by Cynthia Eden
Gone.
She was gone, and his beast was dead silent. Not raging for him to go after her. Not snarling to be let loose from his cage. The beast was grieving. Hurting too much to make a sound. “It’s my own fucking fault.” His hand fisted against that window pane. “I lied to her. I tricked her. I should have told her the truth from day one. The minute I saw her, I should have told her what I was. Why I was there. I should have let her know that I was hers. That everything was different. That I would change the world just for her, that I would—”
“Shit, man, save the drama. Lauren didn’t leave because she was angry at you.”
What? Carter spun to confront a grim-faced Griffin. “Then why did she leave?” I should have fallen at her feet, I should have—
I should have been a better man.
But being a good man was an impossible task for a monster.
“There’s so much we don’t know about the vamps.” Griffin blew out a hard breath as he raked a hand through his hair. “Isabella doesn’t exactly keep close company with her own kind, and she’s never transformed a human. Most born vamps are male, you know that, and having a born female like Isabella was a rare thing. Then to meet someone like Lauren, a human who’d been transformed into a vamp and who was a werewolf’s mate—”
Carter growled. “Get to the point.” The sun’s up. Lauren had better be someplace safe. If her skin gets so much as blistered…
“Lauren told Isabella that Antoine—he said she’d go back to being human.”
“Bullshit.” An immediate response. “He lied, he—”
“If a month passed since her transformation and she didn’t take a life, then she would become human again. Antoine was the oldest vamp that Isabella knows of, and she said he would hold the most knowledge about her kind.”
“That doesn’t mean he was telling the truth.”
“No, but we can’t be certain yet that he was lying.”
Yet. Carter’s whole body seemed to have shut down. “She wanted to be human again.” She’d first contacted the Dealer because she wanted her human life back. “Lauren wanted to be normal.” Pain twisted like a knife in his chest—or a damn stake in his heart—but he understood. “So that’s why she left me.” His hands fisted. His claws cut into his palms. “Being with a werewolf isn’t normal.”
“Damn, Carter, would you stop the conclusion jumping bullshit already? I don’t have time for that crap. She left because a werewolf can’t mate with a human. You know that, you’re just grieving your ass off over there and you’re not thinking clearly.” Griffin stalked closer. “Take a moment and consider your buddy Riley. We both know he’s been mooning over his lady for years.”
Carter’s brows rose. “How the hell do you know about that? You just met the guy!”
“Did I?” Griffin murmured as he raised his brows. “Don’t be so sure.” He flashed a grim smile. “I’ve got secrets, too.”
Fuck. “You sent Riley to keep an eye on me.”
Griffin shrugged.
“You knew…you knew I was hunting vamps. You sent Riley—”
“I wanted to make sure you were alright. After all, you’re pack.”
He was pack, and he’d been played.
But Griffin wasn’t done. “Riley has kept his distance because he didn’t think that his Heather could be a wolf’s mate. He never gave her the bite. But I did some research, and I learned that other wolves didn’t hold back the way he did. They tried to make humans their mates, and the results were damn disastrous. The beast overwhelmed them. The wolves wound up hurting the women they loved the most.”
“I can’t hurt Lauren. I won’t.”
“And she didn’t want to hurt you. Lauren said she had to leave while she could, while she was still strong enough. She left because it was right for you both.”
“No, no, it’s not, there has to be a way, there has to be—”
“Did Lauren want to be a vampire?”
Carter had to swallow the lump in his throat. “You know she didn’t. Antoine forced that choice on her.”
“So now she has the chance to get her life back. Only to be human, you need to stay away from her. A human can’t have a werewolf at her side. And a werewolf, he can’t stay controlled around a human mate. If she goes back to being human…”
Then we can’t be together.
If possible, his beast seemed to become even quieter inside of him. The wolf was still. Grieving. Lost. “What if Antoine was lying? What if she stays a vamp?”
“Then she said she’d be back.” Griffin didn’t appear overly hopeful. Or hopeful at all. “But if she changes, then, man, I’m sorry, but Lauren doesn’t want you to find her. She doesn’t want you to hunt her.”
She doesn’t want you to find her. His chest burned. “Can mates be separated?” He knew of horror stories, of insanity, of—Carter stopped the thought. “No.” His voice was flat. “If she wants a normal life, I’ll give it to her.” Hadn’t he promised to give her anything?
Everything?
No matter what price he had to pay, he’d do it. He’d give his sanity or his life for her any day.
“I thought you’d say that.” Griffin hesitated. “I’m sorry. I don’t—I don’t know what’s going to happen to you. You had her blood and with the way vamp blood impacts our kind—”
“Don’t worry. I’ll handle it.”
Griffin didn’t look convinced. Probably because he knew Carter was speaking total bullshit once again. But he would find a way. “She cured my addiction. I don’t crave vamp blood.”
“No, you just crave her.” Sympathy shone in Griffin’s eyes. “Again, I’m sorry.” Griffin turned away.
“Can I change?” The words burst from Carter.
Griffin stiffened. His spine went hard and straight. “What?” His head turned back toward Carter.
“If a werewolf and human can’t mate, is there a way for me to change?” Damn but he wished the Dealer were still alive. He was more than willing to make a deal with her.
“You want to give up your werewolf? That’s like giving up part of your soul!” Horror was on Griffin’s face and echoing in his voice.
“No, Lauren is part of my soul.” His wolf was still silent, as if he…he agreed with Carter’s choice. “There was this woman in Savannah. The Dealer—she was a witch. She, um, died, but if we can find someone else like her, then maybe I can become—”
The door creaked open. “Human?” Isabella stood in the doorway. She’d obviously heard everything. Carter had known she was there, though, and he hadn’t cared about her overhearing. He’d figured she was hanging close in case he went crazy and attacked Griffin in his grief. I didn’t, though, I’m holding it together. For the moment.
Isabella’s lips curled down. “I knew the Dealer. Her real name was Natalie Kingston, and, once upon a time, she was Antoine’s lover. He hurt her—as he hurt so many—tortured her, and Natalie used magic to prolong her life so that she could get vengeance on him.” She licked her lips. “She was my friend once. And once, she was kind.” Isabella notched up her chin. “But fury ate away at her, and she changed.” Her shoulders hunched. “She’s dead? Truly?”
“Yeah.” He didn’t tell Isabella about how her friend had attacked him and Lauren. Hardly the time—she looked pained enough. But maybe… “Do you know another witch? Someone who can take away my wolf?”
He’d do it, for Lauren.
He’d do anything.
“Calm the hell down,” Griffin snapped at him. “We don’t even know if she’s going to become human again yet.”
If she does, then my changing will be the only way we can be together.
“There isn’t a way to lose your wolf,” a growling voice announced.
Carter wasn’t particularly surprised to see that Riley had joined the party. The guy stood behind Isabella, looking as grim as the rest of them.
“Do you really think,” Riley asked him, his voice still little more than a rough growl, “that I
haven’t gone to witches? That I didn’t approach the Dealer herself, wanting to change? Wanting there to be a way for me to be with Heather? Every answer I got was the same. You can’t lose your wolf and live. It’s not possible.”
But he was supposed to lose his mate and live?
“You said before…” Isabella’s voice was halting. “When I asked who killed Antoine, you said—”
“We both did it.”
She nodded. “Maybe that will be enough.” Her words came fast, cracking with hope. “Maybe the fact that she worked with you—you killed Antoine together. Maybe that will be enough to keep her as a vamp.”
Was he supposed to hope for that? Wish? Pray? Hope that Lauren stayed a vampire? When he knew—he knew—she wanted to be human?
Just how much of a selfish bastard was he?
Carter shook his head.
***
The sun was rising, and it was weird, it was wrong, but Lauren returned to the one place that had been her home.
She went back to the casino. Back to the spot where she’d once danced on stage. Back to the spot where all her dreams had seemed so perfect. Back to that spot.
She stood on the stage. No lights shone on the wood. Not this time. And there were no windows in the theater, no sunlight slipped in, but she could still feel weakness creeping through her body. There was no sign of Antoine’s blood on the floor. No remains at all. Griffin’s team had cleaned the building. They’d searched and rounded up any remaining vamps. Dealt with them.
Now the place was just empty. Echoing.
Cavernous.
She slipped behind the curtains of the stage, and she made her way back to the dressing rooms. Lauren found the room that had once been hers. Her hand lifted and brushed across the wood of that door. There was a little star there, and how proud she’d been of that star. How proud she’d been of everything.
Lauren opened the door. The room—it was just as she’d left it, and the sight of her couch, her make-up, her dressing mirror—it caused a pang to shoot through her. Had Antoine ordered everything to stay the same? Part of his big plan?
She’d shot that plan to hell. She’d sent him to hell. Would he count as the kill she’d been supposed to make? Lauren didn’t think so…it just seemed…well, if she was to stay a vamp, then she would need to drain someone, right? That should be the way it worked. Using a stake didn’t exactly seem like it would fit with the whole vamp transformation bit, but what did she know?
She was just a junior vamp, a lost soul…a woman who felt as if she were losing her very soul.
Lauren sat in front of her mirror. There were no windows in her dressing room, either. No lights on, but she could see easily. She stared at her reflection. Only Lauren didn’t see herself. She saw him. Her werewolf. “I miss you, Carter. I miss you so—”
“You can see him in hell.”
The words were low and snarling. Lauren’s eyes widened in shock as she caught sight of the woman who’d burst from the shadows. A woman whose body had been badly burned, who had a throat that looked red and raw, but was…healing? The woman rushed toward Lauren with a wooden stake gripped in her hands. Even though it had been ravaged by fire, Lauren recognized the other woman’s face. Her eyes. Her pain.
The Dealer.
“The one he loved doesn’t get to live!” the Dealer screamed. “Antoine’s favorite bitch dies!”
What? Lauren jumped to her feet. Weakness from the sun consumed her, dragging at her muscles, but she fought the Dealer. They collided and fell to the floor. The stake rolled away from the Dealer’s hands.
Lauren slammed her forehead into the Dealer’s face. “Stop it! I’m not your enemy!”
“You’re his! That means you die!” And the witch had a knife. She’d yanked it from her boot. She drove the knife into Lauren, stabbing her over and over. “I’ll drain you! You’ll bleed out and die! You’ll—”
Lauren bit her. There was no choice. Her fangs sank into the Dealer’s throat even as the other woman kept stabbing her. Lauren knew she had to drink enough so that the Dealer would stop hurting her. So that the other woman would just stop.
The rising sun spread weakness through Lauren’s body.
Or is that weakness coming from the blood loss?
The Dealer wasn’t stopping. And neither…was Lauren.
I won’t die. I’ll see you in hell first.
She kept drinking the Dealer’s blood.
Chapter Fifteen
Vampire And Werewolf Rules To Live (Or Die) By…
Final rule: Screw the rules. They were made to be broken, anyway.
Lauren’s eyes opened. She sucked in a deep breath. Her heart beat steadily. Her skin was warm. She felt…strong. Energized. And…
Something was on top of her. Someone was on top of her. A woman with long, tangled hair.
The Dealer.
Horror rushed through Lauren. She shoved at the woman, and the Dealer’s limp body slid off her. The witch…she wasn’t moving at all. Lauren put her hand to the Dealer’s throat. No pulse. She’s so cold.
Lauren crouched beside the body. The other woman had been attacking her. Lauren’s blood had been soaking her clothes as the knife sank in her. She was still covered in blood.
The witch had been trying to kill her, so Lauren had bit the Dealer. She’d sunk her teeth into the other woman, and she’d taken the witch’s blood. She’d kept drinking until the Dealer had dropped the knife.
And then…
Then the sun was up. And I don’t remember what happened.
Lauren’s trembling fingers rose to her mouth.
I killed her. She’d taken a life, and there was no going back. “I’m so sorry,” Lauren said. Then she gave a wild yell as emotion surged through her. I didn’t want to kill you! “Shit, why did you attack me? Why? I never did any damn thing to you! I never hurt you! I never—”
The Dealer’s eyes flew open.
“Holy shit,” Lauren breathed.
The Dealer stared at her in absolute shock. “What did you do to me?”
Lauren slid her tongue over the edge of her razor-sharp fangs. “What did we do to each other?”
***
The werewolf stronghold stood behind the gate, towering and dark. Guards were near the entrance—big, strong wolves who waited just inside the gate. They were in animal form, and judging by the tenseness of their bodies…
“They know we’re here,” Lauren whispered.
The Dealer grunted. “And why are we here? Because coming to visit a pack of wolves is not a good plan for two vamps.”
“Seriously, stop it.” They’d had this same argument before. Multiple times that night. “We’re going in.” She turned to glare at the Dealer—well, Natalie Kingston. The woman’s throat had healed from Lauren’s bite. She’d actually healed from more than just the bite—all of her burns were gone, too. Her skin was flawless and her eyes gleamed. “Don’t make me kill you.”
“Again?” Natalie snapped back. “You mean don’t make you kill me again?”
Natalie’s voice had been anything but quiet, and the wolves near the gate had heard them—even though the women were huddled a good fifty feet away. The wolves surged over the gate and bounded toward them.
“Oh, hell,” Lauren breathed.
“And I have zero magic at my disposal,” Natalie said as she grabbed Lauren’s arm. “Thanks to you. So let’s get out of here before they rip us apart.”
No, she wasn’t leaving. Not until she saw Carter. Not until—
“Lauren!” The roar had come from behind the gate. And at that booming cry, the charging wolves froze.
Lauren took a deep breath. She slipped from her hiding spot even as Natalie cursed. Ignoring the other woman, Lauren began walking toward the werewolf stronghold. Toward Carter. Toward the man who was her mate.
There is no going back now.
Her steps were certain as she headed toward him, and she was aware that Natalie was creeping behind her. She didn’t
look back, though.
Carter shoved open the gate. He ran to her and yanked her into his arms. He was warm and strong and solid against her—he was everything that she’d wanted. He was the man she’d been afraid she’d never have.
“You’re here. You’re fucking here.” His arms were steel bands around her body, so tight that she could barely breathe, and Lauren didn’t care. “You left…oh, shit, baby, don’t ever leave me again. We’ll make it work. I’ll find a way. I can find a witch, I can find someone to take away my wolf—”
“Uh, no,” Natalie spoke from behind Lauren, her voice sharp. “That doesn’t happen. You don’t just wish away your werewolf. You do that, buddy, and you die.”
He stiffened against Lauren. Then, slowly, his head raised. He stared over her shoulder. “You’re dead, Dealer.”
Lauren didn’t look away from him. His jaw was so strong. His eyes so beautiful. His body so warm.
“I am dead, thanks to your um, baby, there.” Natalie was definitely disgruntled. So what?
If you don’t like the consequences, then maybe you shouldn’t have hunted me down and attacked me. Attack a vamp and you get bit.
“No.” Carter shook his head. “You died in Georgia. Your throat—the fire—”
“I worked a spell, okay?” Her footsteps shuffled closer. “I would live…as long as Antoine did. So, yes, I survived that nightmare at the motel. I wasn’t about to leave this world and let that bastard still be here. You have no idea what he did to me. I wasn’t going to stop until he was gone.”
“Yeah, well, Lauren and I took care of that shit,” Carter threw at her. “You’re welcome.”
Silence. Carter was still glaring at the woman, obviously suspicious of her.
Lauren understood, she really did.
“The spell ate away at my mind.” Now Natalie sounded quiet. Subdued. Regretful. “I…lost myself, okay? That’s what happens when you use dark magic. It takes you over. In order to extend my life, I had to dip into some very, very dark magic. And I couldn’t see past my rage and fury. That was all I knew. It was why…why I attacked Lauren last night.”