her trolley.
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