Dante just shook his head before muttering, “Asshole.” He then leaned into me and said, “You, I’ll get even with later.”
“You know…” I offered, deflecting Dante’s threat. “You could be having twins. Your grandmother is a twin, right, Brae?”
Poor Brae’s face paled at the thought. “Yes, but the whole skipping a generation theory is a myth.”
“Well, let’s not forget Soren has twin sisters,” Kyle piped in.
“It’s not up to the male,” Brae said, trying to negate the possibility again.
“Ah, but you forget I have super sperm,” Jude added with pride.
“Oh my God! You didn’t say that out loud.” Brae laughed at her husband, but the endearing look in her eyes meant she agreed with him.
Dante’s phone buzzed, and when his expression morphed from elation to concern, we all paused. “Sorry, it’s from overseas and not a number I recognize. Let me grab this. Please excuse me.”
As soon as Dante stepped away, the rapid-fire questions began. Everyone wanted to know about our relationship. Even Luca chimed in. “Cass, I’ve never seen my brother like this… so happy. It’s because of you; I’m sure of it.”
“Well, I feel the same way. It’s weird, you guys. I really like him. It feels right when we’re together. For the first time in my life, I feel like a true couple… that should make you happy, Brae.”
“It does, very much. Picture us in ten years, all married and with our kids in the Hamptons playing together on the beach.” Brae sighed and Vanessa choked. “Oh, Vanessa. Can you honestly say you don’t want a little Kyle or a mini-you someday?”
“Nope,” came from both of them in unison.
“I can.” That was true too. In the past, I knew I wanted to be a mother, but now that I had Dante, I could picture a little boy or girl perched on my lap as he snapped picture after picture while beaming with pride. “But we’re a long way from that nice imagery. You’re going to be a great mom, Brae.” Jude cleared his throat. “I have no doubt that you will be an incredible father. I’m thrilled for both of you.”
Luca laughed. “Wow, Cass. You just complimented Jude. You must be in a good mood.”
“I am, and you have your brother to thank for that.”
“Speak of the Devil,” Vanessa said, pointing behind me. “Looks like the call was good news.”
Dante returned with an elated look on his face.
“Everything okay?” Luca asked when it was obvious it was.
“Better than okay. Do you remember Matteo Romano? I worked as his apprentice for a while.” Luca nodded, and Dante turned his attention to me. “He’s the man I told you about. The one who runs a gallery.”
“Yes, I remember.”
“Well, he’s just presented me with the opportunity of a lifetime. One that I’ve dreamt of but never thought would happen.” For some reason my heart sank into the pit of my stomach. “He wants me to take over running his business. I’ll be traveling to different parts of the world creating stills for the gallery.” And there was the reason.
All eyes swung to me, but all I could see was the joy on Dante’s face. Tears threatened, and I knew if I let them fall, it would ruin Dante’s moment. Gathering my wits, I plastered a smile on my face. “That’s wonderful! Congratulations! Dispatch must be the place for great news. First, Desiree, then Brae, and now you.”
Luca turned to his brother. “When does this start? You just got here.”
God, I didn’t want to hear his response. All I could think was that this was over… that we were over.
Dante answered his brother but kept his eyes on me. “I still need to get the details, but enough about me. Here’s to Brae and Jude.”
Chapter 23
Dante
I lied. All the details were laid out in an email Matteo sent after his call, but to voice them to Cassie in front of everyone didn’t sit well with me. Explaining everything that the contract specified needed to be done in private.
The euphoria I felt when Matteo announced his decision to pass his legacy on to me slowly diminished with each second that ticked on the clock. So much so, that by the time we pulled up to my building, all that happiness had morphed into doubt.
From the cab ride to the elevator, Cassie remained indifferent. My girl forgot that I could read her like a book. She put on an overly joyful face, yet it was clear she felt the opposite when the sparkle in her eyes disappeared.
Various scenarios of how to present this to her ran rampant in my head. When the elevator doors opened with a ding, I placed my hand on her back and guided her to my apartment. No sooner had I shut the door behind us and flicked on the lights than Cassie gasped.
“Do you like it?” She stood stock-still in awe of her image, which had replaced Charlene’s on my wall.
“When did you do this?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
I took a moment to appreciate the beauty staring back at us. “A couple days ago. I wanted to surprise you.”
She smiled. “Well, it worked.” My first thought when I hung the picture was she would be flabbergasted yet have a lot to say. Instead, she remained reticent.
“Cassandra, I think we need to talk.”
No argument came when I took her hand and led her to the sofa. I wondered if I hadn’t kept my hold on her if she would have distanced herself physically… like she seemed to have already done emotionally. I forced her to stay close, knowing it was a pathetic attempt to keep her with me. Maybe I believed she would subconsciously catalog our relationship to that point and use it to my advantage.
“You need to know, I was just as surprised as you when I received that phone call. Never in my wildest imagination did I think Matteo would be passing the reins to me. Granted, I hoped one day he would, but to have it happen now, at my age, is unheard of.”
“I’m thrilled for you. You’ve been working your whole life for this, and you did it. When will you have the details?”
“I got them via email before we left the bar.”
“Oh, and?”
“I would need to report to the gallery in Milan in two weeks. And then, right after the first of the year, I’ll be required to travel abroad for two years.”
My announcement siphoned the blood from her face, even though she tried to cover it up with a forced smile. “Then what?”
“I’ll return to Milan for the gallery’s opening.”
“What about your apartment?”
“This isn’t forever. I plan to come back one day.”
“One day.” If I wasn’t watching her mouth, I would have missed it. Suddenly, Cassie the cheerleader emerged out of nowhere. She gripped my hands and with a huge smile said, “This is amazing. I’m so happy and proud of you. Your dream, Dante… it’s coming true. What a fantastic opportunity for you. Your life is going to be fabulous.”
If she threw out one more colorful adjective I would scream. Not once did she utter the word “we” or “us.” Instead, she took herself out of the equation. Her peppy words contradicted her lackluster smile. With each moment that passed, I felt her pulling further away from me.
“Cassandra, I want you to come with me.” Her body went rigid, and an intense silence enveloped the room.
“Dante…”
“Think about it, and how great it would be together. You can travel the world…”
“And do what? See the sights by myself? Sit in a hotel room and wait for you to come back from a shoot?”
“But you’d be with me.” Her eyes widened, and I wasn’t sure if it was at my arrogance or the blasé way I said it.
“No, I wouldn’t really. I’m a teacher. My job and my life are here. I fought hard for all that I have—you know that. How can I just pack up and leave it all behind? Why would I do that?”
“For us.” Her eyes stared blankly at her picture behind me. Cupping her face, I brought her attention to mine. “I’m the happiest I’ve been in my entire life, and that’s because of you. Things are j
ust getting started for us. We have our entire lives waiting to be lived, to see the world through each other’s eyes. I want to share my dream with you. You changed everything. Cassandra, I’m falling in love with you.” I paused and shook my head. “No, that’s wrong. I have fallen for you.”
Her petite hands wrapped around my wrists. My heart hammered in my chest, waiting for her to profess she felt the same. When she pulled my arms down, I worried that wasn’t the case. Tears filled her eyes, but the resigned look on her face scared the hell out of me.
“Don’t do this now.” Hearing her say that was no different than a slap to my face.
“Do what?” Again she clammed up. “Dammit, Cassie. Talk to me.”
She sucked in a breath and her eyes began to shimmer. “I need time. This came out of nowhere for me, Dante. You’ve been living with this possibility your whole life. When do you need to let them know?”
Fuck. It never, ever occurred to me this would be an issue. How fucking dumb was I to assume the woman I had fallen for, who I thought was also falling for me, wouldn’t do this with me.
“Dante?”
“I already accepted the offer.”
Astonishment touched her pale face. “So all we have left is two weeks?”
A surge of anger came out of nowhere at her flippant statement. “Why are you doing this?”
“Doing what, Dante?” I watched her jump off the couch and stare down at me. “Did you truly believe I would drop everything to hop onto your dream? What happens to me if things don’t work out between us?” Before I could even say one word in response, she shook her head in resignation. “Please don’t say it’s not a possibility. It happened in your past, ironically for the same reason. Did you drop everything to go with Charlene to Paris?”
“She never asked.”
“Would you have?” My five-second pause gave her the answer she needed. “Exactly,” she said quietly.
The three feet between us may as well have been a mile. Until now, I controlled my success, my destiny, my fate. Despair began to fester in the pit of my stomach. I’d never felt so helpless, yet resentful that someone else held my happiness in their hands. And I still had no confidence she felt the same about me. “Do you love me?”
“Yes, but…”
“No. You don’t get to do that. It’s a yes or no.”
“No, it’s not, Dante. I do love you, but it wasn’t too long ago we were each on separate paths. In a matter of hours, you’re asking me to change all my plans without looking back.”
“It’s called a leap of faith, Cassie.” The way I emphasized her nickname sounded like a hiss.
“Maybe. But for me it’s abandoning my life for yours.” She came to sit beside me again, taking my hand between hers. “It wouldn’t be fair for me to expect you to give this up, and clearly it didn’t even occur to you to do that. It’s also not fair for you to assume I’d be coming with you.”
“Cassandra.” I had no idea how to respond to her. Actually, I did. I wanted to demand she not throw away what we had. I wanted to insist she allow me to live my dream and still keep her. Even as irrational as that sounded, I still wanted both. “Are you asking me to choose? Because I’ll choose you.”
“You can’t. I’m making the choice for you. You’re going, Dante. You have to, and I need you to. I cannot live with that, with the fear that someday you’ll resent me… and you will. Maybe not soon, but sure enough when you’re sick of photographing models, you’ll hate the fate you were forced to have because you chose me.”
“And you won’t come with me? Even knowing you love me and I love you, you’ll throw that away?”
“You’ve lived that lifestyle, place to place, hotel to hotel… the farthest I’ve gone was Connecticut to New York. And it took a lifetime to get here. Living in the city, doing what I love to do, away from all pretentiousness I grew up with, is my dream. Not only that, I saw marriage and kids in that scenario.”
“I want that too.”
“When? Five years from now? Until another phenomenal opportunity arises, as we both know it could. You’re crazy talented, Dante, and this could be the beginning of years and years of opportunities for you.”
We stared at each other, each choking on our reality, feeling the weight of our situation stealing our breath… stealing the ability to speak. When long moments passed, I shook my head with a sigh. “So you think we should break up?”
“I don’t know.”
The tears that welled in her eyes may as well have been tiny daggers to my heart. Those I wiped away felt like acid on the pads of my thumbs. It took every ounce of willpower not to scream, “You’re coming with me,” knowing how selfish that request was.
“Dante, I need time,” she finally said. “A few hours ago we were in a happy relationship, and now we’re sitting on your sofa discussing ending it. All I want right now is to crawl into bed and have you hold me all night.”
“I want that too.” I stood, offering her my hand. I wanted to say I’d hold her forever, if she’d let me. How hypocritical, because that also meant I wanted her to give up everything for me.
Cassie
I knew he hadn’t slept much, because I also lay awake most of the night. Every so often, his lips would find my shoulder, and his arms would tighten around my waist. My own hands seemed glued to his arms, refusing to put an inch of space between us. We weren’t naked… it wasn’t sexual… it was committing every second of every minute we had left to memory.
Most of the night I tried to envision our lives if I decided to go. Of course, never having lived that way, I couldn’t fathom what day-to-day life would be like. For someone like me, the unknown, the lack of structure, could cause more stress than happiness. Wouldn’t that be the same as Dante giving up his opportunity to stay with me?
When you loved someone, you sacrificed. I got that, even never having been in love. That was the other problem. Who did the sacrificing?
Shit, I felt awful thinking that way. I did love him. The thought of living without him scared me to death. That alone should’ve had me packing a bag tonight. Yet the possibility of coming back in a few months, a year, because his feelings for me changed, or mine for him, scared me far worse.
Never have I been consumed with so much confusion. Even when my parents were on my ass over my decision to become a teacher, to remain in the city, were no-brainers as far as I was concerned.
I truly didn’t know what to do. And once he left in two weeks, it terrified me imagining him halfway across the world without me.
His body shifted, and his grip around me tightened. “You awake?”
“Yes.” I slowly spun in his arms to face him. Our eyes locked, and I couldn’t pull mine away from his. “It really isn’t fair, you know.” I brushed a lock of hair off his forehead. “Waking up looking as sexy as you do.”
He managed a weak smile before he suddenly buried his hand in my hair, pulling me to him. When his lips landed on mine, that same zing I felt when he’d done it the first time was still there. All my life I have searched for that, for the zing that so many described and were fortunate enough to find. Here I’d found it, and now I was possibly letting it go.
Would a long-distance relationship work? Would my feelings for him change if I didn’t have him with me every day? Would he feel the same and decide the loneliness wasn’t worth it? And how long would that take? A month? A year? The entire time he was gone?
“Come with me, Cassandra. Please.” Hope flickered in the depths of his brown eyes. “I know you need time, but I’m not giving up on us.”
I couldn’t bring myself to say, I can’t. So like the coward I was, I completely skirted the issue. “Are you hungry? I can make us breakfast.”
He let out a breath, knowing why I needed to change the subject. “Sure, is it okay if I shower first?”
“Take your time,” I replied, knowing why he needed that alone time away from me.
Slipping on the shirt he wore last night to Dispatch
, I inhaled his scent deep into my lungs as I walked out of his bedroom. The first thing I saw was my face on his wall. That picture didn’t win him awards. The only explanation for me to be covering half his living room was his feelings for me. It confirmed he loved me, all while feeling like a knife to my heart.
As Dante showered and I fried bacon, my phone buzzed on the counter. Glancing down, I saw a message from Brae.
Where are you? We’re at brunch.
Oh my God, I completely forgot about meeting them.
I’m sorry. Not going to make it. I’m at Dante’s.
Is everything okay?
No, it isn’t. I’ll fill you in later.
Okay. Love you, Cass.
Love you too. And congrats again. You’re going to be a great mom.
Thank you. So will you one day.
And there it was. I stared at my phone, paying no attention to the burning bacon. Dante reached around me, shut off the burner, and moved the pan off the heat. His arms circled me while he kissed the back of my head. “Trying to torch the place?”
“Sorry. Brae texted because I forgot about our brunch date.”
“Do you want to go meet them?”
“No. But I think I should leave.” I twisted in his hold, meeting him face-to-face. “Dante, standing in your apartment, acting as though nothing has changed, or will change, is killing me.”
The tension in his hold went limp. “So you’ve made up your mind?”
“Dante,” I said softly, holding his face. “You and I live in the real world. And as exciting as traveling the planet with you sounds, it’s not something I can just jump into and do. Overthinking is my norm, sensibility is my middle name, and throwing caution to the wind is not in my DNA.” The fight in him disappeared. How could he argue with my declaration?
The Mr. Wrong Series Page 99