So, she could do her job.
And he could suffer in his.
* * * B l a c k h a w k - W h i t e f o x * * *
Across DC
Harmony Wells’
Home
Harmony was emotionally and physically drained. Today made her so exhausted.
The truth had set her free, but it also sucked everything she had out of her. Coming home from the Hoover Building, she parked in her garage, headed upstairs, and took a long, hot shower.
In there, she thought about it all.
The hardest part about pulling the scab off a raw wound was that as she stood there, in the water, she saw the rape in her mind.
She felt it all over again.
She lived it over.
The whole thing had stripped her bare and made her empty and raw.
This was hard for her.
In her life, there were a few constants.
She would be one of the boys, she was badass and tough, and she kept that incident close to her vest in shame. Now it was out, and while she felt better at first, at home, alone, and scared, she only wanted to escape it.
Where would she run?
Where would she be safe enough?
Nowhere.
So, she struggled. Maybe coming home had been a bad idea. Maybe she should have gone to the firing range, shot off some rounds, and went to the office.
Being alone…sucked.
That was why she rarely spent time here but to sleep and shower. It reminded her of her past, and how after she’d been violated, she came home to the silence.
The degradation.
The horror.
After that day, nothing had ever been right for her. She’d lost everything, and she’d run.
She was a coward.
Now she would live it all over again.
Heading into her kitchen, she put on a pot of coffee, and stared at the drip as it brewed.
With each one, she wept.
That old wound festered.
At that moment, she wanted to curl up into a ball and weep over the whole thing.
“I can do this,” she whispered, battling for control of her life. “I can survive anything.”
She had no choice.
There was, again, no one to save her.
He pulled into her driveway and recalled their first date. It had been a disaster, and he wished he knew then what he knew now. If he had, it would have been different.
Now, he wasn’t thinking about being nervous around her, he was thinking about protecting her.
There was something about Harmony that touched his soul. He could feel it when he was near her.
She made him happy.
Yes, they’d only had one shitty date, but when he was near her, there was that awe.
She was amazing, and now he wished he could wrap himself around her to make her feel safe.
It was so hard to know what she wanted him to do for her. Harmony was a tough nut to crack.
After their date, he felt a million times worse. He’d brought up sex, and here she was, a survivor of rape.
Max felt like an idiot.
No, worse.
Max felt like an asshole.
The whole time that he’d been struggling with his issues, and she’d been kind enough to try to talk him down. The entire time, she was carrying this.
Max couldn’t imagine.
Well, she needed someone, and he’d love to be that person. Harmony was a good person. He could tell when he listened to her, watched her, and was near her.
She was kind.
She was funny.
She was patient.
And she was wounded.
He’d been there, so he understood. His father had been taken from him, and for years, he was angry. Now, he was healing with the help of the people he surrounded himself with. Now, he was stronger, and he wanted to help her too.
Max would.
Anyway he could.
Getting out of his car, he headed toward the door and knocked.
With the slightest of movements, Max saw the curtain move, and then the unlatching of a lock as she opened the door. She was in a robe and her eyes and nose were red.
Jesus.
His heart broke for her. In that moment, he wanted to bundle her up, hold her, and promise everything would be okay. In that moment, he wanted to protect her with all he had.
“Hey,” Max said, trying not to be nervous.
“Hey.”
“I thought you might want some company,” he said. “I brought provisions.”
The last person she wanted to see was this man. He tripped her up and confused the hell out of her. Today, he was kind and gentle, and she didn’t deserve it. She was a coward, and she didn’t deserve his sweetness.
“I really don’t.”
He had that jittery feeling. The one that told him he was about to screw this up.
“Oh. Okay, then I’ll leave these with you. You can have these,” he said, pulling pink flowers from behind his back.
Harmony stared at them.
This was why she didn’t want to see him. He was being sweet and gentle. Her life was shitty, and she had no business being near him.
Men left.
They broke your heart.
They destroyed you.
“Why are you doing this?” she asked, still not taking the flowers from him.
Max was confused.
“There’s no ulterior motive, Harmony. I just picked them up for you since you’re upset.”
She stared at the flowers.
“I wanted to cheer you up.”
She didn’t understand this man. She was so attracted to him, and those deep, warm brown eyes turned her upside down.
Max wasn’t done.
“I also got you ice cream, cookies, some candy, and tissues.”
“Are you trying to fatten me up?” she asked, struggling to be anything but a bitch.
He stopped talking. Instead of getting upset, he figured it was time to go. Gently, he placed the bag and flowers like an offering at her feet.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean anything by it. I was just trying to be a friend when you needed someone.”
She didn’t say a word.
Max figured he’d screwed-up. Getting the hint, he backed up. Clearly, she didn’t want him there. He was a glutton for punishment. He genuinely liked her, and she was still pissed at their date and this.
He understood.
“You have my number. If you need me, call. I’m here to talk,” he said, backing down the steps, and then turning to head for his car.
She watched him leave.
At his car, he got in, but before he started it, he rested his head on the steering wheel. After a few seconds, he turned it on and drove off.
Harmony picked up the bag and brought it in. She pulled everything out of it, and there was her favorite ice cream. She’d mentioned it on their date. Cookies that she said were her addiction, and licorice. Again, something she told him she loved.
Then there were the pink flowers.
Harmony felt bad.
He’d been trying to connect with her on some level, and she’d been bitchy.
It wasn’t his fault.
It was hers.
Picking up her phone, she did the right thing.
‘Can you come back? I’m sorry. Thank you for the things. I appreciate it. I really do.’
He didn’t reply.
Harmony stared at the things, and she started crying. That wave just hit her, and since she was alone, she chose to mourn. As she opened the tissues, there was a knock on her door.
She headed toward it.
He was back.
When she opened the door, she didn’t hesitate. She rushed at him and into his arms.
“I have you,” he said, holding her. “It’s okay, Harmony. I’m here.”
She sobbed.
The simple touch of someone who wouldn’t hurt her, and she could trust, helped ease the p
ain. Max was a good man. She could tell.
After all, he came back.
As they stood there, him holding her, Harmony realized that she needed someone.
“Thank you for coming back.”
Oh, the pleasure was his.
Noticing that her neighbors were staring, he scooped her up and carried her into her house. With his heel, he kicked the door closed and carried her to the couch.
Once there, he sat and just held her.
What else could he do?
Max didn’t know how to make the pain stop, but that he just wanted to do it for her. The whole time as she was sobbing, it was clear that she was damaged, and his first instinct was to soothe her.
“I have you, Harmony. It’s okay. I’m here. I’ll keep you safe.”
She cried even more at his words.
God!
For the last six years, she’d been waiting for someone to see through this façade and say that to her.
Of course it would be Max.
“Shhhh, honey, I have you,” he said as she wept.
Harmony believed him.
The entire time, he held onto her. She breathed in the scent of his cologne, and it was calming. It helped her focus, regroup, and slow the wave of pain.
When she was finally out of tears, he handed her some tissues.
“Thank you,” she said.
“No need to thank me. I know what will make you feel better,” he said.
She looked up at him.
“What?”
He grabbed the package of cookies and opened it. Then he held one out for her.
“Cookie?” he asked.
She took it and ate it. He handed her a second and then ate one himself as she stayed on his lap.
“I don’t know what to do with you,” she said out of the blue, surprising him.
He lifted a brow.
“Uh, what’s that mean?”
“You’re frustrating, sweet, confusing, kind, and…”
And she liked him.
A lot.
For the first time, in a while, Harmony felt safe. Having Max there…it was nice.
He didn’t expect her to finish her sentence. In fact, he was afraid that she would. Instead, he tried to help her even more.
“Spoons?” he asked, holding the ice cream in his free hand. “Want some?”
She did.
“They are in the drawer next to the dishwasher.”
Sliding her off of his lap, he gave her a kiss on the cheek and then headed in to get them. When he returned, he’d made her a cup of coffee. “We have the basic food groups,” he said. “We have sugar, sugar, coffee, and sugar.”
She laughed.
His heart skipped.
She was gorgeous when she smiled.
Hell!
She was gorgeous when she cried. It was that tipped up nose, the lavender eyes, and that hair. It was so blonde and silky. He wanted to spend hours touching it.
“When we are in a sugar coma later, don’t blame me. You picked it out.”
“I can go get you something…”
“Max, stop. You’re over thinking. You went with your gut, and it was perfect. This is perfect,” she said, taking her coffee from him, and a spoon.
He joined her.
Here was where he knew it would make-or-break them. Now that she was done crying, there was only one thing to do.
“Want to talk about it?” he asked.
“I feel stupid.”
“About?” he asked. “What happened today or that you’re in a kitty cat bathrobe?”
She looked down and laughed.
“Well, now it’s both.”
He grinned.
“I think you look sexy in it. Meow for me,” he teased, sensing she was past the crying.
She snorted.
“Oh, Maximus.”
He loved making her laugh.
“Anyway, finish what you were saying,” he stated, spooning up some ice cream and feeding it to her.
“I ran like a coward. I left my job and hid. That rubs me the wrong way. The rape…it was horrible. I’m still not over it, clearly, but the chicken shit escape…I’m embarrassed for myself. I should have kicked his ass.”
“Well, by talking about it, you are. When I was in therapy, it helped. Maybe you should see someone?”
“You were in therapy?” she asked, eating some more ice cream he was feeding to her.
“Yeah, when my dad died. I grew up not knowing about him. I was always told he was simply not around. I never had a dad to take me to the park, I never had him on Christmas—well, not for the first ten years.”
“And?” she asked, feeding him a piece of licorice.
“Then he was back. I was so happy. I got the only thing I ever wanted in life. I had my dad.”
He pulled out his wallet and showed her the picture of him. He was smiling and hugging his son. It was worn, and clearly, it had been something he’d had in his possession for years.
“What happened to him, if you don’t mind me asking?”
He didn’t.
“He was killed. He and Elizabeth went through a door together in her early years. A mob guy was waiting and shot him. He died instantly.”
“I’m sorry.”
He didn’t doubt that.
“I was so angry at me. I was angry that I lost him. I was angry that I didn’t have him. I wasn’t angry at the person who took him. I was angry at Elizabeth for surviving.”
She listened.
“I learned something from the therapy.”
What?” she asked, hanging on his every word.
“Be angry at the man who violated you and stop hating that ‘you’ feel like you didn’t stop it. He took your choice, Harmony, and that is on him—not you. You are only a victim if you live in that moment and give him that power. Look for your happy.”
She stared at him.
“Uh, are you okay?” he asked.
No.
No, she wasn’t.
His words caused something in her. It was that lightbulb moment.
She got it, and not only that, she saw him in a whole new light. Harmony wanted to find that happy.
Maximus Chase was…he was perfect.
“Yeah, I’m okay,” she said when she wasn’t. She was focused on him.
He was wearing a suit, his gun was peeking out along with his badge, and she found him the sweetest, sexiest man she’d ever seen.
“You’re angry at yourself, Harmony, and you didn’t do anything. Be angry at the asshole who hurt you. If you’d like, I’ll go kick his dead body around the morgue.”
She laughed.
“Well, that’s sexy.”
He grinned.
“Ehhhh, we have to do what we can to get through the day, right?”
Yeah, he was right.
Max handed her a cookie, and she stared at it. “Did I cross a line?” he asked. “I didn’t mean to get too personal.”
She watched him.
“No, I needed this. Thank you,” she said, feeling a million times better. He was right. She was carrying the blame, and she didn’t do anything. It was why she never filed a report, or let the blame lay where it belonged.
He was so right.
“I have something for you now,” she said.
“What?” he asked, hoping it was a kiss. He wanted nothing more than to see what it would be like.
She took some ice cream and put it between two cookies. Then she made him an ice cream cookie sandwich.
“And that’s the best thing anyone could give me,” he said, smiling at her.
“That’s for after.”
“After what?” he asked.
Harmony leaned in and kissed him. Her mouth found his, and she slid her hand into the back of his hair, kissing him.
It caught him off guard at first, and then it rocked his world.
She tasted like chocolate ice cream, and all of the things he’d only dreamt about. Max let her keep kissing hi
m. He didn’t stop her.
He couldn’t.
This was Heaven.
Then, after a few minutes, he realized that she might not want this.
Regretfully, he pulled away.
“I’m sorry.”
She stared into his eyes.
“For?”
“You’re upset, and this…”
She ran her fingers over his scruffy cheek.
“This healed me.”
“I’m glad. I don’t want to see you hurt, Harmony. I never want to see that sadness in your eyes,” he admitted. “You’re special.”
She wasn’t sure what he meant.
“How do you know that?” she asked. Harmony was pretty sure she was ordinary.
“Because when I look at you, I see the most amazing woman in the world, and when I’m near you, I’m happy. There were few things in my life after my father’s death that made me happy.”
“Like?”
“My career, our first date, and being here with you,” he admitted.
Max put the ice cream cookie down and pulled a pink flower off of the bunch. Then he tucked it behind her ear.
“A pretty flower for a gorgeous woman. That makes me happy too.”
Her heart skipped.
“Oh, Maximus,” she said, her whole world flipping upside down at his words. He made her feel special.
“If I could go back and fix it, I would,” he said.
“Can I ask you something?” she asked.
“Anything.”
“You’re dating a woman.”
“Okay.”
“She’s raped and comes home crying but won’t tell you what happened. You know something is wrong, but you don’t know what.”
“Okay.”
“What do you do?”
“Am I dating her or am I in a relationship with her?” he asked. “There’s a difference.”
“Relationship.”
“I’d hold her, I’d love her, and I’d do anything I could to protect her. I’d like to think I’d know. I’d like to believe that if I knew her as well as I thought I did, that I’d see that something had happened, and I’d do whatever I could to make her safe.”
“Would you really know?”
“I’m a cop. I would know.”
Yeah, she thought the same thing.
“Why aren’t you married?” she asked.
He laughed.
“Well, you saw my first date skills. Take a wild guess. It’s not a mystery,” he said, grinning at her.
All the King's Henchmen Page 34