by Amanda Tru
Geneva’s eyes sparkled. “My veil caught on a limb and ripped off. After that, I knew I couldn’t keep running or else they could get a clear shot of my face. I slid down the embankment to the river, hoping all of the trees and brush would conceal my exit. Then I waded in the water and hid under a bridge.”
“That would certainly explain it,” London murmured, looking at the dress helplessly. The grime caked the once white lace that now hung in shreds from the hemline.
Taking a deep breath, London stepped back and smiled bravely at the crowded apartment. “All of you were helping me. How could I be upset? The plan worked, and I’m so very grateful for each of you coming to my rescue. After all, they are only dresses.”
After hugs all around, the ladies finished changing, leaving London to spread the soiled dresses on a sheet across her bed. Soon, the busy apartment emptied with her thanks echoing after her guests. Even Mason left with the others, and understandably so. The poor man hadn’t really slept in about forty-eight hours. With a room waiting for him at London’s parents’ house, he fully intended to take advantage of it to get a little sleep.
London shut the front door and turned back around. Sydney rummaged around in the kitchen, trying to locate something to eat. Not feeling hungry, London wandered back into her room to stare at her bed full of gowns.
Now that everyone was gone, she was free to see the full extent of damage and admit the truth. The dresses weren’t salvageable. As much as she wished she could fix them, a thorough study and mourning for every inch of fabric convinced her that even her best methods of restoring gowns would fall quite short of magic.
“I’m really sorry, London,” Sydney’s voice spoke softly from behind her. “I know how much they meant to you. They served a worthy cause, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.”
“They are only dresses,” London repeated, wishing that saying the words would make them true.
“No, they aren’t,” Sydney said bluntly. “You can use that line on everyone else, but it won’t work on me. Those dresses told the story of your love life. Every experience you had, every dream you hoped for was represented in those gowns.”
“That’s a romantically noble way of saying that I made a wedding dress for every guy I ever dated,” London appreciated Sydney’s words, but she knew how it really looked. “I didn’t realize you knew about them.”
“Ha! How could I not? What kind of nosy twin sister would I be if I hadn’t noticed you carting around a closet full of wedding dresses wherever you moved?”
“But I never explained the why.”
“London, I’m sorry, but you aren’t that mysterious. Every time you’d go out with a new guy, I’d see you immediately start scribbling away in your sketchbook. Soon, another dress made an appearance in the closet, even if you never dated the guy again.”
“Stupid, isn’t it? What kind of person does that? I even made dresses for the guys I really disliked.”
“Give yourself a break, London. Everyone has their quirks.”
“This is a little more than a quirk, and you know it.”
“Well, you don’t need to continue doing it. Now is the perfect time to let it all go. After all, using the dresses as a massive decoy bride operation is a pretty amazing finale.”
Could she do that? Could she toss the gowns in the trash and move on without them?
Tears pricked her eyes. “Sydney, without the dresses, I don’t think I know who I am or what I’m doing here. It’s not just the dresses that are a mess, it’s my whole life. I left Hollywood because I wanted to come back home in every sense. I wanted to come back to the faith and the simpler life that we had here in Crossroads. Then, when Adam came back into my life, I thought that was somehow appropriate. My life’s journey led me back to the beginning. But now, everything is in chaos. All of the doors I thought God opened, have now slammed in my face. My place of business is gone. There’s no way I can continue working in Rhonda’s building, which means I can’t keep my fashion designing here in Crossroads. And I have no idea what to do with Adam. If he’s the one for me, why do I still have feelings for Mason? I thought Adam was who I wanted, but now, half the time, I’m not even sure I like the guy. But shouldn’t I? I have no idea what God is telling me, but I feel like I really must be screwing up. He’s obviously trying to get my attention, or maybe I just misunderstood when I thought He wanted me to come home in the first place.”
Sydney’s eyes shone with compassion, and she perched on the edge of the bed next to the rags of wedding gowns. “London, it’s admirable that you wanted to renew your relationship with God and move that back to priority in your life. I think it good to desire a simpler way of life. But God doesn’t ever intend for you to go backward. The faith you return to shouldn’t be that of an eighteen-year-old. It should be the faith of someone who has matured and faced heartbreak, loss, and everything that life throws at you. It’s a faith of experience, not of ignorance. You’ve seen what life has to offer and decided God has so much more. Don’t go back, London.”
“But I want what I had before,” London maintained, scooting the gowns over so she had room to sit on the bed beside her sister. “I want that simple faith and way of life with family dinners, laughter, and none of the world’s ugliness. I want black and white. I want to be that girl who thought Adam was Prince Charming.”
Sydney frowned. “Is your memory that fuzzy, London? Life wasn’t so rosy at the time. You couldn’t wait to get out of here. Mom drove us both nuts, Dad was gone on business all the time, we couldn’t keep up with Gen’s antics and the heart palpitations she gave Mom, and we couldn’t live up to little-miss-perfect Brooke. And all that goes to show you just how immature we were. We didn’t realize what we had then, just like we probably don’t realize what we have now.”
London thought back, realizing the truth in Sydney’s words. Maybe her memories really did come equipped with rose-colored glasses. The more she thought, the more she remembered the yucky things she didn’t like about growing up. Gen always made them tardy to school and stole any boy who expressed interest. For some reason, after flirting with Adam initially, Gen had declared him too straight-laced and relinquished him to London in the one and only instance, never to flirt with him again.
Gen wasn’t alone in her ability to aggravate London. Sydney drove her crazy by impersonating her every chance she got. No one could seem to tell them apart, and the majority of the time, if someone assumed she was London, Sydney wouldn’t correct them but would simply play along just for fun. She really didn’t know how many dates Adam went on with Sydney, thinking she was London. And of course, Sydney would tease and toy with her victims, and then London would get blamed.
“Today’s trials mix the paint for tomorrow’s golden years,” London murmured.
Sydney’s eyebrows lifted in surprise. “London, that’s beautiful and so very true. The bad things in life blur and we often remember the good. That’s not always true, but it does happen.”
London nodded. “Funny how it works. I can recite every embarrassing moment I had in high school, and yet beyond the details, I don’t remember the stress of the everyday. Maybe God is merciful in giving us fuzzy memories. It would be miserable if we remembered the pain of every single moment.”
A faraway look dawned in Sydney’s eyes, and she seemed almost sad. “Trust me. That is very much a blessing. God doesn’t leave us in the same place He found us. You aren’t meant to stay that eighteen-year-old. God has so much more life for you to live, both good and bad, and He intends to use those experiences to shape us. In my line of work, you never go backward. You keep learning and adapting. Turning around is dangerous.”
“I just thought…” London sighed. “Adam is everything I thought I wanted. He’s grown into the man who checks everything off that list I made as a teen.”
“And yet, you don’t love him.” It was a statement, not a question.
“I don’t know,” London said, thoroughly miserable. “I w
ant to love him. Mason isn’t at all what I want. I loathe the Hollywood lifestyle. I just can’t let myself love him. He doesn’t match my list.”
“Come on, London. Not the stupid list! I shredded my list long ago. Sure, there are some non-negotiables—like I’m not going to marry someone who is already married. It’s just not going to happen. I’m not into the polygamy thing. If that’s not on your list, I think that definitely should be very near the top.”
London tossed a pillow Sydney’s direction, realizing her sister’s patience for the conversation was dwindling, and any frustration would now be translated with teasing humor.
Sydney easily dodged the pillow, taking a dive into the bed and landing right in the middle of the gowns. Not caring at all, she spread out and looked up at London, pointedly daring her to freak out about her lounging across the blanket of previously-precious gowns.
With eyebrows raised in a dare, Sydney said, “Nobody grows up thinking she is going to marry the garbage man. Every woman dreams of a prince, but very few men actually hold that profession. At the end of the day, you don’t fall in love with what a man does, you fall in love with who he is.”
London stared at her twin and heard the words repeat in her mind. You fall in love with who he is…
Sydney scrambled off the bed, knocking a few gowns to the floor in the process. Then she stretched with her arms over her head and yawned. “Make your own dress, London,” she said finally. Don’t make a ‘Mason,’ or an ‘Adam,’ or a ‘Jack,’ or a ‘Stephano,’ or a ‘Timbuktu.’ Make a ‘London.’ Figure out who you are today—not a dozen years ago—and then you can figure out who you truly love, and who you want by your side as you step into tomorrow.”
Not seeming to realize the profound things she’d said, Sydney wearily trudged out of the room, leaving London still staring at the pitiful gowns.
Deep in thought, London left them where they lay and picked up her sketchbook from her nightstand. With pencil in hand, she took the tablet and sat in the middle of the bed right atop the remaining gowns.
If I were to design “The London,” what would it look like?
“Adam is here,” Sydney whispered on her way past.
London jerked her head around to the window to see confirmation of Adam’s car pulling up to the curb to join her siblings’ cars.
Oh no! What is he doing here?
She didn’t want to talk to him now. She’d been working up her courage to talk to him either tomorrow or Sunday, but not now! How could she pretend in front of her family that everything was fine? And yet she couldn’t break up with the guy while all of her siblings meandered around.
She should have taken care of things sooner. She’d known for almost two weeks now that things weren’t going to work out with Adam, and yet she’d put him off. She’d been busy trying to find a new location for her business, and he’d been out of town for a few days. He’d called her yesterday, and she’d promised to get together sometime this weekend. She certainly hadn’t anticipated him showing up at a Hutchins’ family dinner!
A family dinner wasn’t an unusual occurrence. London’s mom, Lydia, used any excuse to get dinner for the family. In this case, they were hosting a birthday celebration for London’s brother, Israel. With the difficulties Israel had experienced the past few years, everyone wanted to make the day special for him. In a rare occurrence, all seven Hutchins siblings were in attendance for the party. Now it looked like London would inadvertently add a “date” to the guest list, which would, of course, provide ample entertainment and speculation among her siblings.
“Hey, London, Adam is here!” Geneva called, opening the door to him before chasing after their niece, Chloe. Though Gen still maintained her status as a flirt, Adam apparently was still on the very short list of men she paid no attention to.
Realizing that she couldn’t really hide and pretend she wasn’t here, London bravely hurried forward with a friendly smile. “Hi, Adam, what a surprise! What are you doing here?”
“I ran into Sydney at lunch today, and she told me about Israel’s party tonight. She said I was welcome, so I thought I’d come surprise my best girl. I haven’t seen you in weeks.” Adam leaned in for a quick kiss, and London barely managed to intercept it with her cheek.
“Sydney told you?” London sent a glare her sister’s direction, and Sydney just smiled innocently and offered a little wave.
She ambushed me! If she intended to butt into my love life, the least she could have done was impersonate me and break up with Adam for me!
Adam nodded. “I know we haven’t had a chance to talk lately, so I was hoping we might be able to do that tonight. With us both so busy, I didn’t want to wait.”
That’s really kind of sweet!
London nodded. “I wanted to talk to you as well. Unfortunately, there isn’t a lot of privacy around here.” London gestured hopelessly around the packed house. With her siblings and their significant others, their growing family spread through the entire first floor of the house and into the backyard. No area guaranteed the absence of listening ears.
Adam took London’s hand and pulled gently. “No one is out front.”
London made herself follow, bravely placing one foot in front of the other. This conversation was unavoidable, yet that didn’t make her feel any better about it.
They slipped out the front door, and Adam pulled her into the shade of the large oak tree dominating the yard. When Adam turned to face her, London hurriedly spoke first. “Adam, I’ve realized a few things the past couple weeks that I need to share with you.”
“I have, too,” Adam said. “I haven’t mentioned anything before because I know how stressed you’ve been with your own difficulties. I didn’t want to add my stress onto yours. I saw all of the news coverage where you played the part of the bride, but I haven’t had a chance to ask you what happened. Was it a practical joke or something?”
“No, remember how I called you that day, but you couldn’t talk?” London asked, grateful for the distraction. “Rhonda had spilled the wedding location for one of my exclusive clients. I developed an elaborate plan to trick the media into leaving the area so the real couple could get married.”
Adam frowned. “Is Rhonda okay?”
London shot him a look of confusion. “What do you mean?”
“It just seems like she’s had a difficult time lately, and I meant to ask you about it. I ran into her right after that celebrity wedding, and she seemed really upset. She mentioned something about you sabotaging her, but I knew that couldn’t be right. I wondered if she was unwell, but I didn’t get a chance to ask TeraLyn about it. Now you tell me she disclosed a private location for a client, which isn’t like her at all. Then I heard a rumor that you’re moving your business out of Snow White Bridal. What’s going on?”
London closed her eyes. She really didn’t want to wade through the whole mess to give him a report, mostly because she knew he would disapprove. More than likely, he’d side with Rhonda because, just like everyone else in town, he believed her to be the kindest treasure in all Crossroads.
London opened her eyes and looked at him directly. Maybe if he knew the truth, he would run the other direction, and she wouldn’t have to break up with him after all! “Remember when I asked you to go with me to retrieve the bridesmaids’ dresses for me to alter? Well, when you refused, I did it anyway. It all turned out well. The bridesmaids and the bride were happy, but Rhonda found out and didn’t react well. That instance and a few others made her believe that I had been sabotaging her. After that, she ‘accidentally’ let the private wedding location of one of my well-known clients slip to the media. Even though she claimed it unintentional and we were able to save the wedding, I’ve found I can no longer work in the same building with her. I dislike her methods, and I cannot trust that she won’t ‘accidentally’ sabotage me in some other way.”
“London, I can’t believe you did that!” Adam gasped, taking her actions as a personal offense. “You br
oke into a house and stole a bunch of dresses! You interfered with Rhonda’s clients! And you did it all behind her back! No wonder she was upset! Poor Rhonda has the biggest heart. You were only in her shop because of her good will, and you treated her like that? I don’t think I know you at all! The London Hutchins I know would never step across the line like that!”
Slow-burning anger lit in her chest, and she glared at his perfectly combed hair and his eyes shining brightly with integrity behind his glasses. “I do not need a lecture from you, Adam. I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I am not the girl I was a dozen years ago. I am no longer the person who blindly follows the rules just because they are the rules. I will bend those rules in order to do what’s right. I know you and everyone else see Rhonda as perfect, but I’ve had a behind the scenes look at how she controls and manipulates people and then covers it all with sugary-sweet claims of her good intentions. My motivation was only and always to help people, and I tried to do it in a way that wouldn’t offend or hurt Rhonda in the process. I didn’t succeed in that, and in retrospect, I realize I should have probably confronted her directly about my objections to her methods. I am not perfect, and I probably could have handled things better than I did with Rhonda, but I do not regret what I did. I cannot promise you that if I see something wrong, I won’t again bend what you perceive as the rules to try to make it right.”
Adam looked startled at her anger. With a few blinks of his eyes, his indignation drained from his gaze. London didn’t recall ever speaking to him in such a way, and the stunned look on his face confirmed it.
Then, with a firm nod, his expression changed, and he said in a professional tone, “I admire your desire to help people, but I don’t think I can completely agree with your methods. It sounds like you realize you could have handled things better. Maybe in the future, we can work to communicate better and figure out how to right the world’s wrongs together in a way that doesn’t bend the rules. I’m glad you see your own mistakes. I forgive you and know we can work on better solutions together.”